Blacklisted Hitman : Mimli Tetikci…

7 Sep

CHAPTER 1 THE HOUSE WHERE I WAS BORN : BOLUM 1 DOGDUGUM EV

This is my progressing autobiography I write myself as blacklisted hitman. Bu benim mimli tetikci olarak sürekli yazdığım kendi hayat hikayem. I was born in my grand father Osman Cavus’ two-story wooden House. Osman Cavus Dedemin iki katli ahsap evinde dogdum. This house was in new Salikkaya neighborhood of Kuyumcullu Village of Karasu District. Bu ev Karasu İlçesi’nin Kuyumcullu Köyü’nün Yeni Salikkaya Mahallesi’nde idi. Later on my aunt Zeynep and her husband Zeki demolished it and built a new concrete house in its place. Daha sonradan Zeynep halam ve kocasi Zeki onu yıkıp yerine betondan bir ev yaptilar. I wish they renovated the original wooden house as a respect to nature and memories. Keşke doğaya ve anılara saygı için eski ahşap evi sağlamlaştırıp tutsalardı. I will try to write for respect to our nature and truthful memories. Ben doğaya ve gerçek anılara saygı için yazmaya çalışağım.

This old house had its main door with a front yard where you could see a gravel road coming from Kuyumcullu going to Kocaali town sidelining our front yard. Bu eski evde ön bahçeye bakan bir dış kapi vardi ki burdan bahceye bitisik olarak Kuyumcullu’dan gelip Kocaali’ye giden çakıl yolu gorürdünüz. From there you could also see wast fields of green hazel nuts and forests. Oradan uçsuz bucaksız fındık bahçelerini ve ormanlari görebilirdiniz. You could also see tiny gravel road going to old Salikkaya neighbourhood and it’s few houses from there. Oradan bakinca Eski Salikkaya mahallesine giden küçük çakıl yolu ve o mahallenin yeşillikler içindeki birkac evini de gorebilirdiniz. Old Salikkaya was on a higher hill than our new Salikkaya. Eski Salikkaya bizim yeni Salikkaya’dan daha yuksek bir tepe uzerindeydi. Behind Old Salıkkaya you could see endless beautiful Çamdağı ve Sarıcaali Forests. Eski Salıkkaya’nın ardında uçsuz bucaksız güzel Çamdağı ve Sarıcaali Ormanları’nı görebilirdiniz.

On left of the front yard there was a big wooden shed on several high posts which had a tile covered top. On bahcenin sol tarafında üstü kiremitle örtülü ve agac direkler uzerine yapilmis buyuk bir serender vardi. They used to cook food for workers during hazel nut picking season during summer time under this shed. Bu serenderin altinda yazin findik toplama zamani işçiler icin yemek pişirilirdi.

Behind the house was towards north with hazel nuts fields and some fruit trees up to the sea. Evin arkasi kuzeye bakıyordu ve denize kadar fındık bahçeleri vardı. West side was a fenced yard and barn for cows with a side door from our house and a gate to go to road. Bati tarafında inekler için bir ahır ve avlu icinden yola çıkan bir tokma kapı ve eve giriş kapisı vardi. There was another storage shed behind the barn a little behind a hay making space near a small woods by the gravel road. Ahirin arkasinda harman yerinin ve yolun kıyısındaki ağaç kumesinin yaninda bir samanlık merek vardi.

I remember making hay with a tractor in that hay space. Bu harman yerinde traktorle buğday harmani yaptığımızı hatırlıyorum. I never had enough gazing at amazing views of Black Sea, woods and hazel nuts around there. Oralardan Karadeniz’in, ormanlarin ve fındık bahçelerinin muhteşem manzarasini seyretmeye doyamazdım.

East side of the front yard was another little fruit field and house with yard belonged to our neighbor Recep Kar. Ön bahçenin doğu tarafinda komşumuz Recep Kar’a ait kucuk bir meyvalik ve bahceli ev vardı. Neighbor’s fruit field was tightly fenced and his house was covered by some hazel nut trees which blocked the view of neighbor’s house from road side. Komsunun meyveliginde çitle orulmus bir avlu vardi ve yol tarafinda da komşumuzun evini gormeyi engelleyen findik ocaklari vardi.

Further east of the neighbor’s house there was a little shed in the open by the road where neighbor’s son Musa Kar traded hazel nuts and sold some sugar coated crackers and sweet nuts during late summer. Komşunun evinin daha da dogusunda yolun kıyısındaki meydanda komşumuzun oğlu Musa Kar’in yaz sonunda findik aldigi ve sekerleme sattigi bir kulübesi vardi. I remember as a child I collected and sold some hazelnuts for sugary stuff with my family members but always felt cheated somehow. Ailemin oteki fertleriyle findik başağı topladigimi ve şekerleme almak için Musa’ya sattığimı hatırlıyorum fakat hep dolandırıldigımı hissediyordum. Musa was not a pleasing trader. Musa iyi bir tüccar değildi. He destroyed his family with his gambling habit and beaten my mother later on which provoked me and my brothers to beat him hard in the middle of Kuyumcullu village square. Sonradan Musa kumar alışkanlığı yüzünden kendi ailesini mahvetti ve annemi dövdüğü için benim kardeşlerimle beraber kendisini Kuyumcullu çarşısında kendisine bir meydan dayağı atmamıza sebep oldu.

CHAPTER 2 HOW THE LIME PIT BLINDED ME : BOLUM 2 KIREC KUYUSU BENI NASIL KOR ETTI

There was a lime pit east of our front yard near neighbor’s fruit field. Evin on bahçesinin dogu tarafinda komsunun mevvaligina yakin yerde bir kirec kuyusu vardi. I think my grand father and my father and uncles were painting the rooms with white lime from this pit. Sanirim dedem, babam ve amcamlar bu kuyudan evin odalarini beyaz kirecle boyuyorlardi.

When l was only two I fell in the lime pit from farm tractor trailer due to total neglect. Tamamen ihmal sonucu daha iki yasimdayken traktor kasasindan kirec kuyusuna dustum. I was almost drown to death in the hot lime pit. Sicak kirec kuyusunda nerdeyse bogularak oluyordum. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lime_(material)

I cannot remember really how I got on the trailer and afterwards. Romorkun ustune nasil ciktigimi ve sonrasini pek hatirlayamiyorum. But I remember very well when I was in the bus with my father riding back and forth to hospital. Fakat otobuste babamla hastaneye gidip geldigini cok iyi hatirliyorum. Because a lot of people showed their pity to my blindness in the bus and spoke to me by showing their open affection to me. Cunku otobuste bircok kisi korlugume acimis ve bana karsi acik sefkatlerini gostererek konusmuslardi.

I had total painful blindness for a year and from this am still color blinded today! Bir yil kadar korkunc acilarla tamamen kor yasadim ve bu nedenle hayatim boyunca renk koru kaldim. Grandfather Osman Cavus’ supposedly sane household opened a huge pit without any protective barrier right by the front yard and mixed lime with water and sent my mother to the field to work and mounted me on the trailer without proper warning! Osman Cavus Dedemin guya akilli hane halki tam evin on bahçesinde kocaman bir kuyu acmislar ve kirecle suyu karistirmislar ve annemi de tarlada calismaya yollamislar ve beni de iyice uyarmadan romorkun ustune koymuslardi.

CHAPTER 3 I WAS ALWAYS TIED TO A TREE : BOLUM 3 BENI HEP AGACA BAGLADILAR

My mother and my aunt Binnaz Ak told me my grand father Osman Cavus household used to tie me to the trees in front of the house as there was nobody to watch me as soon as l began walking as they sent my mother to the back of the house or barn or to the field to work. Annem ve Binnaz Ak halam yurumeye baslar baslamaz annemi evin arkasina, ahira ve tarlaya calismaya yolladiklari icin bana bakacak kimse olmadigindan beni evin onundeki agaclara baglayarak tuttuklarini anlatiyor. Actually there was my aunt Mumine who was unmarried then but they did not think I was worth a nany. Esasinda Mumine halam daha evlenmemisti fakat benim bir bakiciyi hak ettigimi dusunmuyorlardi.

This near-death trauma and lengthy painful blindness and to be tied to the tree all day with feces all over me had massive effect on my psychology. Bu olume yakin travmanin ve uzun korlugumun ve heryanima diskilar bulasmis halde butun gun agaca bagli kalmanin butun hayatim boyunca ruhsal yapima buyuk etkisi oldu.

Grandfather Osman Cavus’ crowded household took away my mother from me to slave for them and neglected me to almost my death. Osman Cavus dedemin kalabalik hane halki annemi zorla kendilerine kolelik yapmasi icin benden kopartti ve beni nerdeyse oldurecek kadar ihmal etti. This was due to fact that my mother was not allowed to care for me but forced to slave for my grandfather Osman Cavus’ house and big hazelnuts farm works! Bunun nedeni annemin bana bakmasina izin verilmeyerek Osman Cavus dedemin evinde ve buyuk findik ciftligindeki isler icin kolelik yapmaya zorlanmasiydi.

I suffered total neglect many years tied up to a tree with pants filled with feces and urine until we moved in our new house where my mother was allowed to watch us not to slave for grandfather Osman Cavus’ household! Annemin Osman Cavus dedemin hanesine kolelik yapmak yerine bize bakmasina izin verildigi yeni evimize tasinana kadar pantolonum diski ve idrarla dolu halde bir agaca bagli olarak senelerce tam bir ihmal yasadim. As any mother could not resist my poor angel mother too suffered mental breakdown from going through all falling in the pit, almost drowning in the lime, blindness and forced separation from her totally neglected son. Her anne gibi benim annem de tumden ihmal edildigi icin Kutuya dusen, nerdeyse bogulup olen, bir yil kor kalan, hergun diski dolu pantolonu ile agaca baglanan oglundan zorla ayrilmaya dayanamayarak sinir krizi gecirdi.

CHAPTER 4 MY MOTHER TRIES TO COMMIT SUICIDE : BOLUM 4 ANNEM INTIHARA TESEBBUS EDIYOR

As she struggled to care more for me and less to slave for the Osman Cavus’ household she was battered and abused to the extremes! Osman Cavus hanesine daha az kolelik yapmaya ve bana daha cok bakmaya ugrastigi icin dayaklar yiyip eziyetler cekti! She tried to kill herself to escape from her unbearable pains. Dayanilmaz acilarindan kurtulabilmek icin kendini oldurmeye calisti. As my mother’s mental health was severely broken over my traumatic experiences she was too soft towards me and did not know how to say no to me. Ruhsal sagligi benim yasadigim travmali deneyimler yuzunden son derece bozulan zavalli annem bana karsi gereginden fazla yumusakti ve bana hayir demeyi bilmiyordu.

Therefore when l was three l wanted to play ball while we both laying in the bed and l started to kick between her legs and she did not know how to stop me out of her over-softness to me. Bu nedenle ben uc yasimdayken annemle birlikte yatakta yatarken yatakta top oynamak istedim ve annemin bacaklarinin arasini tekmelemeye basladim ve annem bana acidigindan bana karsi duydugu asiri yumusaklikla bana engel olmadi. This became like a habit and l felt like I am extremely sinful. Bu sanki bir aliskanlik oldu ve ben kendimi asiri derecede gunahkar hissettim.

Around that time my mother was locked up in the mental hospital again. O siralar annemi yine timarhaneye kapattilar. I suffered accidental bed-wetting until l was 13-14 due to my trauma l lived which worsened my life. Yasadigim travma nedeniyle 13-14 yaslarima kadar hayatimi daha da feci edecek sekilde arasira yatagimi islatmaktan muzdarip oldum.

My bed-wetting started as my father and Osman Cavus household members scared me by saying “we will bring a new mother to care for you”! Benim yatak islatma derdim babamin ve Osman Cavus hanesi halkinin beni “seni bakmak icin cici anne getirecegiz” diye korkutmasiyla basladi. I remember very well that my father wrapped my back with a dark sticky paper to stop my bed wetting instead of stopping to scare me which failed but my grandfather Osman Cavus never practiced faith heailing on me. Babamin yatak islatmami durdurmak icin beni uvey anne ile korkutmaktan vazgecmek yerine siyah renkli yapiskan bir kagidi sirtima yapistirmasinin bosa gittigini ve ancak dedemin bu konuda hic ufurukculuk yapmadigini cok iyi hatirliyorum.

CHAPTER 5 IN MY GRANDFATHER’S WINTER HOUSE : BOLUM 5 DEDEMIN KISLIK EVINDE

As I started to go to elementary school l stayed in grandfather Osman Cavus’ winter house in the Kuumcullu village center and refused to stay with my new step mother and father who lived in new house in Salikkaya with all my siblings so my bed-wetting magically stopped! Ilkokula gitmeye baslayinca Osman Cavus dedemin Kuyumculu koyu carsisindaki kislik evinde kaldim ve diger kardeslerimle Salikkaya’da yeni evde duran babamin ve uvey annemin yanina gitmeyi reddettim ve yatak islatma derdim sihirli bir sekilde kesildi. Believe or not grandfather Osman Cavus never did any faith healing for me! Ister inanin ister inanmayin Osman Cavus dedem yatak islatma derdim icin bana hic ufurukculuk yapmadi.

My bed-wetting stopped but my father and stepmother were very mad at me so my father used to hurt me whenever he can get me in grandfather Osman Cavus’ house! Yatak islatmayi kesmistim ama babam ve uvey annem bana cok kizgindilar ve babam Osman Cavus dedemin evinde her firsatta beni kistirip canimi yakiyordu. My protest against step mother lasted one year in grandfather Osman Cavus’ house and I was living with an old resident lady in the same room. Uvey anneme karsi protestom bir yil surdu ve Osman Cavus dedemin evinde yasayan yasli bir teyze ile ayni odada kaliyordum.

Contrary my roommate’s obvious sweetness to me l experienced open enmity from my uncle Yunus Iskender living in the next room. Oda arkadasimin acik dostluguna karsilik yan odada yasayan Yunus Iskender amcamin acik bir dusmanligini yasadim. I do not know why uncle Yunus was against me. Yunus amcamin neden bana karsi oldugunu bilmiyorum. I used to call my roommate oldmama and she would give me Turkish delight and take me to her warm bed in the cold winter days and she would keep me warm by hugging me. Oda arkadasima haminne diyordum ve haminnem bana lokum verir ve soguk kis gunlerinde beni sicak yatagina alip sarilarak isitirdi.

Maybe uncle Yunus was not good at his high school and getting mad at me as l was very good at school. Belki Yunus amcam lisedeki derslerinde kotu oldugu icin benim derslerimin cok iyi olmasi nedeniyle bana kizgindi. Uncle Yunus dropped out of high school never finished it. Yunus amcam liseyi bitirmeden terk etti. Like all family and friends Uncle Yunus witnessed how l was tied to a tree all day with my pants full of feces and fell in the lime pit and living with excruciating blindness for one year so he thought l was not a worthy nephew for him. Butun aile ve arkadaslar gibi Yunus amcam da butun gun diski dolu pantolonla bir agaca bagli olarak tutulmama ve kirec kuyusuna dusup bogulmaktan kurtulduktan sonra korkunc acilarla bir yil korluk yasamama sahit olmustu ve benim kendisine yakisan bir yegen olmadigimi dusunuyordu.

My aunt Binnaz Ak stopped at our house to give me a watch to reward me for my high achievements in the elementary and middle school she bought from Switzerland where she lived with her husband as guest workers but after she set the watch on my wrist she turned to my step brother Murat and said “you do not be bad like Recai brother, ok?”Isvicrede ailesiyle misafir isci olarak yasayan Binnaz halam yazin bizim yeni eve gelerek bana ilkokul ve ortaokuldaki yuksek basarilarimi odullendirmek icin getirdigi bir saati koluma taktiktan sonra uvey kardesim Murata donerek “sen Recai abin gibi kotu olma, olurmu” dedi. So aunt Binnaz proved again whatever l succeed did not change the fact that l am worthless nobody because of my birth from my mother and my protest stand against step mother.. Yani Binnaz halam neyi basarirsam basarayim annemden dogdugum ve uvey anneme protesto tavri takindigim icin hicbir degeri olmayan birkimse oldugum gercegini degistirmedigini bir kere daha ispatladi.

CHAPTER 6 MEAN UNCLE YUNUS: BOLUM 6 KOTU KALPLI YUNUS AMCAM

One day l entered from uncle Yunus’ ajar door in his room while he was doing a pencil drawing on something. Bir gun karakalem resim yaparken aralik kapidan Yunus amcamin odasina girdim. I happened to ask uncle Yunus “what is it you are drawing?” Yunus amcama “ne resmi ciziyorsun?” diye sordum. Uncle Yunus said it is the bus outside in front of the mosque. Yunus amcam disarda caminin onundeki otobus dedi. I looked at the bus and then at the drawing and said this never looks like a bus! Bir otobuse bir de resme baktim bu hic otobuse benzemiyor dedim!

He punched me in my face instantly to show his feeling to me. Bana olan duygusunu gostermek icin aninda yuzume bir yumruk vurdu. I run out of his room with fear but in a few days when l was standing by the village fountain in the main square between tea houses he drove my grand father Osman Cavus’ big farm tractor right to the fountain with high speed and crashed it to the fountain and got humiliated right in front of all fellow villagers.Yunus amcamin odasinda korkuyla kactim fakat bir kac gun sonra carsidaki koy cesmesinin yaninda dikilirken Yunus amcam traktorle asiri hiz yaparak geldi ve cesmeye vurdu ve butun koylunun onunde rezil oldu. Uncle Yunus almost crashed me with high speed instead of fountain. Yunus amcam cesme yerine azkalsin yuksek hizla bana carpiyordu. Uncle Yunus never drove anything after this all his life. Yunus amcam bu kazadan sonra butun hayati boyunca hicbir vasita kullanmadi.

While l was in grandfather Osman Cavus’ winter house my Grandfather dropped his eyeglasses down the old style turkish toilet pipe and I watched my grandmother made my elder sister Nezahat Iskender pick them up from the crap with her hands. Osman Cavus dedemin evinde kalirken dedem gozluklerini alaturka tuvaletin deligine dusurdu ve baba annemin ablam Nezahat Iskender’e gozlukleri diskidan elleriyle aldirmasini seyrettim. They rather have my sister’ face on top of dirty toilet hole than using some tool. Bu is icin bir alet kullanmaktansa ablamin yuzunu pis tuvalet deliginin agzina yapistirmayi tercih ettiler.

My sister Nezahat Iskender preferred to stay step mother and father and did not stay with us in the winter house. Ablam Nezahat Iskender uvey annem ve babamla kalmayi tercih ettigi icin bizimle kislik evde kalmadi.

I witnessed that aunt Pembe Cil’s son Orhan Cil came to get some faith healing for his back pains from my grandfather Osman Cavus. Pembe Cil halamin oglu Orhan Cil’in bel agrisi derdine sifa bulmak icin eve geldigine ve Osman Cavus dedemin ona okuyup ufledigine sahit oldum. My grandfather Osman Cavus made my mother have nervous breakdown and me go blind and bed-wet on one side while he claimed he can heal people by chanting meaningless words and blowing his breath to people! Osman Cavus dedem bir tarafta annemi sinir kirizine sokup intihara suruklerke ve beni kor edip yataklara isetirken ote tarafta anlamsiz sozleri okuyup ufleyerek insanlari iyilestirdigini iddia ediyordu.

One of constant scary gossip I always heard from our visiting neighbours in my grandfather Osman Cavus’ winter house was that some mysterious guy was shoving big wooden stick to women’s ass around the Kuyumcullu village during nights. Osman Cavus dedemin kislik evinde surekli olarak duydugum korkunc bir dedikodu ise kimligi bilinmeyen bir adamin geceleri tuvalete giden kadinlarin altina buyuk odun soktugu seklindeydi. This story proved the constant fear of violent sexual threat on the women in the Kuyumcullu village. Bu hikaye Kuyumcullu koyundeki kadinlar uzerindeki vahsi cinsel tehditten duyulan daimi korkuyu ispatliyordu.

CHAPTER 7 MEETING MY MEAN STEP MOTHER: BOLUM 7 KOTU KALPLI UVEY ANNEMLE KARSILASMAM

Unfortunately as I finished first year l was taken to the grandfather Osman Cavus’ summer house where they forced me back to the nearby house where my father and step mother lived with my siblings. Maalesef birinci sinif bitince yazin Osman Cavus dedemin Salikkayadaki yazlik evine gitmeye mecbur kaldim ve ordan da yakindaki babam, uvey annem ve kardeslerimin durdugu eve gecmeye mecbur kaldim. My mean mother and father had a massive negative effect on my psychology. Kotu kalpli annem ve babam pisikolojim uzerinde cok buyuk olumsuz etki yaptilar.

When l started to live with my step mother first thing she showed me to dominate me was her elementary school diploma. Uvey annemle yasamaya basladigim zaman uzerimde baski kurabilmek icin bana gosterdigi ilk sey ilkokul diplomasiydi. My mother was not even literate like half her female peers and her other half female peers was hardly literate and most her male peers hardly graduated three years elementary school as they only had a 3-years school in the Kuyumcullu village back then. Annem yasiti kadinlarin yarisi gibi okuma yazma bile bilmiyordu ve yasiti kadinlarin oteki yarisi ancak okur yazardi ve yasiti erkeklerin cogu ancak uc yillik ilkokulu zor bitirmislerdi cunku Kuyumcullu’daki ilkokul o zaman uc yillikti.

This action perfectly explains why my father and stepmother and Osman Cavus household tried to sabotage my education. Bu hareket babamin, uvey annemin ve Osman Cavus hane halkinin nicin benim okumami sabote ettiklerini mukemmelen aciklar. In order for them to continue to dominate me and prevent me to fight domestic injustice they had to prevent my education. Beni baski altina alabilmek ve aile icindeki haksizliga karsi mucadelemin onune gecmeye devam edebilmek icin okumami sabote etmeleri sartti.

My step mother opened the curtain of her cruel play with a sneaky hard knock on my nose to make me bleed like a river and then my bed-wetting started again. Uvey annem vahsi oyununun perdesini burnuma sinsi ve cok sert bir yumruk cakip dere gibi kanlarimi bosaltarak acti ve ben de yine yatak islatmaya basladim.

My step mother Hayriye Ozturk had my father throw my mother’s wedding gifts like Singer brand sewing machine on the dirt in the basement exposed to rain, sun and wind and then ordered me to destroy it and l did. Uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk ozannem Huriye Iskender’in Singer marka dikis makinesi gibi dugun hediyelerini babama bodrum katinda topragin icine attirmis ve yagmur, gunes ve ruzgara acik birakmis ve bana bunlari parcalamam icin emir vermis ve ben de yapmistim.

But as she threatened me with putting worm into my nose while l was sleeping to kill me l reacted! Fakat Ben uyurken burnuma solucan koyup beni oldurmekle tehdit etmeye baslayinca ben de tepki verdim. I found her jewelry gifts like her Citizen brand watch and earrings etc in their secret chest and buried them in some secret underground in the field to stop her and my father for allowing her to do bad stuff. Ben de uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk’u ve ona bu kotulukleri yapmasina izin veren babami durdurmak icin uvey annemin Citizen marka kol saati ve altin kupe gibi dugun hediyelerini gizli sandikta bulup cikardim ve onlari tarlada gizli bir yere gomdum. When she found out about it she cried, threatened me and got my father to beat me up. Durumu anladigi zaman agladi, beni tehdit etti ve babama beni dovdurdu.

After this wedding gift burial incident my step mother Hayriye Ozturk started to harass me every day like “one who has dead cries one day but one has insane cries everyday” referring to both me and my mother. Bu dugun hediyesi olayindan sonra uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk “olusu olan birgun, delisi olan hergun aglar” diyerek beni ve annemi kastederek hergun beni taciz etmeye basladi. My father joined her campaign to call me insane too. Babam da onun kampanyasina katildi ve bana delisin sen dedi. Both my father and step mother called me and my own mother insane for years. Hem babam hem de uvey annem beni ve annemi yillarca deli diye cagirdilar.

It was horrible twist that whatever I do would be portrayed as bad. Korkunc bir carpitmaydi ne yaparsam yapayim kotu olarak tasvir edilecekti. When I offered water melon treat to my aunt Ayse’s sons Vahdet and Abdullah who came to our field while l watched over our water melon field my father and step mother portrayed this as my dumbness and insanity! Karpuz tarlamiza bekcilik yaparken tarlaya gelen Ayse halamin ogullari Vahdet ve Abdullah’a yemek icin karpuz verdigim icin babam ve uvey annem beni yillarca beyinsiz ve deli olarak gosterdiler.

I made it a habit running away from grandfather Osman Cavus’ hous as soon as l started to walk to escape oppression on myself and on my mother, locking up of my mother in the hospital, abuse and neglect in his house. Osman Cavus dedemin evinde anneme ve bana uygulanan baski, annemin hastaneye kapatilmasi, ve yasadigim eziyet ve ihmal yuzunden yurumeye baslar baslamaz evden kacmayi aliskanlik haline getirdim. I was wandering freely. Alip basimi gidiyordum.

One day my paternal grandmother forced me and my brother Sezai to find the missing cows in the dark after sunset. Bir aksam gunes battiktan sonra karanlikta inekler eve gelmedigi icin baba annem beni kardesim Sezai ile inekleri bulmaya yolladi. As we failed to find the cows in an hour walk and we climbed to a safe tree and waited for the morning but had to go back as five year old brother Sezai started crying. Inekleri bulamayinca bir saatlik yolda guvenli bir agaca tirmanip sabah olmasini beklemeye basladik fakat bes yasindaki Sezai aglamaya baslayinca geri donduk.

For me school and reading were perfect opportunity to escape from oppressive reality. Benim icin okul ve okumak baskici gercekten kacmak icin mukemmel bir firsatti. My escape to school was strengthening my position against neglect in the family. Okula kacisim ailemdeki ihmale karsi benim durumumu guclendiriyordu. This is how I could resist their abuses. Iste bu sayede baskilara direniyordum.

Then my step mother sneakily punched to break my nose flowing blood like river and threatened to kill me by putting worms into my nose when I sleep. Ondan sonra uvey annem sinsice burnuma yumruk atarak kirdi ve dere gibi kanimi akitti ve ben uyurken burnuma solucan koyarak beni oldurmekle tehdit etti. Here: Burda: http://gundem.milliyet.com.tr/13-yasindaki-cocugun-bogazindan/gundem/detay/1774495/default.htm

I still have that broken bone in my nose from my stepmother’s punch and my father told me many times l needed a surgery to fix it when l reached 15 years old as it is still blocking my airway during my sleep therefore causing me breathing issues and snoring. Uvey annemin yumrugundan kalan kirik kemik halen benim burnumda duruyor ve bu kirik kemik nefes alma ve horlama sorunlari yarattigi icin babam bircok kere bu kemigi almak icin 15 yasina gelince ameliyat olmam gerektigini soyledi.

But of course my father did not care about broken nose bone when I was 15 as he did not even take me hospital when l crashed my head seriously by diving into a rock at the bottom of the brook. Fakat tabi babam ben dereye daldigim zaman dipteki kayaya basimi carpip ciddi sekilde yaralandigim zaman beni hastaneye goturmedigi gibi 15 yasima gelince kirik burun kemigini de bosverdi. My young neighbor friend Yakup Sofu was there in shock watching me how I survived with my crashed head. Komsumuzun oglu genc arkadasim Yakup Sofu benim derede kafam kirildiginda nasil olup ta sag kaldigimi saskinlikla seyretti.

Even though my grandfather Osman Cavus lived in his winter house in the Kuyumcullu village square they forced me and my siblings to walk two hours everyday to our new house in Salikkaya in all kinds of weather to go to elementary school.Osman Cavus dedem Kuyumcullu koy merkezinde kislik evinde durmasina ragmen beni ve kardeslerimi ilkokula gitmek icin her turlu hava kosullarinda iki saatlik yol yurumeye mecbur ettiler.

But as soon as my stepbrother Murat Iskender came to school age my father moved from Salikkaya to Kuyumcullu village center so that Murat does not have to walk same roads. Fakat uvey kardesim Murat okul yasina geldigi zaman bizim yurudugumuz yollari yurumesin diye babam Salikkaya’dan Kuyumcullu’ya tasindi.

CHAPTER 8 MY MIDDLE SCHOOL YEARS : BOLUM 8 ORTAOKUL YILLARIM

When I graduated elementary school from Kuyumcullu school with special recommendation letter written by the principle to my father urging him to continue my education but my father did not care as usual to use that recommendation letter to register me to a boarding school in Istanbul. Ilkokuldan mudurun beni okutmasi icin babama yazdigi ozel tavsiye mektubu ile mezun oldum fakat babam herzamanki gibi beni bu tavsiye mektubu ile alip Istanbul’daki parasiz yatili okullara goturmedi. Instead he sent me to Kocaali middle school. Aksine beni Kocaali Ortaokulu’na yolladi.

I had to walk four hours everyday from Salikkaya to Kocaali and starve all day . Hergun Salikkaya’dan Kocaali’ye dort saat yol yuruyorduk ve ben ac kaliyordum. Like some of my school friends stayed with their relatives in Kocaali l also stayed with my mother’s sister Hayriye Ak . Akrabalarinin yaninda kalan bazi ogrenciler gibi ben de annemin kardesi Hayriye Ak teyzemin yaninda kalmaya basladim. But my father did not like this and told me that my aunt Hayriye Ak was so mean grabbing all the money from my maternal grandparents and blocking them to give money to my father therefore causing my starvation etc and he ordered me not to see her again. Fakat babam bundan hoslanmadi ve Hayriye teyzemin cok kotu bir insan oldugunu ve dedemlerin butun parasini aldigini, babama para vermesini engelledeklerini, bu yuzden benim ac kalmama sebep olduklarini soyleyerek onu bir daha gormememi emretti.

So l restarted my hours of walking and starving days for three years. Boylece uc yil suren saatlerce suren yuruyus ve aclik gunlerime geri dondum. Those long walking days were usually lonely because my step mother would prevent me to join other students by manipulating my preparation in the morning. Bu uzun yuruyuslerimde genellikle yalnizdim cunku uvey annem sabah hazirligimi manipule ettiginden oteki ogrencilere katilamiyordum. My father and step mother never ever gave me a single slice of bread for my lunch for these three years! Babam ve uvey annem bu uc yillik Orta okul zamaninda bana ogle yemegi icin bir dilim ekmek bile vermediler.

Like it was not enough that they prevented me going to my aunt Hayriye Ak they did not even spare a single slice of bread for the lunch break. Teyzemin yanina gitmemi engelledikleri yetmiyormus gibi oglen paydosu icin benden bir dilim ekmegi bile esirgediler. They continued brainwashing me against my caring aunt and maternal grandmother. Sevecen teyzeme ve anneanneme karsi benim beynimi yikadilar.

CHAPTER 9 I WAS BEATEN FOR MY DIRTY CLOTHS BY KORAN COURSE TEACHER: BOLUM 9 KIRLI GIYSILERIM YUZUNDEN KURAN KURSU HOCASINDAN DAYAK YEDIM

This couple did not change since summer mosque school in one hour walk in the old Salikkaya where I used to visit my mother living with my grandmother. Bir saatlik yolda eski Salikkaya’da cami kursuna giderken anneannemle kalan annemi gormeye gittigim zamanki gunlerden beri bu ikili hic degismemisti. This couple never ever gave me even a slice of bread for the lunch break and beat me up for visiting my mother and grandmother for love and lunch! Bu cift bana asla ve kata ogle paydosu icin bir dilim bile ekmek vermedi ve ogle yemegi ve sevgi icin annemi ve anneannemi ziyaret ettigim icin beni dovduler.

This couple sent me to mosque all stinking in some torn and dirty cloths to get me penalized by the Koran teacher who was imam at the mosque. Bu cift Cami hocasinin beni cezalandirmasi icin pis korkan kirli ve paramparca giysilerle okula cami kursuna yolladi. This mosque teacher imam finally scolded and beat me up one morning for coming to mosque with stinking dirty and torn cloths and sent me back home. Bu cami hocasi hep pis kokan kirli ve paramparca giysilerle geldigim icin en sonunda bir sabah beni herkesin icinde azarlayip dovdukten sonra geri yolladi.

l went to my mother and grand mother to get a relief from my painful misery. Acili sefaletimden biraz kurtulmak icin anneannemin yanina gittim. My grand mother told me that even though our house belongs to my mother as her father paid all the money for it my mother cannot enter in our house and again even my mother’s father paid all the money for that mosque and the roads of old Salikkaya l cannot walk proudly on the same roads and cannot enter in the same mosque because of my father! Anneannem bana babamin yuzunden evimizin butun parasini annemin babasinin vermesine ragmen annemin bizi gormek icin evimize adim atamadigini ve ayni sekilde eski Salikkaya camisinin ve yollarinin parasini annemin babasinin verdigini ama buna ragmen babam yuzunden ne camiye ne de yollara gururla gidemedigimi anlatip agladi.

My father made my mother have nervous breakdown by getting me fall down in lime pit and go painfully blind for one year and tying me to a tree with pants full of feces and then brought in an abusive step mother and stole my mother’s house for eight years never allowing her to stay with her children and let my mother move in her house only after he moved out to get closer to school for my step brother but never let any of my siblings live with my mother. Babam beni kirec kuyusuna dusurerek ve bir yil korkunc acilarla dolu bir korluk yasatarak ve pantolonum diski dolu vaziyette beni agaclara baglayarak ve yalvaran anneme eziyetler ederek annemi sinir hastasi yapti ve iskenceci bir uvey anne getirip annemin ozmali olan evine tam sekiz yil haksizca el koydu ve annemin alti cocugunu gormesine hic izin vermedi ve ancak uvey kardesim icin okula daha yakin olmak amaciyla evden cikinca annemin kendi evine yerlesmesine musaade etti fakat alti cocugunun gelip annemle yasamasina asla musaade etmedi.

CHAPTER 10 THE REASON WHY MY FATHER DIDNOT DIVORCE MY MOTHER: BOLUM 10 BABAMIN ANNEMI BOSAMAMA NEDENI

My father never divorced my mother in order to keep my mother and her house always ready if my step mother run away. Babam, uvey annemin evden kacmasi halinde annemi ve evini herzaman hazir tutabilmek icin annemi hic bosamadi. My father knew that if he divorced my mother he would lose my mother and her house and her children forever and he would have no chance of fighting us and my siblings would easily take over all the fields with the help from my maternal grandparents and then my step mother would run away from my father too like she run away from her first husband while he was in his military service and emigrate to Germany or Australia with help from her brothers. Babam eger annemi bosarsa annemi, oturdugumuz annemin evini ve bizi ebediyyen kaybedecegini ve alti cocuga karsi direnemeyecegini ve dedemin de yardimiyla bizim butun yerleri alacagimizi ve o zaman uvey annemin aynen askerligini yaparken biraktigi ilk kocasi gibi kendisini de yuzustu birakip abisinin yanina Almanyaya kacacagini cok iyi biliyordu.

If my father divorced my mother he had to vacate my mother’s house or pay back the grant he took from my grandfather. Babam eger annemi bosasaydi annemin evini bosaltmak veya dedemin ev icin verdigi parayi geri iade etmek zorunda kalacakti. If he showed open hostility by divorcing and vacating the house he knew he had no chance against six children. Evi bosaltip bize acikca dusmanlik gosterirse alti cocuga karsi tekbasina hicbir sansi olmadigini cok iyi biliyordu.

When I was 13 l found my father’s Beratta handgun under his bed and began secretly practicing sharp shooting. 13 yasimdayken babamin Beratta marka tabancasini yataginin altinda buldum ve gizlice nisan talimlerine basladim. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beretta_Cheetah My father’s main handgun was licensed Parabellum pistol and he kept this Beratta pistol as spare one so l finished two boxes of rounds until he noticed it. Babamin esas tabancasi ruhsatli Barabeli marka tabancasi idi ve bu Berattayi yedekte tuttugu icin olayin farkina varana kadar ben iki kutu mermiyi bitirmistim bile. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pistol_Parabellum

One day as l heard noise in the back outside our house l noticed that lame Ahmet Ak was assaulting poor yellow and shoving him into our thorny bush by roadside so l grabbed the Beratta and run outside close to the fight and fired two shots in the air. Bir gun evimizin arkasinda bir gurultu duydum ve topal Ahmet Ak’in zavalli Sari’yi dovdugunu ve yolun kiyisindaki dikenli ormana soktugunu fark ettim ve Beratta tabancayi kaptim ve disari kosup kavganin yanina gelerek havaya iki el ates ettim.

Lame Ahmet immediately stopped assaulting poor Sari and run away without saying anything. Topal Ahmet Ak aninda Sari’yi dovmeyi birakti ve hicbirsey soylemeden kosup kacti.

Years later a young man came to me in the Kuyumcullu village and said he was really grateful that I saved his father Sari from lame Ahmet Ak. Yillar sonra Kuyumculu koyunde genc biradam bana geldi ve Sari’inin oglu oldugunu ve babasini topal Ahmet Ak’tan kurtardigim icin cok minnettar oldugunu soyledi.

My father and step mother started to be afraid as they saw l can use the handgun like this and start calling me insane. Babam ve uvey annem benim boyle tabanca kullandigimi gorunce korkmaya ve beni deli diye cagirmaya basladilar. My father repeated all my life that even if l become a governor l cannot be his man. Babam hayatim boyunca vali olsam bile adam olamayacagimi tekrarladi durdu. My step mother repeated all my life that one who has a dead will cry only one day but one who has insane cries all his/her life. Uvey annem butun hayatim boyunca olusu olanin bir gun aglayacagini fakat delisi olanin her gun aglayacagini tekrar edip durdu.

They treated me like an unwanted child, like a bastard and therefore prevented me to use any right in the life. Bana bir pic gibi, istenmeyen cocuk gibi davrandilar ve dolayisiyla hayatta herturlu hakki kullanmami engellediler. They illegitimized and bastardized me totally. Beni gayrimesrulastirdilar ve piclestirdier. They made me like Black Sea small violin player bastard Picoglu Osman. Beni, Kemence ordinaryusu picoglu Osman gibi yaptilar. Picoglu says he has nothing other than his small violin while l have nothing other than writing . Picoglu kemencesinden baska birseyi olmadigini soyluyor ben de yazmaktan baska bir seyim yok diyorum.

Picoglu Osman says his troubles cannot finish by writing and it is totally true for me. Picoglu Osman yazmakla dertlerim tukenmez diyor ve bu benim icin tumden gecerli. However l see all world is accelerating its speed to a total extinction too. Ancak ben butun dunyanin topyekun bir yok olmaya dogru hizlanarak gittigini goruyorum. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Picoğlu_Osman; http://cadde.milliyet.com.tr/2011/11/19/YazarDetay/1687298/Gezegen_elden_gidiyor__Buna_razi_gelemeyiz_

My father sent my mother to the field separating my mother from us and totally neglecting us to the extent neglecting me to fall in lime pit and causing me to live a painful blindness for a year and therefore with his cruelty caused my mother to attempt to commit suicide and totally ban her living with us in her own property house until her six children grown up! Babam, annemi cocuklarindan ayirip zorla tarlada calismaya goturdu ve bizi tamamen ihmal ettigi icin benim kirec kuyusuna dusmeme ve bir yil acilar icinde kor yasamama sebep olmus ve vahsetiyle annemin intihara tesebbus etmesine neden olmus ve annemin kendi mulku olan evinde alti cocuguyla yasamasina cocuklar buyuyunceye kadar engel olmustur. My father stole my mother’s health, her children and her house and forced us to live all pains of discrimination in the hands of a step mother. Babam, annemin sagligini, cocuklarini ve evini calmis ve bize de uvey anne elinde herturlu ayrimcilik acisini yasatmistir.

CHAPTER 11 ALLAH ALMIGHTY WARNED MY FATHER AND UNCLE: BOLUM 11 YUCE ALLAH BABAMI VE AMCAMI UYARDI

My father pretends he is pious in order to cover his real personality however he cannot pay for what he did to my mother and us according to Islam . Babam gercek kisiligini ortmek icin dindarlik pozlarina girmis ancak Islama gore anneme ve bize yaptiklarini odeyebilmesi mumkun degildir. Here: Burda: http://www.ahmetsahin.org/makaledetay.asp?id=1055

My father became sick due to his back pains and lied alone in the bed in the guest room for months. Babam bel agrilarindan dolayi yataga dustu ve misafir odasindaki yatakta aylarca yalniz yatti. I was in the last year of my elementary school. Ilkokul son sinifta gidiyordum. Even in his crippled situation my father continued to keep my mother away from her own property house and did not allow her be with her six children. Babam bu koturum halindeyken bile annemi kendi mulku olan evine sokmadi ve alti cocugu ile
beraber olmasina izin vermedi.

My father’s younger brother Suleyman Iskender was being his hitman to beat my mother. Babamin kucuk kardesi Suleyman Iskender babamin tetikcisi olarak annemi dovuyordu. Uncle Suleyman Iskender enjoyed a lot torturing me too. Suleyman Iskender amcam bana iskence etmekten de cok zevk alirdi.

Uncle Suleyman Iskender’s most favorite torture was hanging me from my ears with his hands until they bleed and threatening me by nailing my ears to wall and hanging me from my genitals to ceiling. Suleyman Iskender amcamin en zevk aldigi iskence elleriyle beni kulaklarimdan kanatana kadar asmak ve beni kulaklarimdan duvara civilemek ve cinsel organimdan tavana asmakla korkutmakti.

Uncle Suleyman was known as very strong man and shed tears as l beat him in the wrist wrestling years later. Suleyman amcam cok kuvvetli bir adam olarak bilinirdi ve yillar sonra kendisini bilek guresinde yendigim zaman gozlerinden yas akmisti.

It was very strange that I never felt sorry for my father in his sick bed and l even wished he dies and this all pain stops. Cok acayitir ama hasta yataginda olan babam icin hic uzuntu duymadim ve hatta olmesini ve butun bu acinin sona ermesini istedim. After he saved himself from the bed he still continued to complain about his back pains. Kendini yatakta. Kurtardiktan sonra yine bel agrilarindan sikayet etmeye devam etti. He also got stomach ulcer problem. Mide ulsteri sorunu da vardi. I always believed Allah Almighty is warning him for his crimes. Her zaman Yuce Allahin suclarindan dolayi onu uyardigina inandim. As he never righted his wrongs I decided to write them in here. Yanlislarini hic duzeltmedigi icin onlari burda yazmaya karar verdim.

When l was playing with the swing set it hit uncle Suleyman Iskender’s daughter Serpil’s face accidentally and injured her. Salincakta salanirken kazayla salincak Suleyman Amcamin kizi Serpil’in yuzune vurup yaraladi. Uncle Suleyman and his wife never let this go and beat and insulted me many times for this accident. Suleyman amcam ve karisi Fadime yengem bu kazadan dolayi beni hic affetmediler ve bircok kez dovup hakaret ettiler.

It was okey uncle Suleyman to beat my mother and tear my ears to bleed intentionally but my accidental hit to his daughter was never acceptable and seen as my deliberate reaction to his torture to me . Suleyman amcamin annemi dovmesi ve kulaklarimi kanatincaya kadar bilerek asilmasi iyiydi ama benim kazayla onun kizina vurmam kabul edilemez birseydi ve bana yaptigi kasti iskenceye bir inadina yaptigim karsilik olarak goruldu.

Uncle Suleyman called me insane for this. Suleyman amcam bunun icin beni deli diye cagirdi. Uncle Suleyman used me as a slave in his fields and in planting and watering vegetables for years in old Salikkaya on top of all this torture. Butun bu iskencenin ustune Suleyman amcam beni her isinde calistirdi ve eski Salikkaya’da sebze dikme ve sulama islerinde beni kole gibi kullandi. They used me as a free child slave but never saw me as part of their family. Beni bedava cocuk kole olarak kullandilar ama beni hic bir zaman ailenin bir verdi gibi gormediler.

For years Uncle Suleyman also used me as security in her house when he was away in the tea houses in Kuyumcullu village. Suleyman amcam Kuyumculluya kahveye gittigi zaman beni yillarca evinde guvenlik elemani olarak kullanirdi. Uncle Suleyman had many daughters but never had a son so he used me to feel safe. Suleyman amcamin hic oglu olmadi fakat bircok kizi oldu ve daha guvenli hissettigi icin beni kullandi.

l witnessed Uncle Suleyman with a huge ax in his hand chasing aunt Mumine’s husband Ruhi Ozmen in the Kuyumcullu square. Suleyman amcami Kuyumcullu carsisinda elinde buyuk bir baltayla Mumine halamin kocasi Ruhi Ozmen’i kovaladigina sahit oldum. Uncle Suleyman run into my grandfather’s winter house in the Kuyumcullu square and grabbed a big ax and run out like a raging bull and l run outside after him to see what is going on. Suleyman amcam dedemin Kuyumcullu meydanindaki kislik evine kosarak girdi ve baltayi kapip disari firlayinca ben de pesinden kosup ne oldugunu gormek icin ciktim.

Strange enough Ruhi Ozmen was extremely friendly to me and many times he came to our house in new Salikkaya and secretly called me to go with him while he was hiding behind the hazelnuts bushes. Ruhi Ozmen enistem bana karsi asiri derecede arkadasca davraniyor ve bircok kere yeni Salikaya’daki evimize gizlice gelip findik ocaklarinin arkasina saklaniyor ve beni yanina gitmem icin cagiriyordu. Ruhi Ozmen took me to uncle Suleyman’s house all the time and handing his pistol to me to boost my courage and sent me in the house to see if uncle Suleyman was in the house. Ruhi enistem herzaman beni Suleyman amcamin evine goturuyor ve bana tabancasini verip cesaretlendiriyor sonra da beni amcamin evde olup olmadigin anlamam icin eve casus olarak yolluyordu.

I thought doing something secret involving a gun against uncle Suleyman was so exciting. Suleyman amcama karsi icinde tabancanin da oldugu gizli bir is yapmayi
cok heyecanli buluyordum.When l told him how horrible my uncle Suleyman tortures me Ruhi Ozmen showed his shiny silver color handgun and let me hold it to boost my spirit against my torturer uncle Suleyman. Ruhi Ozmen enisteme Suleyman amcamin bana nasil iskence yaptigini anlatinca Ruhi enistem gumus renkli tabancasini cikarip gosterdi ve iskencecim Suleyman amcama karsi moralimi yukseltmek icin tabancasini bana verdi.

I did great job checking on uncle Suleyman and watching for him around the house. Suleyman amcamin evde olup olmadigini kontrol etmek ve eve gelip gelip gelmedigini gozetleyerek iyi is yaptim. I called uncle Suleyman’s wife Fadime out and ask her if she could spare a little food and while eating asked about uncle Suleyman. Suleyman amcamin karisi Fadime yengemi disari cagirdim ve bana biraz yemek vermesini istedim ve yemegi yerken Suleyman amcamin nerde oldugunu sorup ogrendim.

Another big supporter of my father was Iskender Iskender. Babamin oteki en buyuk destekcisi Iskender Iskender idi. Iskender Iskender was so close to my father like they spent sometime everyday together. Iskender Iskender babama o kadar yakindi ki hergun beraberdiler. Iskender Iskender was a little older than my father and acting like his adviser. Iskender Iskender babamdan biraz daha yasliydi ve babamin akil hocasi gibi hareket ediyordu.

My father was totally blessed by Iskender Iskender for creating the hell my mother and l lived through. Babam annemi ve beni icinde yasattigi cehennemi yaratmakta Iskender Iskender tarafindan tamamen kutsanmisti. While Iskender Iskender preached me to fight communism with pen not with fist he himself was practicing contrary the violence by beating his own son Hakki Iskender right in front of my eyes and dearly supporting my father’s violence on my mother and on me. Iskender Iskender bana komunizme karsi yumrukla degil kalemle mucadele et diye akil verirken kendisi gozlerimin onunde oglu Hakki Iskender’i doverek tam aksine siddet uyguluyordu ve babamin ve Sueyman amcamin da annem ve benim uzerinde uyguladigi siddeti candan destekliyordu.

One night I was on the roof fixing tv antenna on the roof I heard my father and Iskender Iskender on the road side agreed on violence on me as they both agreed that l was totally undesirable child even though I was top student in the middle school . Bir gun tavanda tv antenini ayarlarken yolda babamla Iskender Iskender’in ortaokulda cok basarili ogrenci olmama ragmen tamamen istenmeyen bir cocuk oldugum ve uzerimde siddet uygulanmasi konusunda fikir birligine vardiklarini duydum. I stole and drove Iskender Iskender’s car when he walked with my father to the field all the way to old Salikkaya to punish these two. Bu ikiliyi cezalandirmak icin Iskender Iskender’in babamla beraber bizim tarlaya gittigi bir zamanda Iskender Iskender’in arabasini aldim ve eski Salikkaya’ya surdum. Allah Almighty sent a warning to them by enabling me to take away their most precious property. Yuce Allah onlarin en kiymet verdigi seyi bana alip goturterek onlara bir uyarida bulundu.

CHAPTER 12 MY FATHER PROVOKES ME AGAINST ALLAH THE ALMIGHTY AND MY MOTHER: BOLUM 12 BABAM BENI ALLAHA VE ANNEME KARSI KISKIRTIYOR

My father brainwashed me and put big hate against my mother which poisoned all my heart and made me a sick hater against my surrounding namely my father and mother. Babam beynimi yikayarak anneme karsi kalbime buyuk bir nefret koydu ancak bu nefret butun kalbimi zehirledi ve boylece beni basta babam ve annem olmak uzere cevremden nefret eden bir insan yapti. I hated or mistrusted or did not know how to trust my siblings and people in the house and in the village and in the school too. Kendi kardeslerime, evdeki, koydeki ve okuldaki cevreme karsi nefret veya guvensizlik duygusu besledim veya guvenmeyi beceremedim.

Probably my all family suffered same feelings too. Mumkundur ki tum ailem de ayni duygulardan muzdaripti. While l was going to elementary and middle school l was a loner and did not know how to trust my school mates. Ilk ve orta okula giderken okul arkadaslarima nasil guvenecegimi bilemiyordum.

My middle school mates from yeni Salikkaya included Iskender Iskender’s sons Omer and his younger brother Ibrahim. Yeni Salikkaya’dan Kocaali Ortaokulu’na yurume giden gruba Iskender Iskender’in iki oglu Omer ve kucuk kardesi Ibrahim de dahildi. I had that mistrust to them as their father Iskender Iskender was my father’s best friend and adviser. Babalari Iskender Iskender benim babamin eniyi arkadasi ve akil hocasi oldugu icin onlara karsi bir guvensizlik duygusu tasiyordum.

Other two fellow students were Ahmet Iskender and his younger brother Mehmet Iskender. Diger iki ortaokul arkadasi Ahmet Iskender ve kucuk kardesi Mehmet Iskender idi. Ahmet and Mehmet’s mother Zehra Iskender was very friendly with my terrible step mother Hayriye Ozturk and acting as her security whenever my mother comes to visit us while my father is not home . Ahmet ve Mehmet’in anneleri Zehra Iskender korkunc uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk ile cok yakin dosttu ve annem bizi gormeye geldigi zaman eger babam evde degilse Zehra yenge uvey annemin korumasi gibi hareket ediyordu.

My stepmother would send my elder sister Nezahat with one of my siblings and bring Zehra to beat my mother in her own property trying to be with her own six children and Zehra would even send her husband Niyazi Iskender or his brothers Suleyman or Sadik Iskender to call my father to beat my poor mother. Uvey annem ablam Nezahat Iskender’i kardeslerimden birisiyle komsumuz Zehra Iskender’i cagirmaya yollar ve Zehra ile bir olup alti cocugunu kendi mali olan evinde gormek ve bakmaktan baska birsey istemeyen annemi doverler ve icabinda Babama da dovdurmek icin Zehra yenge babami cagirmaya kocasi Niyazi Iskender’i veya o yoksa Niyazi’nin kardesleri Suleyman veya Sadik’i yollardi.

Therefore I had this mistrust to Ahmet and Mehmet too. Bu nedenle Ahmet ve Mehmet’e karsi bu guvensizlige sahiptim. Another fellow middle school student was Hasan Ak but his father Mehmet Ak’s mother was my torturer uncle Suleyman Iskender’s wife Fadime’s elder sister and she was main perpetrator provoking my father to find second wife. Diger ortaokul arkadasi Hasan Ak idi fakat onun babasi olan Mehmet Ak’in annesi de benim iskencecim olan Suleyman Iskender amcamin karisi Fadimenin ablasiydi ve ikinci es bulma sucunda babamin bas kiskirticisi olmustu.

This woman was not able to find a second wife to her own son Mehmet Ak as his wife Fikriye who was Hasan Ak’s mother was also depressed and having nervous breakdown and I think her failure to find another wife to her own son was very good. Bu kadin nedense kendi oglu Mehmet’in karisi yani Hasan Ak’in annesi Fikriye yenge depresyona girip sinir kirizi gecirince ogluna ikinci es bulamamisti ve bence bu basarisizligi da cok iyi olmustu.

Another fellow middle school student was Osman Aydinoglu whose father was away in Istanbul most times. Diger ortaokul arkadasi da babasi cogu zaman Istanbul’da calisan Osman Aydinoglu idi. Osman’s father is Iskender Iskender’s wife’s brother and I felt similar mistrust to him too.. Osman’in babasi da Iskender Iskender’in karisi ile kardes oldugundan ona da benzer bir guvensizlik duyuyordum.

Moreover all parents of these fellow middle school students were showing great respect and love to my grandfather Osman Cavus. Ustelik butun ortaokul arkadaslarimin anne ve babalari Osman Cavus dedeme karsi buyuk bir saygi ve sevgi gosteriyorlardi. Even worse was when I had my first wet dream when l was in the middle school and went to the brook to wash myself secretly according to Islamic ritual however l could not avoid my urge to masturbate in the middle of the water first time in my life and then l did my cleaning ritual peacefully. Daha da kotusu orta okuldayken hayatimda ilk kez uyurken cinsel ruya gormustum ve islami kurallara gore gizlice gusul abdesti almak icin dereye gittim ancak kendimi tutamadigim icin suyun ortasinda hayatimda ilk kez masturbasyon yaptim ve sonra huzurlu bir sekilde gusul abdestimi aldim.

But while I was still in the water a woman called my name Recai from over the bank under the hazelnuts trees which really caused great shame to me as l was not supposed to be masturbating at all let alone to be seen like this according to my faith. Fakat ben hala suyun icindeyken derenin hemen kiyisinda findik agaclarinin tam altinda bir kadinin Recai dedigini duydum ve gercekten buyuk bir utanc duydum cunku inancima gore boyle gorulmeyi birakin masturbasyon da yapmamam gerekiyordu.

While l was worried about burning in the hells for eternity l realized she was Osman Aydinoglu’s mother asking me what l am doing naked in the water. Sonsuza kadar cehennemlerde yanmaktan korkarken suyun icinde ciplak ne yaptigimi soran bu kadinin Osman Aydinoglu’nun annesi oldugunu farkettim. So she turned my most peaceful sin into a greatest fear of hell and shame. Boylece bu kadin benim en huzurlu gunahimi en buyuk cehennem korkusuna ve utanca cevirdi. Therefore I could not trust Osman a bit too. Iste bu nedenle Osmana da hic guvenemiyordum.

I was doomed to be a lone boy. Yalniz bir genc olmaya mahkumdum. Even more disturbing was when l was in the first year of the elementary school l was scolded by my paternal grandmother for calling a bad nickname for my classmate Halis Iskender who was so friendly to invite me his house to eat meals and study everyday when l used to live with my paternal grand father Osman Cavus in his winter house in Kuyumcullu. Daha da rahatsiz edici olan da ben ilkokul birinci sinifinda Osman Cavus dedemin Kuyumcullu’daki kislik evinde kalirken beni hergun evlerine yemek yemege ve ders calismaya goturen bana cok dost Halis Iskender’e kotu bir isim takip cagirdigim icin baba annemin beni usulca azarlamasiydi. I called my best friend as thick head sounding like “gotgot”! En iyi arkadasim Mithat Iskender’in oglu Halis Iskender’i kalin kafali, kafasi kalin kut kut ses cikaran birsey anlaminda gotgot diye cagirmistim. I was so self destructive child due to poison filled in my heart by my father to hate my mother. Annemden nefret etmem icin babamin kalbime doldurdugu zehir nedeniyle iste boyle kendi kendine zarar veren bir cocuktum.

Hate poison planted in me by father’s destroyed my hearth and forced me to be a helpless and hopeless child against Allah the Almighty and people surrounding me! Babamin icime ektigi nefret zehiri kalbimi mahvetti ve beni Yuce Allah’a ve cevremdeki insanlara beni caresiz ve umutsuz bir cocuk olmaya zorladi.

One day old Salikkaya youth came to our new Salikkaya and challenged us at our home. Bir gun eski Salikkaya gencleri yeni Salikkaya’ya gelip bizi kendi evimizde tehdit ettiler. Old Salikkaya population was at least two times more crowded. Eski Salikkaya nufusu en azindan iki misli kalabalikti. Standing up against them was not so easy! Onlara karsi durmak oyle kolay degildi.

Their leading guy was Mustafa Ak. Onlarin lideri Mustafa Ak’ti. As I knew Mustafa’s mother’s younger sister was my torturer uncle Suleyman’s wife Fadime and his mother was the main perpetrator to provoke my father to bring my step mother in our house l grabbed a big stick and hid it behind me and jumped on Mustafa while he was overconfident as l was his half age and hit him in the face so badly that all his group was in shock and dispersed immediately. Mutafanin annesinin benim iskencecim olan Suleyman amcamin karisi Fadime yengemin ablasi oldugunu ve babami uvey annemi getirmesi icin kiskirttigini bildigim icin bir buyuk sopa alip arkama sakladim ve yasca benden iki kat buyuk oldugu icin kendine asiri guvenen Mustafanin ustune atlayip yuzune oyle sert sekilde vurdum ki Mustafanin grubu sok oldu ve aninda dagilip kacti.

I never informed anybody as I never trusted any body and risked my life just to punish my own and my mother’s torturers. Bana ve anneme iskence edenleri cezalandirmak icin asla hic kimseye guvenmedigimden hic kimseye haber vermeden hayatimi tehlikeye attim. This action also spread the rumor that l was insane. Bu hareket de deli oldugum dedikodusunu yaydi. The hate my father planted in me caused this insane justice attempt. Babamin icime ektigi nefret bu delice adalet girisimine sebep oldu.

When l met the same Mustafa Ak soon on the road very close to his brother Mehmet Ak’s house he chatted with me very friendly and suggested that l grow a mustache as it will suit me when he noticed some hairs growing on my lip. Ayni Mustafa Ak’a aradan cok gecmeden abisi Mehmet Ak’in evinin yakininda yolda raslayinca benimle dostca sohbet etti ve dudagimda cikan tuyleri gorunce bana yakisacagini soylerek biyik birakmami istedi. As in Turkish culture mustache is symbol of manhood and power Mustafa thought l deserved wearing mustache even when I was child. Turk kulturunde biyik erkeklik ve iktidar sembolu oldugu icin Mustafa ben daha cocukken biyik birakmayi hakettigimi dusunmustu. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moustache; http://cendam.blogcu.com/biyigin-tarihi-biyik-cesitleri/8690240#

But Mustafa’s elder brother Mehmet Ak hit and insulted me to take revenge for what I did to his brother Mustafa when I was with his son Hasan watching tv in their house . Fakat Mustafa’nin abisi olan Mehmet Ak Ben oglu Hasan ile evlerinde televizyon seyrederken kardesi Mustafanin intikamini benden almak icin bana hakaret edip vurdu. I complained Mehmet Ak to my father who also hit and insulted me for my complaint. Mehmet Ak’i yaptigindan dolayi babama sikayet ettim ama o da sikayetimden dolayi bana vurup hakaret etti. So I realized that I can never trust my father which planted more poison in me. Boylece babama asla guvenemeyecegimi farkettim bu da icime daha cok zehir ekti.

CHAPTER 13 THEY RIPPED MY SWEETHEART FROM ME: BOLUM 13 SEVDICEGIMI KOPARDILAR BENDEN

When l was in the last year of high school l loved a girl and got perfect reaction from her too. Lise son siniftayken bir kizi sevdim ve kizdan mukemmel karsilik aldim. While l was dating with my sweetheart everyday and seriously getting close to marriage stage my aunt Rahime Gobel’s son Salim Gobel said my paternal grandmother is calling me in her house to speak with me in an evening in late summer season. Ben her gun sevdigim kizla anlasip ciddi olarak evlilik asamasina yaklasirken yaz mevsimi sonunda bir aksam ustu Rahime Gobel halamin oglu Salim Gobel baba annemin beni konusmak icin evine cagirdigini soyledi.

Salim Gobel’s wife was close family member of my sweetheart and knew my dating very well. Salim Gobel’in karisi benim sevgilimin yakin akrabasi idi ve benim kizla anlastigimi cok yakindan biliyordu. I believe Salim arranged something bad against me and put my grand mother in it too. Salim’in bana karsi kotu bir sey ayarladigini ve icine baba annemi de soktuguna inaniyorum. Salim was always negative to me and made many bad moves against me. Salim bana karsi daima olumsuzdu ve bana karsi bazi kotu hareketler yapmisti.

When l went to see my grandmother l was expecting her to be my mother as l always missed one and encourage me for a marriage according our traditions. Baba annemi gormeye giderken hicbir zaman annem olmadigi icin onun bana annelik yaparak beni evlenmeye tesvik edip geleneklerimize gore kizi bana alacagini umuyordum. I was totally wrong! Tamamen yanilmisim! My grand mother said she knows how serious l am with my sweetheart exactly but my other aunt wanted to marry her son with the same girl. Baba annem benim sevgilimle ne kadar ciddi oldugumu cok iyi bildigini ancak oteki halamin sevdigim kizi ogluna almak istedigini soyledi.

I was in shock that my grand mother could even allow my aunt speak such a thing and open it to me. Baba annemin boyle bir seyi konusmasi icin halama izin verdigini ve bunu da bana acabildigini gorunce sok oldum. Instantly l realized that l had no chance of marriage as my only hope grand mother in the family openly violated all known customs that nobody separates two young people who love each other and agreed for marriage. Aile icindeki tek umudum olan baba annemin birbirini seven iki genc insanin arasina girilmemesini emreden bilinen butun yerlesmis gelenekleri acikca cignedigini gorunce evlilik icin hicbir sansimin olmadigini aninda anladim.

It was shockingly obvious that in my grandmother’s eyes the God’s order and prophet’s word to marry the loving youths was not valid for me but for those who did not speak and did not love each other!! Baba annemin gozunde Allahin emri ve peygamberin kavli ile seven gencleri evlendirmek benim icin degil tam tersine birbirleriyle hic konusmamis ve sevmemis olanlar icin gecerliydi!

In the meantime, l was totally certain my stepmother Hayriye Ozturk was certainly against my marriage as she always told me she will do everything to prevent me to marry from the beginning!Uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk en basindan beri evlenmemi engelleyecegini soyleyip durdugu icin zaten onun evlenmeme kesinlikle karsi oldugunu biliyordum.

My father and my grandfather were totally negative and so cheap to me they would not even buy a pair of pajamas and would not even give me a penny to cross the Bosphorus once when l started Haydarpasa Free Boarding school in Istanbul which was best school in Turkey and did not even send me to another one when I was expelled from high school for freedom of speech even though they built two apartment buildings in the village center! Babam ve dedem koyun ortasina iki apartman binasi dikmelerine ragmen bana karsi tamamen olumsuz ve oylesine cimriydiler ki Turkiye’nin ne iyi okulu olan Istanbul’daki Haydarpasa Lisesi’ne parasiz yatili girdigim zaman bana bir pijama bile almamislar ve Istanbul Bogazi’ni gecmem icin bir kurus bile vermemisler ve Karasu Lisesi’nde ifade ozgurlugumu kullandigim icin atildigim zaman beni baska bir okula bile yollamamislardi.

My father got free pajamas sewed by Ali Abali’s wife for free at the last minute as he did not want to pay for a ready pajamas or get it sewed by the professional male tailors in the village center for me. Babam benim icin hazir pijamaya veya koy carsisindaki erkek terzilere dikis parasi vermemek icin son dakikada Ali Abali’nin karisina bedavaya pijama diktirdi.

My grand mother was just following her old habit to neglect me by letting me to fall in the lime pit and suffer one year long blindness, by forcing me to live without my mother and with my pants full with feces tied to a tree by throwing me to step mother hell with bed wetting for years. Baba annem, beni kirec kuyusuna dusmeye ve bir yil korkunc aciyla kor yasamaya ve beni annesiz birakip yillarca diski dolu pantolonla agaca bagli yasamaya ve uvey anne cehenneminde yatagi islatarak korkunc bir hayat yasamaya mahkum eden eski huyunu surduruyordu.

I saw grand mother’s mean heart and told her “l will study college therefore cannot have marriage and you can get my sweetheart as you wish”. Baba annemin kotu niyetini gordugum icin ona “universitede okuyacagim, bu nedenle evlilik yapamayacagim ve sevdigim kizi istedigin gibi alabilirsin ” dedim. My words were like insane trash as nobody expected me to go to college after such turmoils within last three years. Gecen uc yil boyunca olan onca karmasadan sonra kimse benim universiteye gidecegimi ummadigim icin sozlerim bir deli sacmasi gibiydi. But still they loved it as I opened their way. Fakat yine de yollarini actigim icin hoslarina gitti.

My grand mother died within one year. Baba annem bir yil icinde olup gitti. I came from my college to join her funeral but never cried for her and my sister Nezahat Iskender said l was so heartless as l was not crying for my grand mother! Siyasal’dan gelip baba annemin cenazesine katildim fakat hic aglamadim ve ablam Nezhat Iskender baba annemin olumune aglamadigim icin cok kalpsiz oldugumu soyledi. My aunt’s son who married my sweetheart knowingly also died from cancer some years ago. Sevdigim kizla bile bile evlenen halamin oglu da birkac sene once kanserden oldu.

CHAPTER 14 TORTURE-LIKE LIFE DROVE ME INTO INSANE MASTURBATIONS: BOLUM 14 ISKENCE GIBI HAYAT BENI MANYAK MASTURBASYONLARA SURUKLEDI

On top of this horrible sinful dirty feeling from my mother l started strange masturbation habit in the Haydarpasa Free Boarding High School in Istanbul which made me even feel more sinful and therefore l strictly obeyed all the orders from my father. Annemle ilgili bu korkunc gunahkar kirlenmislik duygusunun ustune Istanbul’da Haydarpasa Parasiz Yatili Lisesi’nde okurken basladigim acayip maturbasyon aliskanligi beni daha cok gunahkarlik duygusuna itti ve babamin herturlu emrini harfiyen uyguladim. I was in a terrible situation after l prayed to get clean from my sins but then I could not hold myself to run to masturbate again and then repeat the vicious cycle all day.Cok feci bir durumdaydim yani gunahlarimin affolmasi icin namaz kildiktan sonra kendimi tutamiyor ve yeniden masturbasyona kosmaktan kendimi alikoyamiyordum ve boylece bu kisir dongu surup gidiyordu.

I was not supposed to pray without Islamic whole body washing ritually after masturbation but there was no showers available so l would do dry cleaning ritually by using a piece of roof tile as a cleaning tool as a remedy according to Islam in order to get forgiveness by praying. Masturbasyondan sonra boy abdesti almam gerekiyordu ama yikanma imkani olmadigi icin namaz kilarak kendimi affettirmek amaciyla islami kurallara gore bir kiremit parcasini temizlik aleti gibi kulanarak gusul (boy) abdesti aliyordum. This masturbation and prayer vicious cycle became a habit and I began to feel extremely sinful and dirty. Bu masturbasyon ve namaz kisir dongusu bir aliskanlik oldu ve ben son derece gunahkar ve kendi kendimi kirlenmis hissetmeye basladim.

I felt like l deserved to be burning in the deepest bottom of hell for eternity. Cehennem kuyusunun en dibinde sonsuza kadar kalmayi hakediyormus gibi hissediyordum kendimi. My situation was much worse than falling and dying in the burning lime pit by drowning in it or living with horrible pains as a total blind child for a year or growing years as tied up to a tree alone with pants full of feces and piss or watching my father beat and abuse my mother as she riot against these all my life or watching my mother attempting to commit suicide to escape from all my father’s abuses or my suffering all the abuses from my father and stepmother . Durumum sicak kirec kuyusuna dusup bogularak olmekten veya kurtulunca bir yil boyunca acilar icinde tumden kor yasamaktan veya pantolonum diski ve idrar dolu bir agaca bagli yillarca yalniz buyumekten veya babamin bunlara isyan eden annemi butun hayatim boyunca dovmesini seyretmekten veya annemin kurtulmak icin kendi canina kiymaya tesebbus etmesini seyretmekten veya babam ve uvey annem Hayriye Ozturkun bana onca eziyetleri yasatmasindan cok daha feciydi. Probably this was just a result of all abuses! Belki bu butun bu eziyetlerin sadece bir sonucuydu! Allah the Almighty was testing me in this difficulty. Yuce Allah beni bu zorlukta imtihan ediyordu.

Because hell is supposed to be all burning alive for eternity for me! Cunku cehennemde tamamen canli canli sonsuza kadar yanmak sozkonusuydu benim icin. I was so desperate to clean my sins! Gunahlarimi affettirmek icin yanip tutusiyordum. I did not have anything except my youth life to sacrifice. Kurban olarak sunmak icin genclik hayatimdan baska bir seyim yoktu. In order to escape my extreme shame of sinfulness l identified myself with my father followed my father’s political indoctrination to word by word as a child. Bir cocuk olarak asiri gunahkarlik utancindan kurtulabilmek icin babamin siyasi ogretisini harfiyen uygulamaya basladim.

As l never quit my prayers l devoted myself more fighting godless and oppressive communism to please my father, my state and Allah the Almighty . Namazlarimi asla birakmadim ve kendimi babami, devleti ve Yuce Allah’i memnun etmek icin allahsiz ve zalim komunizme karsi mucadeleye adadim. My full prayers continued until I left the Gulen group’s boarding house in college in the end of first year. Eksiksiz namazlarim Siyasal’da birinci yil sonunda Gulen Cemaati Grubu’nun ogrenci evlerinden ayrilana kadar surdu.

I quit full prayers in reaction to the efforts of the Fethullah Gulen group to suppress my question in my head instead of giving me good answers Fethullah Gulen Grubu’nun kafamdaki sorulara cevap vermek yerine beni susturmaya calismalarina tepki olarak namazdan sogudum. Probably they did not want to risk to put me in contact with more intellectual members to discuss freely. Belki daha serbest bir sekilde tartismak icin beni daha entellektuel uyeleri ile tanistirma riskiness girmek istemediler. It was only the first year of 1980 military coup d’états. 1980 Askeri Darbesinin daha birinci yiliydi. Actually no other group was allowed to operate like Gulen group then. Aslinda o zaman Gulen grubu gibi hicbir grubun faaliyetine izin verilmiyordu.

CHAPTER 15 I BECAME A RELIGIOUS GRAY WOLF: BOLUM 15 DINDAR BIR ULKUCU OLDUM

I was already praying full time in Haydarpasa High School Free Boarding before I even thought about becoming a gray wolf. Daha ulkucu olmayi dusunmeden once Haydarpasa Lisesi Parasiz Yatili’da namazlarimi tam kiliyordum. I found myself serving to global war on communism according to CIA propaganda and my father’s orders and could not see that secret Galdio of NATO created a false flag operation of a civil war between left and right. CIA propagandasina ve babamin emirlerine uygun olarak komunizme karsi kuresel savasa hizmet etmeye basladim ve NATO’nun gizli ordusu GLADYO’nun Turkiye’de sahte bir sag-sol savasi cikarttigini goremedim.

My father was a propaganda master like Hitler or CIA and brainwashed my mind and filled my heart with poison of hate against my mother and myself and anybody like my maternal grandparents, like maternal aunt Hayriye Ak, like neighbour Zekiye Iskender who criticized my father’s cruelty! Babam Hitler ve CIA gibi bir propagada ustasi olarak anneannem ve dedem, teyzem Hayriye Ak, komsumuz Zekiye Iskender teyze gibi acimasizligindan dolayi kendisini kinayan herkese ve anneme ve kendime karsi benim beynimi yikayarak kalbimi nefret zehiriyle doldurdu. Because my father poisoned even the most godly mother-child love l could not get satisfied even with full prayers to escape from his corruption in my mind so I was drawn to his poisonous teaching. Babam en ilahi ana-ogul sevgisini bile zehirledigi icin aklimi bozmasindan kacmak icin bes vakit namazlar bile beni kesmedi ve boylece babamin zehirli beyin yikamasina kapildim. But I know very well that he was also a victim of this NATO Gladio propaganda. Fakat babamin da NATO GLADYO’nun propagandasinin bir kurbani oldugunu cok iyi biliyorum.

My father Resat Iskender and step mother Hayriye Ozturk’s filling poison of hate against my mother in my heart corrupted all my struggles of love and care through my life and turned me into a lifetime protester against oppression. Babam Resat Iskender ve uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk’un anneme karsi kalbime doldurduklari nefret zehiri hayatim boyunca yaptigim sevgi ve baglanma cabalarimi bozup bosa cikardi ve beni hicbirseye guvenmeyen ve
zulme karsit bir insan haline getirdi. I was a full time prayer and anti-oppressive child who was manipulated to be a part in a wrong war of brothers. Bes vakit namazini kilan ve zulum karsiti bir genc olarak yanlis bir kardes kavgasinda taraf olmak icin kandirildim.

So l was used as hitman like my country Turkey was used as hitman against peoples in
the world .
Yani ulkem Turkiyenin dunyada halklara karsi tetikci olarak kullanilmasi gibi ben de tetikci olarak kullanildim. You will see similarity in how I was burned as the millions of peoples, animals and the earth are burned by illimunati’s Gladio. Dunyanin karanlik efendilerinin gizli ordusu Gladyo’nun beni yaktigi gibi milyarlarca masum insani, hayvanlari ve yeryuzunu benzer sekilde yaktigini goreceksiniz .

Dark masters of the world are working for a nuclear World War 3 and establish a global world state and impose a global martial law around the world.Dunyanin karanlik efendileri, nukleer bir ucuncu dunya savasi cikarmak ve tum dunyada kuresel devlet kurmak ve askeri sikiyonetim ilan etmek icin calisiyorlar. Actually CIA and its network run the world state for the secret masters. Gercekten CIA ve sebekesi gizli efendiler icin dunya devletini idare ediyor. Here: Burda: http://forum.prisonplanet.com/index.php?topic=20090.0 Here: Burda: http://www.serendipity.li/cia.html

Gladio means sword in Latin. Gladyo Latincede kilic demektir.Gladiator also comes from same root. Gladyator de ayni kokten gelir. CIA established secret armies of death squads around the world. CIA tum dunyada olum mangalarindan olusan gizli ordular kurdu.

This is also true for NATO countries too. Bu NATO ulkeleri icin de gecerlidir.
CIA controls the world with death squads. CIA dunyayi olum mangalariyla kontrol altina tutuyor. CIA: World’s biggest terrorist organization. CIA: Dunyanin en buyuk terorist orgutudur. Here: Burda: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CEfYgz0Amo4&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DCEfYgz0Amo4 NATO calls its secret black operation army Gladio. NATO gizli yasadisi olum ordularina Gladyo adini verdi. NATO countries were run by death squads against the will of peoples. NATO ulkeleri halklarin iradesine ragmen olum mangalariyla idare edildi.

They marketed this tragicomic truth as democracy. Bu trajikomik gercegi de demokrasi diye pazarladilar. Gladio is imperialist secret army formed by death squads. Gladyo olum mangalarindan olusan emperyalist gizli ordudur. Here: Burda: http://willyloman.wordpress.com/2013/01/19/american-gladio-part-1-it-is-an-ideology-not-a-conspiracy/

CHAPTER 16 TURKES WAS CIA AGENT: BOLUM 16 TURKES BIR CIA AJANIYDI

Like Zionism destroyed Ottoman Empire it also kept Turkey under constant control. Siyonizm Osmanli Imparatorlugunu yiktigindan gibi Turkiyeyi de surekli kontrolu altinda tuttu. Zionism always used domestic forces to do its bid in full coordination. Siyonizm isini girecek icerdeki gucleri tam bir esgudum icinde kullandi.

CIA established Gladio gray wolves commando youth organization in Turkey with the help of Alpaslan Turkes. CIA, Alpaslan Turkesin yardimiyla Turkiye’de
Gladyo ulkucu komando genclik teskilatini kurdu. Here: Burda:
http://blog.milliyet.com.tr/cia–ergenekon-ve-komando-kamplarindan-bugune—/Blog/?BlogNo=104428 CIA was using Turkes directly. CIA, Turkes’i dogrudan kullaniyordu. I was used by this paramilitary commando gray wolves thanks to my fascist racist father Resat Iskender. Fasist irkci babam Resat Iskender sagolsun bu fasist komando ulkuculer tarafindan kullanildim. Therefore I served to CIA as fascist commando gray wolf too unfortunately. Bu sekilde, CIA’ya maalesef bir ulkucu fasist komando olarak hizmet etmis oldum. I was given the medal for my fascist graywolf commando service to the CIA by getting fired from my career diplomat job in the Foreign Ministry by the CIA/Gladio elite undersecretary Ambassador Ozceri in 1989. CIA/Gladyo’ya ulkucu fasist komando olarak yaptigim bu hizmetimin karsiliginda CIA/Gladyo seckini Mustesar Buyukelci Ozceri
tarafindan 1989′da Disisleri Bakanligi meslek memurlugumdan atilarak hediyemi aldim. Here: Burda: http://gundem.milliyet.com.tr/-rocky-recai-diplomat-cikti-/gundem/gundemdetay/06.11.2011/1459777/default.htm. As you see from the news I was misrepresented as a student attacking the school principle whereas l was only using my freedom of speech writing my defense paper as a student against the principle. Haberde goruldugu gibi okul mudurune karsi sadece dusunce ozgurlugumu kulanarak yazili savunma verdigim halde sanki ona saldiran bir ogrenci olarak gercege aykiri sekilde tanitiliyorum. I am still misrepresented as hitman on the school principle after so many years. Bunca yildan sonra halen okul mudurune karsi bir tetikciymisim gibi yanlis tanitiliyorum. I hope to clear these lies with my autobiography. Otobiyografim ile bu yalanlari temizleyecegime inaniyorum. But CIA/Gladio worked hard since and used all Turkey as hitman against Iraq and Libya, now is using it against Syria. Fakat CIA/Gladyo o zamandan beri cok calisti
ve Turkiye’yi Irak’a, Libya’ya karsi tetikci olarak kullandi ve simdi de Suriyeye karsi kullaniyor. Gladio Undersecretary Ozceri at the Foreign Ministry of Turkey made everything to destroy Irak. Turkiye Disisleri Bakanliginda Gladyo Mustesari Ozceri Irak’i mahvetmek icin
gereken herseyi yapti. Next is Iran involving nuclear Israel. Sirada Israil’in ve Amerika’nin saldirmayi planladigi Iran var. Then an ethnic civil war is coming. Sonra etnik bir buyuk savas geliyor.That will be world war 3. Bu 3.cu
Dunya Savasi olacak. Millions will die and global dollar economy will collapse. Milyonlarca insan olecek ve dolara dayanan kuresel ekonomi cokecek. Naturally as people starve, super riots will break out and Gladio will establish global military martial law over the
world under the guise of controlling these super riots.
Dogal olarak insanlar ac kalinca super isyanlar patlayacak ve Gladyo bunlari bastirmak bahanesiyle askeri sikiyonetim kurarak butun dunyaya hakim olacak. As you see all mankind is blacklisted already! Gordugunuz gibi butun dunya coktan mimlenmis. However one world state will disappear because of new Internet. Ancak yeni Internet nedeniyle tek dunya devleti silinecek. State concept will be gone forever! Devlet kavrami ebediyyen kaybolacak! In the new Internet age activists like Bradley Manning and Edward Snowden will be able to steal all the secret info to the last bit daily and spread it to billions of people around the world on a daily basis. Yeni Internet caginda Bradley Manning and Edward Snowden gibi eylemciler hergun butun gizli bilgileri son kirintisina kadar calacak ve tum
dunyadaki milyarlarca kullaniciya gunluk olarak yayacak. Here: Burda: http://www.defenseone.com/ideas/2013/07/goodbye-anti-war-hello-anti-secrecy/67139/ New internet age will be advanced livestream! Yeni internet cagi ileri canli yayin teknolojisine dayanacak. Mankind will transform from warmongering hitman culture into all sharing and caring communitarian culture. Insanlik savas cigirtkani tetikci kulturunden herseyi paylasan ve birbirini seven bir kuresel paylasimci ortaklasaci toplum kulturune donusecek. We will find ways to stop all cruelty on each other, on animals and nature. Biz birbirimize karsi, hayvanlara karsi, dogaya karsi vahsilik yapmaya son verecegiz. New internet will empower people against state secrecy, violence and corruption beyond imagination. Yeni Internet halki, devletin gizliligine, siddetine ve yozluguna karsi hayalin otesinde guclendirecek. State wants total control and does not allow privacy of personal communication at all. Devlet topyekun kontrol istiyor ve ozel haberlesmenin gizliligine izin vermiyor. Here: Burda :
http://blog.patternbuilders.com/2013/07/19/privacy-v-security-transparency-v-secrecy-nsa-prism-others/ Internet will work in the same way on state secrecy and will eliminate state concept with its secrecy. Internet de devlet sirlari uzerinde ayni sekilde isleyecek ve
sirlariyla birlikte devlet kavramini da ortadan kaldiracak. Once public has totally unlimited access to unlimited super-livestreaming every bit of public space as 24/7 around the
world everybody will know what is going on instantly around the world freely
. Halk tum dunyada 24/7 hergun her saniye kamuya acik alanlarda yapilan sinirsiz super canli yayina
erisim imkanina tumden kavusunca dunyada olup biteni aninda bedavadan ogrenecek. It will be human right like air. Bu hava gibi insan hakki olacak. Once the state concept is eliminated all hierarchy will be eliminated in the worl. Birkere devlet kavrami ortadan kalkinca dunyadaki tum hiyerarsi kalkacak. No man will be able to hurt women like my father and no woman will be able to hurt children like my step mother.

If quantum computer can eliminate astronauts I can safely claim that this cruel hierarchical system has zero chance to survive! Eger Kuantum bilgisayarlari astronotlari ortadan kaldiracaksa bu vahsi hiyerarsik sistemin hayatta kalmak icin hicbir sansi yok. Here: Burda: http://t.co/25Bst1O07K Let’s turn to my family. Aileme donelim. My grandfather Osman Cavus Mehmet Iskender and my father Resat Iskender and paternal real uncles’ racist, fascist, misogynistic, anti-liberty, anti-life, anti-animal, and anti-nature mind-set blacklisted me all my life. Dedem Osman Cavus Mehmet Iskender’in ve Babam Resat Iskender ve oz amcalarimin irkci, fasist, kadin dusmani, ozgurluk dusmani, hayat dusmani, hayvan ve doga dusmani geri kafali zihniyeti beni butun hayatim boyunca mimledi. This is how this capitalist fascist system works. Kapitalist fasist sistem iste boyle isler. I will show that once you are blacklisted you are blacklisted forever. Birkere mimlenenin ebediyyen mimli kalacagini ispatlayacagim. You will see that you are not even allowed to protest and speak out against blacklisting! Mimlemeye karsi protesto ve konusmaya bile izin verilmedigini goreceksiniz! But you will do direct action without permission like my autobiography. Fakat benim otobiyografim gibi izin almadan dogrudan eylem yapacaksiniz. They will starve you, they will assasinate your character, they will target your life, they will threaten you, they oppress you, they will murder you! Insani acliga mahkum ederler, serefine camur atarlar, canina goz dikerler, tehdit ederler, baski yaparlar, katlederler! Right now l already got many warnings not to go to my village Kuyumcullu just because of speaking out the truth! Suan itibariyla dogruyu soyledigim icin koyum Kuyumculluya gitmemem icin bircok uyari aldim. They do emotional blackmail to me like my father is already sick old man and this whole autobiography is meaningless effort to produce anything positive and they threaten me like l risk my life pointlessly. Babamin hasta bir ihtiyar adam oldugunu ve tum bu otobiyografimin olumlu herhangi bir sonuc veremeyecek bir caba oldugunu soyleyerek bana duygusal santaj yapiyorlar ve hayatimi anlamsiz bir sekilde tehlikeye attigimi soyleyip ustu kapali beni tehdit ediyorlar. These were said for the trials of Chilian Dictator Pinoshe and Turkey’s dictator Kenan Evren. Bunlar Sili diktatoru Pinoshe ve Turkiye diktatoru Kenan Evren icin de soylendi.

Even though my grandfather and father are responsible mean people in my case actually real root reason of this blacklisting oppression is the global capitalist fascist imperialism. Dedem ve babam burada kotu adamlar olarak rol alsalar da bu mimleme zulmunun asil kok sebebi kuresel kapitalist fasist emperyalizmdir. My father Resat Iskender was a monster. Babam Resat Iskender bir canavardi. His father, that is my grandfather Osman Cavus was a monster too. Babamin babasi yani Osman Cavus dedem de bir canavardi. But they are imitator victims of this monster system too. Fakat onlar bu canavar sistemin taklitci kurbanlaridir da. As my mother stepped in their household as a young bride my grandfather Osman Cavus made all his family abuse my poor angel mother. Annem hanelerine yeni gelin olarak ayak bastigindan itibaren Osman Cavus dedem evindeki butun herkese zavalli melek annemi ezdirdi. Grandfather Osman Cavus was a cruel abusive misogynist man. Dedem Osman Cavus acimasiz kotu bir kadin dusmani adamdi. My grandfather loved his children from his second wife and became enemy to his children from his first wife. Dedem ikinci esinden olan cocuklarini sevdi ancak ilk esinden olan cocuklarina dusman oldu. Grandfather Osman Cavus divided and kicked out his children from his first wife. Osman Cavus dedem ilk cocuklarini ayirdi ve atti. He divided his own children and put them against each other. Kendi cocuklarini boldu ve birbirine dusman etti. As my grandfather Osman Cavus and my grandmother learned this domestic abuse from their parents they brainwashed all their children to do the same abuse. Osman Cavus dedem ve baba annem bu kotu muameleyi kendi aile buyuklerinden ogrendiler ve bunu yapmalari icin kendi cocuklarinin beynini yikadilar. So my father internalized this domestic abuse like my step mother and they did it to my mother and us. Bu sekilde babam uvey annem gibi bu aile ici kotu muamele kulturunu icsellestirdiler yani bu onlarin icine icledi ve boylece bunu anneme ve bize uyguladilar. Continuity of this vicious cycle totally depends on its secrecy because it is impossible to continue it if it is open. Bu kisir dongunun surmesi mutlaka gizli yapilmasina baglidir cunku ortaya cikmasi halinde surdurulmesi asla mumkun degildir. My father Resat Iskender was a polygamist and always wanted to have more than one wife at the same time and believed he can pray on my mother with the help of his own parents. Babam Resat Iskender cok eslilige inanan ve her zaman birden fazla es sahibi olmak isteyen ve kendi anne babasinin ve cevresinin yardimiyla annemi avlayabilecegine inanan bir adamdi. Their culture was totally patriarchal culture fed by religious fantasies. Kulturleri dinsel fantazilerle beslenen tamamen erkek egemenligine dayali bir kulturdu. My father Resat Iskender never cared what my mother Huriye Iskender
wanted about second wife!
Babam Resat Iskender annem Huriye Iskender’in kuma konusunda ne istedigine asla deger vermedi! He went out to search second wife as soon as he married with my mother. Annemle evlenir evlenmez ikinci es aramaya cikti. He secretly did his search for second wife with his polygamist and misogynist buddy like himself. Babam bu ikinci es arastirmasini cokeslilige inanan kadin dusmani baska bir
arkadasiyla gizlice yapti. While my father’s household forced my mother to slave for them in the fields and to leave us unattended and abused at home they encouraged my father to secretly look for a second wife. Babamin hanesi annemi tarlalarda kendileri icin kolelik yapmaya ve annemden olan bizi de evde kimsesizlige ve kotu muameleye terketmeye mecbur ediyorlar ve babami da gizlice ikinci bir es bulmasi icin tesvik ediyorlardi. Second wife was his religious right too even though he had noting to do with religion. Dinle hicbir alakasi olmasa da ikinci es onun dinen de hakkiydi. As my mother had mental breakdown due to their abuses they locked her in the hospital in order to bring second wife instead of ending abuses on her and us Annem evdeki kotu muamelelerden sinir krizi gecirince anneme eziyete son vermek yerine ikinci es alabilmek icin onu timarhaneye kapattilar. So they doubled their torture on my mother and her children. Boylece anneme ve cocuklarina yaptiklari iskenceyi iki misline katladilar. If there is hell the oppressors should go there immediately but on the contrary they threw my mother and her children to the hell in this life unfortunately. Eger bir cehennem olsa bu zalimlerin derhal bu cehnneme gitmesi gerekirken maalesef tam aksine bu zalimler zavalli masum annemi ve cocuklarini bu dunyadaki ceheneme attilar. They are fake gods who feel poweful by throwing innocent people, animals and earth into hells in this life. Bunlar masum insanlari, hayvanlari ve yeryuzunu cehenneme atarak kendilerini guclu hisseden sahte tanrilar.

Daughter of my father’s best buddy who is a misogynist polygamist complained to me that these her father and my father two misogynist polygamist men were ready to destroy anybody in their way to get a second wife. Babamin bu suc ortaginin ozkizi bana bu cokeslilige inanan kadin dusmani iki suc ortaginin ikinci es almak icin onlerindeki herkesi mahvetmeye hazir olduklarini soyledi. She is Refik Iskender’s wife. Kendisi Refik Iskender’in hanimidir. Refik Iskender is brother of Mehmet Iskender and Seref Iskender. Refik Iskender, Mehmet ve Seref Iskender ile kardestir. Their father’s name is Halil lbrahim Iskender. Babalarinin ismi Halil Ibrahim Iskender’dir. Refik Iskender’s wife told me and Refik about her father and my father venturing out to find second wife while her husband Refik was in disbelief. Refik Iskender’in hanimi bana ve kocasi Refik’e benim babam Resat Iskender ile kendi babasinin ikinci es bulmak icin nasil birlikte gizli maceralara ciktiklarini anlatirken kocasi Refik inanamiyordu. I was guest in Refik Iskender’s house in Karasu. Refik Iskender’in Karasu’daki evinde misafirdim. Refik abi and his wife gave me dinner. Refik abi ve esi bana aksam yemegi verdiler. Refik Iskender was former Prime Minister Bulent Ecevit’s long time political supporter and l tried to get Refik abi’s support to press my problems to Bulent Ecevit who was prime minister at that time. Refik Iskender cok uzun zaman Bulent Ecevit’in siyasi yandasiydi ve Bulent Ecevit o zaman Basbakan oldugu icin benim sorunlarimi Basbakan Ecevit’e cozdurmek icin Refik abiyle konusuyordum. Refik Iskender was Karasu Chairman of Ecevit’s Democratic Left Party. Refik Iskender Ecevit’in partisi Demokratik Sol Parti’nin Karasu baskaniydi. Refik abi had lucrative construction gravel business extracting a lot of gravels from Maden Deresi Brook in Kuyumcullu. Refik abi Kuyumcullu’da Maden Deresinden cok buyuk insaat cakili cekerek kazancli is yapiyordu. Maden Deresi brook is dead today because of gravel extraction as main reason for years. Maden Deresi bugun en basta iste bu cakil cekme yuzunden yok olmustur. Here: Burda: https://www.facebook.com/madenderemiz Refik’s brother Seref Iskender is also operating trout restaurant in Maden Deresi Brook. Refik Iskender’in kardesi olan Seref Iskender Maden Deresi’nde alabalik restorani isletiyor. Seref also participates in massacre of Maden Deresi brook by murdering poor animals living in the brook water for money. Seref para icin suda yasayan hayvanlari oldurerek Maden Deresi katliamina katiliyor. Seref Iskender’s trout slavery, torture and slaughter farming and restaurant are online news. Seref Iskender’in alabalik esaret, iskence ve katletme ciftligi ve restauranti internet haberidir. Here: Burda: http://www.karasu.gen.tr/index.php?go=5,3&id=8 Maden Deresi brook is in Wikipedia and you can click a link in it to see beautiful pics. Maden Deresi Wikipedia’da ve icinde guzel resimlere giden bir de link var. Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maden_Deresi Ruling party Democratic Left Party Karasu Town Chairman Refik Iskender told me “l cannot help you because you are former gray wolfe”! Iktidarda olan Demokratik Sol Parti’nin Karasu Baskani Refik Iskender “Sen eski ulkucusun ben sana yardim edemem”! dedi. After a few days Refik Iskender quit from his life long Democratic Left Party and joined Motherland Party which had biggest gray wolves mafia god fathers in the country! Birkac gun sonra Refik Iskender hayatini verdigi Demokratik Sol Partiden ayrilip memlekette en buyuk ulkucu mafya babalarinin yer aldigi Anavatan Partisi’ne katildi! What a hypocrisy! Ne iki yuzluluk! Typical dirty politician.Tipik pis siyasetci. My father married my mother just because he knew he could easily oppress her. Babam annemi kolayca ezebilecegini bildigi icin annemle evlendi. He was a total predator and she was his perfect prey. Babam tam bir vahsi avci ve annem de onun icin mukemmel bir avdi. My mother’s father and mother were both physically disabled from birth. Hem anneannem ve hem de dedem bedensel ozurluydu. Both of my maternal grandparents had limping leg problems. Hem anneannem ve hem de dedemin topallik sorunu vardi. Even my maternal granfather’s nick name was Lame Mehmet. Hatta annemin babasinin takma adi bile Topal Mehmetti. My mother’s both parents and all of her brothers and sisters were most mellow and timid people in the village. Annemin anne ve babasi ve tum kardesleri koydeki en yumusak huylu ve urkek insanlardi. My maternal uncles were never seen in all their life times socializing in the tea houses in the village. Dayimlar butun hayatlari boyunca hicbir zaman kahvede insanlarla oturup sohbet etmediler. My maternal side family was into working hard and staying away from public. Anne tarafim asiri calisma ve toplumdan uzak durma taraftariydi. My maternal grandfather was building mosques , roads and giving considerable donations to Karasu Head of Town but never supported my mother enough to fight my father’s oppression Annemin babasi aynen babamin babasi gibi camiler,kuran kurslari, yollar yaptiriyor, evine gelen kaymakamlara buyuk bagislar yapiyor ancak babamin baskisina karsi ne annemi ne de beni desteklemiyordu. Both my maternal and paternal grandparents were typical showy charity champions who would not care l starved to death but would spend all of their wealth to religious charities to claim fame. Her iki dedem de ben acliktan olsem de hic umarsamayan ancak gosteris icin butun zenginlilerini dinsel bagislara harcayan adamlardi. You can find so many such people who burn all forests and animals inside alive but would spend their weath to showy religious causes like my retired teacher Erdal Bicakci says it all in this video. Emekli ogretmen Erdal Bicakci hocamin bu videoda dedigi gibi ormanlari icindeki hayvanlarla beraber canli canli yakan ve zenginlilerini dinsel gosteris icin harcayan cok sayida insan bulabilirsiniz. Here: Burda: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xr65d5_odalar-ve-baskanlari-erdal-bicakci-3-bolum_shortfilms

However, I cannot pass without mentioning that my maternal uncle Mustafa Yilmaz owned and drove his Java motorcycle and travelled to Germany as a very short time and used Mercedes car after his return while my mother and her children were oppressed under such tortures. Ancak annemin bunca iskenceler altinda ezilirken Mutafa Yilmaz dayimin kendine ait olan Java marka bir motorsiklet kullandigini ve cok kisa sureligine isci olarak Almanyaya gittigini ve donusunde kendine ait Mersedes marka araba kullandigini anmadan gecemem. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jawa_Motors My father had his passport under his bed but could not realize his dream of going to Germany too. Babam pasaportunu yataginin altinda sakladi ama Almanyaya gitme ruyasini gerceklestiremedi. I never knew the story about my father’s passport until aunt Ayse’s husband Sadi Unal explained it to me years later during my research interview with him that doctors spotted some tiny black dot in my father’s exray film which killed my father’s Germany dream. Ayse Halamin kocasi Sadi Unal yillar sonra bir arastirma gorusmesinde bana doktorlarin babamin akciger filminde cok kucuk bir nokta gordukleri icin babamin Almanya ruyasinin oldugunu soyleyene kadar babamin pasaportunun hikayesini hic bilmiyordum. My interview with Sadi Unal was part of my research project about Turkish guest workers abroad in the class of Prof. Nermin Abadan Unat during my master studies. Sadi Unal ile yaptigim arastirma gorusmesi master okudugum donemde Prof. Nermin Abadan Unat’in dersinde yurtdisindaki Turk iscileri konusundaki arastirma projemin bir parcasiydi. Here: Burda:https://eksisozluk.com/nermin-abadan-unat–472455; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nermin_Abadan_Unat Sadi Unal told me his mixed feelings about his life as guest worker in Germany. Sadi Unal misafir isci olarak Almanyada gecen hayatiyla ilgili celiskili duygular anlatti. While Sadi Unal was proud that he passed tough exams to work in Germany he was upset that he lost his health for some work accident and that he suffered big cultural clash which turned his dreams into nightmare. Sadi Unal cok zor muayeneleri gectigi icin gururlu olmasina ragmen is kazasi gecirdigi icin sagligini kaybetmekten uzuntulu oldugunu ve buyuk kulturel catisma yasadigi icin ruyalarinin kabusa dondugunu anlatti. Sadi Unal’s most disturbing experience was that his German girlfriend was hosting him in her house while her German husband was in the same house. Sadi Unal’i en rahatsiz eden deneyimi de Alman kiz arkadasinin onu kendi evine kocasinin yanina goturup evde agirlamasiydi. Sadi Unal called Germans as pigs without family value while he was womanizing himself while his wife Ayse suffering back in Turkey. Sadi Unal kendi karisi Ayse Turkiye’de cile cekerken Almnyada kadinlarla egleniyor ve Almanlara aile kavrami olmayan domuzlar diye hakaret ediyordu. Sadi Unal’s trauma was to see German women are sexually equal to men. Sadi Unal’in travmasi Alman kadinlarinin cinsellikte erkeklere esit oldugunu gormekti.

Part of my research project was to interview a woman whose husband was a guest worker in Denmark. Arastirma projemin bir bolumu de kocasi Danimarka’da misafir isci olan bir kadinla gorusme yapmakti. This proved very difficult as Kuyumcullu culture strictly banned any woman to speak in private with a man outside close family. Bunun cok zor oldugu belli oldu cunku Kuyumcullu kulturunde bir kadinin yakin ailesi disindan bir adamla ozel olarak gorusmesi gorusmesi kesinlikle yasakti. Finally l found a half-way solution this ban by keeping the door open between interview room and hall filled with family members because goal of privacy was to encourage the woman interviewee to answer questions of oppression fearlessly. Somunda bu yasaga karsi gorusme odasi ile aile fertleri ile dolu oturma salonu arasindaki kapiyi acik birakarak bir orta yol cozumu buldum cunku burdaki gorusmenin ozel olmasinin amaci kadin gorusmecinin baskilara karsi sorulara korkusuzca cevap vermesini saglamakti. I realized that the interviewee woman was totally left alone in the village in caring for her children and farm business by her guest worker husband in Denmak. Gorusmeci kadinin cocuklarin bakimi ve ciftlik islerinin idaresinde Danimarka’da misafir isci olan kocasi tarafindan tamamen yalniz basina birakildigini farkettim. I reported that she was oppressed by patriarchical culture and overwhelming physical work. Kadinin erkek egemen kultur ve bunaltici is yuku altinda ezildigini raporuma yazdim.

My paternal side family members never had any physical disability and men were always in the tea houses. Baba tarafi sulalemde hicbir fiziksel engel yoktu ve erkekler hergun kahvelerdeydiler. My mother never went to any school and was unable to read and write at all. Annem hic okula gitmedi ve hicbir okur yazarligi yoktu. My mother was totally defenseless prey and her father Lame Mehmet had no will power to protect her from my father in his quest for second wife. Annem tumden korumasiz bir avdi ve Topal Mehmet dedemin onu babamin ikinci es almasina karsi koruyacak hicbir irade gucu yoktu. Maternal Granfather Osman Cavus and my father always abused my mother’s father Lame Mehmet as he tried to speak in defense for my mother. Osman Cavus dedem ve babam Topal Mehmet dedem annemi korumak icin gelip konusmak istedigi her zaman benim
yanimda bagirip hakaret etmislerdir. My father Resat Iskender used to run towards to assault my little laming maternal grandfather Lame Mehmet as if he will assault to the poor little
lame man who would only beg to stop my father after he finished beating and destroying my poor defenseless angel hearted mother Huriye. I must remind you that my maternal grandfather was not opposing to my father’s second wife according to Islam but he was defending my mother against my father’s who denied her motherhood and her right to live with her six children. Sizi annemin babasi topal Mehmet Yilmaz dedemin babamin Islama gore ikinci es almasina degil fakat annemin annelik hakkini ve alti cocuguyla beraber yasama hakkini reddeden babama karsi annemi savundugunu hatirlatmak isterim. My father poisoned my heart against my mother which in turn poisoned my feelings against himself and his family. Babam kalbimi anneme karsi zehirledi ki bu zehir babama ve onun ailesine karsi duygularimi zehirledi. As a result my father condemned me burn in the hell because according to Islam heaven is under the feet of mother ad father. Sonucta babam Islama gore beni ebediyyen cehennemde yanmaya mahkum etti cunku Islama gore cennet anne ve babanin ayaklari altindadir. Here: Burda : http://www.sorularlaislamiyet.com/qna/11549/evladin-anne-baba-uzerinde-hakki-var-mi-ve-evlat-anne-babasina-hakkini-helal-etmeyebilir-mi.html My father would walk to beat my mother’s father lame Mehmet as he begged my father “do not beat her she has right of motherhood” after he destroyed my poor angel hearted defenseless mother by beating. Babam Resat Iskender zavalli savunmasiz melek kalpli annemi iyice dovup mahvettikten sonra “dovme onun da annelik hakki var” diye yalvaran ihtiyar zavalli Topal Mehmet dedemi dovmek icin ustune yururdu. l know perfectly well that education was most favorite thing for my father but still for some reason he married my mother, a poor illiterate girl! Egitimin babamin en taktir ettigi sey oldugunu cok iyi biliyorum ancak buna ragmen babam nedense okuma yazma bilmeyen zavalli bir kiz olan annemle evlenmisti! Moreover he always ridiculed timidness of my maternal uncles and their
father.
Ayrica babam dayimlarin ve dedemin urkekligiyle hep alay etti. My father Resat Iskender was also a body fascist and had contempt about my maternal grandparents’ physical disabilities. Babam Resat Iskender bedensel sakatliga karsi son derece fasist birisiydi ve anneannemin ve dedemin sakatligini hakir goruyordu. He could never find anything good to mention in my mother and her family. Annemde ve ailesinde hicbir zaman konusacak iyi birsey bulamazdi. Then why did he marry my mother? O zaman neden annemle evlendi? Because my father Resat Iskender and grandfather Osman Cavus were both polygamist misogynist fascists. Cunku babam Resat Iskender ve dedem Osman Cavus cok eslilige inanan kadin dusmani birer fasisttiler. My father could easily crush my mother’s rightful struggle to live with her six children so that he can live with his second wife. Boylece ikinci esiyle yasayabilmek icin annemin alti cocugu ile beraber yasamak icin yapacagi hakli mucadeleyi kolaylikla kirabilirdi. My father pretends he is so pious and sent us to mosque course and forced me to pray all the time but always brainwashed and poisoned me against my mother who holds the key to heaven according to Islam. Babam cok dindarmis gibi gosteris yapiyor, bizi cami kursuna yolluyor ve namaz kilmam icin hep baski yapiyordu fakat cennetin anahtarini tutan anneme karsi benim beynimi yikayip kalbimi zehirliyordu. Therefore, my father condemned me to hell forever. Boylece babam beni ebediyyen cehenneme mahkum etti. I still have to struggle to detox from the poison that my father planted in my heart. Halen babamin kalbime ektigi zehiri temizlemeye calisiyorum. This poison is so deeply rooted so detoxing seems impossible task but I am not a quitter. Bu zehir o kadar define islmis ki temizlemesi imkansiz bir is gibi gorunuyor ama ben pes eden birisi degilim. This progressing autobiography is my main struggle to detox an heal from my father’s poison. Bu suregiden otobiyografi babamin zehirini temizlemek ve iyilesmek icin benim harcadigim enbuyuk cabadir. If l died while l listened to my father and hated my mother I was supposed to go directly and eternally to hell because heaven was under my mother’s feet. Eger babami dinleyip annemden nefret ettigim bir zamanda olmus olsaydim dogrudan ve ebediyyen cehenneme gitmis olacaktim cunku cennet annemin ayaklarinin altindadir. But then then l am still doomed to burn eternally in the hells because heaven is also father’s feet according to Islam. Fakat yine Islama gore cennet babanin da ayaklari altinda oldugu icin ben sonsuza kadar cehennemlerde yanmaya mahkumum. I know he knew very well Islam’s rule on mother and father so he knowingly made me hate my mother so I cannot go to heaven. Babamin islamin anne ve baba konusundaki hukmunu cok iyi bildigini ve beni cennete gidemeyeyim diye bile bile annemden nefret ettirdigini biliyorum. Here: Burda: http://annebabahakki.com/etiket/cennet/ My father ordered me to murder my innocent sister and her husband and rape her girl friend when I was 15 and then murder my 3 brothers for my father’s own wrongdoing when l was 35 which would condemn me to eternal hell as murderers of siblings will be condemned to be burned in the eternal hell according to Islam. Babam ben 15 yasimdayken gunahsiz ablami ve kocasini oldurmemi ve ablamin kiz arkadasina tecavuz edip atmami ve 35 yasimdayken babam kendi yaptigi isin sucunu uc erkek kardesimin ustune atip onlari oldurmemi emretti ki Islama gore kardes katileri ebediyyen cehennemlik olduklari icin beni ebediyyen cehennemde yanmaya mahkum etti. As l already know from these evidences my father condemned me to burn in the eternal hell so l was born to be burned in the hell eternally. Bu delillerden zaten biliyorum ki babam beni sonsuza kadar cehennemde yanmak icin mahkum etmis yani sonsuza kadar cehennemde yanmak icin dogmusum. Therefore god created me and written my destiny and blocked my chance of heaven in the hands of my father and state like he condemned trillions of animals to suffer massive tortures in this world without a chance of heaven in the after life. Bu nedenle Tanri trilyonlarca hayvani oteki dunyada cennete gitme sansi olmaksizin bu dunyada korkunc iskenceler yasamaya mahkum ettigi gibi beni de yaratirken ve kaderimi tayin ederken babamin ve devletin elleri vasitasiyla cennete gitme sansimi engelledi. Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Habil_ve_Kabil God did not give me decent opportunity to be happy in this world and go to heaven in the afterlife. Tanri bu dunyada mutlu olmak icin ve oteki dunyada cennete gitmek icin bana yeterli firsat vermedi. He forced me to question his actions. Hareketlerini sorgulamak icin beni zorladi. Why did he create this horrible evils? Tanri neden bu korkunc kotulukleri yaratti? Why did God put powerful satan as enemy against poor Adam and Eve? Tanri neden guclu seytani zavalli adem ile havaya karsi dusman olarak koydu? Why did not God create everything perfect like himself? Tanri neden herseyi kendi gibi mukemmel yaratmadi? Why is he so so sadist to enjoy to create and watch this horrible cruelty? Tanri neden bu korkunc vahseti yaratacak ve seyredecek kadar sadist? Why did he create the powerful evil and weak humans and blame us for falling into evil? Tanri neden guclu kotulugu ve zayif insanlari yaratiyor ve bizi kotuluge sapmakla sucluyor? Why does God give weak human prophets and decaying scripture papers instead of giving direct heaven-hell television channels to directly watch and know the heaven and hell available for anybody upon desire. Tanri insanlara diledikleri zaman cenneti ve cehennemi dogrudan gorup inanacaklari direk cennet-cehennem televizyon kanallari degil de neden zayif peygamberleri ve curuyen yazili kagitlari tek kurtulus yolu olarak veriyor.

My paternal grandfather Osman Cavus and my father Resat Iskender together with their family forced my angel hearted mother Huriye Iskender to attempt suicide as last resort to escape their unbearable abuses with constant degrading name calling, verbal abuse and beatings. Dedem Osman Cavus ve babam Resat Iskender butun hane halki ile birlikte annemi deli diye hakaretler ederek, dayanilmaz eziyetler altinda dove dove son kurtulus yolu olan
intihara mecbur ettiler. Under this insane unbearable misogynist poligamist fascist pressure my poor mother attempted suicide as last resort. Bu manyakca dayanilmaz kadin dusmani cokeslilige inanan siddet ortaminda melek kalpli annem enson care olarak intihara tesebbus etti. My mother Huriye was angel in their insanely abusive world.
Annem Huriye onlarin manyak korkunc dunyasinda bir melekti. They were violent and
powerful so they called my mother insane and lock her up for good after torturing her
. Siddet ve guce sahip olduklari icin anneme iskence yaptiktan sonra deli deyip onu timarhaneye kapattilar. In the world of Grandfather Osman Cavus, normalcy was fascist misogyny, polygamy, lies, exploitation, oppression and violence. Osman Cavus dedemin dunyasinda fasist kadin dusmanligi, cok evlilik, yalan, somuru, zulum ve siddet normal durumdur. Not fitting in their normalcy, my defenseless angel mother becomes abnormal, insane and cannot claim any right! Onlarin normaline uymayan korumasiz melek annem normal disidir, delidir ve hicbir hak iddia edemez! My father invented all false excuses to beat and abuse my mother to destroy her resistance against separating from her children and her struggle to stay and care for her children . Babam cocuklarindan ayrilip tarlaya gitmek yerine onlarla yasayip onlara bakmak isteyen annemin direnisini yok etmek amaciyla annemi dovmek ve ezmek icin herturlu yalanci bahaneyi yaratti. My father and Grandfather Osman Cavus household sickened my mother by torture knowingly and willingly. Babam ve Dedem Osman Cavus hanesi bile bile isteyerek annemi iskenceyle hasta ettiler. Grandmother Osman Cavus household hurt my mother so badly that death was better than their oppression. Osman Cavus hanesi annemin canini o kadar yakti ki annem icin olmek onlarin eziyetinden daha iyiydi. My mother Huriye could not kill herself only because she cared for her children. Annem Huriye sadece cocuklarini dusundugu icin kendini olduremedi. But suicide attempt is automatic reason to get locked up and undergo electroshocks tortures. Fakat intihar tesebbusu Akil Hastanesine kapatmak ve EKT elektrosok iskencesi icin yeterli otomatik bahaneydi. Here: Burda: http://www-rp0a.bianet.org/bianet/insan-haklari/67924-psikiyatride-ekt-iskencesi–2 This was absolute punishment torture to my innocent
angel mother while a total reward for the real torturer monsters at home.
Bu masum melek annem icin tam bir haksiz ceza iskencesi olurken evdeki gercek iskenceci canavarlar icin de
mukafat oluyordu. That was exactly what Osman Cavus household was eagerly waiting for. Bu da aynen Osman Cavus hanesinin sevincle bekledigi seydi. Now monsters could call her insane officially and bring a second wife and refuse her right to live with her children in her own property. Canavarlar artik annemi resmen deli diye cagirabilirler ve ikinci es getirebilirlerdi ve cocuklariyla kendi mulku olan evinde yasama hakkini tanimayabilirlerdi. Millions of oppressed people around the world commit suicide to escape the unbearable oppression as a last resort. Dayanilmaz eziyetlerden kurtulmak icin milyonlarca insan son care olarak intihar etmektedir. As Mankind are responsible for all these murders as we let this cruel oppression going. Bu vahsi zulmun surmesine musaade ettigimiz icin insanlik olarak biz sorumluyuz. Root of this misogyny is also so deep in the Kuyumcullu village community like all country and the world. Bu kadin dusmanliginin koku butun ulkede ve dunyada oldugu gibi Kuyumcullu koyu toplumunda da cok derindir. Fascism and cruelty against life, animals and nature are national and global
problem.
Kadin dusmanligi, fasizm, ve hayata, hayvanlara ve dogaya karsi vahset ulusal ve kuresel bir sorundur. I hope my message here helps to fight this horrible system and build another humane world. Umidim benim bu mesajim bu korkunc sistemle savasmak ve insancil bir dunya kurmak icin yararli olur. All my life no village woman could pass walking on main street between teahouses through the Kuyumcullu village center. Butun hayatim boyunca hicbir koylu kadin Kuyumcullu merkezinde kahvelerin arasindaki ana
yoldan yuruyerek gecememistir. That includes a brave woman teacher Nuran from our village Kuyumcullu. Buna koyumuz Kuyumcullu halkindan olan yurekli ogretmen Nuran Hanim da dahildir. Even though she had much higher education and much more respected job than almost all men in the village the cruel misonynist fascist men did not let her break this misogynist ban and walk in a village square. Koydeki hemen her erkekten cok daha egitimli ve cok daha saygin isi olmasina ragmen kadin dusmani acimasiz fasist erkekler onun kadin dusmani yasagi cignemesine ve koy meydanindan yurumesine musaade etmemistir. It did not matter Teacher Nuran Ciftci’s father owned the teahouse building right by the village square and she lived in the upstairs. Nuran Ciftci ogretmen hanimin babasinin koy meydanindaki kahvehanenin de oldugu binaya sahip olmasi ve ust katinda oturmasi da birsey degistirmemistir. Nuran Ciftci was brave enough to wear blue jeans and not cover her hair in the village. Nuran Ciftci koyde kot giyecek ve basini kapatmayacak kadar cesurdu. Village center was always a forbidden zone to village women. Koy merkezi koy
kadinlarina her zaman yasak bolgeydi. I think this is general rule in Turkey and Muslim countries except luxury and touristic city centers that women are not supposed to be in public places where men hang out unless there is an absolute necessity. Zannedersem islam ulkelerinde luks kent merkezleri ve turistik yerler haricinde erkeklerin oldugu kamusal yerlerde mutlaka mecbur kalmadikca kadinlarin bulunmasi yanlis kabul ediliyor. But professional women from other places could enter inside the tea houses only to do their job in Kuyumcullu village. Ancak baska yerlerden gelen meslek sahibi kadinlar Kuyumcullu koyu kahvelerine sadece is icabi girebilirler. I live in the USA since 2000 but I do not think this misogynist ban changed even today. 2000 yilindan beri ABD’de yasiyorum fakat bugun bile bu kadin dusmani yasagin degistigini sanmiyorum. If this cruel misogynist oppressive fasist village culture can bind such powerful and courageous woman teacher Nuran Ciftci Hanim it can easily
destroy any poor powerless woman like my golden hearted but powerless mother.
Eger bu kadin dusmani baskici vahsi fasist koy kulturu ogretmen Nuran Hanim gibi guclu ve yurekli bir kadini boyle bagliyorsa, annem gibi altin kalpli fakat gucsuz herhangi bir kadini cok rahatlikla mahvedebilir. Misogynist fascist men of the village use gossip machine to assassinate any different person. Koyun kadin dusmani fasist erkekleri farkli olan herkesi dedikodu makinesi ile yokeder. If you oppose powers like my mother Huriye did against my father Resat Iskender the same gossip machine and violence will destroy you. Eger annem Huriye Iskeder’in babam Resat Iskender’in zulmune karsi ciktigi gibi zalimlere karsi cikarsaniz ayni dedikodu makinesi ve siddet sizi mahveder. If you are different in any way or defending different values the same gossip and violence machine mows you. Herherhangi bir sekilde farkliysaniz veya farkli degerleri savunuyorsaniz ayni dedikodu ve siddet makinesi sizi de bicer.

Misogynist fascist anti-life culture is common in turkey and the world. Kadin dusmani fasist hayat karsiti kultur Turkiye’de ve dunyada yaygindir. Here: Burda: http://www.haberturk.com/gundem/haber/872731-ayibinizi-temizleyin-ve-kizinizi-oldurun
This very fresh news shows rapist supporting monsters pressure a poor mother to murder her own rape victim young poor daughter and all society and state are behind the rapist and his supporting monsters. Bu cok taze haber tecavuzcuyu destekleyen canavarlarin zavalli kizi tecavuze ugrayan zavalli anneyi toplumdan tecrit ettiklerini ve kizini oldurmesi
icin baski yaptiklarini ve toplumun ve devletin tecavuzcuyu ve onu destekleyen canavar yandaslarini korudugunu gostermektedir. But again rape and misogynist culture is so widespread in the USA you will be surprised. Fakat yine Amerika’da tecavuz ve kadin dusmanligi kulturu o kadar yaygin ki sasip kalirsiniz. It is reported that one in three
women in military is raped and one in six women in civilian is raped but roughly 70 percent rape goes unreported!
Orduda uc kadindan birisi, sivilde alti kadindan
birisi tecavuz sikayetinde bulunuyor ancak tecavuzlerin yaklasik yuzde yetmisi sikayetsiz kaliyor.
Here: Burda: http://inthesetimes.com/article/3848/why_soldiers_rape
And remember again this American empire is based on Indian genocide, black slavery, all kinds of discriminations and all kinds of wars! Ve yine hatirlayin bu Amerikan
imparatorlugu, yerli halklarin soykirimla yok edilmesine, zenci koleligine, herturlu ayrimciliga, ve herturlu savasa dayaniyor! Actually this is our 10,000 years of cruel
civilization based on oppressing, exploiting and destroying any different people, animals and earth.
Esasinda bu bizim medeniyetimiz herhangi bir sekilde farkli olan insanlara,
hayvanlara ve yerkureye zulum, somuru ve yoketme ilkeleri uzerine kurulmustur. My father and grandfather’s household surrounded my mother as soon as she stepped in their house as bride. Babam ve Dedemin hanehalki, annem gelin olarak evlerine ilk ayak bastigi andan itibaren onu kusattilar. The reason they abused my mother is that she is different than their cruel and abusive kind. Anneme eziyet etmelerinin nedeni annemin onlardan farkli olmasiydi. Here: Burda: http://www.antoloji.com/kaynana-gelinine-turlu-eziyet-eder-siiri/ Grandfather Osman Cavus household was all violent and abusive. Osman Cavus dedemin hanesi tamamen vahsi ve istismarciydi. Here: Burda: http://www.hurriyet.com.tr/gundem/20122522.asp# ; http://www.haberturk.com/yasam/haber/724743-cocuk-geline-iskence-ve-cinsel-taciz My mother was a totally peaceful and mellow golden hearted mother. Annem tumden mulayim sakin tabiatli altin kalpli bir anneydi. My mother’s family was also totally peaceful and timid. Annemin ailesi de tamamen bariscil ve urkekti. My mother’s family spent big money for showy charity instead of helping my mother. Annemin ailesi anneme yardim yapmak yerine gosterisci yardim icin cok buyuk para harcadi. Grandfather Osman Cavus family had contempt against my maternal grandparen for their lameness. Osman Cavus dedemin ailesi anneannem ve dedemi topalliklarindan dolay hakir goruyorlardi. My mother was totally outside their violent and deceptive culture. Annem tamemen onlarin vahsi ve yalanci kulturlerinin disindaydi. They saw her as a space alien. Annemi uzayli yabanci gibi gorduler. Osman Cavus household attacked on my mother for her difference like an enemy. Osman Cavus hanesi farkli olan anneme farkli olmasindan dolayi sanki dusman gibi saldirdilar. They alienated her as undesirable. Istenmeyen bir kisi olarak onu disladilar. Grandfather Osman Cavus household blacklisted her. Osman Cavus
Dedemin hanesi annemi mimledi. She was not normal in their normal culture of violence and
deception. Onlarin normal siddet ve aldatma kulturleri icinde annem normal degildi. My mother was abnormal in their insane normalcy. Onlarin manyak normalleri
icinde annem anormal sayiliyordu.

They sunk in so much violence and deception and they knew well my mother’s family would not defend her in any way. O kadar siddet ve yalana batmislardi ve annemin ailesinin annemi hicbir sekilde korumayacagini biliyorlardi. They also knew village culture is totally misogynist and will ignore their destruction on my mother. Koy kulturunun de kadin dusmani oldugunu ve annemi mahvetmelerine goz yumacagini biliyorlardi. They destroyed her as my mother resisted against my father’s push for a second wife. Babamin ikinci es almak ve annemi cocuklarindan ayirmak icin yaptigi baskiya karsi direnen annemi mahvettiler. They hurt her so badly that she tried to kill herself to escape from destruction. Annemin canini o radar yaktilar ki annem kurtulmak icin kendini
oldurmeye calisti. Then they use this against her. Sonra bunu da anneme karsi
kullandilar. Altogether they isolated her away from her children. Hep beraber
annemi cocuklarindan tamamen ayirdilar. They subjected her EKT electroshock tortures in the extremely abusive Bakirkoy mental hospital conditions. Annemi son derece kotu
Bakirkoy Akil Hastanesi sartlarinda EKT elektrosok iskencelerine mahkum ettiler. They portrayed her like a violent monstrous killer who will murder bloodthirstily all of her own children without a blink. Annemi sanki kendi cocuklarini gozunu kirpmadan katledecek kana
susamis azgin bir katil gibi gosterdiler. Grandfather Osman Cavus household forced my golden hearted mother to extremely painful electroshock tortures just to destroy her health and assassinate her angel personality. Osman Cavus Dedemin hanesi annemin sagligini mahvetmek ve tertemiz ismine camur atmak icin onu korkunc elektro sok iskencelerine mecbur ettiler. My maternal grandfather Lame Mehmet tried to save my mother by giving the money to buy a nice piece of land and to build a house on it. Annemin babasi Topal Mehmet dedem kizini kurtarmak dusuncesiyle iyi bir arsa almak ve yeni bir ev yapmak icin gereken butun parayi babam Resat Iskender’e verdi. But my father continued to beat and abuse my mother in front of my eyes all the time in the new house. Babam yeni evde annemi gozumun onunde surekli dovmeye ve hakaretlere devam etti. My mother still does not know how to read and write. Annem halen okuma ve yazmayi bilmiyor. My mother was a total angel. Annem tam bir melekti. My mother never ever hit or insulted anybody. Annem asla hickimseye vurmadi veya incitecek bir laf soylemedi. As a result my mother tried to commit suicide by banging her hands to windows of our
house bleeding all over in front of my eyes
. Bunun sonucunda annem benim gozlerimin onunde heryeri kanlara bulandirana kadar elleriyle evimizin camlarina vurup intihar etmek istedi.
I am not sure how many times she attempted to kill herself to escape from oppression and destruction. Annemin ezilmekten ve mahvolmaktan kurtulmak icin kac kere intihara
tesebbus ettigini bilmiyorum. My father forced her to be taken to Bakirkoy Mental Hospital and undergo painful electroshock tortures instead of ending his abuse on her as if her
destruction was not enough.
Babam anneme eziyete son vermek yerine sanki annemi mahvettigi yetmiyormus gibi onu zorla Bakirkoy Akil Hastanesi’ne kapattirip korkunc elektrosok
iskencelerine tabi tutturdu. My father used to tell me that my mother was insane therefore she did not care for us and he would bring a new mother to care for us when I was only
four/five-year old
. Babam, ben daha 4/5 yasimdayken annemin deli oldugunu onun icin bize bakmadigini, bize cici anne getirecegini bana soyluyordu. My father worsened
Grandfather Osman Cavus tradition to abuse her angel kindness and mellowness.
Babam Osman Cavus dedemin zulum gelenegini devralip annemin bu melek gibi yumusakligini ve guzel huylulugunu hep istismar etti. My father sharpened the cruel tradition even more. Babam vahsi gelenegi daha da siddetlendirdi. My monster father portrayed my angel mother as a super dangerous bloodthirsty monstrous horrible murderer! . Canavar babam, melek kalpli annemi son derece tehlikeli kana susamis korkunc canavar bir katil
gibi gosterdi. As he got new wife he turned against us automatically. Yeni kadin alinca otomatikman bize karsi da cephe aldi. So my father blacklisted us even before l was born. Yani babam bizi daha ben dogmadan mimlemis. But as I was very good at school they turned all their wrath on me. Fakat ben okulda cok iyi oldugum icin butun gazaplarini bana yonelttiler. They also brainwashed and turned my siblings against
me too.
Kardeslerimin beynini yikayarak onlari da bana karsi cevirdiler. My father and stepmother made me a undesirable child of the family as I was very good at school. Babam ve uvey annem okulda cok iyi oldugum icin beni ailenin istenmeyen evladi yaptilar. They both blacklisted me as I used to say my mother is not insane but she has just got
sick
. Annemin deli degil sadece hastalandigini soyledigim icin babam ve uvey annem birlikte beni mimlediler.

They banned me to visit my mother and grandmother.Annemi ve anneannemi ziyaret etmemi kesinlikle yasakladilar. I defied them and visited my mother and grandmother and heard from my grandmother how mean were my father and stepmother. Onlarin emirlerine karsi geldim ve annemi ve anneannemi cok ziyaret ettim ve anneannemden babamin ve uvey annemin yaptiklari kotulukleri dinledim. My
mother was all under drug and was so afraid of my father.
Annem ilaclarin etkisi altindaydi ve babamdan cok korkardi. My mother Huriye could never criticize my father Resat. Annem Huriye babam Resat’i asla elestiremezdi. All my mother said was
other people made my father do mean stuff
. Annemin tum soyledigi sey baskalarinin babama kotuluk yaptirdigi idi. My mother could not criticize my father. Annem babami elestiremezdi. My step mother Hayriye Ozturk broke my nose by sneakily punching my nose for nothing. Uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk sebepsiz yere sinsice yumruk vurarak burnumu kirdi. My blood was flowing all over and some farm workers saved me from my stepmother Hayriye. Heryer kanla doldu ve findik iscileri beni uvey annem Hayriye’nin elinden cekip kurtardilar. My father never took me to hospital for my broken nose but later told me that there is a broken bone piece in my nose which needed a surgery when l become 15. Babam kirik burnum icin beni hastaneye goturmedi fakat sonradan burnumdaki kirik kemigi aldirmak icin 15 yasina gelince ameliyat olmam lazim geldigini soyledi. My father never paid attention to it later and scolded me for being kind to farm workers who saved me from domestic abuse in general. Babam burnumdaki kirik kemigi sonradan bos verdi ve genel olarak beni evdeki baskidan kurtaran findik iscilerine iyi davrandigim icin beni hep azarladi. Our farm workers protected me from domestic abuse as much as they could and l helped them in any way l could in exchange. Bizim findik iscilerimiz guclerinin yettigince beni evdeki siddetten korudular ve ben de bunun karsiliginda onlara gucumun yettigince yardimci oldum. My step mother threatened to kill me by putting worms into my nose while I sleep. Uvey annem ben uyurken burnuma solucan koyarak beni oldurmekle tehdit etti. My father and stepmother beat me up for complaining about it. Sikayet ettigim icin babam ve uvey annem beraber beni dovduler. Worms can be deadly in the nose. Solucanlar burunda olumcul olabilir. Here: Burda:

http://www.theblaze.com/stories/2012/07/02/doctors-remove-wiggling-five-inch-parasitic-worm-from-mans-eye-graphic-footage/

When I told my father that my step mother is starving me he ordered me to swallow raw egg by stealing under hens. Babama uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk’un beni ac biraktigini soyledigim zaman bana yeni yumurtlayan tavuklarin altindan cig yumurta calip yutmayi emretti. However my father never mentioned any hygiene rules in stealing and swallowing hot
eggs under hens while they still sit on them
. Ancak babam hic birzaman tavuklarin altindan sicak yumurtalari calarken ve yutarken gereken temizlik kurallarini hic anlatmadi.
I am very lucky I did not die from salmonella disease coming from the raw eggs. Cig yumurtalardan gelen salmonella hastaligindan olmedigim icin cok sansliyim.
Here: Burda: http://www.cdc.gov/features/salmonellaeggs/ Also my
step mother constantly beat me up for swallowing hot raw eggs under hens as she wanted to sell the same eggs.
Ancak uvey annem para icin satmak istedigi sicak yumurtalari cig yuttugumu anlayinca beni surekli dovdu. I am really lucky l survived from their abuses. Eziyetlerinden dolayi olmedigim icin cok sansliyim.My step mother Hayriye
Ozturk kept for herself and sold all the food stuffs like eggs, butter, and home made green cheese we had in the house
. Uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk evimizde olan yumurta, tereyagi ve kesik peyniri gibi yiyecekleri kendine saklar ve satardi. My step mother used my paternal
uncle Suleyman Iskender as her secret salesman to sell food stuff she steals from our mouths at home
. Uvey annem evdeki yiyecekleri bogazimizdan kesip gizlice satmak icin amcam
Suleyman Iskender’i satici olarak kullanirdi. As if uncle Suleyman did not
get it enough to starve us by selling our food he would sneak and grab me behind and torture me from my ears until they bleed for his sadist fun and terrorize me with threats like “l will hang you to nail at the ceiling from your ears and your genitals”.
Vahsi Suleyman amcam bizim
bogazimizdan kestigi yiyecekleri sattigi yetmiyormus gibi sinsice arkadan gelip
kulagimi yakalar yirtilincaya kadar zevk icin iskence eder ve beni korkutmak icin “kulagindan ve cinsel organlarindan asacam seni tavandaki civiye” diyerek tehditler ederdi. I think uncle Suleyman is perfect material for torturing innocent people in American secret
torture centers!
Galiba Suleyman amcam gizli Amerikan iskence merkezlerinde masum insanlara iskence isi icin bicilmis kaftan! I really wonder if there is an American secret torture center near Kuyumcullu koyu? Kuyumcullu koyu yakinlarinda gizli Amerikan
iskence merkezi var midir, cok merak ediyorum. His hands were very strong and it was well known in the village too. Elleri de cok gucludur and koyde cok iyi bilinirdi. Uncle Suleyman was always a security hitman to beat my poor mother to protect my step mother especially when my father was sick in the bed or away from home. Suleyman amcam ozellkle babamin hasta yatakta oldugu zaman veya evden uzkta oldugu zaman uvey annemi korumak ve annemi dovmek icin daima tetikci koruma olmustur. Years later
uncle Suleyman dropped tears as he could not beat me in the wrist wrestling.
Yillar sonra Suleyman amcam bilek guresinde beni yenemeyince gozlerinden yas geldi.In those days when l was 7 or 8 I witnessed uncle Suleyman grabbing biggest wood chopping ax and assaulting
his sister Mumine Ozmen’s husband Ruhi Ozmen in the middle of Kuyumcullu village.
O
gunlerde 7 veya sekiz yasimdayken Suleyman amcami buyuk odun baltasini kaptigi gibi Mumine halamin kocasi Ruhi Ozmen enistemi Kuyumcullu koyunun ortasinda dogramak icin kovaladigini
hatirliyorum. Ruhi Ozmen was very friendly to me but unfortunately he was shot by his own younger brother for land dispute. Ruhi Ozmen bana karsi cok yakindi ama
maalesef kendi ozkardesi tarafindan yer davasinda vurularak olduruldu. My stepmother bought knitting wools and stuff for only herself and her own kids and my father. Sadece kendisi, kendi cocuklari ve babam icin orgu yunleri ve baska seyler alirdi. My step mother Hayriye Ozturk knitted so many things all her life to her own family but nothing to me . Uvey annem Hayriye butun hayati boyunca kendi ailesi icin o kadar orgu ordu ama bana asla birsey ormedi. She would kill me if she caught me swallowing egg or eating green cheese. Beni yumurta yutarken veya peynir yerken yakalarsa oldururdu. I constantly had
only two options hunger or risk of beating.
Surekli olarak sadece iki secenegim oldu: aclik ve dayak riski. She threw big fire woods in very close range stacked in the balcony
down on me to hit me in the head
. Beni kafamdan vurmak icin cok yakin mesafeden balkonda istifli yakacak odunlari bana atardi. My father Resat Iskender and stepmother Hayriye Ozturk both threatened to shoot me in my mouth to stop me defending my mother. Her ikisi de annemi savundugum icin beni agzimdan vurmakla tehdit ettiler. My step mother Hayriye Ozturk actually pulled the gun on my chest and threatened
he will shoot me for fun.
Uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk aniden tabanca cekti ve gogsume nisan alarak beni zevk icin oldurmekle tehdit etti.They sneakily hit heavy stuff to my head when I eat my food. Ikisi de yemek yerken sinsice agir cisimlerle basima cok vurdular. I guess they wanted to disable me! Sanirim beni sakatlamak istiyorlardi. They would love to see and use me as a disabled slave! Beni sakat bir kole gibi gormek ve kullanmak icin can atarlardi! They became my enemies especially as l was very good at the school and visited my maternal grandmother. Okulda cok iyi oldugum ve anneannemi ziyaret ettigim icin ozellikle bana dusman oldular. None of my siblings was very good at school and cared to defy orders not to see our grandmother. Kardeslerimin hicbirisi okulda cok iyi degildi ve anneannemi ziyaret yasagini cignemeye cesaret edemezdi.
My siblings were all very obedient then! Kardeslerim cok itaatkardilar o zaman! They got good land sharing and other financial support for their obedience secretly while l was blacklists all my life. Ben butun hayatim boyunca mimli olarak cile cekerken itaatlerinin karsiligini gizlice guzel yerleri paylasarak ve parasal destekler alarak gorduler. They always defended this unfair treatment by claiming that l lost my family right as l went to college and did not work at home living with my father! Bu hakkaniyetsiz muameleyi evde babamla yasayip calismasigimi ve univesiteye giderek ailevi hakkimi kaybettigimi one surerek savundular. Honestly my siblings sense of family justice cannot be found anywhere around the world. Dogrusu, kardeslerimin aile hukuku duygusu dunyanin hicbir yerinde bulunamaz. Actually they secretly shared land between themselves as if I lost my right of inheritance to punish me for going to college. Gercekten beni unversiteye gittigim icin cezalandirmak amaciyla gizlice aralarinda yer paylastirdilar. This is open punishment of my family and this strike clearly proves that they hated and did everything to prevent me from going to school from the first beginning. Bu ailemin beni acikca cezalandirmasidir ve bu darbe okula gittigim icin benden nefret ettiklerini ve okula gitmemi en bastan beri engellediklerini ispatlar. This strike also proves that my family did not only fought against my study but also fought to disrupt my justice struggle against donme ambassador undersecretaries in the Foreign Ministry of Turkey. Bu darbe, ailemin sadece okumami karsi degil ozellikle Turkiye Disisleri Bakanligi’na karsi verdigim adalet mucadelemi bozmak icin de savastigini ispatlar. My family secretly shared land between themselves after l was discharged by the Gladio undersecretary Tugay Ozceri in August 1989 instead of backing me in my most difficult time proving that they did not consider me as part of their family. Ailem once donme Mustesar Buyukelci Nuzhet Kandemir’in meslek memurlugundan cikar mask ve Gladyo Mustesari Tugay Ozceri’nin Bakanliktan Agustos 1989’da atmasinin ardindan hayatimin en zor zamaninda beni desteklemek yerine beni kendilerinden kabul etmediklerini ispatlayarak aralarinda gizlice mal paylasimi yaptilar. My own blood family backstabbed me after my Diplomatik foreign ministry family backstabbed me. Diplomatik Disisleri bakanligi ailesi beni arkamdan bicakladiktan sonra kendi kanimdan ailem beni arkamdan bicakladi.

Even my step grandmother told me that if I oppose or complain to my step mother my step uncle Mustafa Ozturk and Huseyin Ozturk and other step uncles would kill me. Uvey annemin annesi bile eger uvey annemi sikayet veya itiraz edersem uvey dayim Mustafa ve Huseyin Ozturk ve diger uvey akrabalarimin beni oldurecegini soylerdi. My father and step mother never allowed my mother enjoy a peacefull visit to her six children let alone living with us. Babam ve uvey annem annemin alti cocugu ile beraber yasamasini bir yana birakin annemin huzurlu bir sekilde cocuklarini ziyaret etmesine asla musaade etmediler. My real brothers and sisters are here from older to younger: Oldest sister Nezahat Iskender, me, Sezai Iskender, younger sister Kadriye Yildiz, Tural Iskender, Sezgin Iskender. Oz kardeslerim en buyugunden en kucugune soyledir : Nezahat Iskender, ben, Sezai Iskender, Kadriye Yildiz, Tural Iskender, Sezgin Iskender. My half brothers and sisters from my step mother Hayriye Ozturk are from oldest to youngest are here: Murat Iskender, Oznur Iskender(marriage name is
different), Ozcan Iskender.
Uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk’ten olan uvey kardeslerim en buyugunden en kucugune soyledir: Murat Iskender, Oznur Iskender(evlilik soyadi degisik),
Ozcan Iskender. Each time my mother Huriye Iskender came to see her children she risked beating and death. Her seferinde annem Huriye Iskender dayak ve olum
riskini goze aldi. She could never take us for a visit to our maternal grandparents Lame Mehmet and Hava. Annem Huriye Iskender bizi hicbir zaman anneannem Hava ile topal Mehmet dedemi ziyarete goturemedi. She was never allowed to take us for a very short walk or stay with us alone without my father or step mother. Annem bizimle bir dakika bile yalniz oturmaya veya bizi bir dakika bile gezmeye goturmeye izin alamadi. She had lived all battered wife syndrome. Annem ezilen kadin ruh halini tam olarak yasadi. The more she was beaten the more she loved my father. Annem dayak yedikce babama daha fazla asik oldu. This is all because of terror my father created. Bu tamemen babamin yarattigi teror yuzundendi. This is same for all dictators. Bu tum diktatorler icin aynidir. Even my step mother used to call my father as Mud Sevket an then Gaddafi. Hatta uvey annem bile babami ilk once Camur Sevket ve sonra Kaddafi olarak cagirirdi. Mud Sevket is character who is well known to be nasty and betray his promises and friends. Camur Sevket vaatlerine ve dostlarina ihanet etmesiyle, cirkefligi ile taninan bir karakterdi. Here: Burda: http://www.kurdinfo.com/arsiv/basin/sahin_03.htm ; https://www.facebook.com/bensevketcamursevket Even some of his buddies called him the Colonel meaning Gaddafi. Hatta babamin bazi yakin arkadaslari bile babami Kaddafi anlaminda Albay diye cagirirlardi. His toughness did not work for my step mother and her family and children. Babamin sertligi uvey anneme, onun ailesine ve cocuklarina karsi gecerli degildi. Again my father’s mercilessness was never
seen on my younger step brother Ozcan Iskender who also went to college to study business management in the night shift in Bursa.
Yine babamin bana karsi acimasizligi Bursa’da gece bolumunde isletme okumak icin universiteye giden uvey kardesim Ozcan Iskender icin de asla gecerli degildi.

The reason why I report my abusive childhood life is my belief that a person’s homeland is his/her childhood. Istismar edilmis cocukluk hayatimi anlatmamin sebebi bir insanin anavataninin onun cocuklugu olduguna inanmamdir. If your childhood was bad it is very difficult to have a good adult life. Eger cocuklugunuz kotu ise yetiskin hayatinizin iyi olmasi zordur. Here: Burda: http://annelerevecocuklarinaozel.blogspot.com/2012/02/cocuklugunu-doya-doya-yasamams-bir.html All your adult life should be all total struggle to regain your childhood. Tum yetiskin hayatiniz cocuklugunuzu geri kazanmak icin yani topuma faydali bir is yaparak kotuyu iyiyle telafi etmek seklinde topyekun bir mucadele olmasi gerekir. Here: Burda: http://www.radikal.com.tr/yazarlar/tayfun_atay/cocuklugumuz_anavatanimizdir-1092271 Let’s say someone dropped out of elementary school because he was really bad I the school is now helping people around him/her to beome literate. Diyelim ki okulda cok kotu oldugu icin daha ilk okuldayken okuldan atilan birisi cevresinde okuma yazmayi bilmeyelere okuryazarlik ogretmeye yardimci oluyor. I see my past pains become happiness as I fight for a total liberation. Topyekun kurtulus icin mucadele ettikce gecmis acilarimin mutluluk haline geldigini goruyorum.

However my father and step mother never failed to take her own kids to her own parents many times a year even though they were 100 times further away in Akyazi.
Ancak canavar babam ve uvey annem yilda birkac kere kendi cocuklarini alip 100 misli daha uzakta Akyazi’da oturan anne ve babasina ziyaretleri hic aksatmadi. The
misogynist, polygamist, fascist state and the community overlords never helped my golden hearted poor mother against these abuses
. Kadin dusmani, cokeslilige inanan fasist devlet ve toplum kodamanlari bu zulumlere karsi altin kalpli anneme hicbir sekilde yardim etmediler. State and society supported my oppressor father . Devlet ve toplum
daima zalim babami destekledi. Nobody confronted my father and grandfather to help my mother for her natural motherhood right to live with her six children. Anneme dogal annelik hakki olan alti cocugu ile beraber yasama hakki icin hic kimse yardimci olmadi. Even my father’s own father did not believe it is worth to make a noise about it. Hatta annemin oz babasi bile bunun icin gurultu yapmaya degecegine inanmiyordu. If my maternal grandfather wanted to support my mother’s basic motherhood right he could bring all his family and friends together with my mother to unite with us in the house where we lived with father and stepmother in all holidays and other days when they go to weekly town markets etc. Eger annemin babasi annemin temel hakki olan annelik hakkini destekleseydi butun bayram tatillerinde ve her hafta kurulan kasaba pazarina alisverise gittikleri diger gunlerde butun ailesini ve komsularini annemle beraber alti cocukla kaldigimiz eve ziyarete getirirdi. My maternal grandparents and uncles found shopping in the town market was more exciting than paying a visit to support their grandchildren. Annemin babasi ve dayimlar torunlara destek ziyaretine gitmektense Kocaali pazarina alisverise gitmeyi daha heyecanli buldular. So they abandoned my mother and her six children to a totall neglect. Yani dedem ve dayimlar annemi ve alti cocugunu tamamen ihmal edip attilar. When l was walking to and from the middle school l would protest their neglect to my mother and six children by refusing to get on my maternal uncle’s farm tractor. Orta okula yaya gidip gelirken onlarin ihmalini protesto etmek icin dayimin traktoruna binmeyi kabul etmezdim.

State and society always sided with the oppressor. Devlet ve toplum her zaman ezenin yaninda yer aldi. This is universal truth of this oppressive hierarchical system. Bu baskici hiyerarsik sistemin evrensel gercegidir. I will show you that my father deliberately destroyed my life just to get second wife and to prevent me to end his cruelty. Canavar babamin ikinci es almak ve yanlisina dur dememi engellemek icin bile bile hayatimi yaktigini gosterecegim. My father Resat Iskender is very successful in this oppressive fascist misogynist hierarchical system. Babam Resat Iskender bu baskici fasist kadin dusmani hiyerarsik sistemde cok basarili. My father is only a little imitator pawn in this cruel hierarchical fascist system. Babam bu vahsi fasist hiyerarsik sistemde sadece
bir kucuk taklitci kukladir.

My father realized in first year that I was very good in school and always forced me to be his personal hitman to distract me from school. Babam okulda cok iyi oldugumu ilk
yilda farketti ve daima beni okuldan kopartmak icin ozel tetikcisi olmam icin zorladi. He had to burn my future.Gelecegimi yakmak zorundaydi. Otherwise l could smash his evil plan. Yoksa onun hain planini yokedebilirdim. He always ordered me to be ready to hit anybody he wanted. Bana daima istedigi herhangi bir kisiyi vurmaya hazir olmami emretti. He wanted to raise me as a robotic fascist hitman. Beni bir robot fasist tetikci gibi yetistirmek istedi. He brought fascist fliers to me to read even when I was in the elementary school. Bana okumam icin daha ilkokuldayken fasist bildiriler getirirdi. These fliers came from fascist racist National Acrion Party leader CIA agent Alpaslan Turkes. Bu bildiriler fasist irkci Milliyetci Hareket Partisi lideri CIA ajani Alpaslan Turkes’ten geliyordu. In those days, Alpaslan Turkes established a fascist paramilitary commando training camp in Maden Deresi Brook Tourism Club building in our Kuyumcullu village. O gunlerde, Alpaslan Turkes koyumuz Kuyumcullu’da Maden Deresi Turizm
Kulup binasinda fasist askeri komando egitim kampi kurmustu. It was attended by 40 people training in the commando camp and its date is 29.7.1969. Komando kampina 40
kisi katilmisti ve tarihi 29.7.1969 idi. It was run by Ilyas Aslanturk who was the Sakarya Chairman of National Action Party of CIA agent Alparslan Turkes. CIA ajani
Alpaslan Turkes’in partisi MHP’nin Sakarya Il baskani Ilyas Aslanturk tarafindan yonetilmistir. Its program was similar to Nazi SS and Stormtroopers. Programi Nazi SS ve Firtina Birlikleri’ne benzer. Nazi SA, SS and Brownshirts put Hitler in power. Nazi SA, SS ve Kahverengi gomlekliler Hitleri iktidar yapan guctu. Here: Burda:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sturmabteilung. Hitler was idolized by fascist commando Gray Wolfs. Hitler, fasist komando ulkuculer tarafindan kutsallastirilmistir. I was shocked as l saw Hitler’s book Mein Kampf being exhibited constantly first time in my life at Gray Wolf center in Adapazari when I was at my second year at my high school. Lise ikinci sinifa giderken Adapazari Ulku Ocaklari merkezinde Hitler’in Kavgam kitabinin surekli teshir edildigini ilk gordugum zaman sok olmustum. After l finished first year I passed the free boarding high school test to continue my second year and lived in the student dormitory in the same yard with the Adapazari Central high school. Birinci sinifi gecince parasiz yatili sinavlarina girdim ve Adapazari Merkez Lisesi’nde ikinci sinifi parasiz yatili olarak lise ile ayni bahce icinde olan yurtta kalmaya basladim. My father pulled me from free boarding Istanbul Haydarpasa High School in my first year and brought me to Adapazari Central High School and changed my place from aunt Fadime Erturk as he said her son Yusuf Erturk is leftist to aunt Binnaz Ak. Babam parasiz yatili olarak okudugum Istanbul’daki Hadarpasa Lisesi’nden beni birinci sinifta alip Adapazari Merkez Lisesi’ne getirdi ve burda beni once Fadime Halamin yanina birakti fakat hala oglu Yusuf solcu diyerek beni buradan alip Binnaz halamin yanina birakti. My father deprived me of these opportunities for his own fascist ideology by pulling me from Haydarpasa and then Aunt Fadime’s house even though Haydarpasa free boarding was still best high school and aunt Fadime’s house was super quiet and prefect right by the high school. Haydarpasa parasiz Lisesi halen en iyi lise olmasina ragmen ve Fadime halamin evi okulun hemen yanibasinda sessiz ve mukemmel sartlarda olmasina ragmen babam kendi fasist ideolojisi nedeniyle beni bu imkanlardan mahrum etti. My father left me to aunt Binnaz forcing me to walk all the way to the other side of city. Babam beni kentin oteki ucunda oturan Binnaz halamin yanina birakti ve buradan beni okula yurumeye mecbur etti. Then my father forced me to take test and move back in the free boarding dormitory as he complained that my aunt wanted him to get my basic cloths and shoes. Ondan sonra babam halamin benim icin ustbas ve ayakkabi almak istediginden sikayet edip beni yeniden parasiz yatiliya sokmak icin imtihana soktu. My aunt Binnaz complained to me that my father always refused to get me anything arguing “these are all fantasy not a necessity” for me. Binnaz halam babamin “bunlar ihtiyac degil fantazi” diye sikayet ederek bana birsey almayi daima reddettigini bana acikladi. As I lived in the free boarding dormitory nobody would bother him for anything like that. Parasiz yatili yurtta kalmaya baslayinca boyle seyler icin hickimse babami rahatsiz edemeyecekti. Now my father got me alone in the dormitory and brainwashing me into his fascism. Artik babam beni yurtta yalniz birakiyor ve benim beynimi kendi fasizmi ile yikiyordu. My father became gray wolve as they fought against the left. Sola karsi savastiklari icin ulkucu oldu. My father himself was assaulting aunt Fadime’s son Yusuf Erturk as he was leftist. Babam kendisi Fadime halamin oglu Yusuf Erturk’e saldirip dovuyordu. From this dormitory l was waking to visit gray wolves center in the city center. Bu yurttan yuruyerek sehir merkezinde olan ulku ocagini ziyarete gidiyordum. Leaders in the gray wolf center would train me how to fight left in a paramilitary fashion. Ulku ocagindaki baskanlar beni sola karsi askeri olarak savasmak icin egitime aldilar. Gray wolves leaders would suddenly order me while l was sitting and drinking tea to join their group in a line and run outside to the streets day or night and roam the city streets like pack of wolves and watch when they assault leftist persons. Ulku ocagi baskanlari ben oturup cayimi icerken aniden kendilerine yuruyus kolunda katilmami emrederler ve disari sokaklara kosarak cikip gece veya gunduz olsun kurt surusu gibi butun kenti kosar gibi suratle dolasirken onumuze cikan solculara saldirdiklarinda ben seyrederdim. One time as l was watching a mother of the beaten youth was crying and screaming for help l was totally frozen and could move only after gray wolves ordered to escape from police dispatched to the scene. Bir keresinde seyrederken dayak yiyen bir solcu gencin annesi aciyla aglayip cigliklar atmaya baslayinca donup kaldim ve ancak ulkuculerin dagilin polis olay yerine geliyor demesiyle soktan cikabildim.

But one day when l went to see my aunt Fadime her son Yusuf Erturk told me that his comrades already came to the dormitory management and they want to be friends with me. Fakat birgun Fadime halami ziyarete gidince halamin oglu Yusuf Erturk bana yoldaslarinin coktan yurt idaresine geldiklerini ve benimle arkadaslik kurmak istediklerini soyledi. Indeed Yusuf Erturk’s comrade dormitory director spoke with me and told me their comrades are following me everywhere and they wanted me to join them. Gercekten Yusuf Erturk’un yoldasi yurt Müdürü benimle konustu ve yoldaslarinin beni heryerde takip ettiklerini ve benim de kendilerine katilmami istedi. As I told my father about this he pulled me from Adapazari to Karasu to prevent me to join the left. Bunu babama soyledigim zaman benim sola katilmami onlemek icin beni Adapazari’ndan alip Karasu’ya getirdi. Even tough I was in training with fascist gray wolves to roam the city to hunt down the leftists and this was known by the leftist dormitory director I was never hurt or directly threatened by any leftist. Fasist ulkuculer tarafindan sehirde firtina birlikleri gibi solcu avinda kosarak egitildigim halde ve bu da solcu yurt muduru tarafindan bilindigi halde hicbir solcu tarafindan saldiriya ugramadim veya tehdit edilmedim. My aunt Fadime’s son Yusuf Erturk and his comrade dormitory director tried to win my mind and heart instead of hurting me. Fadime halamin oglu Yusuf ve yoldasi yurt Müdürü benim canimi yakmak yerine beni dusuncemden ve kalbimden kazanmaya calistilar. Yusuf Erturk was telling me how powerful Soviet Russia was and dormitory director was telling me how police state tortured his comrade girl friend by raping her genital with baton. Yusuf Erturk Sovyet Rusya’nin ne kadar guclu oldugunu anlatirken yurt Müdürü de polis devletinin yoldasi kiz arkadasina copla tecavuz edip iskence yaptigini anlatiyordu. My father pulled me from Adapazari and put me in Karasu high school as he was so scared that I lived in dormitory run by a leftist director and my aunt’s leftist son Yusuf Erturk lived right by the dormitory. Babam solcu bir mudurun idare ettigi yurtta kalmamdan ve halamin solcu oglu Yusuf Erturk’un hemen yakindaki evde yasamasindan cok korktugu icin beni Adapazari’ndan alip Karasu Lisesi’ne goturdu. My father acted only to make me his fascist hitman from my birth never cared about my own well-being. Babam benim iyiligimi hicbir zaman dusunmeden sadece beni kendisinin fasist tetikcisi yapmak istedi. My father knew that if he allowed my mother live with us and care for us he would not be able to abuse and brainwash me to be his worthless hitman as he wished. Babam eger annemin bizimle yasamasina ve bize bakmasina musaade etseydi beni istedigi gibi istismar edip degersiz bir tetikci yapmak icin beynimi yikayamaycagini biliyordu. If I had mother care and love in our house l would never listen to my father ordering me to join cruel fascist gray wolves to become a fascist hitman knocking down innocent people only for their opinions. Eger evde anne bakimi ve sevkati almis olsaydim asla sadece dusunceleri yuzunden insanlari vurup deviren bir fasist tetikci olmak icin acimasiz fasist ulkuculere katilmami emreden babami dinlemezdim.

Hitler was idolized by the gray wolves even though Hitler was not a Turkish hero and was so infamous in the history! Hitler bir Turk kahramani olmamasina ve tarihte cok kotu bir sohreti olmasina ragmen ulkuculer tarafindan kutsaniyordu! But again MHP’s history is bloody too like Hitler and CIA . Fakat yine MHP’nin tarihi de Hitler ve CIA gibi kanlidir. Here: Burda: http://www.ozgurluk.info/kitaplik/webarsiv/kurtulus/www/kurtulus200004/255.html Right wing Suleyman Demirel’s Jjustice Party
government made a secret report titled MHP Report in 1970
. Sagci Suleyman Demirel hukumeti 1970 yilinda MHP Raporu adinda gizli bir rapor hazirlamistir. Fascist commando camp in Kuyumcullu was listed in article 9 in this report. Kuyumculludaki bu fasist
komando kampi bu raporda 9.cu maddede yer almistir. Here: Burda:
http://www.turktoresi.com/viewtopic.php?f=32&t=5313 CIA established MHP. MHP’yi CIA kurdu. Here: Burda: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YS82W6jcDrY&feature=relmfu Commando gray wolf camps were established by CIA. Ulkucu komando kamplari CIA tarafindan kurdurulmustur. Here: Burda: http://www.kurtulusyolu.org/gazete/tam_goster.php?fid=108&yt=2 American Ambassador confirms Alpaslan Turkes is a CIA agent! Amerikan Buyukelcisi Alpaslan Turkes’in bir CIA ajani oldugunu teyit ediyor! Here: Burda: http://haber.sol.org.tr/yazarlar/mlam-tarih-komisyonu/tarih-gecmiste-kalmamali-43775 My fasist father and granfather also established a branch of fascist idealist youth gray wolves in my Grandfather Osman Cavus’ building right across the village mosque together with fasist Turkes supporter fascist gray wolf Osman Kocmar who is son of Salih Hoja. Fasist babam ve Osman Cavus Dedem koy camisinin tam karsisinda olan kendi binalarinda fasist bozkurt ulku ocaklarinin bir subesini fasist Tukesci Salih Hocanin oglu Osman Kocmar’la birlikte kurdular. Osman Kocmar was popular as Kuyumculluspor soccer club captain and never had money problem. Osman Kocmar was Kuyumculluspor Futbol kulubunun kaptaniydi ve hicbir zaman para sorunu yasamamisti.
Here: Burda: http://www.kuyumculu.org/index.php option=com_content&task=view&id=485&Itemid=125 This fascist Turkes gray wolf youth club was right behind my paternal half uncle Hakki Iskender’s bread bakery.
Bu fasist Turkesci ulku ocagi subesi uvey Hakki Iskender amcamin islettigi ekmek firininin tam arkasindaydi. You had to walk between the village mosque and the
village bakery to see this Turkes gray wolf club
. Bu Turkesci ulku ocagini gormek icin koy camisi ile koy firini arasindan yurumeniz gerekirdi. Of course my fascist father brought me many fliers from this fascist club. Tabi fasist babam bu fasist ulku ocagindan bana bir suru bildiri getirip okuttu. Many paramilitary commandos used to go around and brainwash villagers. Gladio Turkes commandos spread fliers, books and made teahouse meetings and showed comando propaganda films in the Maden deresi brook
clubhouse
. Gladyo Turkes komandolari kahvelerde bildiri, kitap dagittilar ve toplantilar yaptilar ve hem koy meydaninda hem de maden deresi kulup binasinda propaganda filmleri
gosterdiler.

Years later in 1990 during our village beach struggle I used this same building as my
press office but my father beat me up and threatened me and expelled me from the building to destroy my justice struggle against the NATO Gladio Undersecretary Tugay Ozceri
.
Yillar sonra 1990’da koyumuzun plaj mucadelesi sirasinda ben dedemin bu binasindaki bir odayi birkac gun basin burosu olarak kullandim ama babam NATO teror orgutu Gladyo Mustesari Ozceriye karsi hak aramami engellemek icin beni orda dovdu, tehdit etti ve binadan atti. Do not forget that NATO Gladio established all these fascist paramilitary organizations around the world to use them to create false flag terrorism to scare people away from political discussion and leave it to military under American control. Unutmayin ki NATO Gladyo, halki siyasi tartismadan korkutmak ve siyaseti Amerikanci orduya terketmek icin sahte terorizm yaratmak amaciyla butun dunyada bunun gibi fasist orgutler kurdurmustu. I was roaming the Adapazari city with gray wolves to train how to knock down innocent people just for their leftist opinion to terrorize the city as part of the same CIA scenario during my high school years according to my father’s wishes and his exemplary actions. Babamin istegi ve ornek hareketleri dogrultusunda lise yillarimda ayni CIA senaryosunun bir parcasi olarak Adapazari kentini terorize etmek icin onumuze cikan masum insanlari sadece sol gorusleri yuzunden vurup indirmek amaciyla ulkuculerden egitim gormek icin Adapazarinda firtina gibi esiyordum.
My father Resat Iskender and grandfather Osman Cavus took a part as fascist pawn in this grand CIA/NATO Gladio plan and brainwashed me to be a fascist hitman and backstabbed me in my fight for justice against NATO Gladyo undersecretary when l needed most solidarity. Babam Resat Iskender ve dedem Osman Cavus bu buyuk NATO Gladyo planinda fasist piyon olarak yer aldilar ve fasist tetikci olmam icin beynimi yikadilar ve NATO Gladyo Mustesari Ozceriye karsi hak arama mucadelemde dayanismaya encok ihtiyacim oldugu anda beni arkadan vurdular. Violence and betrayal are my father Resat Iskender’s household norm. Siddet ve ihanet babamin evinde gecerli kanundur. My step mother called my father as Mud Sevket for years to mock his treacherous personality and then she used Gaddafi for his cruel iron hand lifestyle. Uvey annem babamin hain kisiligi ile alay etmek icin onu yillarca Camur Sevket diye cagirdi ve daha sonralari acimasiz diktatorce hayat tarzi icin onu Kaddafi diye cagirmisti.

lf you are against their normal you will be branded as abnormal, insane. Eger onlarin bu normaline karsi isen anormal, deli olarak damgalanirsin. If slaughter and blood-shedding is normal and you are against it they will call you insane. Eger kesim ve kan dokmek normalse ve sen buna karsiysan seni deli diye cagirirlar. If you oppose their normalcy of slaughter and blood-shedding they will lock you up for insanity. Eger onlarin kesim ve kan dokmek olan normallerine karsi koyuyorsan seni deli diye kapatirlar.
If war and destruction is normal and you oppose to it they lock you you up for disorderly conduct and insanity. Eger savas ve yok etme normalse buna karsi koydugun icin duzeni bozmaktan ve delilikten seni kapatirlar. Because they have the power to do it. Cunku bunu yapmaya gucleri vardir.

My father and stepmother never wanted a bright future for me. Babam ve uveyannem benim icin hicbir zaman parlak bir gelecek istemediler. My father always
provoked me against people he hated as a fascist.
Babam her zaman beni bir fasist olarak nefret ettigi insanlara karsi kiskirtti. My father provoked me especially my mother, maternal grandparents, maternal aunts and relative uncle Ziya Iskender. Babam beni ozellikle anneme, annemin annesine ve babaina ve kardeslerime ve Ziya Iskender amcama karsi kiskirtti. My father ordered me to beat uncle Ziya in a political debate when l was only 16. Babam ben daha 16 yasimdayken Ziya Amcami siyasi tartismada yenmemi
emretti. Uncle Ziya graduated from Istanbul Halkali Agricultural High School and was Director of State Agricultural Equipments in Karasu at the time. Ziya Amca Istanbul Halkali Ziraat Yuksek Okulundan mezundu ve o zaman Karasu Zirai Donatim Kurumu Müdürü idi. My father Resat Iskender hated Uncle Ziya and brainwashed me against uncle Ziya and his leftist sons Mujdat and Murat because uncle Ziya was educated and leftist and his mother Aunt Zekiye always criticized my father, Grandfater Osman Cavus and stepmother Hayriye for violence and deception against my mother Huriye. Babam Resat, Ziya amcadan nefret ediyordu ve Ziya amacaya karsi benim beynimi yikiyordu cunku Ziya Amca okumus ve solcuydu ve Ziya amcamin annesi Zekiye teyze Osman Cavus dedemin, babam Resat Iskender’in ve
uvey annem Hayriye’nin oz annem Huriyeye uyguladiklari siddet ve iftiralari surekli elestiriyordu. My father always complained me that my grandfather did not send him to schools after five years of elementary school while uncle Ziya enjoyed privilege of education. Babam Ziya amcamin okuma ayricaligindan yararlanirken dedemin kendisini bes yillik ilk okuldan yukari okula gondermedigini bana sikayet ederdi. My father brainwashed me by portraying himself as he was the oppressed and unfortunate poor man who was not allowed to go to schools and to marry with his own pick. Babam kendini bana okula gitme ve begendigi kizla evlenme hakki elinden alinan ezilmis ve talihsiz birisi olarak tanitip beynimi yikadi. So my father made me hate uncle Ziya for his privilege of education, profession and his leftist opinion. Yani babam okul, meslek ve dusunce ayricaligindan dolayi beni Ziya amcadan nefret ettirdi. Now my father brainwashed me so I had to act to hurt uncle Ziya for his privileges. Babam artik beynimi yikamis ve ben Ziya amcami ayricaliklarindan dolayi canini yakmak icin harekete gecmeliydim.

My father’s provocation got me into fist fight with uncle Ziya’s son Mujdat in Kuyumcullu inside Adil Kaymak’s store which estranged me from my mother’s biggest supporter aunt Zekiye unfortunately. Babamin provakosyonu sonucunda Ziya amcamin oglu Mujdatla Kuyumcullu’da Adil Kaymak’in dukkaninda dovustum bu da annemin en buyuk destekcisi
olan Zekiye teyzeden kopmama neden oldu. Now my father was very happy. Artik babam cok mutluydu. My fascist father used me to attack my own people
just to burn me and it is exactly same thing what Gladio did in the past and what it does today in Turkey and in the Middle East.
Fasist babam beni yakmak icin kendi insanlarima karsi saldirmakta kullandi ve bu Gladyonun gecmiste ve bugun Turkiyede, Orta Doguda ve dunyada yaptigi seyin aynisidir. Divide and swallow! Bol ve yut! My father especially and always spoke ill against my mother and her family to prove as if she deserved his
abuses.
Babam annemin bu eziyetleri hak ettigini ispatlamak icin ozellikle anneme ve ailesine karsi her zaman kotu konusurdu. My father brainwashed me against my own mother portraying himself as helpless unfortunate man who was forced to marry my insane mother who did not know how to live with her six children and their father and care for them. Babam kendini alti cocugu ile yasamasini ve babalariyla birlikte onlara bakmasini bilmeyen deli annemle evlenmeye mecbur edilen caresiz ve talihsiz bir adam olarak tanitarak beynimi yikadi. Because my mother was totally powerless and helpless against my all powerful father l justified all my father’s claims about her eventually to survive. Annem, tamamen guclu olan babama karsi tamamen gucsuz ve caresiz oldugu icin hayatta kalma icgudusuyle babamin annem hakkndaki tum iddialarini benimsedim. I hated my mother and her family and leftists like uncle Ziya to survive as my father brainwashed me. Babamin beynimi yikadigi gibi hayatta kalma icgudusuyle annemden, ailesinden ve Ziya amca gibi solculardan nefret ettim. But my twisted thinking process needs attention. Fakat benim carpik dusunme yapim ilgiye muhtac. Because l started thinking black as white because of survival pressure from my father. Cunku babamin hayatta kalma baskisi nedeniyle ben siyahi beyaz olarak dusunmeye baslamistim. I was thinking friends as enemies and enemies as friends and usually ignoring all of them and condemning myself to lonesomeness as I feel the twist in my thinking Dostlari dusman ve dusmanlari dost olarak dusunuyor ve dusuncemdeki carpikligi hissettigim icin genelllikle hepsini ihmal ederek kendimi yalnizliga mahkum ediyordum. This twisted thinking is mind control from my father which made me to trust the mind control of my professors in the college and authority in the Foreign Ministry and courts etc. Bu carpik dusunce babamdan gelen akil kontroludur ki Siyasal’daki, Disisleri’ndeki ve Danistay’daki otoriteye guvenmemi ve aklimi kontrol etmelerini saglamistir. However l realized that mind control is so wide spread everyone is effected by it in the capitalism. Ancak akil kontrolunun butun dunyada okadar yaygin oldugunu ve kapitalizm icinde herkesin etkilendigini farkettim. Global mind control is massive mind arrest which is why our planet is silently speeding into sixth extinction stage. Kuresel akil kontrolu cok buyuk akil tutulmasidir ki bu yuzden gezegenimiz sessizce altinci yokolma evresine hizla ilerliyor.

My father also filled me against relatives who defended social justice, equality and peace. Babam ayrica ozellikle sosyal adalet, esitlik ve baris isteyen akrabalara karsi beni kiskirtti. He was so scared from any idea against oppression. Zulme karsi cikan herturlu fikirden cok korkardi. Because he knew he was a misogynist fascist oppressor. Cunku kendisinin kadin dusmani fasist bir zalim oldugunu biliyordu. He was so afraid that I would become a revolutionary and smash his oppression. Bir devrimci olacagimdan ve zulmunu yikacagimdan cok korkmustu. Typical oppressor mind-set! Tipik zalim kafa yapisi! My father was conditioned to be like this by his own parents. Babam kendi anne ve babasi tarafindan boyle olmasi icin sartlandirilmisti. His father had hurt his first family too. Babamin babasi da ilk ailesine benzer eziyetleri yapmisti. My father’s father and mother abused and evicted his children from first wife. Babamin anne ve babasi ilk hanimdan olan cocuklarina kotu muamele yapmislar ve evden atmislardi. So my father was already conditioned to abuse woman and children by living at home. Yani babam kadin ve cocuk istismarina cocuklugunda evde yasayarak sartlanmisti.

Moreover extremely misogynist society conditioned my father. Ayrica asiri kadin dusmani toplum babamin beynini sartlamisti. In Kuyumcullu village women cannot walk through the village square let alone walking into village tea houses or showing their hair or wearing pants at any time. Kuyumcullu koyunde kadinlar kahvehanelere girmeyi veya saclarini gostermeyi veya herhangi bir zamanda pantolon giymeyi bir tarafa birakin koy meydanindan gecemezler. Kuyumcullu village women are considered as slaves and their rights can be easily taken away by their male masters. Kuyumcullu koyu kadinlari kole olarak gorulur ve yasal haklari erkek efendileri tarafindan kolaylikla alinabilir. This is all the same in all villages in Turkey. Bu Turkiye’de butun koylerde hep boyledir. If woman’s male family members cannot protect her she cannot get any protection from the state for her written legal rights because state is always there to protect the oppressor. Eger kadinin ailesinin erkek fertleri kadini korumuyorlarsa kadin kanunda yazili haklari icin devletten hicbir koruma alamaz cunku devlet daima zalimi korumak icin ordadir. Because state officials are also conditioned in the same way. Cunku devlet yetkilileri de ayni sekilde sartlanmislardir. In the towns and cities too the state works to protect the oppressor against the oppressed in more hidden ways. Kasaba ve sehirlerde de devlet daha ortulu sekilde ezilene karsi zalimi korur. State’s function to protect the oppressing powers under capitalism around the world. Dunyanin heryerinde kapitalizm altinda devletin gorevi zalim gucleri korumaktir. In the developed rich countries state does its job in more hidden ways. Gelismis zengin ulkelerde devlet bu isi daha kapali yollardan yapar.

Then my father witnessed atrocities and he was further conditioned for oppression in his military service in the Kurdish villages in the border area in Mardin province. Daha sonr babam Mardin ilinin sinir bolgesindeki kurt koylerinde askerlik yaparken vahsetlere tanik olmus ve zulum icin daha da sartlanmisti. He witnessed extreme misogyny and racism in the
area.
Bolgede asiri kadin dusmanligina ve irkciliga sahit oldu. He was a military police jeep driver. Jandarmada askeri jip soforu idi. Koylulere yapilan jandarma eziyetlerine katildi. He used to order me to immediately turn off Turkish official radio as
they announce a song from eastern Turkey.
Dogu bolgesinden bir turku calinacagi anons edilince resmi Turk radyosunu bana derhal kapattirirdi. He used to yell “are you a Kurd to listen to this”. “Sen Kurt musun bunu dinliyorsun?” diye bagirirdi. It did not matter that they all have to sing only in Turkish! Sadece hep Turkce okumak zorunda olmalari onemli degildi. It was enough that radio announces those area names. Radyonun bu bolge isimlerini anons etmesi yeterliydi. He started these racist fascist propaganda even when l was in the elementary school. Babam ben daha ilkokulda iken bu irkci fasist propagandalara basladi. My father’s fascist capitalist social conditioning says might is always right. Babamin fasist kapitalist sosyal sartlanmasi guclu olan her zaman haklidir der. He never tolerates any otherness, anything different. Hicbir otekilige, farkli olana asla musamaha etmez. This is capitalist fascist imperialist motto. Bu kapitalist fasist emperyalist slogandir. This is
global fascist brainwashing everywhere
! Bu heryerdeki kuresel fasist beyin yikamadir! His past in grandfather Osman Cavus’ house, in Kuyumcullu, Kocaali and military service made him perfect fascist capitalist. Babamin Osman Cavus dedemin evindeki, Kuyumcullu, Kocaali ve askerlik hayati onu mukemmel fasist kapitalist yapti.

Grandfather Osman Cavus ordered my aunt Zekiye’s poor husband Zeki Engin to quit his well paying union job in world famous Pasabahce Glass Factory in Istanbul because my granfather Osman Cavus argued that people use those Pasabahce glasses to drink alcoholic beverages! Osman Cavus dedem Zekiye halamin zavalli kocasi Zeki Engin enisteme Pasabahce bardaklari icki icmekte kullaniliyor diye sendikali ve dolgun ucretle calismakta oldugu Istanbul’daki dunyaca unlu Pasabahce Sise ve Cam fabrikasindaki isini birakmasini emretti. Finally Zeki Engin eniste quit his super job and went to work in Germany! Sonunda Zeki Engin
enistem super isini birakip Almanyaya calismaya gitti. When l reminded this incident to my Zeki Engin eniste in Kuyumcullu teahouse while my brother Tural Iskender present in the table Zeki Engin eniste was extremely surprised that l could remember this story. Kuyumcullu koy kahvehanesinde masada kardesim Tural Iskender varken bu olayi Zeki Engin enisteme hatirlatinca Zeki enistem bu olayi hatirlamama son derece sasirdi. Zeki Engin eniste repeated so many times “but you were so little then, I cannot believe you can remember it.” Zeki Engin eniste bircok kere “ama sen oyle kucuktun ki o zaman, bunu hatirlayabilmene inanamiyorum” dedi.

But my same fascist grandfather always backed up my uncle Yunus Iskender who was fired from his short police job for bribing terrorists in Istanbul while he was gambling in a hole and
nothing but a lifetime illegal gambling operator and loving fan for big mafia boss Alaattin Cakici.
Ama ayni fasist Osman Cavus dedem, kisa polislik mesleginden bir kahvehanede kacak
kumar oynarken teroristlere rusvet verdigi icin polislik mesleginden atilan ve hayati boyunca kacak kumarhane isletmeciligi yapan ve buyuk mafya patronu Alaattin Cakici’nin acik hayrani olan
Yunus Iskender amcami buyuk yerler, ev ve paralar vererek acikca desteklemistir. While grandfather Osman Cavus harassed poor Zeki Engin eniste for working in world famous glass factory he strongly supported his son Yunus Iskender operating illegal gambling hole all his lifetime. Osman Cavus dedem Zeki Engin enistemi dunyaca meshur Pasabahce cam fabrikasinda calistigi icin taciz ederken oglu Yunus Iskender’in hayati boyunca kacak kumarhane isletmesini tam olarak destekledi.

My grandfather Osman Cavus died in 1992. Osman Cavus dedem 1992 yilinda oldu. My brother Sezai announces from Denmark his love for my grandfather Osman Cavus in its 18th anniversary in Kuyumcullu village website in 2010. Kardesim Sezai Osman Cavus dedemin olumlu nun 18.ci yildonumunde dedeme olan sevgisini 2010’da Kuyumcullu web siteinde ilan ediyor. Here: Burda: http://www.kuyumculu.org/index.php option=com_kaybettiklerimiz&task=kb_detay&kid=253 Do not forget my father and grandfather Osman Cavus enjoyed to torture me with their money and hunger in their lifetimes. Babamin ve Osman Cavus dedemin hayatlari boyunca bana paralariyla ve aclikla iskence etmekten zevk aldiklarini unutmayin. Grandfather Osman Cavus also approved my father’s exclusion of me from his secret land sharing and ordered me to quit from my diplomatic career and to find a simple job and always supported my father in his atrocities on me to cut my justice struggle against donme ambassador undersecretary Nuzhet Kandemir and Gladio undersecretary Tugay Ozceri. Osman Cavus dedem babamin gizli yer paylasma isinden beni dislamasina da destek vermis ve Diplomatik meslek memurlugundan istifa edip basit bir ise girmemi emretmis ve donme Buyukelci Mustesar Nuzhet Kandemir and Gladyo Mustesari Tugay Ozceri’ye karsi verdigim hak mucadelesini kesmek icin yaptigi haksiz saldirilari da daima desteklemistir. If Grandfather Osman Cavus did not help my father to torture my mother my life would be a very different today. Eger Osman Cavus dedem babamin anneme iskence etmesine yardim etmeseydi bugun benim hayatim baska turlu olurdu.

It is similar to the fact that while US government finds trillions every year to go to wars it enjoys starving millions of children here in America. Bu, Amerikan hukumetinin her yil trilyonlarca dolari savaslar icin harcarken milyonlarca cocugu burda ac birakmaktan zevk almasina
benzer. This is similar that because of wrong american policies tens of millions of innocent peoples have to die in hunger and brutalities every year. Bu, yanlis Amerikan siyaseti yuzunden her yil on milyonlarca sucsuz insanin acliktan ve siddetten dolayi olmesine benzer. My father just robotically follows this imperialist rule. Babam sadece bir robot gibi bu emperyalist kurala uyar. And fascist state took up the job of blacklisting from my monster father. Ve fasist sistem mimleme isini babamdan devraldi. My father and state both collaborated all the time in blacklisting. Babam ve devlet her zaman
mimlemede isbirligi yaptilar. It is the fact that fascists and state always help each other and complete each other’s job. Su bir gercektir ki fasistler ve devlet her zaman birbirlerine yardim eder ve bir digerinin isini tamamlar.

As I was very good at elementary and middle schools I was admitted in Haydarpasa Free Boarding High School in Istanbul when I was 15 year-old. Ilk ve ortaokulda cok iyi oldugum icin 15 yasinda Istanbul’daki Haydarpasa Lisesi Parasiz Yatili’ya kabul edildim. Haydarpasa high school was best high school with amazing history and massive architecture to win best colleges with highest scores and scholarships. Haydarpasa Lisesi en iyi universitelere yuksek puanlarla burslu olarak girmek icin muthis tarihiyle ve muazzam mimarisiyle beraber Turkiye’nin en iyi lisesiydi. One day suddenly, my uncle Yunus Iskender and my aunt Rahime Gobel’s son Salim Gobel picked me up with Salim Gobel’s car and brought me back to my village Salikkaya to meet my father. Bir gun ansizin, amcam Yunus Iskender ve Rahime Gobel halamin oglu Salim Gobel beni okuldan Salimin arabasiyla alip koyumuz Salikkaya’da babamla bulusmak icin getirdiler. Uncle Yunus and Salim never said anything to me in all the way. Yunus amcam ve Salim tum yol boyunca bana
hicbirsey soylemediler. My father was so angry and yelling in commanding voice. Babam cok kizgin ve emredici tonda bagiriyordu. He said my 16 year-old sister Nezahat Iskender eloped and ordered and brainwashed me to shoot to kill her and her husband Resat Iskender together. 16 yasindaki Nezahat ablami beraber kactigi kocasi Resat Iskender ile
birlikte vurup oldurmem icin beynimi yikadi. My father Resat Iskender also ordered and brainwashed me to rape and dump my sister’s girl friend Aliye Iskender for helping my sister elope. Nezahat Iskender ablamin kacmasina yardim eden genc kiz arkadasi Aliye Iskender’i de tecavuzle kirletip atmami emretti. Aliye is daughter of Idris Iskender. Aliye Iskender, Idris Iskender’in kizidir. My father Resat Iskender said my uncle Yunus Iskender would facilitate this honor killing and rape. Babam Resat Iskender, Yunus amcamin bu cinayet ve tecavuzun uygulanmasi icin bana herturlu kolayligi temin edecegini soyledi. My father ordered and brainwashed me to be the hitman to murder my sister Nezahat and her husband Resat. Babam, Nezahat ablami ve kocasi Resat’i katletmek amaciyla tetikci olmam icin bana emir verip beynimi yikadi. He ordered and brainwashed me to be a rapist too. Tecavuzcu olmam icin de emir verip beynimi yikadi. My father perfectly proved with this action that he wanted to burn my life in the prison and then in the hell instead of bright education and career opportunities. Babam bu hareketiyle hayatimin parlak egitim ve kariyer imkanlari yerine hapislerde ve cehennemde yakmak istedigini ispatladi. This is my father’s totally destructive usual attitude to me from my birth as he cannot accept my mother’s children escape his yoke. Bu babamin tamamen yok edici olagan hareketidir cunku annemden olan cocuklarin kendisinin boyundurgundan kurtulmasina razi gelemez. That is why my father’s favorite threat to me was “l set you to yoke like an ox” Bu yuzden babamin bana yapmayi en cok sevdigi tehditi “seni okuz gibi boyunduruga kosarim” seklindeydi. Uncle Suleyman Iskender also loved very much this threat fantasizing to yoke me as an ox. Suleyman Iskender amcam da beni okuz gibi boyunduruga kosma fantazisi olan bu tehditi cok sevmisti. My father and uncle Suleyman saw me as subhuman creature due to my mother and punish me to keep me in my place. Babam ve Suleyman amcam beni annem nedeniyle insanin altinda bir yaratik olarak goruyorlar ve beni o yerde tutmak icin cezalandiriyorlardi.

However my father forgave them as he accepted the sum of money from my sister Nezahat’s new family. Ancak babam Nezahat ablamin kocasinin ailesinin teklif ettigi
parayi kabul ederek onlari affetti. I escaped my father’s trap by chance. Babamin tuzagindan sans eseri kurtuldum.I heard years later that Kamil Gobel interfered immediately and paid the ransom. Kamil Gobel’in o zaman derhal devreye girip fidye parasini odedigini yillar sonra duydum. Of course neither my father nor uncle Yunus ever informed me on this development. Tabiki ne babam Resat ne de Yunus amcam bana bu konudaki gelismeyi asla soylemediler. Nobody ever mentioned about the money until years passed . Paradan da yillar gecene kadar asla kimse sozetmedi. They kept me ready robotic hitman all the time. Beni herzaman hazir robot bir tetikci olarak tuttular. My father always brainwashed me to be his tototally worthless subhuman hitman all my life but this time he was really close to it. Babam butun hayatim boyunca beni kendinin tamamen degersiz insandan asagi degeri olan bir tetikcisi olmam icin beynimi yikamisti fakat bu sefer ablam nedeniyle amacina cok yaklasmisti. When I was in the last year of the elementary school rehearsing for my role of the ottoman sultan at the school theater my teacher hurriedly sent me to see my father.Ilkokul son sinifta okul piyesi icin osmanli padisahi rolumun sahne hazirligini yaparken ogretmenim acele olarak beni babami gormek icin carsiya yolladi. On the way they told me that my aunt Fadime’s son yellow Mehmet Erturk shot several times at my my father while he was with uncle Iskender Iskender in the village produce store. Yolda giderken babamin Iskender Iskender amcam ile manavda oldugu sirada Fadime halamin oglu sari Mehmet Erturk’un babami vurmak icin birkac kez ates ettigini ogrendim. Later I saw bullet holes in my father’s jacket. Daha sonra babamin ceketindeki kursun deliklerini gordum. My father called me from my school just to brainwash me to shoot anybody he pointed. Babam gosterdigi adami vurmam icin beynimi yikamak amaciyla beni okuldan cagirtmisti.

Another time when l was in the high school my father fought a political fight with uncle yellowhead Huseyin Iskender and forced me to be his hitman to murder yellowhead Huseyin Iskender. Birbaska seferinde ben lisedeyken babam saribas Huseyin Iskender amca ile dovusmus ve beni saribas Huseyin Iskender’i oldurmem icin tetikci olmaya zorlamisti. My father was racist capitalist fascist and used to call saribas Huseyin Iskender a Islamist “green communist”. Babam irkci kapitalist fasistti ve saribas Huseyin Iskender’e islamci “yesil komunist” diyordu. My father sent aunt Pembe Cil’s son Orhan Cil to find me and then brought me by the village fountain right across Mumin Kocmar’s tailor shop. Babam derhal Pembe halamin oglu Orhan Cil’i gonderip beni buldurmus ve birlikte cesmenin yanina Mumin Kocmar’in terzi dukkaninin onune getirmisti. Saribas Huseyin Iskender is standing inside tailor shop a few feet away and Orhan Cil was brainwashing me to shoot Saribas Huseyin Iskender for fighting with my father. Saribas Huseyin birkac metre onumde terzi dukkaninda ayakta duruyor ve Orhan Cil babamla kavga etti diyerek saribas Huseyin’i vurmam icin beynimi yikiyordu. My father was watching us from other side of square. Babam carsinin ote yanindan bizi seyrediyordu. As l remained unprovoked Orhan Cil walked me away finally. Ben sukunetimi korudugum icin sonunda Orhan Cil beni ordan goturdu. So I escaped this hitman job too. Yani bu tetikcilik isinden de kurtuldum.

But these constant hitman pressure weakened and lowered my self esteem and self confidence and increased my helplessness and powerlessness dangerously and made me to copy my abusive father’s fascist ideology as a survival strategy. Fakat bu ardi arkasi kesilmeyen tetikci baskisi benim oz saygimi ve kendime guvenimi zayiflatip azaltti ve bir hayatta kalma statejisi olarak bana kotu davranan babamin fasist ideolojiini aynen kopyalayip bana yasattirdi. I became like my father in order to survive as one who falls in the water grabs snake! Ben denize dusen adamin yilana sarilmasi gibi sanki hayatta kalmak icin babam gibi oldum. l became sometimes a nasty Mud Sevket and sometimes a nasty dictator like him to avoid my father’s wrath! Babamin belasini savusturmak icin onun gibi bazen bir Camur Sevket ve bazen de bir diktator oldum!

My father allowed my sister Nezahat’s visit after some years of banishment. Bir kac yil ziyaret yasagindan sonra babam Nezahat ablamin ziyarete gelmesine musaade etti. This case is closed except my sister Nezahat’s husband Resat Iskender kept complaining about the money they paid to my father. Nezahat ablamin kocasi Resat’in babama odedikleri ceza parasiyla ilgili devam eden sikayeti haric bu mesele kapandi. My sister’s husband and his family would never pay anything as punishment if my father Resat Iskender did not use me as a robotic hitman threat! Eger babam Resat Iskender beni robot
bir tetikci seklinde tehdit olarak kullanmamis olsa Nezahat ablamin kocasi Resat Iskender ve Resat’in ailesi asla ceza olarak hicbir sey odemezlerdi. It was ransom money to save their lives! Hayatlarini kurtarmak icin fidye parasiydi! My father Resat Iskender proved once more with this murder and rape plan that he never cared for his family members
or any human after he destroyed my mother Huriye.
Babam Resat Iskender boylece hicbir aile ferdine veya insana deger vermedigini annem Huriyeyi mahvettikten sonra bir kere
daha bu katliam ve tecavuz planiyla ispatlamis oldu. He proved that he never valued my education or my future either. Benim egitimime veya gelecegime de asla hicbir deger vermedigini ispatladi. He tried to burn me in this way. Beni bu sekilde yakmaya calisti. It was only about his money. Babam icin sadece parasi onemliydi.
He was very determined to send me to jail and then to the hell for double murders and rape. Cifte cinayet ve tecavuzden beni once hapse sonra cehenneme yollamaya cok kararliydi. I could easily get killed too in his plan. Onun planinda ben de
kolaylikla olebilirdim. I was only 15 year-old child without much sharp-shooting and hunting experience while my sister’s husband Resat was like 20 and a champion wrestler, a known
hunter and shooter.
Ben fazla keskin nisancilik ve avcilik tecrubesi olmayan sadece 15 yasinda bir cocukken Nezahat ablamin kocasi Resat 20 yaslarinda bir gures sampiyonu, bilinen
avci ve nisanciydi. My father Resat Iskender and uncle Yunus were sending me to a suicide mission. Babam Resat Iskender beni bir intihar gorevine yolluyordu.They could not dare anything like this big without my grandfather Osman Cavus’ approval. Bunun gibi buyuk hicbirseyi Osman Cavus dedemden onay almadan yapmalari mumkun degil. I believe my grandfather Osman Cavus would not send to this kind of bloody mission his beloved youngest son uncle Yunus without conferring with his other sons real uncle Fahri Iskender and
Suleyman Iskender in a secret family meeting.
Osman Cavus dedemin cok sevdigi en genc oglu olan Yunus Iskender amcami bu derece kanli bir goreve gizli bir aile meclisinde diger oz amcamlar olan Fahri Iskender ve Suleyman Iskender’e bildirmeden gondermeyecegine
inaniyorum. My real uncles are all alive and should speak the truth. Ozamcamlarin hepsi sagdir ve gercegi konusmalari gerekir. Kamil and kerimkizi Fatma Gobel’s family who interfered and paid the ransom should also speak the truth. Kamil ve kerimkizi Fatma Gobel ve ailesi gercegi konussunlar. My father had another reason for his reckless murder plan. Babamin manyak cinayet plani icin baska bir nedeni daha vardi. He realized that he could not keep torturing my mother in front of her own six children as we grow up. Aslinda biz buyuyunce anneme alti cocugunun onunde iskenceyi surduremeyecegini anladi. He used to torture my mother blaming her
insane but he knew he could not continue his lie as we grow up.
Babam deli suclamasiyla anneme iskence ediyordu ancak biz buyuyunce buna devam edemeyecegini biliyordu. My step brother Murat Iskender also came to school age and my father wanted to live near the school for him. Uvey kardesim Murat Iskender de ilk okul yasina gelmisti ve babam onun icin okula yakin oturmak istiyordu.

So he emptied our house in Salikkaya and moved away so my mother could not even come to Ses us down in Kuyumcullu village center. Bu
nedenle Salikkaya’daki evi bosaltip annemden uzaga Kuyumcullu koyu
merkezine tasindi ki oyle ki artik annem bizi gomeye gelemezdi. . Then my mother moved in the empty house in Salikkaya. Annem Salikkaya’daki bos eve yerlesti. My sister Nezahat started to help my mother and we all wanted to stay with my mother. Ablam
anneme yardim etmeye basladi ve hepimiz annemin yaninda kalmak istedik. Then my father got panicked as he never wanted six children against his new household with
stepmother.
O zaman babam alti kardesin yeni evdeki uvey anneye karsi cikmasini hic istemedigi icin panikledi. My father was afraid of losing his child slaves. Babam cocuk kolelerini kaybetmekten korktu. So he wanted to get rid of my sister who might unite six siblings with their own mother. Babam ve uvey annem alti kardesi anemle bir arada toplayabilecek olan ablamdan kurtulmak istedi. My father and stepmother arranged an underage marriage for my sister. Babam ve uvey annem ablam icin cocuk yasta anlasmali bir evlilik ayarladi. So they would punish and get rid of her by selling her to Refik Kar in Kuyumcullu she never wanted. Boylece ablami hic istemedigi Refik Kar’a Kuyumcullu’da zorla satip hem onu cezalandirmis hem de ondan kurtulmus olacaklardi. Selling child bride is widespread in Turkey with 181,000 child brides which only second after Georgia in European countries. 181 bin cocuk gelinin oldugu Turkiye’de cocuk gelin satmak yayginlasiyor, bu iste Gurcistan’dan sonra Avrupada ikinci gelen bir ulkeyiz.
Here: Burda: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/08/01/girls-are-the-worlds-forgotten-population-nine-facts-about-child-brides/ ; http://www.avrupa-postasi.com/turkiye/cocuk-gelinler-artiyor-h79651.html

However my sister Nezahat broke my father’s authority by eloping to Resat Iskender. Ancak Nezahat ablam Resat Iskender ile kacarak babamin otoritesini yikti. My father realized that my sister Nezahat’s riot will encourage a union between six children against him. Babam, ablamin bu isyaninin kendisine karsi alti kardes tarafindan bir birlik kurulmasini tesvik edecegini farketti. My sister Nezahat could not even imagine to challenge my father’s selling her to Refik Kar if she did not find the freedom in my mother’s house away from the control of my father and step mother. Nezahat ablam eger babamin ve uvey annemin kontrolunden uzak annemin evindeki ozgurlugu bulmamis olsaydi babamin kendisini bir cocuk gelin olarak Refik Kar’a satmasina karsi cikmayi hayal bile edemezdi. My mother provided freedom to my sister Nezahat to freely chose her own husband by escaping to become a property. Annem Nezahat ablamin bir mal olmaktan kurtularak serbestce kendi istedigi kocasini secmesi icin gereken ozgurlugu sagladi. My mother took so many tortures and abuses for 7 years from my father to get her house back. Annem evini geri almak icin 7 yil boyunca babamdan cok buyuk iskenceler ve eziyetler gordu. However, my sister Nezahat spent most of her visiting time with my father and step mother while she spent a little time with my mother. Ancak Nezahat ablam ziyaret zamaninin buyuk kismini babam ve uvey annemle gecirirken anneme cok az zaman ayirmistir.
Sister Nezahat’s brain is so washed she cannot even understand who saved her life. Nezahat ablamin beyni oyle yikanmis ki hayatini kimin kurtardigini anlayamiyor bile. That is why my sister Nezahat hates me to remind her that it was my father who wanted to burn her life by selling her as a property and by murdering her for challenging it! Iste bu yuzden Nezahat ablam kendisini mal gibi satarak ve buna karsi ciktigi icin katletmek suretiyle hayatini yakmak isteyen kisinin babam oldugunu hatirlattigim icin benden nefret ediyor.

My father made so murderous and dirty plan to to scare and brainwash us and society. Bizi ve toplumu korkutup beyin yikamak amaciyla bu kadar kanli ve pis plan yapti. With his plan he succeeded to disrupt our staying with our mother. Babam plani ile bizim annemle kalmamizi engellemeyi basardi.My father’s terror plan prevented
my siblings to unite!
Babamin teror plani bizim birligimizi onledi. My father used me as hitman against our own unity. Babam kendi birligimize karsi beni tetikci olarak kullandi! He terrorized us all with his horrific murder plan on my sister Nezahat. Babam ablama karsi vahsi cinayet planiyla hepimizi korkuya bogdu. What if he murders us like this? Ya bizi de boyle katlederse? Therefore, he made sure that my mother
Huriye too heard his violent plan sitting behind the open window.
Bu nedenle, acik pencerenin arkasinda oturan annem Huriye’nin de bu vahsi plani duymasini temin etti. He made his fascist capitalist terrorist propaganda. Fasist kapitalist terorist propagandasini yapti. My father Resat Iskender is a misogynist fascist kapitalist terrorist. Babam Resat Iskender kadin dusmani fasist kapitalist bir teroristtir. My father Resat Iskender
terrorized us with neighbors alike with his bloody terrorist propaganda.
Babam Resat Iskender kanli terorist propagandasiyla bizi ve tum komsulari terorize etti. Everybody in the house became zombi, a living dead. Evdeki herkes yasayan olu yani zombi oldu.
We followed whatever my father ordered without thinking. Babamin emirlerini dusunmeden yaptik. After this bloody murder plan and getting his
ransom reward my stepmother and others increased his title from nasty Mud Sevket to more pampering Gaddafi or the Colonel.
Bu kanli cinayet planindan ve odul olarak
fidye almasindan sonra uvey annem ve digerleri babam Resat Iskender’i Camur Sevket’ten yukari daha gururlandirici olan Kaddafi veya Albay diye cagirmaya basladi. My father loved it as it showed how powerful he is. Ne kadar guclu oldugunu gosterdigi icin babam bu ismini sevdi. Our house was like a military garrison. Evimiz bir askeri kisla gibiydi. My father ordered me to be fascist hitman while brainwashing all of his children against my own mother. Babam bana fasist tetikci olmami emrederken ozanneme karsi butun cocuklarinin beynini yikadi. My father’s brainwashing was really extreme. Babamin beyin yikamasi gercekten uc noktadaydi. One day neighbour Musa Kar cursed and beat my mother apparently for the reason that her cows were stuck in Musa Kar’s backyard. Birgun komsumuz Musa Kar annemin inelerinin kapisina girdigini bahane ederek anneme kufur edip dovuyor. My father and my step mother sided with Musa Kar. Babam ve uvey annem Musa Kar’in tarafini tutuyor. My mother is crying with pain but my father together with my step mother is supporting Musa. Annem acisindan agliyor fakat babam uvey annemle beraber Musa’dan yana. I spoke with my brothers and we decided to punish Musa Kar. Erkek kardeslerimle konustuk ve Musa Kar’i cezalandirmaya karar verdik. I caught Musa Kar in the Kuyumcullu village square and beat him up in front of everybody while my brothers helping for security. Karslerim guvenligi sagladi ve ben Musa Kar’i Kuyumcullu koyu meydaninda yakaladim ve herkesin icinde dovdum. My father and step mother was furious at me. Babam ve uvey annem bana cok kizdilar. My father and step mother spoke to my aunt Rahime’s son Salim Gobel who started to harass me for this incidence. Babam ve uvey annem Rahime halamin oglu Salim Gobel ile koustular ki o da bu olay yuzunden beni sikistirmaya basladi. I told Salim that Musa is mean hearted useless and lifetime wife beater and gambler but Salim got even angrier. Salime Musanin hayati boyunca karisini dovmus ve kumarci ise yaramaz kotu kalpli bir adam oldugunu soyleyince Salim bana daha da kizdi. Salim pressured me to pay for the unreal damages to his Renault car from our fight and then as I refused any damage Salim challenged me for boxing match duel at the soccer field of Kuyumculu village Salim Renault marka arabasina dovusurken zarar verdigimizi yalandan uydurup zarari odemem icin beni sikistirinca ben reddettim ve Salim de beni duello icin Kuyumcullu koyunun top sahasinda boks maci yapmaya davet etti. Here: Burda : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Renault_12 I accepted his duel and Salim drove me to soccer field and parked his car and we came out and started to dance to hit and knock each other. Ben duelloyu kabul ettim ve Salim beni arabasiyla top sahasina goturdu, arabayi park etti ve biz disari cikip birbirimizi vurup yikmak icin dans etmeye basladik. We were right across the gambling hole and everybody came out to watch our duel. Biz kacak kumarhanenin tam karsisindaydik ve herkes disari cikip bizim duellomuzu seyretmeye basladi. After a while some relatives interfered and stopped our duel. Bir muddet sonra bazi akrabalar mudahale etti ve duellomuzu durdurdu. This gambling hole has some more nasty life experience for me. Bu kacak kumarhane benim icin cok kotu baska anilari da cagristiriyor.

As I started in the college l had to visit Kuyumcullu village every weekend wasting my study time on terrible buses 24 hours round trip instead of reading and writing because my father starves me to come to him for money. Siyasal Bilgiler’e basladigim zaman babam beni ac biraktigi icin para alabilmek icin beni her hafta sonu koye gitmeye mecbur ediyor ve paha bicilmez bu zamani okuma yazma yerine gidis donus toplam 24 saatimi berbat otobuslerde geciriyordum. My father tortured me with his money and forced me to ask money for my food etc from my grandfather Osman Cavus where my aunt Mumine Ozmen was caretaker and would harass me for coming. Babam parasiyla bana iskence yapar ve yiyecek vesaire gibi temel ihtiaclarim icin Osman Cavus dedeme para istemeye beni mecbur ederdi ve dedemin hizmetine bakan Mumine Ozmen halam geldigim icin beni azarlardi.

As if this is not enough one day Cavit Iskender who already heard and warned me beforehand that my father will not help me to study, cheated me and took me from the village down to illegal gambling hole in the soccer field and put me in a terrible situation. Sanki bu yetmiyormus gibi babamin beni okutmayacagini duyup bastan bana haber veren Cavit Iskender birgun beni kandirip carsidan alip top sahasindaki kacak kumarhaneye getirdi. Cavit Iskender and Orhan Cil showed me one young gypsy woman sitting alone at the table inside the gambling hole by the wall and told me I definitely need to speak with her. Cavit Iskender ve Orhan Cil kacak kumarhanenin icinde duvarin kiyisinda bir masada yalniz oturan genc bir cingene kadini bana gostererek bana mutlaka kadinla konusmam lazim geldigini soyledi. I was shocked to see a woman first time in village gambling house in my life and sat to see what is going on. Kacak koy kumarhanesinde hayatimda ilk kez bir kadin gormenin sokunu yasadim ve ne oldugunu anlamak icin masaya oturdum. I realized that men are giving her beers to get her drunk and then abusing poor young woman sexually and they forced me to have sex with her even though I refused it. Koyun erkeklerinin zavalli kadini bira icirip sarhos ettikten sonra cinsel olarak istismar ettiklerini anladim ve reddetmeme ragmen beni kadinla cinsel iliskiye girmeye zorladilar. Cavit Iskender and his group forced me and woman outside and further forced both of us to have sex in the hazelnut field. Cavit Iskender ve arkadas grubu beni disari cikmaya zorladi ve beni kadinla cinsel iliskide bulunmak icin findik bahçesine girmeye zorladi. By the way, I never ever spoke with Cavit Iskender or his buddies about women or sex and moreover Cavit Iskender always seemed very serious man so I could not believe how he could force me to rape a drunk woman. Sirasi gelmisken Cavit Iskender ve arkadas cevresine hicbir zaman kadinlar veya cinsel iliski konusunda konusmamistik ve ustelik Cavit Iskender herzaman cok ciddi gorunen bir adamdi, bu yuzden sarhos bir kadina tecavuz etmem icin baski yapmasina inanamiyordum. But Orhan Cil is a different story. Fakat Orhan Cil ayri bir hikayedir. One day after Orhan Cil learned l won the college Orhan Cil took me from village to a bank branch in the Karasu downtown. Orhan Cil Siyasal’i kazandigimi ogredikten sonra beni koyden alip Karasuya bir banka ya goturdu. On the way Orhan Cil really begged me to make him my personal serviceman when l become a Head of Town. Orhan Cil yolda bana kaymakam olunca kendisini odacim yapmam icin yalvardi. It was hot summer time and one young woman clerk seemed to be very attractive with very light dress in the bank Sicak bir yaz gunuydu ve bankadaki bayan elemanlardan birisi cok guzeldi ve fazlasiyla acik giyinmisti. Orhan Cil just spoke with her about his account and started to brainwash me to rape this girl even before we walked outside. Orhan Cil hesabiyla ilgili kizla birsey konustu ve daha disari cikmadan bu kiza tecavuz etmem icin beynimi yikamaya basladi. More village visit also meant less humanity and more brainwashing for rape and misogyny. Daha cok koy ziyareti daha az insanlik ve tecavuz ve kadin dusmanligi icin daha cok beyin yikama demekti.

Again in around same time when l started my college my uncle Fahri Iskender’s son Fatih Iskender cheated me to go with him to the same gambling hole in the soccer field. Yine Siyasal’a basladigim ayni zamanlarda Fahri amcamin oglu Fatih lskender beni kandirip top sahasindaki kacak kumarhaneye goturdu. Fatih Iskender with other fellow villagers got a poor Kurdish young farm worker man tied up lying down in their custody around the Magaza Bridge. Fatih Iskender ile bir grup koylunun elinde Magaza koprusu yakinlarinda dogulu zavalli bir kurt tarim iscisi bagli olarak yerde yatiyordu. Finally l realized that they were torturing and beating poor man for trying to speak with one of village women. Sonunda koylulerin koyden yerli bir kadinla konusmaya calistigi icin zavalli kurt isciyi iskence edip dovduklerini farkettim. All his crime was to be a poor guest farm worker kurdish man who wanted to be friendly with a local woman. Adamin butun sucu yerli koylu bir kadinla arkadaslik teklifi yapan zavalli bir misafir dogulu kurt tarim iscisi olmakti. Fatih Iskender who got me into this horrible torture now told me go away if ever something happens my future would be burned in the prison. Beni bu korkunc iskenceye sokan Fatih Iskender simdi bana ters birsey olursa gelecegimin hapiste yanacagini soyleyerek beni uyarip gonderdi. Another horrible rape and torture training by my great fellow villagers ended with a stern warning of prison. Benim muhtesem koylulerim tarafindan verilen baska bir korkunc tecavuz ve iskence egitimi sert bir hapis uyarisiyla sona erdi. I was terribly brainwashed with horrible misogyny, racism and violence from my birth. Dogustan korkunc kadin dusmanligi, irkcilik ve siddetle beynim korkunc bir sekilde yikanmis. Threfore l am writing everyday to re-program it in my own way and reclaim my mind from controllers. Bu nedenle beynimi kontrol edenlerden onu geri kazanmak ve yeniden kendi istedigim sekilde programlamak icin hergun yaziyorum.

When I was sitting in the village teahouse in a night when I was in the village for a visit my uncle Ali Iskender’s son Ahmet Iskender said hello and sat in my table and ordered tea for us and we started to chat. Koye ziyarete geldigim biz gunun gecesinde kahvede otururken Ali Iskender amcamin oglu Ahmet Iskender selam verip masama oturdu, cay ismarlayip sohbete basladi. Ahmet Iskender was working in the Sakarya University and complained to me that he was getting troubles because of his political opinions. Suddenly my uncle Fahri Iskender’s son Fatih Iskender came to my table out of nowhere and started threatening loudly to beat Ahmet Iskender for complaining to me! Aniden Fahri Iskender amcamin oglu Fatih Iskender masama hizla geldi ve bagirarak Ali Iskender’i bana sikayetini anlattigi icin dovmekle tehdit etmeye basladi. While l was in shock for Fatih Iskender’s insane action Ahmet Iskender calmly told Fatih Iskender that we are all very closely related and there is nothing to fight and closed it. Ben Fatih Iskender’in deli hareketine sok olup bakarken Ahmet Iskender sakin bir sekilde hepimiz yakin akraba oldugumuz icin dovusmenin anlamsiz oldugunu soyleyip olayi kapatti. Ahmet Iskender is younger brother of teacher/mufti Rahmi Iskender who registered me to Haydarpasa high school and politically very close to Huseyin Iskender with whom my father had a fight and later Orhal Cil brainwashed me to shoot. Ahmet Iskender beni haydarpasa Lisesi’ne kaydeden ogretmen/Muftu Rahmi Iskender’in genc kardesiydi ve babamin kavga ettigi ve sonra Orhan Cil’i gonderip benden vurmami istedigi saribas Huseyin Iskender’in siyasi olarak destekcisiydi.

When l complained about my father who already cursed loudly and beat me up to humiliate and expel me from village in front of everybody many times in the village during beach struggle and my career campaign uncle Fahri Iskender’s oldest son Nafi Iskender threatened me to beat me if l continue to disrespect to my father . Koyden beni atmak icin herkesin icinde bana soven ve doven babamdan sonra Fahri Iskender amcamin en buyuk oglu Nafi Iskender eger babama karsi gelmeye devam edersem beni dovmekle tehdit etti. I responded to him he better kill me because I would kill him after such a thing. Ona beni oldursen senin icin daha iyi olur cunku oyle bir sey den sonra ben seni oldururum diyerek cevap verdim.

Of course uncle Fahri Iskender’s son Abdullah Iskender did not allow me to live in his house in Istanbul as roommate as he returned back to school claiming his other friends will come to 4 bedroom apartment. Tabi Fahri amcamin oglu Abdullah Iskender Istanbul’daki 4 yatak odali evinde kalmama izin vermedi ve okullar acilinca geri donup arkadaslarim gelerek diyerek beni evden atti.

As my uncle Fahri Iskender was harassing me I cannot get a visa after my 3 marches to Ankara and pay my plane tickets to USA and l told him “why do not you pay my plane tickets as you are my uncle?” Fahri Iskender amcam Ankaraya uc yuruyus yaptigim icin vize alamayacagimi ve ucak bileti paralarini odeyemeyecegimi soyleyip beni taciz edince ben de “sen amcam degil misin sen niye biletlerimi alip hediye etmiyorsun” diye cevap verdim. Immediately same day his son Fatih Iskender and Nafi Iskender came to me threatened me with bad things if I speak same way with his father. Aninda ayni gun Fatih Iskender ve Nafi Iskender bana gelip babalari ile ayni sekilde konusursam benim icin kotu olacagini soyleyip tehdit ettiler.

But when I was about to leave turkey in Istanbul my phone rung and Fatih Iskender was
wishing me a nice flight with a note that he knew he would be last person to do this.
Fakat Turkiyeden ayrilmak icin Istanbul’a gelince telefonum caldi ve Fatih Iskender bana kendisinin beni arayacak en son insan oldugunu bildigini kaydederek bana iyi yolculuklar diledi. As Fatih was in hazelnut trading and asked my car money before so I knew it was his money thing again. Fatih daha once benden findik ticareti icin para istemis oldugu icin bunun yine para icin yapilan bir telefon oldugunu biliyordum. Fatih previously tried hard to grab pmy money that I got from selling my car. Fatih arabami satmaktan gelen parami kapmak icin daha once cok ugrasmisti.

During hazelnut harvest time when I finished my high school l saw and mingled with a girl who was part of workers picking up hazelnuts for my uncle Suleyman Iskender. Findik toplama zamani liseyi bitirdigim sene Suleyman amcama findik toplayan iscilerin icinden bir kizi gordum ve konusmaya basladim. My girl’s group was from ihsaniye village of Karasu town and l saw them first on the farm tractor pulling semi trailer while my uncle Suleyman Iskender was driving them on the dirt road by our field to Ihsaniye village. Benim kizin grubu Karasu’nun Ihsaniye koyundendi ve onlari ilk kez bizim bahcenin kiyisindaki toprak yoldan Suleyman Iskender amcam onlari aksam is bitiminde ihsaniyeye geri gotururken traktor romorkunun ustunde gordum. I climbed the semi trailer loaded with freshly picked hazelnuts and workers and chatted with the girls until Ihsaniye village. Taze toplanan findik yukunun ustunde iscilerin oturdugu romorka tirmandim ve ihsaniye koyune gidene kadar kizlarla konustum. I visited my girl as she invited me following day while they pick hazel nuts. Benim kiz findik toplarken gelmemi istedigi icin ertesi gun yanlarina gittim. My uncle Suleyman Iskender forced me like a slave to work picking hazelnuts in order to speak with the girl. Suleyman Iskender amcam beni kole gibi sevdigim kizla konusmak icin findik toplayip calismaya zorladi. I did not mind pretending to pick up hazelnuts to speak with my girl but the problem was we had no privacy between so many people. Benim kizla konusabilmek icin findik topluyormus gibi yapmayi sorun etmedim ancak onca insanin icinde hicbir ozel konusma imkanimiz yoktu. After his field is finished my uncle Suleyman Iskender took the workers to pick hazelnuts for uncle Fahri Iskender where I run into trouble with his son Nafi Iskender. Suleyman Iskender amcamin bahçesi bitince iscileri findik toplamak icin Fahri Iskender amcamin bahcesine goturdu ki orda Fahri’nin oglu Nafi Iskender ile basim belaya girdi. First day Nafi Iskender called me away from people and he ordered me to give up my 14-shot browning pistol to him because it was his maternal uncle Emrullah Kocmar’s gun . Ilk gun Nafi Iskender beni insanlardan uzak bir yere cagirdi ve 14lu tabamcamin dayisi Emrullah Kocmar’s ait oldugunu ve kendisine vermemi emretti. I was bigger than him so I responded him “come and take my gun if you can”. Ben Nafi’den daha yapiliydim ve ona “gelebiliyorsan gel tabancami al” dedim. Nafi gave up grabbing my gun but ordered me to leave their territory, and threatened me as “I will shoot you if I see you here again”. Nafi tabancami almaktan vazgecti fakat yerlerinden cikmami emretti ve “bir daha seni burda gorursem vururum” diyerek beni tehdit etti. Feeling that Nafi can shoot me from my back without warning l gave up my girl without even saying goodbye. Nafinin beni habersiz arkamdan vuracaagini hissettigim icin benim kizi hoscakal bile demeden biraktim.

Soon after Nafi incident while I was hanging outside a wedding party at a house behind Mumin Kocmar’s house and between Muhsin Kocmar’s family house and my aunt Fadime’s family house Nafi’s father my uncle Fahri Iskender showed up talking to me from behind me. Nafi olayindan cok gecmeden ben terzi Mumin Kocmar’in evinin arkasinda ve Muhsin Kocmarlarin evi ile Fadime Erturk halamin evi arasindaki bir evde yapilan dugun senligini seyrederken Nafinin babasi Fahri Iskender amcam arkamdan bana dogru konusarak cikti. Uncle Fahri was trying to provoke me to destroy this wedding with my pistol arguing that they allowed music and men to see women in the same garden. Fahri amcam muzik caldigi ve erkeklerle kadinlar birbirlerini ayni bahce icinde gorebildiklerini iddia ederek bu dugunu tabancamla dagitmam amaciyla beni kiskirtmaya calisiyordu. I was in shock thinking why uncle Fahri was not provoking his own sons who always enjoy even more fancy wedding parties! Fahri amcamin neden bundan cok daha saasali dugunlere gidip eglenen kendi ogullarini kiskirtmadigini dusunerek sok olmustum.

When l was home with my siblings I was able to prevent my father and step mother to brainwash my siblings against me and even could get my brothers to beat Musa Kar for justice to my mother. Evde kardeslerimle beraberken babamin ve uvey annemin kardeslerimin beynini bana karsi yikamasini onleyebiliyordum ve hatta annemin adaleti icin Musa Kar’i dovmek amaciyla kardeslerimi yanima alabiliyordum. Then I could bring my brother Sezai Iskender to Istanbul but unfortunately he abandoned me while I was interviewing to get a busboy job in a restaurant in the grand bazaar in Istanbul. Sonra kardesim Sezai Iskender’i yanima alip Istanbul’a goturdum ama maalesef Sezai ben kapali carsidaki restorana garson yardimcisi busboy olarak ise girmek icin konusurken beni Istanbul’da yalniz birakip kacti. Even though I started to work as busboy l could not continue one more day because of my brother’s betrayal. Garson yardimcisi olarak o gun hemen ise baslamama ragmen kardesim Sezai’nin beni yuzustu birakip ihanet etmesini kaldiramadigim icin orada bir gun daha calisamadim. Here: Burda: http://www.havuzlurestaurant.com Sezai’s this betrayal in the summer of my first year in college must be the turning for my situation in our family. Siyasaldaki ilk sene sonunda yazin Sezai’nin bana yaptigi bu ihanet aile ici durumumla ilgili donum noktasidir. My sister Nezahat’s betrayed by spending most of her visitation time with my father and step mother instead of my mother who actually made my sister to escape to her freedom from property treatment. Ablam Nezahat ziyaret zamaninin cogunu kendisini mal muamelesinden kurtarip ozgurlugunu saglayan annem yerine babam ve uvey annemle gecirip ihanet etti. Sister Nezahat condemned me to starvation by accusing me like my father and step mother to break my father’s back by being burden on him during my first year in the college. Nezahat ablam Siyasal’da ilk sene babam ve uvey annem gibi beni babamin ustune yuk olup onun belini kirmakla suclayarak beni acliga mahkum etti. My sister Nezahat acted like my step mother never informed or criticized my father and brothers for secret land sharing while my mother aways urged me to ask equal share from my father. Nezhat ablam uvey annem gibi babamin kardeslerimle gizlice yer paylasmasini hicbir zaman bana haber vermedi veya bu isi elestirmezken annem babamdan esit hak istememi soyluyordu. l had to shut up my sister Kadriye by slapping her during a breakfast for relentlessly urging me like sister Nezahat and my Father to press my brothers for my share not my father. Kiz kardesim Kadriye, ablam Nezahat ve babam gibi hakkim icin babami degil kardeslerimi sikistirmam icin beni hic durmadan sikistirinca bir kahvalti sirasinda kendisini tokatla susturmaya mecbur kaldim. In this time my father was ordering and brainwashing me to hit my all of three real brothers and my brother Tural was making all kinds of threats to me in the same house. Bu sirada babam uc oz erkek kardesimi de vurmami emredip beynimi yikiyor ve kardesim Tural da ayni evde bana herturlu olum tehditini acik veya kapali yapiyordu.

After Sezai’s betrayal my father turned all of them against me too in secret ways. Sezai’nin bu ihanetten sonra babam tum kardeslerimi benim aleyhime cevirdi. My father forced my poor mother who overwhelmed and attempted to commit suicide due to my father’s cruelties, to live alone in Salikkaya for 20 years. Babam baskilarindan bunalip intihara tesebbus etmis olan zavalli annemi Salikkaya’da 20 yil yalniz yasamaya mecbur etti. My father succeeded this with our cooperation and betrayal. Babam bunu bizim isbirligimiz ve ihanetimizle basardi. He made sure that we never live with my mother. Bizim annemizin yaninda kalmamamiz icin herseyi yapti. This way my father and step
mother destroyed our honor terribly in front of all village all my lifetime by dishonoring our mother.
Babam ve uvey annem butun koyun onunde annemizi kucuk dusurerek hepimizin serefini omrum boyunca kucuk dusurdu. My siblings still support my father even after this just because they do not care about their honor. Kardeslerim onurlarini dusunmedikleri icin halen babami destekliyorlar. The secret land share and brainwashing are the real reasons. Gizli yer paylasimi ve beyin yikama asil nedenlerdir.

As l speak about brainwashing I must mention Barber Sevket incident with my father in Kuyumcullu village. Beyin yikamaktan bahsederken babamin Berber Sevket ile olayini anlatmam lazim. We had a few barber hops working in the village square and one of them was barber Sevket. Koy meydaninda birkac berber dukkani vardi ve bunlardan birisi de Berber Sevket’e aitti. My aunt Pembe’s son Orhan Cil used to hang out in barber Sevket’e shop a lot and Orhan Cil took me to barber Sevket’s shop to use to get shaved when I was in my last year at the high school. Pembe halamin oglu Orhan Cil Berber Sevket’in dukkaninda cok takilirdi ve lise son sinifta iken beni tiras olmak icin Berber Sevket’e goturen de Orhan Cil idi. In fact, Orhan Cil was shot and hit seriously by yellow Mehmet Erturk at barber Sevket’s shop some years back. Aslinda, Orhan Cil daha onceki yillarda sari Mehmet Erturk tarafindan Berber sevketin dukkaninda vurulup ciddi olarak yaralanmisti. Barber Sevket used to vote and support for left wing Prime Minister Bulent Ecevit but l never heard anything suspicious about him. Berber Sevket solcu Basbakan Bulent Ecevit’i destekler ve oyunu ona verirdi fakat bunun disinda hakkinda supheli birsey duymamistim. If there was anything wrong with barber Sevket, Orhan Cil and other relatives would not go to barber Sevket’s shop. Eger Berber Sevket’te kotu birsey olsaydi Orhan Cil ve diger akrabalar onun dukkanina gitmezdi. But my father started to order me not to get shaved by barber Sevket and to brainwash and scare me that barber Sevket would slit my throat while he was shaving me. Fakat Babam Berber Sevket’e tiras olmami yasakladi ve Berber Sevket’in tiras ederken beni bogazimdan kesip oldurecegini soyleyip beni korkutup beynimi yikadi. My father was brainwashing me violently against his leftist opponents with his lies that they are out there to cut my throat in most cruel style. Babam solcu rakiplerine karsi onlarin bogazimi en vahsi bir sekilde kesmek icin bekledikleri yalaniyla benim beynimi siddetle yikiyordu. In fact I was never hurt by my father’s opponents but I was always massively hurt by my father himself. Aslinda hicbir zaman babamin rakiplerinden zarar gormedim ama herzaman bizzat babamin kendinden cok buyuk zarar gordum. I never mean that all of the leftist people are perfect people because leftist barber Sevket raped his young apprentice ten years later and was imprisoned for it. Asla solcularin hepsi mukemmel insanlardir demek istemiyorum cunku solcu Berber Sevket bu olaydan 10 yil kadar sonra genc ciragina tecavuz etti ve hapse girdi.

My father used to listen to the “our radio” by the Communist Party of Turkey broadcasting in Turkish from Moscow almost everyday and provoke me against leftists by cursing obscenely to the our radio news. Babam Turkiye Komunist Partisi’nin Moskova’dan gelen “Bizim Radyo” yayinlarini surekli dinler ve bizim radyo haberlerine cok mustehcen soverek beni de solculara karsi kiskirtirdi. Then my father would set me up to psychological warfare against leftists by scaring me that they will hunt me down like “leftists will shoot you and knock your carrion because you are not aware of your surroundings, you should walk on the snow but hide your footprints like a fox!” Ondan sonra babam “solcular seni vurup lesini serecekler, cunku senin etrafindan haberin yok, tilki gibi karda yuruyup izini belli etmemen lazim” gibi sozlerle solcularin beni avlayacaklarini soyleyip korkutarak beni solculara karsi surekli bir psikolojik savas durumuna sokuyordu. My father’s propaganda was so powerful that l would regularly visit the village post office and fearlessly tear all leftist publications in front of postman Comez Alaattin as if I was looking for a fight with anybody who would oppose me. Babamin propagandasi o kadar kuvvetliydi ki duzenli olarak koyun postanesine gidip postaci Comez Alaattin’in gozu onunde gelen butun sol yayinlari korkusuzca yirtip sanki kavga etmek icin bana birisinin karsi cikmasini istiyordum. I was going out alone and painting gray Wolfe slogans all over the village walls and fountains while carrying a browning 14-shot pistol in my belt. Belimde 14lu Browning tabanca ile tek basima cikip koyun butun duvarlarini ve cesmelerini sabaha kadar ulkucu yazilarla dolduruyordum. When uncle Fahri Iskender’s son Nafi Iskender told me that Kurdish Ahmet’s son Yahya Bozyigit defaced my sign and shot fire in the air on village fountain by the highway at the soccer field l would shoot at their storage house with my pistol in front of everybody. Fahri Iskender amcamin oglu Nafi Iskender bana top sahasinda yol kiyisindaki koy cesmesine yazdigim yazinin Kürt Ahmet’in oglu Yahya Bozyigit tarafindan bozuldugunu soyleyince herkesin icinde Kürt Ahmet’in serenderine tabanca ile atmaya basladim.

One day I saw leftist Mustafa Tuylu who would receive regular left publications, walking to village square and I confronted him about his opinion about. my writing on walls. Birgun duzenli olarak sol yayinlara abone olan solcu Mustafa Tuylu’nun koy carsisina yuruyerek geldigini gorunce duvarlara yazdigim yazilarla ilgili dusuncesini ogrenmek icin kendisine karsi yurudum. I was 17 and Mustafa Tuylu was around 22 and fit. Ben 17 yasimda ve Mustafa Tuylu 22 yaslarinda ve atletikti. I knocked leftist Mustafa Tuylu down fast and left him as some other leftists like Zafer Iskender run to save Mustafa from my kicks. Solcu Mustafa Tuylu’yu hizla indirdim ve Zafer Iskender gibi bazi oteki solcularin tekmelemeye basladigim Mustafa’yi kurtarmaya kosmalari uzerine birakip gittim.

First person l spoke immediately was very respected old man Osman Bayramoglu who congratulated me for the clean face-to-face fight like a man andordered tea for me and chatted very friendly. Aninda ilk rastlayip konustugum kisi koyde cok sayilan Osman Bayramoglu idi ki beni yuz yuze bir erkek gibi dovustugum icin tebrik edip bana cay ismarlayip sohbet etti. I remember like today that when Osman Bayramoglu walked in the tea house back in those days all people sitting inside would immediately rise up for respect and offer their tables and get whatever he wishes. Bugun gibi hatirliyorum ki Osman Bayramoglu koy kahvesine girdigi zaman oturan butun herkes saygidan derhal ayaga kalkar ve yerlerini ona teklif eder ve ne istiyorsa ikram ederdi. Osman Bayramoglu told me he used to be master contractor in the Kuyumcullu village for the logging businesses which shipped logs from maden brook mouth to Istanbul and other places. Most villagers loved to worship money and power like this. Cogu koylu bunun gibi para ve guce tapar But in the meantime most villagers also resist against the same power when it wants to take away their village beach. Fakat ayni zamanda cogu koylu ayni iktidar koy plajini koyden almak istedigi zaman iktidara karsi direnir. Osman Bayramoglu bana Kuyumcullu koyunun kutuklerini maden deresinin agzindan Istanbul ve baska yerlere gonderen tuccarlarin koydeki muteahhiti oldugunu anlatti. His fellow villagers showed respect for his past life. Koyluleri onun gecmis hayati icin saygi gosteriyorlardi. Osman Bayramoglu told me that he is related to me from both my maternal and paternal grandparents. Osman Bayramoglu bana hem anne hem de baba tarafindan bana cok yakin akraba oldugunu soyledi. Then he took me to truck and drove me to my maternal grandparents to show me that he is real. Sonra beni pikap kamyonuna bindirip ciddiyetini gostermek icin anneannemle dedemin yanina goturdu.

Very soon after this fight while everybody was picking hazelnuts l came to village square in the evening and uncle Mithat Iskender’s son Tayyip Iskender engaged me in an intense discussion in front of Hasan and Huseyin brothers’ tea house. Bu kavgadan fazla gecmeden herkesin findik topladigi gunlerde aksam olmus ve koy carsisindaki Hasan ve Huseyin kardeslere ait kahvehanenin onunde Mithat Iskender amcamin oglu Tayyip Iskender beni acayip bir tartismayla mesgul ediyordu. Tayyip Iskender was never a gray Wolfe and even more suspicious he was very close to leftist relatives like Iskender Iskender’s sons Hakki Iskender and Omer Iskender but he was so friendly to me first time in my life. Tayyip Iskender asla bir ulkucu degildi ve dahasi Iskender Iskender amcamin ogullari solcu hakki Iskender ve Omer Iskender gibi solcularla cok samimiydi fakat hayatimda ilk kez bana boyle cok yakinlik gosteriyordu.
Yes l was going to uncle Mithat Iskender’s house and field but l went to spend time with a woman worker who I spoke but not Tayyip himself and Tayyip was away from me in another world.
Evet Mithat amcamin evine ve tarlasina gidiyordum ama ben onunla degil begendigim bayan isci ile konusmaya gidiyordum ve Tayyip benden uzak ayri bir alemdeydi. I heard a pistol cock click and big bang to my head from behind. Arkamdan bir tabanca horozunun sesini duydum ve sonra arkadan basima cok sert bir darbe geldi. I turned and l saw Mustafa Tuylu with a gun in his hand and tackled him down. Donunce Mustafa Tuylu’yu elinde tabancasiyla karsimda buldum ve ustune atlayip altima aldim. While l knock Mustafa down and try to take his pistol some people like Hayati Kaymak and his father Nuri Kaymak hit me from behind to save their comrade Mustafa but Tayyip Iskender already run away. Ben solcu Mustafa’yi yere yiktim ve tabancasini almaya ugrasirken yoldasi Nuri Kaymak arkadan bana bastonla vurarak Mustafa’yi kacirdi ve bu arada Tayyip Iskender de coktan kacmisti. By the way, Nuri Kaymak’s son Hayati Kaymak was related to me as his wife is my maternal uncle Huseyin Yilmaz’s daughter as Tayyip Iskender was related to me. Yeri gelmisken, Nuri Kaymakin oglu Hayati Kaymak Huseyin dayimin kizi ile evli oldugu icin benim akrabamdi aynen Tayyip Iskender gibi. Tayyip never explained to me what happened there. Tayyip orada neler oldugunu hicbir zaman bana aciklamadi.

My father took me home with my very serious head injury instead of hospital but later neighbors sent me to hospital in Karasu. Babam basimdaki cok ciddi yaraya ragmen beni eve goturdu fakat sonra komsular beni Karasu Hastanesine yolladilar. Mustafa Tuylu took the flight that night to Denmark and did not come back many years. Mustafa Tuylu o gece ucaga atladigi gibi Danimarka’ya gitti ve uzun yillar carsida gorunmedi. My brother Sezai and Yilmaz Bas together beat up old man Nuri Kaymak that night but when my brother went to Denmark in 7 years or so he became friendly with Mustafa Tuylu betraying me again. Kardesim Sezai Iskender ile Yilmaz Bas beraber o gece Nuri Kaymak’i dovduler ama Sezai 7 yil kadar sonra Danimarka’ya gidince bana yine ihanet ederek gizlice Mustafa Tuylu ile arkadas olmus. While l was still looking for justice for Mustafa’s cowardly attempt to kill me my brother was secretly hanging out with him in Denmark. Ben Mustafanin korkakca hayatima kastederek yaptigi saldiriya karsi adalet ararken kardesim Sezai Danimarka’da Mustafa ile gizlice arkadas olmus. Sezai sold me in Denmark like he sold me in grand bazaar! Sezai, kapali carsida beni satip biraktigi gibi Danimarka’da da beni satti! Meanwhile l was in Karasu crimal court trying to follow this case and hook Mehmet Iskender was there and warned me that l military government can make trouble for me if l stir this political case. Bu arada ben Karasu ceza Mahkemesinde bu davayi takip ederken beni goren kanca Mehmet Iskender warned me that bu siyasi davayi karistirirsam askeri yonetimin bana sorun cikaracagini soyledi. Leftist Mustafa almost murdered me in a cowardly way but still enjoyed his passport and privileges travelling Denmark by the same military government and motherland party while l was denied my passport in 1984 and my rank in my military service in 1987 and my right to have diplomatic career abroad! Solcu Mustafa nerdeyse beni korkakca katletti ama yine askeri rejimin ve Anavatan Partisi’nin pasaport kullanma ve Danimarka’ya gidip gelme haklarindan yararlanirken ben 1983 yilinda pasaport alamadim, 1987 yilinda askerlik yaparken rutbemi takamadim ve kazandigim Diplomatik meslek memurlugunda yurtdisini birakin icerde bile calismak hakkini alamadim. Where is justice in this ? Adalet bunun neresinde? Even though Mustafa Tuylu was supposed to be returned back to Turkey for trial according to the convention between Turkey and Denmark but the same Karasu first instance criminal court which sentenced me to 6 months prison for using my protected freedom of expression for legal defense by writing “you are protecting communists” in my defense petition to Karasu high school principle Resat sirin , threw this return case of Mustafa Tuylu into the shelve and my father never cared about it.
Turkiye ile Danimarka o zaman var olan anlasmaya gore Mustafa Tuylu’nun yargilamasi icin geri alinmasi gerekirken Karasu asliye ceza Mahkemesi ki bana idari savunmamda korunan ifade ozgurlugumu kullanarak Karasu Lisesi muduru Resat Sirin’e “komunistleri tutuyorsun” diye savunma dilekcemde yazdigim icin 6 ay hapis cezasi verirken Mustafa Tuylu’nun iadesi dosyasini sumen altina itmis ve babam da her zamanki gibi bunu hic umursamamistir .
Here: Burda: https://eksisozluk.com/entry/5539248 As Tayyip Iskender run away while old man Nuri Kaymak attack me from behind to get Mustafa Tuylu escape, Tayyip’s brother attorney Tahir Iskender also never cared for this case. Ihtiyar Nuri Kaymak Mustafa Tuylu’nun kacmasi icin bana arkadan bastonuyla saldirirken Tayyip Iskender’in kacmasi gibi abisi avukat Tahir Iskender de bu davanin ustune yatip hicbirsey yapmamistir.

When I was in my my master class I needed a criminal record so l asked my father who involuntarily got it from the Karasu prosecutors office and mailed it to me. Master kaydim icin sabika kaydi gerekince babamdan yardim istedim ancak yardima gonulsuz duran babam zoraki Karasu savciligindan sabika kaydimi alip bana postaladi. When I looked at my criminal record I could not believe my eyes. Sabika kaydima bakinca gozlerime inanamadim. Even though more than 5 years passed since my criminal verdict the Karasu prosecutor’s office and my father together did not care about legally clearing the records according the law. Sabikamin uzerinden 5 yildan fazla zaman gecmesine ragmen Karasu Savciligi ve babam kanuna gore sabikamin silinmesi konusuna bos vermislerdi. So both Karasu Prosecutor’s office and my father cooperated to oppress me. Yani hem Karasu Savciligi hem de babam beraberce beni magdur etmek icin isbirligi yapmislardi. I had to spend all day to clear my records in Ankara in order to start my masters because of cooperation between state and my father. Devlet ile babamin arasindaki isbirligi yuzunden mastira baslamak amaciyla sabika kaydimi temizlemek icin Ankara’da butun gunumu harcadim.

http://www.ankarahaber.com/haber/Ankara-da-bitmeyen-sıra-Adli-sicil-cilesi-/82802

But same state renewed passport of Mustafa Tuylu without problem even though he was supposed to be caught and tried for attempting murder, assaulting and gravely wounding. Fakat ayni devlet cinayete tesebbus, saldiri ve agir yaralama suclarindan yakalayip yargilamasi gereken Mustafa Tuylu’nun pasaportunu sorunsuzca yenilemistir. Same state also did not even call old man Nuri Kaymak for assaulting me with his cane from my back to help Mustafa Tuylu to escape. Ayni devlet Mustafa Tuylu’nun kacmasina yardim etmek icin bana arkamdan bastonuyla vuran Nuri Kaymak’i sorguya bile cagirmamistir. My father who spied and harassed me all my life for his fascist ideology, cooperated with state on these discriminations. Hayatim boyunca fasist ideolojisi icin pesimde casusluk yapip beni ezen babam bu ayrimciliklar konusunda devletle isbirligi yapmistir. My brother Sezai who pretended helping me for justice by beating Nuri Kaymak with the help of Yilmaz Bas in the village, also cooperated with my father in these discriminations and he showed his true colors by secretly becoming friends with Mustafa Tuylu as soon as he arrived in Denmark. Koyde Yilmaz Bas’in yardimiyla Nuri Kaymak’i doverek adalet icin bana yardimci oluyormus gibi gorunen kardesim Sezai Iskender de bu ayrimciliklar konusunda babamla isbirligi yapmis ve Danimarka’ya varir varmaz Mustafa Tuylu ile gizlice arkadas olarak gercek yuzunu gostermistir. Same brothers Sezai, Tural and Sezgin, Murat and Ozcan still impose a ban on Sadi Unal and his sons Vahdet, Abdullah and Mehmet on different occasion not to enter Kuyumcullu after 22 years since their attack on us in the village! Ayni kardeslerim Sezai, Tural, Sezgin, Murat ve Ozcan ayri olaydan dolayi Sadi Unal ve ogullari Vahdet, Abdullah ve Mehmete karsi koyde bize saldirdiklari icin 22 yildan beri halen koye girme yasagi uyguluyor. When it comes to their life it is so precious but when it comes to my life it is worthless! Onlarin hayatina gelince paha bicilmez fakat benim hayatima gelince hicbir kiymeti yoktur! Meanwhile, my brothers Tural and Sezgin who always got orders from my brother Sezai as his hitmen, tortured and almost killed by beating so badly our sister Kadriye’s mentally ill husband Mehmet Yildiz for only his telling to my sister Kadriye “do not look out from window”. Ayni sirada tetikci olarak emirleri daima kardesim Sezai’den alan kardeslerim Tural ve Sezgin, sadece kizkardesim Kadriye’ye “camdan bakma” dedigi icin akil hastasi kocasi Mehmet Yildiz’i iskence ederek dove dove neredeyse olduruyorlardi. When my brothers want they can torture, almost murder, impose village ban with death threat and get away free from punishment but they will also easily be friends with people who almost killed me and went free! Benim kardeslerim istedikleri zaman iskence yapabilirler, nerdeyse oldurebilirler, olum tehdidiyle koy yasagi uygulayabilirler ve cezasiz serbest kalabilirler ama beni nerdeyse olduren ve yargidan kacip kurtulan insanlarla da rahatca dost olabilirler. My father and brothers became so hypocrites ! Benim babam ve kardeslerim bukadar iki yuzlu olmuslar!

My father killed my opportunities to enter in the universities with highest marks and scholarships without caring for me at all and without a blink in Istanbul Haydarpasa free boarding high school fearing that l might get close and friendly with leftists who gained some domination in the school as well as with my aunt Fadime’s leftist son Yusuf Erturk when I was in Adapazari Central High School and he condemned to study while starving and misery . Babam Istanbul Haydarpasa Lisesinde parasiz yatili okurken okulda biraz etki olusturan solcularla oldugu gibi Adapazari Merkez Lisesinde Fadime halamin oglu solcu Yusuf Erturk ile yakinlasip arkadas olabilecegimden korkarak benim en yuksek puanlarla burslu universiteye girme imkanlarimi beni hic dusunmeden ve gozunu kirpmadan yoketti ve beni aclik ve sefalet icinde okumaya mahkum etti. While my father was extremely jealous about my getting close with leftists he himself always enjoyed hosting and visiting my step mother Hayriye’s dear leftist brothers Mustafa and Huseyin Ozturk and having long conversations with them but always badmouthed and always showed hostility to my mildly sagci maternal grandfather and uncles. benim solcularla yakinlasmam konusunda asiri derecede kiskanc olan babam uvey annem Hayriye’nin kardesleri solcu Mustafa ve Huseyin’i misafir etmeyi veya ziyaret etmeyi ve onlarla uzun uzun sohbet etmeyi cok severdi ama benim ilimli sagci dedem ve dayimlari hep kotuler ve hep dusmanlik gosterirdi. As my father was tough on my political life why was he kept twisting in his own political life? Babam benim siyasi hayatim konusunda cok sertken nicin kendi siyasi hayati konusunda yalpalayip durdu? Why did my father get his second wife from a leftist family and enjoyed his constant close relationship with them if he was honest with his super tough to keep me disconnected from the left? Eger babam beni solculardan beni uzak tutup kopartma konusunda madem bu asiri sertliginde durusttu o zaman neden ikinci esini solcu bir aileden alip onlarla kesintisiz sicak iliskiler kurdu? While my father acted hypocritically to enjoy his marriage life he mercilessly condemned me to starve in the school. Babam kendi evlilik hayatinin tadini cikarmak icin ikiyuzlu davranirken beni okullarda acimasiz bir sekilde acliga mahkum etti. My father became so hypocrite! Benim babam bu kadar iki yuzlu olmus!

My goal to write my autobiography is to make a careful analysis of negative effects of social conditioning on my conscience and clean up my conscience from these negative effects and rebuild my conscience in a positive way. Benim Otobiyografimi yazmaktaki amacim sosyal sartlandirmalarin bilincim uzerindeki olumsuz etkilerini dikkatli bir sekilde analiz etmek ve bilincimi bu kotu etkilerden temizlemek ve bilincimi olumlu bir sekilde yeniden kurmaktir. As our personality is based on the childhood foundation we should always reinforce this foundation. Kisiligimiz cocukluk temeline dayandigi icin bu temeli herzaman guclendirmemiz gerekir. Instead of building more levels on the top of building we should reinforce the bad foundation of our building. Binanin ustune daha fazla kat cikmak yerine bozuk temeli guclendirmeliyiz. My goal here is never to hurt other people mentioned here but to show that we need to revolutionize our thinking and do similar
foundation reinforcements.
Buradaki amacim burada adi gecen insanlara zarar vermek degil tam tersine herkese dusuncemizde devrim yapma ve benimkine benzer temel guclendirmesi yapma ihtiyacinda oldugumuzu gostermektir. If some people drop trash in your garden you have to clean them and tell perpetrators stop trashing your garden. Eger bazi insanlar sizin bahcenize coplerini atiyorlarsa siz bu copleri temizlersiniz ve cop atanlara atmayin artik dersiniz. You will not quit to clean and stop them because they will get embarassed! Onlar utanacaklar diye temizlik yapmayi ve onlari durdurmayi birakmazsiniz!

Until my step mother came when I was 7 I mostly lived with my grandfather Osman Cavus household and was mostly under care of my paternal grandmother and still unmarked aunt Mumine or Binnaz as my mother was taken away to slave in the fields or to mental hospital as she was abused and tortured by my father and his family forcing her to suicide and driving her insane. 7 yasinda uvey annem gelene kadar babam ve ailesi tarafindan annem tarlalarda kole gibi calismaya zorlandigi ve kotu muamele ve iskenceyle intihar etmeye ve delirmeye zorlandigi icin cogunlukla Osman Cavus dedemin evinde yasadim ve cogunlukla baba annemin ve halen bekar olan Mumine veya Binnaz halamin bakimi altinda kaldim. My aunt Mumine was abusing and beating me for splashing water to my face when l was washing my face I was 3 or 4. Mumine halam ben yuzumu yikarken yuzume su carptigim icin bana kizip beni doverdi. My paternal grandmother forced me to take their bunch of cows from their home in new Salikkaya to old Salikkaya and also various fields in Kuyumcullu everyday like a child slave. Baba annem bir kole cocuk gibi hergun beni inek surusunu yeni Salikkayadaki veya Kuyumcullu’daki degisik tarlalara goturmeye zorlardi. My grand mother trained me to confine a young cow and a bull together inside the fenced area and beat with a stick and terrorize the unwilling young cow to get raped by the raging bull while she or other woman chanted “halim le le le” to facilitate raging bull’s rape to the young cow. Baba annem bir dana ile bir bogayi birlikte avlu icine kapatip kizgin boganin isteksiz danaya tecavuz etmesi icin beni cok egitti ve ben danayi sopayla dovup terorize ederek tecavuze zorlarken baba annem veya baska bir kadin “halim le le le” seklinde kizgin boganin danaya tecavuz etmesinicin tezahurat yaparlardi. Different neighbor women brought in their unwilling young cows to my maternal mother for forced rape with my expert help. Degisik komsu kadinlar isteksiz danalarini benim uzman yardimimla zorla tecavuz ettirmek icin baba anneme getirirlerdi. So l lived horrible experience of growing up in the same house while my mother was destroyed by abuse and torture then had early on hands on training for forced rape and animal torture from my paternal grandmother. Yani annem eziyet ve iskence ile mahvedilirken ayni evde buyumenin korkunc deneyimini yasarken siddetle tecavuz ve hayvanlara iskence konusunda erken yasta baba annemin fiili egitiminden gectim. When my grand mother died my father cried in her funeral complaining that she was died early for over-working. Babaannem oldugu zaman cenazesinde babam aglayarak onun asiri calisma yuzunden oldugunden dert yandi. On the contrary Grandfather Osman Cavus never worked except to rescue hazelnuts by husking them while sitting around a mound of wet hazelnuts which l also accompanied him almost every night whenever pouring rain wetted and messed the hazelnuts which were picked, layered for drying in the front yard . Tam tersine Osman Cavus dedem de, toplanip kurumasi icin kapinin onunde harmana serildiginde bosanan yagmurun islatip mahvettigi findiklari kurtarmak icin findik yigininin kiyisina oturup her gece benim de onunla beraber yaptigim gibi yas kabuklarini soymak haricinde asla calismamistir. It was authority hierarchy going down from Grandfather Osman Cavus to my grand mother, sons, daughters, brides, children, animals. Bu dedemden asagi dogru baba anneme, ogullarina, kizlarina ve gelinler, cocuklar ve hayvanlara dogru inen bir otorite hiyerarsisiydi. http://aitc.oregonstate.edu/grown/comm_nuts.htm; http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fındık

I was picking on defenseless animals to release my frustration from the unbearable cruelty l was born into and living through. Icine dogdugum ve yasadigim dayanilmaz eziyetin icime doldurdugu hirsi atip rahatlayabilmek icin savunmasiz hayvanlarla ugrasiyordum. When I was really young like 3 or 4 and on l was throwing big stones straight to the heads of the young cows or bulls which were difficult to control. Gercekten 3 veya 4 yasinda cok kucukken bile idaresi zor olan dana ve tosunlarin dogrudan dogruya basina nisan alarak buyuk taslar atiyordum. When my victim animal got dizzy by my stone I would get to beat their butt badly like I wanted to kill those who challenge my authority. Sanki otoriteme kafa tutanlari oldurmek istiyormusum gibi hedef aldigim hayvan attigim tasla sersemleyip kalirsa kosup kiclarini sopayla doverdim. I was so merciless over animals’ defenseless position which would quickly subdue them to my total authority. Hayvanlarin savunmasiz durumu uzerinde o kadar acimasizdim ki onlari cok kisa zamanda tamamen kontrolum altina aliyordum.

My father also used animals to train me as his hitman! Babam da beni tetikci olarak egitmek icin hayvanlari kullandi. As spring came my father told me that some cows are coming from my half uncle Hakki Iskender’s field, who was village baker and very nice to me, and are eating our hazelnut buds and ordered me to stop them when I was in the elementary school! Ben ilk okuldayken babam firincilik yapan ve bana cok yakin davranan uvey Hakki Iskender amcamin tarlasindan gelen ineklerin tarlamiza girip findik tomorcuklarini yedigini anlatip ineklere engel olmami emretti. Normally my father was supposed to fix our fences to avoid this problem but as he wanted to train and use me as hitman and hurt my own good relationship with my uncle he forced me to do something impossible for me about innocent cows. Normal olarak babamin bu sorunu onlemek icin avlularimizi tamir etmesi gerekiyordu fakat beni hem kendi tetikcisi olarak egitmek ve kullanmak icin hem de benim amcamla iyi iliskileri yikmak icin masum inekler konusunda benim icin imkansiz olan birsey yapmam amaciyla beni zorladi. What can l do except hurting the cows if I can ever catch them? Inekleri yakalasam bile onlara zarar vermek disinda ne yapabilirdim? I took a light weight ax and finally saw the cow in our field and threw the ax to cow and hit and cut its butt. Hafif baltayi aldim ve sonunda bizim tarlada inegi gordum ve baltayi inege firlattim ve isabet ettirip inegin kicini kestim. In a few days my father called me as l was released out of elementary school inside the village tea house where l saw my father is sitting with my uncle Hakki Iskender. Bir kac gun sonra babam ilkokuldan paydos olunca beni iceri kahvehaneye cagirdi ve girince Hakki Iskender amcamla oturdugunu gordum. While l was surprised to find out cow belonged to my uncle he was also equally very surprised that l could cut cow’s butt from distance as this cow was extremely smart and flighty. Ben inegin amcama ait oldugunu ogrenip sasirirken amcam da benim baltayla uzaktan bu inegin kicini kesmeme ayni derecede sasirmisti. I hit with an ax and almost killed my best uncle’s cow because of my father’s manipulation. Babamin zorlamasi sonucunda en iyi amcamin inegini baltayla vurdum ve nerdeyse olduruyordum. My father was laughing with joy as my uncle showed his surprise. Amcam saskinligini belli ettikce babam keyifle guluyordu.

When I was like 3 or 4 my grandfather Osman Cavus household in new Salikkaya there were two dogs. Ben 3 veya 4 yasimdayken Osman Cavus dedemin yeni Salikkayadaki hanesinde iki tane kopek vardi. Older dog was white and his name was Whitebird. Yaslica olan beyazdi ve adi da Akkus idi. Younger was brown and his name was Arab. Genc olan kahverenkliydi ve onun adi da Arap’ti. Of course dogs were never allowed to get in the house in rural Turkey like according to Islam. Tabi Islam dinine gore kopekler asla eve alinmazdi. Nobody really made them any dog house too. Hic kimse onlara kopek kulubesi de yapmadi. They slept wherever they could to survive. Hayatta kalabilmek icin nerede uyuyabilirlerse orda uyurlardi. They get dog slush if they are lucky. Eger sansliysalar kopek yali yerlerdi. Dog slush was made by boiling grains available in the house. Kopek yali evde bulunan bulgur ve arpa ve unlardan kaynatilarak yapilir. One day during summer time our dog Arab did not know rules like Whitebird and was getting close and barking at Rifat Iskender while he was walking to Kuyumcullu and Rifat drew his pistol and pointed it to Arab ready to kill poor dog who never bit anybody instead of using a stick. Arap genc oldugundan Akkus gibi kurallari bilmiyordu ve yoldan Kuyumculluya dogru yuruyerek giden Rifat Iskender’e dogru yaklasip havlamaya baslayinca Rifat eline bir sopa almak yerine belinden tabancasini cekip hic bir kimseyi isirmamis olan zavalli Arap’a dogrulttu. I was so scared as a child that Rifat would shoot Arab for doing no harm except trying to protect his territory. Bir cocuk olarak Rifatin bizim evi kollamaktan baska birsey bilmeyen Arap’i vuracagini dusunup cok korktum. Witnessing Rifat to point a gun to a poor dog who was only doing his everyday common job impacted me badly that animal life is worthless. Herzamanki olagan isini yapan zavalli bir kopege silah dogrultan Rifat seyretmek hayvan caninin degersiz oldugu seklinde beni cok etkiledi. Nobody in the house seemed they would really care if Arab was shot . Evdeki hickimse Arap’in vurlumasini umursamis gorunmuyordu. Arab was considered so worthless and would not even get a decent funeral for dying unjustly to protect everybody in the house. Arap o kadar degersiz goruluyordu ki evdeki herkesi korumak icin pisipisine olse bile adam gibi bir cenazesi bile yapilmayacakti. Nobody ever spoke with Rifat why draws his gun to innocent Arab like a madman instead of walking with a stick like everybody else. Hickimse Rifat’a neden herkes gibi bir sopayla yurumek yerine masum Arap’a deli gibi tabanca cektigini sormadi.

When I was in the first year my middle school in Kocaali a homeless puppy started to follow me so I picked him up and carried him as l was walking home in the evening from right by the brook bridge area in new neighborhood of Kocaali and all the way to home in new Salikkaya. Kocaali Ortaokulunda birinci siniftayken Kocaali Yenimahalle dere koprusune cok yakin bir yerde evsiz yavru bir kopek pesime takilinca onu kucagima alip onca yoldan yeni Salikkaya’daki eve getirdim. Here: Burda: http://medyabar.com/haber/54599/kocaalide-kepce-vuruldu.aspx Even though I loved the poor puppy and was feeding him my father and step mother yelled at me to throw him to somewhere to punish me for caring and feeding to poor homeless puppy. Zavalli yavruyu sevmeme ve yedirmeme ragmen babam ve uvey annem evsiz zavalli bir yavru kopege sahip ciktigim icin bana bagirip kizdilar ve evsiz zavalli yavruyu goturup bir yere atmami emrettiler. I did not trust anybody so l kept the puppy underneath my grandfather Osman Cavus’ home while I went to school Kimseye guvenemedigim icin yavru kopegi Osman Cavus dedemin evinin altina birakip okula gittim. Uncle Suleyman Iskender was living upstairs with his family and downstairs where my grandfather Osman Cavus lived in the summers, was empty as he moved to winter house in Kuyumcullu center for the season. Suleyman Iskender amcam ailesiyle evin ust katinda oturuyor ve Kuyumcullu merkezindeki kislik evine gecen dedemin yazlik kullandigi alt kat bos duruyordu. When returned back from school and tried to get my puppy friend in the evening my uncle Suleyman Iskender who was waiting for me, trapped me and tortured me by hanging me from ears until they bleed and threatened me to hang me to the ceiling from my genitals for leaving the poor puppy to his house as he got the info from my step mother. Aksam okuldan donunce yavru kopek arkadasima ulasmaya calisirken beni bekleyen Suleyman Iskender amcam beni tuzaga dusurup yakaladi ve uvey annemden bilgiyi aldigi icin zavalli yavruyu evine biraktigim icin kanatana kadar kulaklarimdan yukari asti ve beni cinsel organlarimdan tavana asmakla tehdit etti.

As l started to study in the Istanbul Haydarpasa free boarding high school l was fascinated with the outstanding architecture of the school and secretly started to investigate its building during weekends as l had no family member to visit me or l had nobody to visit to or no money to even get a bus or cross the Bosphorus . Istanbul’da Haydarpasa Lisesi’nde parasiz okumaya basladigim zaman okulun muhtesem binasina hayran oldum ve ne beni ziyarete gelen aile fertlerim, ne de ziyarete gidecegim hickimsem olmadigi ve nede otobuse veya Bogazi gecmeye param olmadigi icin hafta sonlari binayi ve cevreyi gizlice incelemeye basladim. I stayed with one of my boarding student friends overnight only one night in his family house in a very poor neighborhood . Yatili ogrenci arkadaslardan birisinin cok fakir bir mahalledeki evinde ancak bir gece misafir kaldim. Meanwhile school mate Huseyin Erol was staying out almost every weekend with his relatives. Bu sirada okul arkadasim Huseyin Erol hemen hemen her hafta sonu akrabalarinda geciriyordu. Huseyin Erol’s family paid his boarding in Haydarpasa and got him a house to study in Adapazari while my father and grandfather built big houses and killed my free boarding opportunity in Haydarpasa and tortured me between places all my life . Huseyin Erol’un ailesi Haydarpasa’da parali yatili ucreti odedi ve Huseyin okunsun diye Adapazari’nda ozel ev tutarken benim babam ve dedemler buyuk binalar dikerken beni Haydarpasadaki parasiz yatilidan cikarip onun bunun evinde perisan ettiler.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haydarpaşa; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bosphorus While investigating our amazing school building l found a pigeon family in an empty attic room. Muhtesem okul binamizi incelerken cati katinda dolu bos bir odada yasayan bir guvercin ailesi buldum. Even though l was very soft and kind to puppy back in my village I felt terrible here and mad as l watched a totally independent and carefree pigeons living together happily. Koyde yavru kopege karsi yumusak ve sevkatli olmama ragmen burda guvercilerin insanlardan tamamen bagimsiz ve serbest mutlu bir sekilde yasadiklarini seyrederken kendimi korkunc hissettim ve kizdim. I was so angry at myself thinking birds make it much better than I did! Kuslarin benden cok daha iyi yasadiklarini dusunerek kendime cok kizdim. I was stuck as my hands were all tied up like a helples prisoner in a bottomless pit while birds were totally free. Ben dipsiz kuyuda elleri kollari bagli bir mahpus gibi caresiz dururken kuslar tamamen ozgurdu. While l had nobody to contact birds were chirping, singing and playing with each other constantly. Benim gorusecek hickimsem yokken kuslar civil civil otup sarki soyleyerek birbirleriyle oynuyorlardi. I felt like they were mocking with my misery. Benim sefil durumumla alay ettiklerini hissettim. Those pigeons were not like helpless homeless poor puppy who needed my care and friendship. Bu guvercinler benim ilgime ve arkadasligima muhtac olan caresiz yuvasiz zavalli kopek yavrusu gibi degillerdi. I saw myself in that poor puppy. O zavalli kopek yavrusunda ben kendi kendimi gormustum. But now l saw my stepmother in pigeons who always mock my helplessness. Fakat simdi guvercinlere bakinca herzaman caresizligimle alay edip eglenen uvey annemi goruyordum.
I could not bear my helplessness and feel like my step mother is mocking my helplessness any more I needed to feel sense of powerful so l threw sticks to them and beat them until I felt that were totally equal in misery. Caresizligime ve uvey annemin caresizligimle alay etmesine daha fazla dayanamadim, kendimi caresizlik duygusudan kurtarmam lazimdi bu nedenle sefalette esit olana kadar kaptigim sopalari kuslara atip denk getirdiklerimi dovdum. I felt powerful and relaxed like l punished my stepmother. Sanki uvey annemi cezalandirmis gibi kendimi guclu hissettim ve rahatladim. I wish l found a pigeon who was pushed around and wounded by its own kind like myself who totally needed my help. Keske oteki guvercinlerin yaraladigi ve bana tamamen ihtiyaci olan yani kendim gibi yarali ve muhtac bir guvercin bulsaydim. I wish I never had such a terrible experience my school Haydarpasa but had a wonderful experience like my puppy back in my village! Keske okulum Haydarpasa’da boyle sine korkunc bir deneyim yerine koydeki yavru kopegim gibi harika bir deneyim yasasaydim.

Sadly but when l graduated from high school I mercilessly shot a German Shepard dog while he was eating feces from our sewage under our bathroom window in the house which belonged to Hasan Gobel. Uzucu fakat liseyi bitirdigim zaman oturdugumuz Hasan Gobel’e ait olan evin banyo penceresinin altinda lagimdan diski yerken bir kurt kopegini acimadan vurdum. When l saw the German Shepard by chance l run and grabbed my father’s Parabellum pistol and marked on the top of the poor dog and fired one shot which killed him instantly. Kurt kopegini tesadufen gordugum zaman kosup babamin barabelli tabancasini yatagin altindan kaptim ve yukardan asagi zavalli kopegin basina nisan alip tek kursunla zavalli kopegi aninda oldurdum. Immediately everybody started to run around trying to see who shot who. Derhal Kim kimi vurdu diye anlayabilmek icin herkes bir panikle ve kosusturmaya basladi. A few days ago my stepmother drew the same gun and pointed it to my chest threatening to shoot me. Birkac gun once uvey annem ayni tabancayi evin ic merdivenlerinde bana cekerek gogsume nisan alarak beni vurmakla tehdit etmisti. I deterred my stepmother by responding “if you shoot me you will go to prison then what will happen to your three children . Uvey annemi “beni vurursan hapse gideceksin, uc cocuguna ne olacak?” diyerek caydirmistim. Now l mercilessly shot the shit eating poor German Shepard dog as a symbol and response to my step mother. Simdi diski yiyen zavalli kurt kopegini bir sembol olarak ve uvey annemin tehdidine cevap olarak acimadan vurmustum. My father and step mother were so panicked and running into house to see if l shot their beloved children. Babam ve uvey annem buyuk panikle sevgili uvey kardeslerimi vurup vurmadigimi anlamak icin eve kostular. My father was so mad and yelled at me to drag away the poor dead dog and did not allow my brothers help to cut down my newly acquired sense of power over my brothers. Babam bana cok kizmisti ve bagirarak zavalli olu kopegi surukleyerek goturmemi emretti ve kardesleuzerinde kazandigim etkiyi kirmak icin benimle gelip yardim etmelerine engel oldu. My father was shaken and so angry because l symbolically showed my brothers that we can stop my father’s oppression by gun power. Babam sarsilmis ve cok kizmisti cunku ben babamin ve uvey annemin zulmunu silah gucuyle durdurabilecegimizi gostermistim. Animal abuse is a practice before crime on humans. Hayvanlara eziyet insanlara karsi islenen suclardan once yapilan bir alistirmadir. Whenever l found opportunity I would commit revenge crimes against anybody who hurt me and my family if I did not go to school. Eger okula gitmemis olsaydim firsatini buldugum anda aileme kotuluk yapanlara karsi intikam suclari isleyecektim. Here: Burda: http://www.animalliberationfront.com/Philosophy/AbuseLinked/Abuse-serialkillers.htm

When l started to study in the college l was so mad at seeing a lady walking her poodle dog with a leash near my college and I cursed at her Siyasal’da okumaya baslayinca. Okulun yakininda ana caddede hayatimda ilk kez kanis kopegini gezdiren bir bayan gorunce cok kizdim ve kendisine sovdum. I thought that I myself was the oppressed one wounded by my family deserving her kindness not that spoiled poodle. I thought ailem tarafindan yaralanan mazlumun benim kendimin oldugunu, bayanin ilgisine simarik kanis kopeginin degil benim layik oldugumu dusunuyordum. I never heard anything about total liberation and that animals are better than humans.Topyekun kurtulus ve hayvanlarin insanlardan daha iyi olduklari konularinda hic birsey duymamistim.

While I was making my marches to Ankara my mother informed me that her little puppy in her house in new Salikkaya was sick with constipation and wanted me to help him. Ankaraya yuruyusler yaptigim zamanlarda annemin yeni Salikkaya’daki evinde baktigi yavru kopegin kabizliktan rahatsiz oldugunu anlatip yavruyu yardimci olmami istedi. I tried help the poor puppy to move his bowels by giving cotton oil but it did not work and instead of trying to enema l gave him more oil after I could not save him. Zavalli kopek yavrusuna diski yapmasini saglamak icin biraz pamuk yagi icirdim ancak bunun bir faydasi olmayinca lavman yapmak yerine biraz daha yag icirdim ve bundan sonra yavruyu kurtaramadim. I wish I asked for better advise in those days instead of following my wrong opinion. Keske kendi yanlis fikrimi takip etmek yerine daha iyi bir tavsiye ogrenseydim. It was so obvious that we disi not pay attention to the life of this poor puppy. Zavalli yavru kopegin hayatina hic onem vermedigimiz cok acikti. Puppy was my mother’s baby and my brothers did not even look once. Yavru annemin bebegi sayilirdi ama kardeslerim hic donup bakmadilar bile. When it comes to their own baby they go to doctor everyday but when it comes to my mother’s puppy they never care. Kendi bebekleri olursa hergun doktora giderler ama annemin yavrusu olunca hic donup bakmazlar. My brothers live like a king with my mother’s hazelnut fields and house but never cared for her puppy. Kardeslerim annemin findiklari ve evi sayesinde krallar gibi yasiyorlar ama annemin yavrusuna asla bakmiyorlar bile.

This misogynist society and fascist state acted like it is perfect and never said anything to stop this madness. Bu kadin dusmani toplum ve fasist devlet bu sanki mukemmel bir seymis gibi hareket etti ve bu manyakliga karsi tek kelime soylemedi. This same Kuyumcullu village group in Facebook banned me for writing plain truth. Bu
ayni Kuyumcullu koyu Facebook grubunda sadece gercegi yazdigim icin beni atti. They call the truth an insult! Dogruya hakaret diyorlar! My brother Sezai Iskender complains that my autobiography is execution without trial as if they are not allowed to write their version. Kardesim Sezai Iskender sanki kendisine cevap hakki verilmiyormus gibi otobiyografimin yargisiz infaz oldugundan sikayet ediyor. He is the one who gets me banned in the Kuyumcullu group. Kuyumcullu grubundan beni yasaklattiran kendisi. My father and brothers are the ones always spoke and acted between themselves in secrecy never allowing me to speak and threatened me with violence covertly which is execution without trial. Babam ve kardeslerim kendileri hep benim hic konusmama izin vermeden aralarinda gizlice konusup hareket ettiler ve yargisiz infaz seklinde beni ustu kapali sekilde siddetle tehdit ettiler. As my brothers collectively already imposed violence on my father who already brainwashed and ordered me to shoot them in response It is obvious that everybody is operating for execution without trial in terms of violence and deception. Kardeslerim beraberce zaten babama karsi siddet uyguladiklari icin ve babam da cevaben benden onlari tetikci gibi vurmam icin beynimi yikayip emir verdigi icin zaten benim ailem siddet ve aldatma kurallarina gore hareket edip yargisiz infaz yapiyor. Reporting their execution without trial is only to serve sense of justice. Onlarin yargisiz infazlarini bildirmek sadece adalet duygusuna hizmet etmektir. Other two options are acting like them or keeping silence are no justice to mankind. Oteki iki secenek onlar gibi hareket etmek veya sessiz kalmak insanliga karsi haksizlik olur. Members of society have every right to know what is happening and what is to be done for justice and peace. Toplum fertlerinin olup bitenleri ve adalet ve baris icin yapilmasi gerekenleri bilme hakki vardir. By the way all of the people mentioned in this autobiography should investigate my details as they are living in the source and write their answers online . Sirasi gelmisken bu otobiyografide adi gecen insanlarin olay yerinde yasadiklari icin verdigim ayrintilari inceleyip internette cevap yazmalari gerekir. Instead of yelling, threatening and banning these mentioned people should convince society with their evidences in writing that I am wrong. Adi gecen bu insanlarin bana bagirmak, tehdit etmek ve yasaklamak yerine delillerini yazarak benim yanlis oldugum konusunda toplumu etmeleri gerekir. This society must demand from those people in question to come with a good explanation. Bu toplumun burada sozkonusu olan insanlarin iyi bir aciklama ile gelmelerini talep etmesi lazim.

However, I want to thank here to those golden hearted women like aunt Zekiye
who always told me to end this madness
. Ancak bu manyakligi durdurmam gerektigini daima hatirlatan Zekiye teyze gibi altin kalpli kadinlara burda tesekkur etmek istiyorum.
My father and step mother were afraid so much from the critics of those golden hearted women. Babam ve uvey annem iste bu altin kalpli kadinlarin yaptigi kinamalardan cok korkuyordu. My father divided my siblings against me to stop me. Babam beni durdurmak icin oz kardeslerimi bana karsi boldu. My father tried to kill my study and my career to reduce me to a loser insane status like my mother. Babam beni annem gibi bir beceriksiz deli durumuna dusurmek icin okulumu ve istikbalimi oldurmeye calisti. My father burned me so he could call me loser insane and punish me as he wanted. Canavar babam bana beceriksiz deli diyebilmek ve istedigi gibi cezalandirabilmek icin beni yakti.
I was bolder than my other siblings because I was oldest son at home and was very good in school. Okulda cok iyi oldugum ve evde en buyuk erkek cocuk oldugum icin diger kardeslerimden daha cesurdum. Therefore my father and step mother abused me much more. Bu nedenle canavar babam ve uvey annem beni daha cok ezdiler. My father always complained my grand father did not send him to study higher than elementary school . Babam her zaman kendisini ilkokuldan yukari okula yollamadigi icin dedemden sikayet ederdi. However he never had any of my own 5 siblings into higher education. Ancak 5 oz kardesimin hicbirine liseyi bitirtmedi. He also tortured me with his money and hunger pressure while I studied. Ben okurken de parasiyla ve aclik baskisiyla bana iskence etti. He provoked all my siblings against me too. Butun kardeslerimi de bana karsi kiskirtti. My paternal uncles and aunts always supported my father in his abuse to destroy our dignity with our real mother from the beginning. Amcamlar ve halamlar babamin ozannemle birlikte bize yaptigi bu hakarete en basindan
beri destek verdiler. This was Grandfather Osman Cavus’ misogynist tradition. Bu Osman Cavus Dedemin kadin dusmani gelenegidir. But my aunt Ayse Unal was outgoing to blame the oppressed victims. Fakat Ayse halam masumu suclama konusunda son derece asiri gidiyordu. This aunt Ayse was always accusing me and my real brothers for everything she could think. Bu Ayse halam dusunebildigi her seyde beni ve oz kardeslerimi sucluyordu. She always kept complaining that my real brothers are
causing many troubles and putting my father into a lot of health issues and making him old in his young age
. Bu halam benim oz erkek kardeslerimin babami dertlere sokarak bircok saglik
sorunu yarattiklarini ve bu yuzden babami erken ihtiyarlattiklarini soyleyip dururdu. She was repeating all of my father’s first hand complaints. Ayse halam babamin
kendisine dogrudan anlattigi sikayetlerini bana tekrar ediyordu. She repeated to me whatever she heard from my father. Halam babamdan duydugunu aynen bana tekrar
ediyordu. So my father fills everybody and then they pass it to others. Yani babam cevresini dolduruyor ve onlar da otekilere aktariyor. Aunt Ayse always tried to turn me against my own brothers. Halam daima beni kendi kardeslerime karsi dondurmeye calisti. This is because my father was brainwashing his family to divide and destroy us. Bu boyle cunku babam bizi bolup parcalamak icin ailesinin beynini yikiyordu.
Aunt Ayse’s effort to fill me up was useless during middle school and high school years. Ayse halamin orta okul ve lise yillarimda beni doldurmak icin yaptigi calisma bosa gitti. But it worked on her own children. Fakat kendi cocuklari ustunde etkili oldu. My monster father destroyed my mother and us first. Canavar babam once annemi ve bizi mahvediyor. Then he goes around to blame the victims. Sonra babam gidip sucunu masumlarin ustune yikiyor. And his friends and family repeat same.
Ve dostlari ve ailesi ayni yalani tekrarliyor. This is same what US and NATO does to start wars with lies. Bu yalanlarla savas cikartan Amerika ve NATO’nun yaptigi seyin aynisidir. This aunt Ayse was so aggressive about insulting us that she brainwashed her kids an gradually her kids followed her evil example. Bu Ayse hala bize hakarette oyle asiriydi ki cocuklarinin beynini yikadi ve cocuklarina da kotu ornek oldu. My step
mother Hayriye Ozturk used to call me insane because l let my aunt Ayse’s sons Vahdet Unal and Abdullah Unal eat one or two melons in our family melon farm
. Uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk karpuz tarlamizdan Ayse halamin ogullari Vahdet Unal and Abdullah Unal’a
bir veya iki karpuz yedirdigim icin bana deli derdi. My stepmother kept spreading for years to everybody that l was insane because aunt Ayse and her sons Vahdet and Abdullah ridiculed my
melon treat and called me insane for it
. Uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk Ayse Halamin ve ogullari Vahdet ve Abdullah’in benim kendilerine karpuz ikram etmeme delilik deyip alay ettiklerini
anlatip yillarca herkese deli oldugumu anlatip durdu.

All of my paternal and maternal grand parents and their families say and act like they are Muslims. Hem anne ve hem de baba tarafimdan tum ailem musluman oldugunu soyler ve oyle davranir. However according to Islam heaven is under your mother’s feet. Ancak islama gore cennet annenizin ayaklari altindadir. Here: Burda: http://www.diyanet.gov.tr/tr/icerik/gul-yuzlu-peygamber-insanliga-rehber/6467?getEnglish= While this was Islam nobody challenged my father for his separating my mother from us. Islamda durum boyleyken hickimse babamin annemi bizden ayirmasina karsi cikmamistir. Civil laws also forbids my father from separating my mother from her children. Medeni Kanun da babamin annemi cocuklarindan ayirmasini yasaklar. So now I write this to remind everybody that if you want to go to heaven and also be good citizen you should never abuse woman, or separate a mother from her children. Yani simdi bunlari yazmamin nedeni eger cennete gitmek ve iyi vatandas olmak istiyorsaniz kadinlara eziyet etmeyin ve anneleri cocuklarindan ayirmayin. This is very important point but unfortunately none of my family members paid attention. Bu cok onemli bir nokta fakat maalesef benim aile fertlerimin hicbirisi buna dikkat etmedi. I write my autobiography to show what happens if you allow such horrible things to women, mothers and children. Eger kadinlara, annelere ve cocuklara boyle korkunc bir seyin yilmasina izin verirseniz ne olacagini gostermek icin bu otobiyografimi yaziyorum. My goal is not to hurt people but on the contrary to show them the right way to go. Amacim insanlara zarar vermek degil fakat tam tersine onlara gidilecek dogru yolu gostermektir.

My father always forced me to deny my real mother and accept my step mother as real. Babam daima kendi oz annemi inkar etmem ve uvey annemi ozmus gibi kabul etmem icin beni zorladi. From the first beginning my father always asked me “did you kiss your mother’s and paternal grandfather’s hand” when I kissed his hand during the religious holidays and brainwashed and ordered me to go home to kiss my grandfather’s and step mother’s hand and always ignored my real mother and maternal grandparents. Daha ilk basindan beri dini bayramlarda elini optugum zaman babam bana hep “annenin elini optunmu, dedenin elini optun mu” diye sorar ve beni dedemin evine ve uvey annemin oldugu eve gitmem icin beynimi yikayip emir verir ve ozannemi, annemin anne ve babasini yok sayardi. My father did this to all my siblings and created a false imagined reality and brainwashed me to ignore Islam and civil law in the same time. Babam bunu butun kardeslerime yapti ve yanlis hayali bir gerceklik yaratti ve therefore benim islami ve medeni kanunu yok saymam icin beynimi yikadi. In my lifetime we never bothered to see our mother and even if she herself came to see us we never kissed our own mother’s hand in any occasion thanks to my father! Babamin sayesinde, biz hicbir zaman annemin gormeye gitmedik ve eger annem kendisi bizi gormeye gelse bile biz hicbir zaman onun elini opmedik! My father’s family reduced my real mother’s status to zero while upgrading my step mother’s status to real mother! Babamin ailesi oz annemin derecesini sifira indirirken uvey annemin derecesini gercek annelige yukseltti.

While this madness machine worked with full speed like this I was busy in the winter to collect signatures in the Parliament in 1991 in order to return my career in the Foreign Ministry and came back to village in the summer instead of Foreign Ministry and met my brother Sezai who just came from Denmark for summer vacation too. Bu delilik makinesi boyle tam gaz calisirken ben 1991 yilinin kis mevsimini Disisleri’ne donebilmek icin Meclisteki imza kampanyasi ile gecirdim ve maalesef Disisleri yerine yazin koye dondum ve Danimarkadan yaz tatili icin donen kardesim Sezai ile konustum. My brother Sezai told me to stop signature campaign as he argued it is useless and he will not waste his money helping me for signatures or my legal struggle. Kardesim Sezai imza kampanyama bos is diyerek karsi cikti ve imza veya mahkeme mucadelesi icin bosa harcayacak parasi olmadigini soyleyip yardima yanasmadi. Instead he advised me to beg a mafia boss living in a super big house in nearby Kirazli village to help me to return to my career diplomat job. Bunun yerine komsu Kirazli koyunde cok luks bir evde oturan bir mafya babasindan Disisleri meslek memurluguma donmek icin yardim dilenmemi tavsiye etti. Brother Sezai also refused to help me to go to Denmark for a change and told me l should get there with my own means which did not exist. Kardesim Sezai degisiklik olsun diye Danimarka’ya gitmek icin bana yardim etmeyi de reddetti ve olmayan kendi imkanlarimla kendimkendime gitmem gerektigini savundu. My step mother was also mocking me like “you cannot travel outside turkey either with your own means or with the Foreign Ministry!” Uvey annem de ister kendi imkanlarimla ister Disisleri Bakanligi ile olsun hicbir sekilde yurtdisina cikamadigim” seklinde benimle alay ediyordu. My father also mocked me obscenely about traveling outside Turkey as “you will go to whit”! Babam “moka gidecen” diyerek mustehcen kufurlerle Turkiye disina seyahat konusunda benimle alay ediyordu.

Sezai was avoiding me those days because he disi not want to be bothered from my solidarity requests against Gladio undersecretary Ozceri. Sezai o gunlerde
Gladyo mustesari Ozceriye karsi yaptigim mucadelede destek taleplerimden rahatsiz olmak istemedigi icin benden surekli kaciyordu.

In fact all my family, Iskender clan and friends were running away from me to avoid my solidarity calls. Aslinda tum ailem, Iskender sulalesi ve arkadaslarim dayanisma cagrilarimi duymamak icin benden kactiyorlardi. My family developed their defense against my solidarity drive by claiming that I am insane for asking something impossible because getting my career diplomat position is impossible and therefore l am insane and not worth to
help
Ailem benim dayanisma kampanyama karsi gelistirdigi savunma taktigi ile benim Disisleri meslek memruluguna donmemin imkansiz oldugunu ve benim de imkansiz olan birseyi istedigim icin deli oldugumu ve dolayisiyla yardim etmeye degmedigimi iddia ediyordu.My father and his family run this insane propaganda. Babam ve ailesi bu manyak
propagandayi yuruttuler.

So while my brother running away from me he got in trouble with aunt Ayse’s son Vahdet
as he fought with him one night in a wedding in Karasu Holiday Site
. Yani benden kacan kardesim Sezai, Ayse halamin oglu Vahdet ile Karasu Tatil Sitesinde bir dugun eglencesinde kavga
ederek basini derde soktu Suddenly Sezai changed his mind as he got into fight. Sezai kavga edince aniden degisti. Now he wanted me together all the time! Simdi beni hep yaninda istiyordu! He needed hitman now! Tetikciye ihtiyaci vardi simdi! However I immediately visited my aunt Ayse Unal and her husband Sadi Unal to end this fight. Ancak derhal Ayse halama ve Sadi Enisteme gidip bu
kavgaya son vermelerini istedim. Aunt Ayse and her husband Sadi did not consider me serious due to my father’s propaganda campaign calling me insane. Babamin beni
deli gosteren kampanyasi yuzunden Ayse halam ve kocasi Sadi beni ciddiye almadilar. However contrary to my request my aunt Ayse’s sons Vahdet, Abdullah and Mehmet came back in a car and started shooting to murder us altogether in the middle of the Kuyumcullu village we were all sitting on the chairs in front of village tea houses.. Ancak benim ricamin tam tersine Ayse halamin ogullari Vahdet, Abdullah ve Mehmet bir arabalariyla gelip Kuyumcullu koyunun orta yerinde biz koy kahvehanesinini sandalyelerinde otururken bizi katletmek icin kursun yagdirdilar. It was around midnight and very quiet in the Kuyumcullu village square. Gece yarisi gibiydi ve Kuyumcullu koy meydani cok sesizdi. I was injured together with all of my brothers. Butun kardeslerimle birlikte ben de yaralandim. This shooting happened a year after Kuyumcullu village beach struggle, substitute teacher work at
Kocaali High School and signature campaign to return to my career diplomat job in Ankara.
Bu vurgun olayi, Kuyumcullu koyu plaji mucadelesi, Kocaali Lisesindeki vekil ogretmenlik isi,
ve Ankaradaki meslek memurluguna donmek icin yaptigim imzamkampanyam uzerinden bir yil gectikten sonra oldu. None of the attackers were injured at all. Saldirganlarin hicbiri yaralanmadi. According to my brother Sezgin it was because of my brother Sezai who made us defenseless while we were under gun fires from Unal brothers’ car. Kardesim Sezgin’e gore Unal Kardeslerin arabasindan yagan kursunlar karsisinda bizi savunmasiz birakan kardesim Sezai idi. Sezai who started the fight in the wedding party also grabbed the only pistol from brother Sezgin once Unal brothers start firing on us. Karasu’daki dugunde kavgaya baslatan Sezai koyde Unal kardesler atese baslayinca bizdeki tek tabancayi Sezgin’in elinden kapti. But like Sezai did not know how to control himself in the wedding in Karasu he also did not how to control Sezgin’s pistol therefore he almost got all of killed at once. Fakat Sezai Karasu’da dugunde kendine hakim olamadigi gibi koyde Sezgin’in tabancasina da hakim olamadi ve bu nedenle nerdeyse hepimizin birden olumune sebep oluyordu. Sezai could not even prevent my father , my uncle Yunus Iskender and his friend prosecutor Arif Karabas from charging us as attackers and my father to grab money from Unals to close the case! Sezai babamin, Yunus Iskender amcamin ve savci Arif Karabas’in bizi suclu gostermesine ve babamin davayi kapatmak icin Unallardan para almasina bile engel olamadi.

Following day in the hospital bed my father beat me up and tried to kick me out of hospital. Ertesi gun babam Hastane yataginda gelip beni dovdu ve disari atmaya calisti. He laid his crime on me. Kendi sucunu bana yukledi. His destructive propaganda with his cruel sister Ayse and my brother Tural Iskender’s greed for Mehmet Unal’s pistol and my brother Sezai’s inability for self-control altogether almost murdered us but my father still scapegoated me for these. Babamin acimasiz halamla beraber yaptigi yikici propaganda ve kardesim Tural Iskender’in Mehmet Iskender’in tabancasi icin yaptigi acgozluluk ve kardesim Sezai’nin kendisini kontrol edememesi, hepsi bir arada nerdeyse bizi katletti ama babam yine beni bunlar icin gunah kecisi olarak kullandi. He says my demand for peace from my aunt Ayse was weakness. Babam benim halama gidip yaptigim baris talebimin zayiflik oldugunu soyluyor. He told everybody that I caused this shooting with this weakness show. Bu zayiflik gosterisiyle benim bu vurguna sebep oldugumu herkese anlatti. In the culture of violence peace is considered to be show of weakness. Siddet kulturunde baris zayiflik gosterisi olarak degerlendirilir. Instead of acting as peace dove I was expected to do fight-mongering. Benden, baris guvercini olmam degil dovus kiskirticiligi yapmam beklendi. Here: Burda: http://www.bianet.org/bianet/toplum/148000-guvenlik-ve-siddet-devletin-gucunu-degil-zayifligini-gosterir

My father was covering up his destructive propaganda on my mother and my
brothers.
Anneme ve kardeslerime karsi yaptigi yikici propagandanin ustunu kapatiyor. My father Resat Iskender hides his lifetime destructive propaganda with all
grandfather Osman Cavus family targeting my mother and us.
. Babam hayati boyunca dedem Osman Cavusun tum ailesiyle birlikte benim annemi ve bizi hedef alan propagandasini
ortbas ediyor. Acvording to my brothers Sezgin and Tural my father secretly took money from my aunt Ayse’s family to sell out our case in the court. Kardeslerim Sezgin ve Tural’a gore, babam Ayse halamin tarafindan gizlice para alarak mahkemedeki davayi satti. Therefore in the court we were tried as the perpetrators not the victims who did self defense thanks to my father’s betrayal. Babamin bu ihaneti yuzunden mahkemede mesru mudafaa yapan suc kurbani olarak degil saldirgan olarak yargilandik. My paternal uncle Yunus was gambling buddy with the then Karasu prosecuter Arif Karabas . Yunus amcam, o zamanki Karasu savcisi Arif Karabas ile kumar arkadasi idi. My aunt
Ayse’s sons were rich businessmen doing construction contractual work for the state highways
. Ayse halamin cocuklari devletin yol islerinde muteahhitlik yapan zengin isadamlaridir.
When I point out this at the court which tried this shooting case I was persecuted for insulting to prosecuter Arif Karabas who was my uncle Yunus’ gambling buddy . Bu vurgun davasinin goruldugu mahkemede bunu soyleyince Yunus amcamin kumar arkadasi olan bu savci Arif Karabas’a hakaretten hakkimda ayri hakaret davasi acildi. My father beat me up for my objection against this prosecuter Arif Karabas too. Babam savci Arif Karabas’a yaptigim itirazim icin de beni dovdu. But my aunt Ayse’s family money could not buy everything so they were banned to come to Kuyumcullu village. Fakat halamin ailesinin parasi herseyi satin alamadi ve bu yuzden Kuyumcullu koyune gelmeleri kardeslerim tarafindan yasaklandi. My aunt Ayse tried to lift this ban by sending me some relatives and friends but l said you dishonored me in the beginning which cut all my power before my family. Ayse halam bana bazi akrabalar ve arkadaslar gondererek bu yasagi kaldirmaya calisti fakat ben en bastan beni kucuk dusurerek ailem onunde butun gucumu bitirdin dedim. I had no power to lift the ban due to my father and my aunt Ayse’ attitude in the outset. Babamin ve Ayse halamin bastaki tavri yuzunden bu yasagi kaldirmaya benim gucum yetmez. Aunt Ayse dug her own hole by dishonoring my peace initiative and twisting whole shape of the case by bribery! Ayse halam benim baris girisimimi reddetmekle ve rusvet vererek davanin seklini bile tam tersine degistirerek kendi kuyusunu kendi kazdi. When l passes aunt Ayse’s message and my answer to my brothers Tural and Sezgin they told me to stay out of this affair! Ayse halamin haberini ve benim cevabimi kardeslerim Tural ve Sezgin’e soyledigim zaman bana bu ise karismamami soylediler. My brother Sezai told me in Denmark that he is the elder brother over me because he is the winner and I am the loser and explained that he is the one keeping this ban on aunt Ayse’s family. Kardesim Sezai Danimarka’da bana kendisinin kazanan benim kaybeden oldugumdan dolayi kendisinin benim uzerimde agbim oldugunu soyleyerek bana hakaret etti ve Ayse halamin cocuklarina karsi koye gelme yasagini kendisinin uygulattigini anlatti. My brother Sezai made everything to see and insult me as loser in his home in Denmark. Kardesim Sezai Danimarkadaki evinde beni beceriksiz olarak gormek ve hakaret etmek icin herseyi yapti. Sezai who caused this shooting incident, did not even let me speak my opinion about it in which he got me almost killed. Bu vurgun olayina sebep olan ve beni bu olayda nerdeyse oldurten Sezai bana olayla ilgili soz hakki bile vermiyordu.

My brothers Tural and Sezgin said if l stay with my mother and work for them l can benefit from my mother’s hazelnut field. Kardeslerim Tural ve Sezgin eger koyde kalirsam ve calisirsam annemin findiklarindan yararlanabilecegimi soylediler. But I do not accept them to be my elder brothers to boss me around as they already did. Fakat ben kucuk kardeslerimin yaptiklari gibi bana abilik taslayip basima patron kesilmelerine razi olmadim. Who are you to tell me not to speak with my aunt Ayse as she begged for peace and died from cancer? Baris icin yalvaran ve kanserden olen Ayse halamla konusma diyecek kimsin sen? How dare can you insult me by calling me your are my elder brother and I have to take orders from you because you are winner? Hangi cesaretle ben kazandim diye sen benim abim oluyorsun ve emirleri ben veriyorum diye bana hakaret ediyorsun. Is this a mafia family? Bu bir mafya ailesi mi? Why are you acting like hostile brothers who fought each other all the time? Neden sanki hep birbirine karsi savasan dusman kardesler gibi hareket ediyorsunuz? I never accepted any defeat against any injustice on personal or political levels! Kisisel veya siyasal diuzeylerde asla herhangi bir yenilgi kabul etmedim ben. You are not defeated unless you accept it! Yenilgiyi kabullenmedikce yenilmis sayilmazsin! My autobiography is resistance against injustice by itself. Otobiyografim kendi basina haksizliga direnistir. This struggle for total liberation will last until I die. Topyekun kurtulus icin bu mucadele olene kadar surecek.

Prosecuter Arif Karabas who was best gambling friend of my uncle Yunus Iskender tried to send me to jail by pursuing his fake insult complaint for years. Yunus Iskender
amcamin candan kumar arkadasi savci Arif Karabas yillarca surdurdugu sahte hakaret davasiyla beni hapse atmaya ugrasti. When I was in the high school I wrote “you protect communists” in my defense paper against charging high school principle Resat Sirin as protected freedom of expression but still got me expelled from the high school outside the province and also 6 months prison sentence Lisedeyken Müdür Resat Sirin’e karsi yazdigim disiplin savunmasinda “komunistleri tutuyorsun” dedigim icin yasal olarak korunan ifade ozgurlugu icinde olmasina ragmen hakaretten liseden vilayet disina atildim ve de 6 ay hapis cezasi aldim. All military regime blacklisted me on this and even all press news distorted this like l assaulted the principle in order to justify this oppression. Butun askeri yonetim beni bunun uzerine mimledi ve hatta tum basin haberleri bu zulmu hakli gosterebilmek icin bu gercegi benim Müdürü dovdugum seklinde carpittilar. My freedom of expression and universal defense rights are still denied! Ifade ozgurlugum ve evrensel savunma hakkim bugune kadar israrla inkar edildi. This time same attack on my defense right and freedom of expression came from Arif Karabas which was fortunately dismissed as I wrote all quotes from a law book on defense right. Bu kez savunma hakkima ve ifade ozgurlugume ayni saldiri savci Arif karabas’tan geldi. The reason why I write these here in my autobiography is the same freedom of expression, right of defense and critique. Burda bunlari otobiyografimde yazmamin nedeni yine ayni ifade ozgurlugu, savunma ve elestiri hakkidir.

So I was surrounded in another front thanks to my uncle Yunus. Yunus amcam sayesinde bir baska cephede daha kusatilmistim. My father and my uncle Yunus were
very happy with this persecution.
Babam ve Yunus amcam bu baskidan cok mutluydu. When my uncle Yunus saw me fighting injustice in the village he used to ridicule me to his friends and to my face as saying loudly “Recai is doing his doctorate here”. Yunus amcam koyde beni hak arama mucadelesi yaparken gordugu zaman arkadaslarina beni alaya alarak yuksek sesle “Recai burda doktorasini yapiyor” diyerek bana da laf atardi. When l wanted to ask solidarity in Kuyumcullu each time my uncle Yunus would always avoid speaking with me claiming he is too busy doing his business and run to his gambling hole in Karasu. Yunus amcama dayanisma icin yanasip konusmak istedigim her seferinde cok isi oldugunu ileri surer ve Karasu’ya kumarhanesine kosardi. When l catch him in his illegal gambling operation
hole in Karasu uncle Yunus starts bragging about his close relationships with the officials like Karasu prosecutor Arif Karabas and State Minister Eyup Asik and big mafia boss Alaattin
Cakici
. Karasu’da Yunus amcami kacak kumarhanesinde yakaladigim zaman bana Karasu Savcisi Arif Karabas, Devlet Bakani Eyup Asik ve buyuk mafya patronu Alaattin Cakici ile olan yakin
iliskilerini anlatip hava atardi. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alaattin_Çakıcı. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eyüp_Aşık When l pressed uncle Yunus for solidarity for my fight against injustice from
Gladio Undersecretary Tugay Ozceri my uncle Yunus would yell at me that his contact State Minister Eyup Asik insists this is totally mission impossible and l am insane because l want something impossible
. Yunus amcami dayanisma icin sikistirinca bana adami Devlet Bakani Eyup Asik’in benim isimin kesinlikle imkansiz oldugunda israr ettigini ve benim imkansiz olan bir seyi istedigim icin deli oldugumu bagirarak soylerdi. He brainwashed other
family members in the same line.
Oteki aile fertlerinin de ayni cizgide beynini yikadi. My uncle Yunus Iskender, uncle Suleyman Iskender, uncle Fahri Iskender and
his sons Nafi and Fati and my father and my grandfather Osman Cavus all repeated singing this same impossible song and yelling at me that l must be insane like my mother and must be locked up like my mother in Istanbul Bakirkoy Mental Hospital for insisting and bothering them on an impossible mission
. Yunus Iskender amcam, Suleyman Iskender amcam, Fahri Iskender amcam ve ogullari Nafi and Fatih, babam, ve Osman Cavus dedem hep birlikte ayni bu imkansiz sarkisini okuyorlar ve bana bu imkansiz iste israr edip onlari rahatsiz ettigim icin benim de annen gibi deli oldugumu ve benim de annem gibi Istanbuldaki Bakirkoy timarhanesine kapatilmam lazim geldigini bagiriyorlardi. Unfortunately their lifetime mission was all impossible crime to burn forest and operate illegal gambling hole and to do other crimes. Maalesef hayatlarinin misyonu tamamen imkansiz olan orman yakmak ve kacak kumarhane
isletmek ve benzeri suclardir. Do not forget their impossible crimes against my poor angel mother and my father using me as hitman on my brothers and my brother Sezai’s impossible
illegal loansharking and beating and oppressing his wife Mercan to death
. Zavalli melek anneme karsi isledikleri imkansiz suclari ve babamin beni kardeslerime karsi tetikci olarak
kullanmasi ve kardesim Sezai’nin imkansiz tefecilik isini ve karisi Mercani doverek eze eze oldurmesini de unutmayin. It is absolutely okey for them to spend all their lives for impossible crimes but it is insane and reason to be locked up in the asylum to speak against injustice from Gladio Ozceri! Onlar icin butun hayatlarini imkansiz suclar icin harcamalari tamamen akillicadir ama benim Gladyo Ozceri’nin kanunsuzluguna karsi konusmam tamamen delilik ve timarhaneye kapatma sebebiydi. My uncle Suleyman threatened me in the village square many times that if I do not quit complaining about injustice he will get me locked up like my mother! Suleyman amcam koy meydaninda bircok kez beni tehdit ederek eger sikayetlerimden vazgecmezsem annem gibi beni timarhaneye kapattiracaklarini soylerdi. Uncle Fahri Iskender’s son Nafi iskender also called me insane many times and threatened me in the village square for beating me up if I do not quit complaining about injustice. Fahri amcamin oglu Nafi Iskender bana bircok kez deli dedi ve koy carsisinda beni tehdit etti ve eger haksizliga karsi sikayetlerimden vazgecmezsem beni dovecegini soyledi. I told him he better kill me than beating me up because I would definitely shoot him! Ben de kendisine beni dovecegine oldurmesinin daha iyi olacagini cunku benim onu mutlaka vurcagimi soyledim! Will Nafi and my uncle Suleyman deny these now? Nafi ve Suleyman amcam bunlari inkar mi ediyorlar simdi? They would never speak like this without consent from my father and grandfather Osman Cavus Babamin ve Osman Cavus dedemin onayi olmadan asla boyle konusamazlar.

My uncle Yunus was also big shot leading the solidarity association of Iskender clan and always excluding me from clan solidarity meetings, dinners and amusement events he organized when l needed most solidarity. Yunus amcam Iskenderliler dayanisma derneginin basini ceken buyuk adamdi ve hak arama mucadelemde en cok destege ihtiyacim oldugu anda beni duzenledigi dayanisma toplantilarindan, yemeklerinden ve eglencelerinden disliyordu. l used to hear strange succes of excluding me from this solidarity movement of my Iskender
clan when l was in need of solidarity in Kuyumcullu.
Ben Kuyumculludayken encok dayanismaya muhtac oldugum anda Iskenderliler dayanisma hareketinin beni acayip dislama basarisina sahit oluyordum. I guess lskender clan decided that l was totally insane and not worth even to see and hear a second! Sanirim Iskenderliler sulalesi hep birlikte benim
deliligime ve bir saniye bile beni gormeye ve dinlemeye degmeyecegine karar vermistiler! So my Iskender clan decided to exclude me from clan solidarity benefits based on their conviction that l am totally insane as asking something impossible against Gladio Ozceri. Bu sekilde Gladyo Ozceriye karsi imkansiz bir sey istedigim icin benim sulalem tamamen deli oldugum hukmune vererek sulale dayanismasinin meyvelerinden beni dislamaya karar verdi.

It is an always repeating ridiculous story. Bu her zaman tekrarlanan sacma bir hikayedir. My father denied us enjoying mother care and abusively alienated us from our mother. Babam bizi anne sevkat ve bakimindan mahrum etti ve kotu bir sekilde bizi annemize karsi yabanci haline getirdi. My father set an abusive example and guided our step mother Hayriye to abuse us too. Babam kendisi uvey annem Hayriye icin kotu bir ornek olusturdu ve onu bize karsi kotu yonlendirdi.

It was like my father making me a political target for the left then leaving me all alone defenseless against the state and his exclusion of me from the opportunity of revoking my political prison conviction by appealing to the new nationalist front government when l was in high school. Bu, babamin ben lisedeyken beni kiskirtip sola hedef gosterdikten sonra hukumetin karsisinda beni tamamen yalniz birakmasi ve benim aldigim siyasi hapis kararini yeni gelen Milliyetci Cephe Hukumeti’ne basvurup duzelttirme firsatindan beni mahrum etmesi gibidir.

This is like my father and step mother excluded me and my siblings from my step mother’s lifetime knitting favors. Bu babamin ve uvey annemin beni ve kardeslerimi uvey annemin hayati boyunca yaptigi orgulerden mahrum etmesi gibidir. This is like my grandfather Osman Cavus tortured me with starvation in my school while he built
one 3-story building and another 5-story building and a multi-level religious school!
Bu, Osman Cavus dedemin ben okuldayken bana aclik iskencesi yaparken birisi uc katli, otekisi
bes katli apartman ve cok katli din okulu yaptirmasi gibidir. My grandfather Osman Cavus donated religion school to cover up his complicity in my father’s crimes against my mother and us. Osman Cavus dedem babamin anneme ve bize karsi isledigi suclardaki suc ortakligini ortbas edip halkin ve tanrinin gozunu boyamak icin din okulu bagisladi.

This is like when my father and brother Sezgin destroyed my tent in the beach struggle while they built 2-story luxury house, 59-head capacity factory farm and its addendum
building, and bought new farm tractor and luxury brand new Opel car.
Bu, Babamla kardesim Sezgin’in plaj mucadelesinde ucbes odun parcasini benden almak icin cadirimi
yikarken kendilerine iki katli luks ev, 50 baslik modern ahir ve ekli bina yaptirip, yeni traktor, sifir kilometre luks Opel araba almalari gibidir. Brother Sezgin came to see me in my tent at the beach just after the beach struggle against the state railcar industries supported me morally against threats of a mobile produce vendor who was married with Nafi’s sister. Kardesim Sezgin Adapazari Vagon Sanayinin koyun plajina el koymasina karsi verdigimizi plaj mucadelesinden hemen sonra beni plajdaki cadirimda ziyaret edip Nafi’nin kizlardesi Suna ile evli olan seyyar manavin bana karsi yaptigi tehditlere karsi bana moral vermisti. But in a few days my brother Sezgin showed his real face by showing up with my father to destroy my tent. Fakat birkac icinde kardesim Sezgin babamla gelerek cadirimi yiktinca gercek yuzunu gosterdi.

My brother Sezgin supported me to save my tipo brand car from my Turkish ex-wife Hurriyet Korkmaz Kocoglu but then he wanted to confiscate my car and turned his back to me as I sold my car for its safety. Kardesim Sezgin tipo marka arabami bosandigim eski esim hurriyet Yasar Korkmaz Kocoglu’ndan kurtarmak icin yardim etti ancak bu yardimin karsiliginda arabama elkoymak istedi ve arabamin guvenligi icin arabami satinca bana sirtini dondu. That means Sezgin would never help me if he knew he would not be able use my car for free! Bu da Sezgin’in eger arabamdan faydalanamayacagini bilseydi bana asla yardim etmeyecegini ispatlar. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tofaş This tipo car caused a lot of trouble with my ex wife hurriyet who turned our divorce into a war just to grab my car which was my only property while she took 3 apartments and one plot. Bu tipo arabam eski esim Hurriyet’ten benim basima cok dert getirdi ki Hürriyet sahip oldugu uc ev ve bir arsanin yaninda benim tek malim olan arabami kapabilmek icin bosanma davasini meydan savasina cevirdi. I wish I left it to Hürriyet though. Ama yine de keske arabami Hurriyet’e bagislasaydim. Because when I came to America my American ex wife Marilee Roberson accused me of stealing my own car from my ex Turkish wife in order to garb my money which I brought here from its sale in Turkey. Cunku eski Amerikan esim Marilee Roberson arabami Turkiye’de satip buraya getirdigim parama el koyabilmek icin beni kendi arabami eski Turk esimden calmakla sucladi. In the meantime for 10 years, my brother Sezgin always harassed me for the same money and indentured me for this car money because I would not be able save my car from my ex wife without his help! Ayni zamanda 10 yil boyunca kardesim Sezgin bana yardim etmeseydi arabami eski esimden kurtaramayacagimi iddia edip arabanin parasini kendisine borclu oldugumu soyleyip bana borc cikardi ve beni sikistirdi.

This is like Sezai refused to give even a cent to my struggle against Gladio undersecretary Ozceri while he got the money to burn and clear Saricaali forests, to buy a new apartment house in Karasu, to buy a brand new luxury Opel car to our brothers Tural and Sezgin , to chase another woman everyday, and to share between brothers secretly all the lands which they forcefully grabbed from my father and maternal uncle Hasan. Bu, Sezai’nin Gladyo Ozceriye
karsi mucadele etmek icin bir lirayi bana cok gorurken, Saricaali ormanlarini yakip acmaya, Karasu’da yeni daire almaya, Turala luks Opel araba almaya ve hergun baska bir kadinin pesinden kosmaya yetecek para bulmasi ve bu arada hem annemden hem de babamdan zorla yer alip butun yerleri aralarinda gizlice paylastirmasi gibidir.

Nothing changed. Hicbirsey degismedi. Today Sezai got same fake facebook solidarity group threw me out. . Bugun Sezai ayni sahte Facebook Kuyumcullu
dayanisma grubundan beni attiriyor. Here: Burda:

Another strange situation is that some facebook friends constantly click reject to my feacebook event invitation to read my blacklisted hitman autobiography! Birbaska acayip durum da Facebook’taki bazi arkadaslarin Mimli tetikci otobiyografimi okumak icin Facebook’ta yaptigim davetlere hep red cevabi vermeleridir! So they reject my life but still stay
as my friends on Facebook!
Yani benim hayatimi reddediyorlarlar ama yine de Facebook’ta arkadasim olarak kaliyorlar. I think if you do not like somebody’s real life you do not like that person either. Eger birisinin gercek hayatini sevmiyorsaniz onu sevmiyorsunuz demektir. My question to those fake friends is If you do not like my life
and me why are you still my Facebook friend?
Bu kisilere benim sorum sudur eger benim hayatimi ve beni sevmiyorsaniz niye hala benim Facebook arkadasimsiniz? I wonder why do not they unfriend me on Facebook with a single click as I cannot change my real life? Ben gercek hayatimi degistiremeyecegime gore neden onlar beni arkadas listesinden tek bir tiklama ile cikartmiyorlar acaba?

As you probably know l was very good in Kuyumcullu village elementary school and Kocaali middle school so I was accepted as Free Boarding Student in the Istanbul Haydarpasa High School. Belki biliyorsunuz Kuyumcullu Ilkokulu’nda ve Kocaali Ortaokulu’nda cok iyi oldugum icin Istanbul Haydarpasa Lisesi’ne Parasiz Yatili ogrenci olarak kabul edildim. But my father transferred me from Istanbul to Adapazari without any conversation with me as leftist groups became active in the school in Istanbul. Solcu gruplar Istanbul’daki okulda etkin hale gelince babam sorgusuz sualsiz beni Adapazari’na transfer etti. So my father killed my totally free boarding school chance in the best school. Boylece babam eniyi okulda tamamen parasiz yatili okuma sansimi oldurdu. Haydarpasa High School was leader in education with the deepest root in history and its magnificent building. Haydarpasa Lisesi, tarihteki derin koku ve muhtesem binasi ile egitimde liderdi. Here: Burda:
http://www.hplmezunlari.org.tr/AltSayfa.aspx?ID=81 Haydarpasa High School free boarding was still leader many years after me. Haydarpasa Lisesi parasiz
yatili ben ayrildiktan sonraki yillarda hala liderdi. Here: Burda:
http://www.hplmezunlari.org.tr/AltSayfa.aspx?ID=65 My father was so scared of the ideas siding with the oppressed in the school. Babam, okulda ezilenlerden yana cikan fikirlerden cok korkuyordu. My father’s false excuse was that he protected me from troubles in the school. Babamin sahte bahanesi, beni okuldaki sorunlardan korumakti. But school stayed as leader in education so I lost my best free boarding and best college scholarship opportunity due to my father’s fascist mindset. Fakat okul egitimde lider olarak kalmaya devam etti ve boylece ben hem eniyi lisede parasiz yatili hem de burslu universite okuma imkanimi babamin fasist kafasi yuzunden kaybettim. Moreover my father’s proven cheapness, fascist brainwash and provocation against the left made me a target of left and right and state all my life. Ustelik babamin ispatlanmis cimriligi ve fasist beyin yikamasi ve sola karsi kiskirtmasi beni hayatim boyunca solun, sagin ve devletin hedefi yapti. As my father’s abuse on my mother invited and encouraged abuse from his family and second wife his political provocation against left also invited and encouraged all kinds of abuses from every sides and state. Babamin anneme karsi kotu muamelesi nasil ailesinin ve ikinci esinin kotu muamelesini davet ve tesvik ettiyse, beni sola karsi kiskirtmasi da her taraftan ve devletten bana karsi kotu muameleyi davet ve tesvik etti. As my father separated us from our mother only for his lust to a second wife under the guise of caring for us, he killed my best education opportunities only for his fascist mindset under the guise of caring for my wellness. Babam bize bakmak icin diyerek aslinda ikinci es icin duydugu sehvet yuzunden bizi annemizden ayirdigi gibi, fasist kafasi nedeniyle sanki beni koruyormus gibi yaparak benim en iyi okuma imkanlarimi tek kalemde yok etti. My father never cared anything about me or our well being at all because he was not able to care for us as he was raised to act like this like a robot. Babam benim veya bizim iyiligimizi hicbir zaman dusunmedi cunku boyle yetistigi icin robot gibi zaten bizim iyiligimizi dusunmesi mumkun degildir. This is how my father was raised and he never knew how to question anything about it! Babam boyle yetismisti ve bu konuyu sorgulamayi asla ogrenmemisti. All my family suffers from this epidemic like most of mankind. Insanligin buyuk cogunlugu gibi benim ailemin hepsi bu salgin hastaliktan muzdariptir.

Even though my father never prayed in those days he ordered me to pray five times a day in the mosque of the school. Babam veya uvey annem kendileri o zaman hic mamaz kilmadiklari halde babam bana okulun mescidinde bes vakit namaz kilma emri verdi. My father made me the only regular fulltime prayer in the Haydarpasa boarding school. Babam beni Haydarpasa yatili lisesinde bes vakit surekli namaz kilan tek ogrenci yapti. My father never gave me money or took me to see important sights while I was at school in Istanbul or in Adapazari. Babam ben Istanbul’da veya Adapazari’nda okurken onemli yerleri gormek icin asla bana para vermedi veya kendi alip gezdirmedi.

My father was a dictator and l had no choice. Babam bir diktatordu ve benim baska hicbir secenegim yoktu. I grabbed my father as one grabs the snake when one falls in the sea! Denize dusenin yilana sarilmasi gibi ben de babama sarildim.
My father also ordered me to stay away from any leftist. Babam herturlu solcudan da uzak durmami emretti. He also ordered me not to go to Kadikoy neighbourhood. Kadikoy semtine gitmemem icin de emir verdi. He said Kadikoy is bad because it is leftist. Kadikoy semtinin solcu oldugu icin kotu oldugunu soyledi. He ordered me to go to Uskudar neighborhood. Uskudar semtine gitmemi emretti. He said Uskudar is good because it is rightist.Uskudar semtinin sagci oldugu icin iyi oldugunu soyledi. So he ordered me to be fascist against leftists like uncle Ziya Iskender and cousin Yusuf Erturk. Ziya Amca ve hala oglu Yusuf Erturk gibi solculara karsi fasist olmami emretti. My father killed my future for his own agenda. Babam kendi gizli plani icin beni yakti.

As my father killed my best free boarding opportunity in Haydarpasa he did not have anything for me In Adapazari except leftist Yusuf Erturk’s mother my paternal half aunt Fadime right by the school. Haydarpasa’da en iyi yatili okul imkanimi yok eden babamin Adapazari’nda okulun tam yanibasinda oturan solcu Yusuf Erturk’un annesi olan Fadime halamdan baska bana verecek bir seyi yoktu. However, my father did not like the fact that my aunt Fadime’s leftist son Yusuf Erturk getting friendly with me in the house. Ancak babam Fadime halamin solcu oglu Yusuf’un evde benimle arkadaslik baslatmasindan memnun kalmadi. My father killed my best opportunity in Haydarpasa just to prevent me getting friendly with the leftists and then he did exactly same to kill my better school opportunity in Adapazari as he realized my cousin Yusuf Erturk is also leftist. Babam Haydarpasadaki en iyi firsatimi sadece solcularla bir arada olmami onlemek icin yoketti ve sonra Adapazari’nda hala oglu Yusuf Erturk’un solcu oldugunu anladigi zaman tipatip ayni seyi yaparak yine daha iyi okuma firsatimi yok etti.

My father immediately took me out of this house. Babam beni derhal bu evden cikardi. He also beat my aunt Fadime’s son Yusuf Erturk in front of me while he was walking to their field in front of our house just because of his leftist ideas. Gozlerimin onunde halamin oglu Yusuf Ertürk’u bizim evin onunde yoldan bahcelerine giderken sadece sol fikirlerinden dolayi dovdu. He grabbed my aunt Fadime’s son Yusuf Erturk as he came out of his house walking to their field in the village and began cursing and hitting him like interrogation. Fadime Halamin oglu Yusuf Ertürk’u evlerinden cikip bahcelerine giderken yakaladi ve sanki sorgulama yapiyormus gibi sovup dovdu. Yusuf Erturk was member of Socialist Workers Party of Turkey and worked there all his life and became a member in its Central Executive Board. Yusuf Erturk Turkiye Sosyalist Isci Partisi (TSIP) uyesi idi ve partide hayati boyunca calismisti ve Merkez Yonetim Kurulunda gorev almisti. Here: Burda: http://halkgazetesi.net/?sf=b1&islem=detay&kayitbag=5w1rqe3xkv48t18g2b66q3csm91nh6acs1s33jpc3g9j57px8

My father loves to set example for people. Babam insanlar icin ornek olmayi sever. My father became example to my step mother to abuse us by abusing my real mother. Babam ozannemi ezerek bizi ezmesi icin uvey anneme ornek oldu. My father was training me and setting a fasist hitman example for me by hitting leftist cousin Yusuf Erturk . Babam beni fasist tetikci yetistirmek icin beni boyle egitiyor ve hala oglu solcu Yusuf Erturk’e saldirarak bana fasist bir ornek oluyordu.

I was never hurt by any leftist while living in Haydarpasa high school or in my cousin leftist Yusuf Erturk’s house. Haydarpasa Lisesinde veya hala oglu solcu Yusuf Erturk’lerin evinde yasarken herhangi bir solcudan asla kotu bir muamele gormedim. However my father himself extracted me from my place and killed my opportunity and brainwashed me that leftists caused my losses! Ancak babam beni yerimden koparip aldi ve firsatimi yoketti ve kayiplarima solcularin neden oldugunu anlatip solculara karsi beynimi yikayip beni kiskirtti. My father falsely charged leftists for his own crime and provoked me against leftists. Babam kendi sucunu solcularin ustune atti ve beni solculara karsi kiskirtti.

Likewise, my father abused my mother from the beginning to the extent to cause her mental crises and then falsely charged her for uncaring for us and provoked me against my own innocent mother. Ayni sekilde, babam anneme eziyet ederek onu ruh hastasi yapti ve sonra onu bize bakmamakla sucladi ve ozanneme karsi beni kiskirtti. When I asked for my mother he put his own crime on my innocent mother and brainwashed me that she is insane! Ozannemi sordugum zaman kendi sucunu masum annemin ustune atti ve onun deli oldugu seklinde beynimi yikadi. But actually my mother was so innocent that she never ever hurt anybody especially my horrible step mother Hayriye. Fakat gercekten ozannem Huriye o kadar masumdu ki hickimsenin ve ozellikle korkunc uvey annem Hayriye’nin canini hic yakmadi. Violence, abuse and neglect always came from my father, his family and my step mother. Siddet, kotu muamele ve ihmal daima babamdan, ailesinden ve uvey annemden geldi. But my father always provoked me against my mother like leftists. Fakat babam daima beni solculara karsi yaptigi gibi anneme karsi kiskirtti. Once l was blacklisted by the 12 September coup d’état regime because of my father’s reckless brainwashing and provocation then he always put his crime on me and spread false news that I am insane for fighting the injustice. Babamin beyin yikamasi ve kiskirtmasi sonucunda benim 12 Eylul Ihtilal rejimi tarafindan mimlenmemden sonra da kendi sucunu benim uzerimde atti ve haksizliga karsi savastigim icin deli oldugumu yaydi.

My father was a brutal fascist himself as he displayed it to me all my life and discarded me after he used me as Gladio does to its hitmen all the time. Babam butun hayatim boyunca bana sergiledigi gibi kendisi vahsi bir fasist idi ve Gladyonun kullandigi kendi tetikcilerine herzaman yaptigi gibi beni kullandiktan sonra atti. He also yelled at me to stay
away from those leftists like aunt Fadime’s son Yusuf Ertürk
. Bana da hala oglu Yusuf Ertürk gibi solculardan uzak durmam icin bagirdi.

He forced me to live with aunt Binnaz Ak in the other end of the city by walking more than two hours everyday. Hergun enaz iki saat yuruyerek sehrin oteki ucunda oturan halam Binnaz Ak’in yaninda kalmaya beni mecbur etti. He burned me for his monstrous fascist agenda. Canavarca gizli fasist plani icin beni yakti. He ordered me to visit racist fasist Turkes supporters like himself. Kendisi gibi irkci fasist Turkescileri ziyaret etmemi emretti.

My father is still same racist fascist Turkes MHP party member. Babam hala ayni irkci fasist Turkesci MHP uyesidir. When l was in Turkey my fascist father had huge Alpaslan Turkes portait in a most visible corner in his house. Ben Turkiye’de iken fasist babam evinin en gorunur kosesinde Alpaslan Turkesin cok buyuk bir portresini sergiliyordu.

But again he transferred me to Karasu as leftist groups gained control in the school in Adapazari too. Ancak sol gruplar Adapazari’ndaki okulda da kontrolu ele alinca babam beni Karasu’ya transfer etti. Again I joined some gray Wolfe training to attack leftist to follow my father’s foot steps but was never hurt by any leftist! Yine babamin emrini dinleyip izinden gidip solculara saldirmak icin ulkuculerin egitimine katildim ama asla solcular tarafindan ezilmedim. As comrades of my cousin Yusuf Erturk became dormitory director and got very close to me in the dormitory which maddened father again. Hala oglu Yusuf Erturk’un yoldaslari kaldigim yurtta idareci olup bana yaklasinca babam yine delirdi. Therefore he hit last nail to my coffin. Boylece tabutuma son civiyi de cakti. He smashed my university chance from 100 percent in best school of Turkey to zero percent in Karasu. Boylece universiteyi kazanma sansimi Turkiyenin en iyi okulu
Haydarpasada yuzde yuzde yuzken beni Karasu’ya alarak yuzde sifira dusurdu. He burned me and brainwashed me to be his fascist hitman. Babam beni yakti ve fasist tetikci
olmam icin beynimi yikadi. He pretended he cared for my education and future. Egitimime ve gelecegime onem veriyormus gibi yalandan rol yapti. He constantly accused leftists for killing my education chance. Egitimim sansimi oldurme sucunu surekli
solcularin ustune atti. He put his own crime on the left. Kendi sucunu solun ustune yikti.

In fact, Gladio established National Action Party (MHP) and gray wolves to suppress democratic
demands of people with death squads and to make military coup d’état. Gerçekte Gladyo halkin Demokratik taleplerini olum mangalariyla bastirmak ve askeri ihtilal yapmak icin Miliyetci Hareket Partisi’ni (MHP) ve ulku ocaklarini kurmustu

Then my father took me to the racist fascist MHP Karasu chairman Cevat Karabulut and ordered me to visit his office everyday. Babam beni MHP Karasu ilce baskani Cevat Karabulut’un burosuna goturdu ve hergun ziyaret edip birlikte oturmami emretti. Chairman Karabulut’s accounting office was in the most visible corner with window in all sides in the street level in the Main Street in Karasu. Baskan Karabulut’un muhasebe burosu Karasu’nun ana caddesinde giris katinda en gorunen baskosede her tarafi camla kapliydi. Karasu court and prosecutor’s office was right across the street. Karasu Mahkemesi ve Savci’nin burosu hemen karsidaydi. My father made me an easy target for the leftist prosecutor of the leftist government! Babam beni solcu hukumetin solcu savcisi icin kolay bir hedef yapti. My father and chairman ordered me to refrain from visiting my leftist relative Enver Salman in the same building. Babam ve fasist baskan
ayni binada calisan sol fikirli Enistem Enver Salman’i ziyaret etmemi yasakladilar. Enver Salman was married with daughter of my mother’s sister Fadime living in Karasu. Enistem Enver Salman Karasu’da yasayan Fadime teyzemin kiziyla evliydi. Enver Salman was director of Karasu Deed Titles Office. Enver Eniste Karasu Tapu Muduru’ydu. Enver Salman was active in political life in Karasu. enver Salman Karasu’nun
siyasi hayatinda aktif birisidir. Here: Burda:

http://www.karasununsesi.com/haber/2964/chp-heyeti-karasuda-bulustu.html

My father and fasist chairman Cevat Karabulut constantly brainwashed me against my super friendly relative Enver Salman. Babam ve baskan bana karsi cok candan
davranan Enver Salman enisteme karsi surekli benim beynimi yikadilar. My father burned me just like this. Babam beni iste boyle yakti. My father and fascist MHP chairman Cevat Karabulut were very close. Fasist MHP Baskani Cevat Karabulut ve babam birbirleriyle cok yakindilar. They both provoked me against the leftist bureaucrats , leftist high school principal and leftist government. Birlikte beni solcu burokratlara, solcu lise mudurune ve solcu hukumete karsi kiskirttilar. They intensely brainwashed me with lies that the left burned my education chance since Istanbul. Istanbuldan beri egitim sansimi solun yaktigi yalanlariyla surekli beynimi yikadilar. As if it was the left not my own father Resat Iskender who took me away from my best schools in Istanbul and
in Adapazari
. Sanki Istanbul ve Adapazari’ndaki en iyi okullardan beni alan benim kendi babam Resat Iskender degildi de soldu. They ordered me to criticize the leftist government openly in the school. Okulda hukumeti aciktan elestirmemi emrettiler. They burned me by provocation with lies. Yalanlarla kiskirtarak beni yaktilar. My father’s provocation skill was extraordinary because he got a lot of experience from provoking me against my mother. Babamin kiskirtma kabiliyeti olaganustuydu cunku beni anneme karsi kiskirtmaktan dolayi cok tecrube sahibi olmustu.

I went to schools and worked away from home almost all my life but my father vever came to take me out for sight-seeing or enjoying meal together with a relaxing conversation. Hemen hemen butun hayatim boyunca evden uzakta gurbette okula veya ise gittim fakat babam bir kere gelip beni alip gezilecek guzel bir yere veya guzel bir sohbetle bir yemek yemege goturmedi. My father cursed and beat me up when I said I am hungry as our bus stopped for rest on the way to Ankara to register me to my college in front of cousin Muhsin Iskender. Babam Ankara ‘ya Siyasal’a kaydimi yaptirmaya giderken otobus yolda mola icin durunca karnim ac dedigim icin Muhsin Iskender’in yaninda bana sovdu ve beni dovdu.

As we finished my registration my father took me to Ulus Shooping Center right by Anafartalar Shopping Center and in front of Ankara Produce Mall and did his trick on me there. Siyasal’a kayit islerini bitirince babam beni Ankara Sebze Halinin karsisinda ve AnafartalarCarsisinin yaninda olan Ulus Carsisi’na goturdu ve bana numarasini orda yapti. He spoke to me like he would get me a pair of pants and a jacket, etc and actually tried them on me to wear in the college but after he paid he took them with him and said he bought them for my brother Sezai who was about to drop out from second year in high school. Babam bana Siyasal’da okumak icin bir pantolon, ceket vesaire alacakmis gibi konustu ve bunlari bilfiil ustumde prova yapti fakat parayi odeyip gitme zamani gelince bu esyalari kendisi aldi ve bunlari liseyi ikinci siniftan terk eden kardesim Sezai Iskender icin aldigini soyledi. My father ordered me to get a night job in a small hotel and buy cheap pants and sweaters for myself and come back to village every weekend to get spending money! Babam bana kucuk bir otelde gece isi bulmami ve kendime ucuz pantolon ve kazak alarak okumami ve her hafta sonu harclik icin koye gelmemi emretti. My college is most elite college in its field in Turkey, not a community college where you can work full time while you study and spend your free time travelling to village by bus every weekend! Siyasal Bilgiler Fakultesi kendi alaninda en seckin okuldur ve tam gun gece isinde calisip tek bos zaman olarak kalan hafta sonlarini da koye otobusle gidip harcayabilecegin bir meslek okulu degildir. The reality imposed on me by my father was so painful that l always developed a false reality to protect my sanity. Babamin bana dayattigi gerceklik o kadar aciydi ki butun hayatim boyunca ruh sagligimi koruya bilmem icin sahte bir gerceklik gelistirdim. When my cousin Hizir Osman Iskender pressed me to confront my father and grandfather on my starvation l totally denied the reality out of fear that such confrontation will get me into worse troubles! Amca oglu Hizir Osman Iskender babam ve dedeme karsi acligim konusunda acikca tepki gostermem icin beni sikistirinca boyle bir cephelesmenin beni cok daha kotu dertlere sokacagindan korktugum icin gercegi tamamen inkar ederek yasadim. Out of my unbearable fear I instinctively helped my father impose his control on my mind to avoid confrontation let alone oppose him. Dayanilmaz korkum nedeniyle babamla karsi karsiya gelmemek icin icgudusel olarak babamin aklim uzerinde kontrol kurmasina karsi cikmak bir yana aksine yardimci oldum. My weakness against my father’s manipulation forced me to suicidal confrontation with left. Babamin manipulasyonuna karsi bu zayifligim beni bir intihara benzer sekilde solla karsi karsiya getirdi. I myself suffered alone directly and individually my father’ destructive power killing my best opportunities in Haydarpasa and Adapazari but none of my siblings lived such a tragedy. Babamin Haydarpasa’da ve Adapazari’nda en iyi firsatlari mahveden gucunu ben sadece kendim dogrudan ve bireysel olarak yasadim fakat kardeslerimin hicbirisi boyle bir trajedi yasamadi. I was the chosen hitman on my sister and her husband and her girl friend! Kizkardesime,kocasina ve kiz arkadasina karsi tetikci olarak secilen de bendim! The more blow you receive the more slave you become! Ne kadar darbe alirsan o kadar kole olursun! I received most the traumas and had all reason to fear for more! Travmanin cogunu yasadim ve daha cok travmadan korumak icin herturlu nedenim vardi. Mind control worked effectively not only on me but on all humanity! Akil kontrolu sadece benim ustumde degil tum insanlik ustunde etkili oldu. Here: Burda: http://www.bibliotecapleyades.net/sociopolitica/esp_sociopol_mindcon02.htm

My father always pretended he rescued me from the left in Istanbul and Adapazari but the left did not even tell me a bad word. Babam bana tek bir laf etmeyen soldan beni
Istanbul ve Adapazari’nda kurtarmis gibi yalandan rol yapti. My father actually proved to me how he could kill my best school opportunities in istanbul and Adapazari for his own
fascist agenda
. Babam gercekte kendi gizli fasist plani icin benim Istanbul ve Adapazari’nda en iyi okul imkanlarimi nasil yok edebilecegini bana ispatladi.

My father and Fascist Chairman Cevat Karabulut brainwashed me accusing the left for everything. Babam ve dostu fasist baskan Cevat Karabulut her seyden solu suclayarak beynimi yikadilar. They put their own crimes on the left. Kendi suclarini sola
yuklediler. While Chairman Cevat Karabulut was putting me on the target he always hid his son Cevdet Karabulut. Fasist baskan Cevat Karabulut beni hedef yaparken oglu Cevdet Karabulut’u hep sakliyordu. His invisible son Cevdet Karabulut is now chairman in
Karasu like his father. Onun gorunmeyen oglu Cevdet Karabulut babasi gibi Karasu’da baskan simdi. Here: Burda: http://www.karasununsesi.com/haber/207/cevdet-kenan-karabulut-babasini-kaybetti.html

In the meantime my brother Sezai got me removed and attacked me in the Kuyumcullu group on Facebook. Ayni zamanda kardesim Sezai Facebooktaki Kuyumcullu
gurubundan beni attirdiktan sonra herturlu saldiriyi yapiyor. Brother Sezai attacks freedom of expression!. Kardesim Sezai ifade ozgurlugune saldiriyor! Here: Burda: http://t.co/z7VfP6lvqW Sezai is imitating typical fascist leaders like
Tayyip Erdogan and Barak Obama in suppressing dissent.
Sezai, karsitlarini bastirmakta Tayyip Erdoan ve Barak Obama gibi tipik fasist liderleri aynen taklit ediyor.
Instead of answering to facts in my writing Sezai labeling me mentally sick and lier and false charger and threatens people with both emotions and violence who liked my writing. Sezai yazdigim gerceklere cevap vermek yerine beni ruh hastasi, yalanci ve iftiraci olmakla sucluyor ve yazimi begenenleri hem duygusal acidan hem de siddetle tehdit ediyor. Brother Sezai follows my fascist father and grandfather as his idol. Kardesim Sezai fasist babami ve dedemi kendi idolu olarak takip ediyor. Let’s look at what his idols did actually. Haydi onun idollerinin gercekten ne yaptigina bakalim.

I did act in high school exactly as my father and fascist chairman Karabulut ordered me.Babamin ve fasist Baskan Karabulut’un bana emrettiklerini okulda aynen yaptim. In response, pro-government leftist Principle Resat Sirin ordered me to write my opinions in a disciplinary self-defense paper. Buna karsilik, hukumet yandasi solcu müdür Resat Sirin goruslerimi disiplin savunma kagidina yazmami emretti. I wrote “you protect communists and persecute nationalists”. “Komunistleri koruyorsun milliyetcileri eziyorsun” diye yazdim. That was exactly what my fascist father and MHP chairman ordered me. Bu bana fasist babamin ve MHP baskaninin aynen soyledigi emirdi. Actually my father and Karabulut liked my writing and said so in the parents meeting! Babam ve Karabulut yazimi begendiler ve veli toplantisindan bunu soylediler. Because. It was exactly what they told me! Cunku bu bana soylediklerinin aynisiydi. If my father really wanted to save me from any trouble he should not use me a hitman on my sister and should not kill my best school opportunities in Haydarpasa and Adapazari and should not bring me Karasu and give me to Karabulut’s hands and set me against the leftists as they were the government. Eger babam gercekten beni herturlu dertten kurtarmak isteseydi beni kizkardesime karsi tetikci olarak kullanmamasi, benim Haydarpasa’daki ve Adapazaridaki mukemmel okul imkanlarimi mahvetmemesi ve Karasuya getirip Karabulut’un eline beni verip hukumet olan solculara karsi asla kiskirtmamasi gerekirdi.

Since my father used me as a hitman against my sister he cannot argue that he killed my best school opportunities because he wanted to protect me from troubles at all. Babam beni ablama karsi tetikci olarak kullandigi icin beni dertlerden korumak istedigi icin benim en iyi okul imkanlarimi yok ettigini iddia edemez. My father’s use of me as hitman proves he never cares about me! Babamin beni tetikci olarak kullanmis olmasi bana asla hic onem vermedigini ispatlar. Murdering own sister and her husband and raping her girlfriend are enough to send any 15 year old child to hell, to prison and to meantal hospital especially while you are in the best high school Haydarpasa free boarding! Ozellikle en iyi lise olan Haydarpasa’da parasiz yatili okurken kendi kizkardesini ve kocasini katletmek ve kizkardesinin kiz arkadasina tecavuz etmek hangi cocuk olursa olsun cehenneme, hapse ve akil hastanesine yollamayi garanti eder. A father who is that much cruel, cannot say he pulled me from best schools as he cared for me! Bu kadar zalim olan bir babanin ben seni dusunerek seni en iyi okullardan aldim diyemez. My father got forgiveness money worth at least 10 tones of good hazelnuts by using me as hitman. Babam beni tetikci olarak kullanarak en az 10 ton findik parasina denk af parasi aldi. But my father always starved me in the schools, killed my best school opportunities and abandoned me in my struggles in the court cases or in my diplomatic career. Fakat babam okullarda daima beni ac birakti, en iyi okul. Imkanlarimi yok etti ve mahkemelerimde ve diplomatik kariyerimde verdigim mucadelelerde beni hep ama hep yalniz birakti. My father spent that hitman forgiveness fortune to burn forests and also excluded me from secret sharing of the land he cleared from forest! Babam bu 10 tonluk tetikci af servetini benim okumam icin defil orman yakmak icin harcadi ve ormandan actigi yerlerin gizli paylasimindan da beni disladi. So my father used me as his hitman and took his fortune from this and backstabbed me all my life! Yani babam beni tetikcisi olarak kullandi ve bundan servet kazandi ve butun hayatim boyunca beni arkadan vurdu. My father tried to use me as his hitman second time on my three real brothers to retake his lost land for my half brothers and to send me to jail which initiated my 3 marches and then immigration to America. Babam kaybettigi yerleri geri uvey kardeslerim icin geri alabilmek ve beni hapse yollayabilmek icin uc oz kardesime karsi beni tetikci olarak ikinci defa kullanmak istedi ve bu da uc yuruyus eylemi yapmama ve sonra da Amerika’ya goc etmeme neden oldu. As soon as I arrived in America my father started to call me and pressured me for money for my half brother Ozcan Iskender every month up until 2010 when I lost my bus then he never called again! Amerika’ya gelir gelmez babam beni aramaya basladi ve her ay beni arayip uvey kardesim Ozcan Iskender icin para yollamam icin 2010 yilinda otobusumu kaybedene kadar beni sikistirdi ve otobus gidince asla arayip sormadi!

My father should not beat aunt Fadime’s leftist son Yusuf Ertürk in front of me. Fadime halamin oglu solcu Yusuf Erturk’u onumde dovmemesi gerekirdi. He
should not provoke me by asking me “can you beat leftist uncle Ziya in a political debate”.
“Solcu Ziya amcani siyasi tartismada yenebilir misin” diye sorularla beni kiskirtmamasi
gerekirdi. He should not take me to Fascist Chairman Cevat Karabulut to make me open target for the left. Fasist Cevat Karabulut’a beni goturup beni sola acik hedef yapmamasi gerekirdi. He should not take me from Turkey’s best free boarding school in Istanbul himself and accuse falsely the left for his responsibility for it. Istanbul’da Turkiyenin en iyi yatili okulundan beni getirmesinin sucunu yalandan yere solun ustune atmamasi gerekirdi. He should not badmouth and ban me to see leftist relative Director of
Titles Enver Salman
. Tapu Muduru Enver Salman enistemi kotuleyip konusmami yasaklamamasi gerekirdi. My father and chairman Karabulut should not keep me
as open target together in his accountant offce contantly in front of leftist government prosecutor
! Babam ve Baskan Karabulut’la birlikte beni solcu hukumetin savcisinin karsisindaki muhasebe burosunda surekli tutarak hedef gostermemeleri gerekirdi. My
father provoked and made me an open target to maddening degrees and then spread the gossip that they target me because l am insane like my poor mother.
Babam beni delirtecek kadar tahrik ettikten ve beni acik hedef haline getirdikten sonra etrafta benim
zavalli annem gibi deli oldugum icin boyle harcandigim dedikodusunu yayiyordu. He covered his crime with insane gossip. Sucunu deli dedikodusu ile kapatti.

As a result, the principle got me banned from any school in my Sakarya province because of my writing in defense statement. Sonuc olarak, Mudur yazdigim savunma
ifademden dolayi benim Sakarya Vilayetindeki okullarda okumami yasaklatti. I stated that principle is protecting communists as my defense and freedom of expression. Ifade ozgurlugu ve savunma ve elestiri hakki olarak mudurun komunistleri tuutugunu yazdim. In the same time, he got me sentenced for same statement to six months jail time in a single hearing. Ayni zamanda, ayni ifademden beni tek celsede alti aylik hapis cezasina mahkum ettirdi. Principle Resat Sirin, prosecutor and judge were all pro-leftist government. Müdür Resat Sirin, savci ve hakim sol hukumet yanlisiydi. My father and his buddy chairman Karabulut never helped me to fight back for justice. Babam ve dostu baskan Karabulut hak arama mucadelem icin bana hicbir sekilde yardimci olmadi.

My father and MHP chairman Karabulut who made me target by showing me to prosecutor everyday in his accountant office abandoned me in the courtroom all alone. Babam ve hergun burosunda beni tutup savciya hedef gosteren MHP Baskani Karabulut mahkeme gunu beni tamamen yalniz biraktilar. They never wanted to see an attorney. Hicbir sekilde bir avukatla gorusmek istemediler. They even blocked an appeals against this absurd decision. Bu akil almaz karara karsi temyiz yolunu bile engelllediler. They also never wanted another school for me. Hicbir sekilde benim
icin baska okul istemediler. They never raised a finger and asked anybody to help me. Parmaklarini bile kipirdatmadilar ve hickimseye yardim icin basvurmadilar.
My father and MHP chairman always used me but never showed any solidarity. Babam ve MHP baskani fasist Cevat Karabulut beni daima kullandilar ama hicbir zaman dayanisma
gostermediler. So my fascist father killed my all education chances since Istanbul. Babam Istanbul’dan beri tum egitim sansimi yok etti. My father together
with fascist chairman Karabulut intentionally threw me on fire in Karasu.
Babam fasist MHP baskani Cevat Karabulut ile birlikte Karasu’da kasten beni atese atti.

However, against their expectation, leftist Bulent Ecevit government collapsed and new Nationalist Front government allowed me to finish my school. Ancak onlarin beklentisinin tersine solcu hukumet yikildi ve yeni milliyetci cephe hukumeti okula donup bitirmeme musaade etti.

My father and chairman Karabulut tried to cover up their betrayal. Babam ve baskan Karabulut Ihanetlerini ortbas etmek icin calistilar They constantly lied that they worked to reverse my school ban to save me. Beni kurtarmak icin kendileri calisip okul yasagini kaldirmis gibi durmadan yalan soylediler. But in fact new government was called Nationalist Front and already reversed by itself all such decisions of the previous leftist government. Ancak gercekte yeni hukumet bir Milliyetci Cephe hukumeti idi ve onceki solcu hukumetin buna benzer butun kararlarini zaten kendiliginden iptal etmisti. If my
father and fascist MHP chairman Cevat Karabulut did not want to burn me together only thing they needed to do was to sent a copy of my court decision to the Nationalist Front Government which would reverse it automatically!
Eger babam ve fasist MHP baskani Cevat Karabulut birlikte beni yakmak istemeseydiler yapmalari gereken tek sey mahkeme kararinin bir kopyasini Milliyetci Cephe Hukumeti’ne yollamakti ki hukumet otomatikman bu karari bozacakti.

But instead they conspired to keep it secret from everyone to burn me
secretly.
Fakat bunun yerine beni gizlice yakmak icin bunu herkesten gizlediler. Like my court hearing my prison term decision stayed open secret for years. Benim durusmalarim gibi bu hapis karari da yillarca acik bir sir olarak kaldi. If they
did not conspire to burn me they would get that government to reverse that insane court decision as conspiracy and even fire that judge, prosecutor and the principle altogether if they
wished.
Eger beni yakmak icin gizlice anlasmamis olsalar o Milliyetci Cephe Hukumeti’ne bu manyakca karari kolayca tersine cevirttirirler ve hatta isteseler bunu yapan hakimi, savciyi ve müdürü hepsini birden isten attirabilirlerdi. Open goal of National Front Government was to stop communism which was seen as near danger. Milliyetci Cephe Hukumetinin acik hedefi yakin tehlike olarak gorulen komunizmi durdurmakti. Here: Burda:
http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milliyetçi_Cephe_Hükûmetleri CIA/Gladio established nationalist front governments to foment terrorism and civil war with fascist death squads who they
trained and establish a military coup d’état in 1980 to prevent communism in Turkey like all around the world.
CIA/Gladyo butun dunyada oldugu gibi Turkiye’de de komunizmi
engellemek icin yestistirdigi fasist olum mangalariyla terorizmi ve ic savasi kiskirtmak ve 1980 askeri darbesini getirebilmek icin Milliyetci Cephe hukumetlerini kurdu. Here: Burda: http://www.kontrgerilla.com/OHD_teknikbilgiler.asp

My father pulled me back from lstanbul and Adapazari by killing all my chances of education supposedly to prevent me from trouble. Babam sozde benim basim belaya girmesin diye butun egitim sansimi oldurerek Istanbul ve Adapazari’ndan beni okullardan
aldirip geri cekmisti. But he hid the super trouble in the Karasu Court from the Nationalist Front Government. Ama Karasu Mahkemesindeki puskullu belayi Milliyetci Cephe Hukumetinden gizledi. I never had any educational or political problems in Istanbul or in
Adapazari.
Istanbul ve Adapazari’nda herhangi bir ders veya siyasi hicbir sorunum yoktu. My father pulled me from these schools just because as a fascist himself he
did not want me to be exposed to leftist ideas presented in the schools.
Babam kendisi bir fasist oldugu icin beni okulda ortaya cikan sol dusuncelerden uzaklastirmak icin beni bu
Parasiz yatili okullardan aldi.

But with this action alone he made me an open target to all pro-government leftist people in Karasu! Fakat babamin bu hareketi bile tek basina beni
Karasu’daki hukumet yanlisi tum solcularin acik hedefi haline getirdi. My father made me open target as showing countless times by destroying me for years that he did not care about my education and all he wanted was to make me fascist! Babam benim egitimime hicbir onem vermedigini ve tek istedigi seyin beni fasist yapmak oldugunu yillarca beni perisan ederek zaten sayisiz kereler herkese gostererek beni acik hedef haline getirdi. My father or chairman Karabulut did not care to my loss or future as long as I stayed as their fascist hitman that they can use as they wished! Babam ve baskan Karabulut ben onlarin emrinde istedikleri zaman kullanabilecekleri bir fasist tetikci olarak kaldiktan sonra benim kayiplarima veya gelecegime hic bir onem vermediler.

The more leftists expelled and sentenced me the happier they felt! Solcular ne kadar beni atsalar ve mahkum etseler fasistler de o kadar mutlu oluyorlardi! When my future is shot they provoked me more to use me as a weapon against left. Gelecegim kapandigi zaman beni sola karsi silah olarak kullanmak icin daha cok tahrik ettiler. This is my father’s consistent strategy from home, Kocaali, Istanbul, in Adapazari, in Karasu and in the foreign ministry and in Kuyumcullu all the way in my life! Bu babamin evde, Kocaali’de, Istanbul’da, Adapazari’nda, Karasu’da, Siyasal’da, Disisleri’nde ve koyde hayatim boyunca uyguladigi stratejiydi. If I do not fall in trouble by myself my father forced me in trouble by himself so that he can always keep using me as his worthless hitman! Eger Ben kendiligimden basimi belaya sokmadiysam babam beni hep hicbir degeri olmayan bir tetikci olarak kullanmaya devam edebilmek icin benim basimi kendisi belaya soktu. If l am higher up he could not use me as his hitman but if I am helpless he could use me as hitman on anybody like my sister or brothers! Eger yukselirsem beni tetikci kole olarak kullanamaz ama caresizsem beni kardeslerim dahil herkese karsi tetikci kole olarak kullanabilir! This is my father’s fascist mindset! Bu babamin fasist zihniyetidir!

They all were thinking that l must be an ultra fascist student who cannot stand living in the same place with leftists or an ultra fascist student who has no future as sacrificed by my father like this as l never had any educational problem. Hepsi benim hicbir ders sorunum
olmadigini bildikleri icin solcularla bir arada yasayamayan asiri fasist bir ogrenci veya benim hayat gelecegimin babam tarafindan fasizme kurban edildigini dusunuyorlardi. My father reduced my status to an obvious fascist sacrifice which made me an open target and encouraged the left to attack me and brainwashed me by putting his crime on left and provoked me against the left! Babam benim durumumu belirgin fasist kurban durumuna indirgeyerek beni acik hedef yapmis ve solun bana saldirmasini tesvik etmistir ve beynimi yikayarak kendi sucunu sola atip beni kiskirtmistir.

There was another student named Huseyin Erol from Kuyumcullu in Haydarpasa High School as boarding student. Haydarpasa Lisesinde benimle beraber yatili
ogrenci olarak Kuyumcullu koyunden Huseyin Erol da vardi. Huseyin’s family had to pay his cost for boarding and registration etc contrary to my total free status. Benim tumden
parasiz statume karsilik Huseyin’in ailesi onun okuldaki kayit ve pansiyon ucretlerini odemek zorundaydilar. Huseyin’s father wanted to transfer Huseyin as his grades were not so great to avoid excessively high boarding fees. Huseyinin ders notlari dusuk gelince babasi bosuna cok asiri pansiyon parasi odememek icin onu Haydarpasadan almak istiyordu. Huseyin’s family always took care of him and he had relatives to visit every weekend. Huseyin’in ailesi ona cok iyi bakti ve Huseyin her hafta sonu akrabalarinin yaninda kaldi. One day I was with Huseyin in the local train in Kadikoy, Istanbul and we saw some political graffiti about leftist militant Ibrahim Kaypakkaya and he told me it is Kalpakkaya not Kaypakkaya. Birgun Istanbul Kadikoy’de Huseyinle beraber trenle giderken duvarda yazili “Ibrahim Kaypakkaya olmez” seklinde sol bir slogan gorduk ve Huseyin onun Kaypakkaya degil Kalpakkaya oldugunu soyledi. Kaypakkaya means slippery rock and Kalpakkaya means kalpak rock. Kaypakkaya kaygan ozelligi olan kaya ve Kalpakkaya da kalpak gibi olan kaya demektir. Huseyin did not care and insisted on his opinion. Huseyin aldiris etmedi ve gorusunde israr etti. But l was risking to get in trouble as Kadikoy was leftist neighborhood while trying to tell the truth to Huseyin . Fakat Kadikoy solcu bir semt oldugu icin ben Huseyin’e gercegi anlatmak isterken basimin belaya girmesini goze aliyordum. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/İbrahim_Kaypakkaya Fascist military regime murdered Kaypakkaya by torture in 1973 and banned to visit his graveyard even to his mother today! Fasist askeri rejim 1973’te Kaypakkaya’yi iskenceyle katletti ve bugun annesinin bile oglunun mezarini ziyaret etmesini yasakladi. This is fascist capitalist advanced democracy! Bu fasist kapitalist ileri demokrasidir! Where is NATO-Gladio-CIA-MIT counter-guerrilla torturers after 40 years? 40 yil sonra NATO-Gladyo-CIA-MIT kontur gerilla iskencecileri? http://www.odatv.com/n.php?n=ibrahim-kaypakkayanin-olum-emrini-halil-berktay-mi-verdi-0905121200

His family got a house for Huseyin Erol in Adapazari while my father pushed me around from house to house and then to Karasu to avoid my contact with the leftists. Ailesi Huseyin Erol’a Adapazari’nda bir ev tutarken babam beni evden eve ve sonunda Karasuya itekledi durdu. Huseyin Erol finished high school but did not go to any college. Huseyin Erol liseyi bitirdi fakat hicbir yuksek okula gitmedi. Years later around village beach movement Huseyin’s elder brother Mustafa Erol clearly told me in the village square that l deserved all suffering I got. Yillar sonra koydeki plaj hareketi sirasinda Huseyin’in abisi Mustafa Erol bana acikca basima gelenlerin hepsini hakettigimi soyledi. But again my brother Sezai Iskender became friends with Mustafa Tuylu in Denmark already who almost murdered me from behind while this Mustafa Erol believed l should totally be destroyed! Fakat yine kardesim Sezai Iskender beni arkadan vurup nerdeyse olduren Mustafa Tuylu ile Danimarka’da arkadas kurarken bu Mustafa Erol benim tamamen mah mahvolmami istiyor! My father is very friendly with Mustafa Erol like my brother Sezai is very friendly with Mustafa Tuylu! Kardesim Sezai nasil Mustafa Tuylu ile arkadassa babam da Mustafa Erol ile oyle arkadastir! All of them are all pointing to and defending my blacklisting and blaming me for it! Bunlarin hepsi benim mimlenmeme isaret ediyorlar ve onu savunuyorlar ve sucu bana yukluyorlar. This never changed! Bu hicbir zaman degismedi!

As I finished my high school, my father beat me up for asking for test preparation book and bus ticket to take the university entrance test. Liseyi bitirdigim yil, babam test hazirlik kitabi ve universiteye giris sinavlarina gitmek icin otobus parasi istedigim icin beni dovdu. I told my situation to another gray wolf neighbor Muhsin Kocmar who just graduated from lnstitute of Journalism in Istanbul. . Gazetecilik Enstitusu’nden yeni mezun olan ulkucu komsumuz Muhsin Kocmar’a durumumu anlattim He had a lot of money and his father was very good to him. Cok parasi vardi ve babasi Muhsini cok seviyordu. Muhsin Kocmar was always brainwashing me against the left. Muhsin Kocmar sola karsi surekli beynimi yikiyordu. Fascist propagandist Muhsin never gave me a test preparation book but had
me read only crappy fascist propaganda books
. Fasist propagandaci Muhsin bana asla bir tek test hazirlik kitabi vermedi ama birsuru berbat fasist propaganda kitabi okuttu.

I thought Muhsin would get me a bus ticket to Adapazari for my test since he never had money problem . Hicbir zaman para sorunu yasamadigi icin Adapazari’ndaki sinava girmek icin benim otobus biletimi Muhsinin alacagini sandim. But he said he trades hazelnuts and I have to work to pick some hazelnuts to earn my ticket money. . Ancak findik ticareti yaptigini ve otobus parasi icin calisarak findik toplamam gerektigini soyledi He made me work for it. Beni calismaya mecbur etti. He extracted profit from my back. Sirtimdan kazanc sagladi. This is fascist solidarity for you from Muhsin. Iste Muhsin’den size fasist dayanismasi. Fasist muhsin did not even ask if l prepared for my university test. Fasist Muhsin universiteye
hazirlanip hazirlanmadigimi sormadi bile. Here: Burda:

http://t.co/ws9a7QVm5z

I took the bus a day before the test to Adapazari. Sinavdan birgun once otobusle
Adapazari’na gittim. l had no place to sleep. Yatacak bir yerim yoktu. I
could not go to my aunts as my father made me an enemy to them
. Babam beni dusman ettigi icin halamlara gidemedim. As my only chance I entered into my former free boarding dormitory building from an unlocked back window and laid in an unlocked empty room. Tek sansim olan eskiden parasiz yatili kaldigim ogrenci yurduna kilitlenmemis olan
arka pencereden gizlice girip kilitlenmemis bos bir odada yattim.

I woke up with car noises and run to my test location. Araba sesleriyle uyandim ve sinav yerime kostum. l saw classmate Seher Erturk from Karasu High
School with her father Imdat Erturk waiting for test.
Karasu Lisesinden tanidigim Seher Erturk ve babasi Imdat Erturk birlikte sinav icin beklerken gordum. Seher was
nice to me and gave me a test preparation book earlier.
Seher bana karsi iyiydi ve sinava hazirlik kitabi vermisti onceden. His father Imdat was selling flour
in the ground floor of the building we lived.

Seherin babasi Imdat oturdugumuz dedeme ait binanin giris katinda un satiyordu. Unfortunately her father Imdat shot to death another villager Ahmet Ak for self defense in his store. Maalesef Seherin babasi Imdat mesru mudafa icin baska bir koylumuz Ahmet Ak’i dukkaninda vurmustu. I think Ahmet Ak was loansharking like Sezai is doing for years now. Galiba Ahmet Ak da kardesim Sezai’nin simdi yillardir yaptigi gibi tefecilik yapiyordu. Ahmet Ak had a lot hazelnuts and never needed any money from loansharking like bloodsucker leech. Ahmet Ak’in cok findigi vardi ve bir kan emici suluk gibi tefecilik parasina hic ihtiyaci yoktu. I am very sorry that this unfortunate incident happened to golden hearted Seher. Bu talihsiz olayin altin kalpli Seher’in babasina olmasindan cok
uzgunum. Cruelty must stop. Vahsilik sona ermeli.

Meanwhile my father was very sure that he already burned me totally. Bu sirada, babam artik beni tamamen yaktigindan cok emindi. My father would never expect me to win any college. Babam asla benim bir universite kazanmami beklemezdi. He reduced me from a winner student in Haydarpasa into a loser student in Karasu! Babam beni Haydarpasa’da kazanan ogrenci durumundan Karasu’da kaybeden ogrenci durumuna indirgemisti. Because it took years of preparation in special classes for most Karasu High School grads to win a college. Cunku cogu Karasu Lisesi ogrencisi bir
universite kazanmak icin yillarca hazirlik kurslarina gidiyordu. My father did not get me test book let alone sending me to preparation classes! Babam birakin dersaneye yollamak bir test kitabi bile almamisti! Why does a fascist hitman need a test book? Niye bir fasist tetikcinin test kitabina ihtiyaci olsun?

I had extremely unfortunate incidents within 3 years in high school. Lisede 3 yil icinde son derece talihsiz bircok olay yasamistim. My father forced me to change 3 schools and 5 dormitory-houses according to his own pleasure! Babam beni kendi keyfine gore 3 okul ve 5 yurt-ev degistirmeye mecbur etmisti! In this 3 years, my father used me as hitman and almost got me kill my sister, her husband and rape her girlfriend. Babam bu uc yilda beni tetikci olarak kullanmis, nerdeyse bana kizkardesimi ve kocasini oldurtmus ve kizkardesimin kiz arkadasina tecavuz ettirmisti. In this time because of my my father’s provocations, l was almost shot to kill from behind by leftist Mustafa Tuylu. Bu zamanda babamin tahrikleri sonucu solcu Mustafa Tuylu tarafindan nerdeyse arkadan vurularak oldurulmustum. In this time again due to my father’s provocations, I was expelled by Karasu high school principle Resat Sirin outside province borders and sentenced for 6 months postponed prison by Karasu criminal court too just for freedom of expression, right of defense and criticism by writing “principle is protecting communists” in my defense. Bu zaman icinde yine babamin tahrikleriyle Karasu Lisesi Müdürü Resat Sirin tarafindan “müdür komunistleri tutuyor” diye savunma yazarak ifade ozgurlugumu, savunma ve elestiri hakkimi kullandigim icin liseden Sakarya il sinirlari disina surulmus ve Karasu asliye ceza Mahkemesi tarafindan ertelenen 6 ay hapse mahkum edilmistim.

So my father absolutely forgot about my school until I received the test result mail. Boylece sinav sonuc mektubu gelene kadar babam benim okulumu tamamen unuttu. That year, I won the Faculty of Political Sciences despite these incidents. O yil, bu olaylara ragmen Siyasal Bilgiler Fakultesi’ni kazandim. The college was leader in its area. Siyasal alaninda lider bir okuldu. Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ankara_Üniversitesi_Siyasal_Bilgiler_Fakültesi

Tahir Iskender, son of uncle Mithat Iskender, came to me with my letter and told me l won the political sciences. Mithat Iskender amcamin oglu Tahir Iskender elinde benim mektubumla geldi ve Siyasal’i kazandin dedi. He was nosey and already opened my letter.
Merakli idi ve benim mektubumu acmisti. He used me before as security hitman to extract his family’s stolen hazelnuts from house of Suleyman Altinsoy in Kuyumcullu. Daha once beni ailesinin calinan findiklarini kurtarmak icin muhafiz tetikci olarak beni Suleyman
Altinsoy’un evine goturmustu. Because he knew l was a fascist hitman carrying loaded browning handgun with 14 bullets in it all the time. Cunku herzaman fasist tetikci
olarak 14’lu tabancayla 14 mermi dolu olarak dolastigimi biliyordu. Here: Burda:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Browning_Hi-Power He did not look for me instead he passed all day before he gave it to me. Simdi beni arayip bulmak yerine tersine butun gun mektubumla dolasmisti. He was biology student and won College of Law in Istanbul in the same time.mBiyoloji ogrencisiydi ve benle ayni anda Istanbul’da Hukuk Fakultesini kazanmisti. He became lawyer and worked in Adapazari. Adapazari’nda avukat olarak calisti.

He never helped to my long legal struggle to return to my career against the Gladio Ozceri. Gladyo Mustesari Ozceriye karsi meslegime donmek icin yaptigim uzun
hukuk mucadelemde bana asla yardim etmedi.When I wanted to sell my car before l started my 3 marches l went to speak with him about car transaction. 3 yuruyusumu yapmadan once arabamin satis islemiyle ilgili avukat Tahirin yanina konusmaya gittim. He wanted to transfer my car on his name by tricking me.Beni kandirarak arabami ustune gecirmek istedi.

Years ago during my first signature campaign after village beach struggle and substitute teacher work, I visited Tahir’s law office in 1991. 1991 yilinda koyumuzun plaj mucadelesinden ve Kocaali’de vekil ogretmenlik isinden sonra imza kampanyami yaparken avukat Tahir’i burosunda ziyaret ettim. Attorney Tahir was with my leftist cousin Yusuf Erturk. Avukat Tahir burosunda halamin oglu solcu Yusuf Erturk ile oturuyordu. Tahir let Yusuf Erturk insult me as to starve unemployed real teachers by stealing job from them as working as substitute teacher in Kocaali high school. Tahir fadime halamin oglu solcu Yusuf Erturk’un Kocaali Lisesinde vekil ogretmenlik yaparak issiz gercek ogretmenlerin isini caldigimi ve onlari ac biraktigimi soyleyip bana burosunda hakaret etmesine musaade etti.

etti. Fascist Lawyer Tahir Iskender and Socialist Worker Party of Turkey (TSIP) executive commitee member Yusuf Erturk together had fun torturing me while I was struggling to return my career as a victim of Gladyo Mustesari Ozceri! Fasist Avukat Tahir Iskender and Turkiye Sosyalist Isci Partisi (TSIP) Merkez Yonetim Kurulu uyesi Yusuf Erturk birlikte bana meslegime geri donebilmek icin mucadele ettigim Gladyo Mustesari Ozceri’nin bir kurbani olarak iskence etmekten zevk aldilar. So Yusuf had hated me while he loved coming to see Tahir! Yani Yusuf benden nefret ederken fasist Tahir’i gormeyi seviyordu.

Tahir’s younger brother Tayyip also kept me talking while leftist Mustafa Tuylu tried to shoot me behind and run away while an old man named Nuri Kaymak hit me from behind with his cane while I was trying to unarm my attacker! Tahirin genc kardesi Tayyip beni lafa tutarken solcu Mustafa Tuylu arkadan beni vurmaya kalkmis ve ben donup tutukluk yapan tabancayi almaya calisirken ihtiyar Nuri Kaymak arkadan bana bastonla vurup Mustafa’yi kurtarirken Tayyip kacip gitmisti.

Yusuf Erturk spoke to me directly only one another time in
my life which was when l was in their house and in free boarding student dormitory in the
Adapazari Central High School.
Yusuf Erturk hayatimda bir kere daha benle konusmustu o da ben evlerinde kalirken ve Adapazari Merkez Lisesinde Parasiz yatili ogrenci olarak yurtta
kalirken benimle konusmustu. In their house Yusuf Erturk was trying to impress me with the might of the Soviet Union which actually made a backlash effect on me and worried me about freedoms of peoples especially Turkish-origin people living there. Yusuf Erturk evlerinde beni Sovyetler Birligi’nin gucu ile etkilemeye calisiyordu ki bu aslinda orada yasayan Turkler olmak uzere halklarin ozgurlukleri konusunda bende aksine tesir birakti ve urkuttu. Yusuf Erturk also spoke to me while I was living in the free boarding dormitory around the corner and tried to impress me that his comrades were in charge of the dormitory. Yusuf Erturk ben kosedeki ogrenci yurdunu parasiz yatili sinaviyla kazanip oraya gecince yine yurdun kendi yandaslarinin idaresinde oldugunu soyleyerek beni etkilemeye calisti.

Yusuf Erturk was very bitter and tried to impress me with his political choice Soviet Union and dormitory director friend as my father constantly harassed and beat him. Yusuf Erturk, babamdan surekli baski ve dayak yedigi icin bana karsi tepkiliydi ve siyasi tercihi olan Sovyetler Birligi ve yurt müdüru arkadasi ile beni etkilemeye calisiyordu. One day
Yusuf Erturk caught me when i visited my aunt Fadime after school and impressed me that his comrades became managers in my free boarding dormitory.
Birgun okuldan sonra ziyarete gittigim Fadime halamin evinde Yusuf Erturk bana Parasiz kaldigim yurda yeni tayin olan idarecilerin kendi arkadaslari oldugunu soyleyerek beni etkiledi.

So I was caught as innocent poor student in a political feud between my fascist father and my leftist cousin Yusuf Erturk who tried to use his dormitory management friends to stop my father’s violent assault and threats on him. Yani masum bir ogrenci olarak fasist babam ile babamin siddetli saldiri ve tehditlerini durdurabilmek icin yurt yoneticisi arkadaslarini kullanmaya calisan solcu hala oglu Yusuf Erturk arasinda kalmistim. My father assaulted and insulted Yusuf Erturk so much and took me out of their house as part of his hostility against him. Babam solcu Yusuf Erturk’e cok saldirdi ve hakaret etti ve ona olan dusmanligindan dolayi beni o evden cikartti. There was never a problem between me and my cousin up until my father provoked us against each other like he used me as hitman against my own sister and brothers! Beni kiz ve erkek kardeslerime karsi tetikci olarak kullanirken oldugu gibi benimle hala oglu arasinda babam bizi birbirimize karsi kiskirtana kadar asla hicbir sorun yoktu. I avoided any physical trouble from my father’s use of me as hitman against my siblings but his political provocations almost caused my death, my blacklisted and tortured life and troubles in my diplomatic career. Babamin beni kendi oz kardeslerime karsi tetikci olarak kullanmasindan ve bizi birbirimize karsi kiskirtmasindan dolayi fiziksel bir sorun olmadan siyrilmayi basardi ancak siyasal kiskirtmalari nerdeyse beni olduruyordu, mimli ve iskence dolu bir hayat yasamama ve diplomatik kariyerimde sorunlara neden oldu.

My goal in writing my autobiography is only to do truth work. Otobiyografimi yazmamdaki amacim sadece gercek calismasi yapmaktir. Truth work is to remember and analyze all my life and replace all false knowledge with the truth. Gercek calismasi, butun hayatimi hatirlamak ve incelemek ve tum yalanlarin yerine gercegi koymaktir. All negative stuff is result of lie and false knowledge which must be replaced with truth. Tum kotu seyler yerine gercegin koyulmasi gereken yalan ve yanlis bilgi sonucudur. When we replace all the bad stuff which is based on false knowledge, with truth it will set us free. Yanlis bilgiye dayanan kotu seylerin yerine dogrulari koydugumuz zaman gercek herkesi ozgurlestirir. Ozgurluk

Yusuf Erturk’s comrade manager in the dormitory in a night time stopped me at the stairs by the gate and lectured me about fascist police state and how cops tortured his female comrade by shoving batons into her genitals. Yusuf Erturk’un Yoldasi olan yurt Müdürü bir gece diskapi merdivenlerinde beni durdurdu ve fasist polis devletini bana anlatti ve polislerin bir bayan yoldasinin cinsel organina cop sokarak iskence yaptiklarini bana anlatti.

Another day the same leftist dormitory manager while eating his lunch ordered me to fill his empty aluminum water jar on his table from the water taps nearby as l was leaving dining hall after l finished my meal. Bir baska gun yememi bitirip yemekhaneden cikarken yine ayni solcu yurt müdürü yemek yedigi masanin uzerinde duran bos surahiyi su musluklarindan doldurmami emretti. As the manager claims he is an anti-oppressive person he should not use a student as his personal servant which is forbidden even in Turkish laws. Müdür somuruye karsi oldugunu iddia ettigi icin Turk mevzuatinin bile yasakladigi gibi bir ogrenciyi kolesi olarak kullanmaya kalkismamasi gerekirdi. Leftist Yusuf Erturk’s and dormitory manager’s contradictions pushed me more to my father’s fascist mindset and follow my father’s orders to join the gray wolves. Solcu Yusuf Erturk’un ve yurt mudurunun celiskileri beni babamin fasist kafa yapisina daha cok itti ve ulku ocagina katilma icin babamin emirlerini uyguladim.

The man who took me to gray wolves center in Adapazari first time was the groom to Abali family in our village is doing politics and business as construction builder in Adapazari . Beni ilk kez ulku ocaklarina goturen kisi koyumuzdeki Abali ailesinin damadidir ve Adapazari’nda muteahhitlik ve politika yapmaktadir. This fascist groom of our village slaved me to load and unload his truck for free and engaged me in training in the gray wolves. Koyumuzun bu fasist damadi kamyonunu yukleyip bosaltma islerinde gelip beni bedava kole olarak kullandi ve ulku ocaklarinda beni fasist egitimine baslatti. When this groom of our village was Adapazari Head of Great Unity Party he did not even speak with me for one minute as I visited him to get back to my diplomatic career. Koyumuzun bu muteahhit damadi Adapazari Buyuk Birlik Partisi baskani iken Disisleri gorevime donmek icin kendisini ziyarete gittigimde benimle bir dakika bile konusmadi.

My father’s provocation forced me to the exploitation of leftist dormitory manager which pushed me to exploitation of the groom of our village who is best man of my father. Babamin provokasyonu beni solcu yurt mudurunun istismarina zorladi ki bu da beni babamin cok iyi bir adami olan koyumuzun damadinin istismarina itti. My father prevented me to be friendly with my leftist cousin and forced me to be prey for the gray wolves with the groom of our village! Babam solcu hala oglu ile yakinligimi onledi ve beni koyumuzun damadiyla ulku ocaklarina beni yem olmaya mecbur etti.

I knew leftist dormitory manager was trying to provoke me by treating me like a slave so l calmly filled the jar and saw him as I turned to door spying on me right by the door. Solcu yurt mudurunun bana koleymisim gibi davranarak bana karsi provakosyon yapmak istedigini anladigim icin sakin bir sekilde surahiyi doldurdum ve kapiya dondugumde onu tam kapinin yaninda beni gizlice gozetlerken gordum. Dormitory manager said he was spying on me to
see if l spit inside the jar and l passed the spit test.
Yurt Müdürü surahiye tukurup tukurmeyecegimi gormek icin beni gozetledigini ve tukuruk testini gectigimi soyledi.

By the way, it was during 42nd government from January 5, 1978 till November 12, 1979 which was run by leftist Bulent Ecevit. Sirasi gelmisken, bu yurt olayi 5 Ocak 1978 tarihinden 12 Kasım 1979 tarihine kadar suren solcu Bulent Ecevit tarafindan kurulan 42.ci hukumet doneminde oldu. http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/42._Türkiye_Hükûmeti I was never bothered by the high school management or by any teacher at all in school in Istanbul or in Adapazari. Istanbul’da veya Adapazari’nda hicbir okul-yurt yoneticisi veya ogretmen tarafindan asla rahatsiz edilmedim. I was very good student liked by my all teachers in fact for passing the free boarding test without even looking at any test book as I was taken to the test by my father without any notice. Babam tarafindan hicbir uyari yapilmadan ve hicbir test kitabina bakmadan ansizin girdigim parasiz yatili sinavini kazandigim icin gercekten butun ogretmenlerim tarafindan sevildim.

I was also selected for wrestling team and exercising regularly but could not win medals as I did not have any coach to guide me to exercise in my free times. Gures takimina da secilmis ve duzenli olarak antrenmanlara da giriyordum ama bos zamanlarimda calismaya yonlendirecek hicbir antrenorum olmadigi icin madalya alamadim.

Actually I wanted to help our village youth to learn how to wrestle under our apartment building but my father trashed my press clippings and cursed at me for wrestling idea, evicted me with beating and threats just after village beach struggle in 1990. Gercekten, 1990 yilinda koyumuzun plaj mucadelesinden hemen sonra apartman binamizin altinda koylu cocuklara gures yapmayi ogretmek istiyordum fakat babam gazete kupurlerimi alip yirtti ve gures icin bana sovup doverek tehditlerle beni binadan atti.

After the spit test leftist management in the dormitory never bothered me but my father did not like the fact that dormitory managers are leftist and pulled me from Adapazari to Karasu.
Tukuruk testinden sonra solcu yonetim beni rahatsiz etmedi ama babam sol idareden hoslanmadigi icin beni Adapazari’ndan Karasu’ya cekti.

When l received the official letter notifying me about my university exam result I took the letter to my father immediately. Universite giris sinav sonuc mektubunu alinca mektubu derhal babama goturdum. After he read the letter he acted like l was leper or devil. Babam mektubu okuduktan sonra bana sanki cuzzamli veya seytanmisim gibi davrandi.
He avoided speaking with me all the time. Benle konusmaktan hep kacti. I started complaining about this to his buddies in the village. Koyde babamin yakin arkadaslarina sikayete basladim. His acts gave me the impression that he
thinks I am a devil and my study will worsen everything.
Babamin hareketlerinden sanki beni bir seytanmisim gibi gordugu ve okursam herseyin daha da kotulesecegini dusundugu izlenimini aldim. Therefore he blocked my registration to the college until the last day. Boylece son gune kadar Siyasal’a kaydimi engelledi. My father tried to destroy my registration chance! Babam kayit sansimi yok etmeye calisti!

Nobody in my family or Iskender clan tried to get me to registration. Ailemden veya Iskender sulalesinden hickimse beni kayita goturmek istemedi. Both my gran parents were spending so much money for showy religious and other charities but never wanted to get me to my registration. Her iki dedem de gosterisci dini ve oteki yardimlara buyuk paralar harcadilar ama beni kayita goturmek istemediler.

My father extracted a fortune by using me as a hitman on my sister, her husband and her girlfriend but now he did not get me to my registration until the last day! Babam kucuk bir servet kopartmak icin ablami ve kocasini vurmak icin beni tetikci olarak kullanip bir servet kopartti ama beni son gune kadar kayita goturmedi!

Even though my grandfather Osman Cavus had so much money to build 2 different apartment buildings and a multi-story religious school he never even cared that I almost missed my registration! Osman Cavus dedem iki apartman binasi ve bir cok katli dini okul binasi dikecek kadar parasi olmasina ragmen benim kayit gununu nerdeyse kacirmama hic aldiris etmedi bile!

My father was totally against me going to my college. Babam, siyasal’a gitmeme son derece karsiydi. The same fascist gray Wolfe neighbor Muhsin Kocmar also
spoke all against my college like my father.
Ayni fasist ulkucu komsum Muhsin Kocmar da babam gibi kazandigim Siyasal aleyhine konusuyordu. My father and fascist Muhsin
Kocmar ridiculed me that I would be a worthless head of town in a forgotten part of the country as a representative of the state at the town.
Babam ve bu fasist komsu Muhsin Kocmar
memleketin ucra bir yerinde devletin bir kaymakami olacaksin deyip benle alay ediyorlardi.

My father also said business schools are much better to put me down!
Babam beni kucuk dusurmek icin isletme okullarinin Siyasal’dan daha iyi oldugunu soyledi. I told him there is best business and finance departments inside my college but he did not care at all! Babama Siyasalin icinde en iyi isletme ve maliye bolumleri
oldugunu soyledim ama hic onemsemedi.

Very close friends of my father secretly told me that he does not want me to
study at all.
Babamin cok yakin arkadaslari bana gizlice babamin beni hic okutmak istemedigini soylediler. My father thought that he can stop me.
Babam beni durdurabilecegini sandi. I started complaining and forced him to register me
in the college.
Sikayetlere basladim ve babami beni Siyasal’a kayit yapmaya mecbur ettim.

However, my father beat me up in the bus on the way traveling to Ankara to
register in the college
. Babam, Siyasal’a kayit yaptirmak icin otobusle giderken yolda beni dovdu. My cousin Muhsin Iskender was in the bus to help me in the
registration
. Amcaoglu Muhsin Iskender kayit icin yardimci olmak amaciyla otobuste bizimleydi. Muhsin was high school graduate and working in Karasu Tax Office. Muhsin lise mezunu idi ve Karasu Vergi Dairesinde calisiyordu. Muhsin was with us as he knew Ankara where he lived to participate in an internal training course run by Ministry of Finance. Muhsin, Maliye Bakanliginin Ankara’da duzenledigi hizmet ici kursa katildigi icin Ankara’yi bildiginden bizimle idi.

However Muhsin never mentioned that his sister’s husband also graduated from my college and was a high ranking official in the Ministry of Fnance. Ancak Muhsin ablasinin kocasinin da Siyasal’dan mezun oldugunu ve Maliye Bakanliginda yuksek burokrat oldugunu bana hicbir zaman soylemedi. Muhsin’s brother Muhittin was police officer and he also never mentioned this fact. Muhsinin kardesi Muhittin de polis memuru idi ve o da enistelerinden hic bahsetmemisti. If Muhsin can help me because he was in Ankara for a few months now you imagine how much support I could get from that finance ministry bureaucrat! Eger Ankara’da sadece birkac ay kalan Muhsin bana yardim edebiliyorsa bu Maliye Bakanligi burokratinin ne kadar yardim edebilecegini artik siz hayal edin.

Muhsin knew my father will starve me and promised to me that he would change my father which he never changed! Muhsin babamin beni ac birakacagini biliyordu ve bana babamin hareketini degistirecegini soyleyip soz verdi ki bu konuda hicbirsey yapmadi. The right action would be to get student dormitory and scholarships with the help of Finance Ministry bureaucrat from the beginning. Dogru hareket tarzi Maliye Bakanligi burokratinin yardimiyla yurt ve burslar bulmakti.

My cousin Muhsin tried to relax my father while he was assaulting me on the bus as I said I am hungry. Muhsin acim dedigim icin bana vurup soverken babami sakinlestirmeye calisti. Muhsin was fond of my college. Muhsin Siyasal’i seviyordu. My
father was so mad at me as I said I was hungry.
Karnim ac deyince babam bana cok sinirlendi.

Muhsin said he lost my most important result letter as we arrived at the registration table in the college in the very final day! Muhsin Siyasal’da kayitlarin son gunu kayit masasina vardigimizda en onemli belgem olan sinav sonuc belgesini kaybettigini soyledi! Fortunately manager let us go to national exam center to get an official duplicate later in the same day. Talihliydim ki yetkili müdür sinav merkezinden resmi bir ornek alip ayni gun gecikerek gelmemize izin verdi.

On the way coming back to village Muhsin took the express blue train and made me drunk by giving me beers first time in my life. Koye donuste Muhsin ekspres mavi trene bindi ve hayatimda ilk kez bana bira icirip beni sarhos etti. I was only 17 and served beers by official state train crew under military regime! Yasim sadece 17 idi ve askeri rejim altinda devletin treninde gorevliler tarafindan bana bira servisi yapildi!

Muhsin helped my father and my brothers as arbiter in their secret land share. Muhsin babama ve kardeslerime gizli yer paylasma isinde hakem olarak yardim etti. When I complained about my father Muhsin mentioned his role helping them and pointed out that my father cannot even enjoy his tea as he is very stressed man. Ben babamdan sikayet edince Muhsin yer paylasma isini ilk defa bana acti ve babamin cok strese girdigi icin ictigi caydan tad alamadigini anlatti.

I could not tell Muhsin that his mother also complained to me that he is beating her for money. Muhsin’e kendi annesinin de Muhsin beni para icin dovuyor diye sikayet ettigini soyleyemedim. What about Muhsin’s poor mother beaten by him? Muhsinden dayak yiyen Muhsinin zavalli annesinden ne haber? Can she enjoy her tea? Acaba annesi cayindan tad alabiliyor mu?

When I was about to fly to America Muhsin wanted me to send him money from America to trade hazelnuts. Ben Amerika’ya gelmeden once Muhsin benim amerikadan kendisine findik ticareti icin para yollamami istedi. Muhsin also called me after I came to America from Turkey to ask for trading money. Muhsin Ben Amerika’ya geldikten sonra da beni Turkiyeden ticaret parasi icin telefonla aradi. Muhsin should ask that money from my father and brothers that he helped secretly as arbiter! Muhsin bu parayi gizlice hakem olarak yardim ettigi babam ve kardeslerimden istemesi lazim.

My father also condemned me to starve in the college from then on. Babam Siyasal’da da bundan sonra beni acliga mahkum etti. My father was against my education and always ordered me to find a job to pay for my food and basic needs. Babam okumama karsiydi ve her zaman yiyecek ve temel ihtiyaclarimi karsilamam icin bir is bulmami emretti.

Fascist gray Wolfe neighbor Muhsin Kocmar also moved to Ankara in the same time working for Mersin Itimat bus company owned by Bayramoglu. Fasist Ulkucu komsum Muhsin Kocmar ayni zamanda Bayramogullarina ait Mersin Itimat otobus firmasinda calismak icin Ankara’ya tasindi. But he always refused to support me when I was in
trouble finding food or place to sleep.
Ancak yiyecek yemek ve kalacak yer sikintim oldugunda bana yardim etmeyi reddetti. This is fascist gray Wolfe solidarity for you. Iste bu sizin icin fasist ulkucu dayanismasi!

Muhsin Kocmar always charged me full price on the bus. Muhsin Kocmar otobuste herzaman tam ucret aldi. He never offered any treat! Asla bir sey ismarlamadi! This is fascist solidarity for you. Iste size fasist dayanismasi.

Later on this fascist Muhsin Kocmar moved to Mersin to work in the headquarters in the Mersin Itimat Bus company. Bu fasist Muhsin Kocmar daha sonra Mersin Itimat otobus sirketinin merkezi olan Mersine tasindi. He became chairman of fascist MHP in Mersin. Mersin’de fasist MHP’nin baskani oldu. This title fits Muhsin’s personality perfectly. Muhsin’in kisiligine mukemmel yakisan bir unvan.

Fascist Muhsin never had any money problem and imagined himself as fascist mafia godfather. Fasist Muhsin hicbir zaman para sorunu yasamadi ve kendini fasist mafya
babasi olarak hayal etti. Fascist Muhsin brainwashed me to be his hitman all in black suit in his mafia style black mercedes. Fasist Muhsin mafya usulu siyah takim
elbise icinde siyah mersedesle tetikcisi olmam icin benim beynimi yikiyordu. Fascist Muhsin got the hitman idea from my father and applied it to his taste as a foxy guy. Fasist Muhsin beni tetikci olarak kullanma fikrini babamdan kapti ve kurnaz biri olarak kendi zevkine uyarladi.

Muhsin Kocmar was in his final year in institute of journalism in Istanbul and was mentoring me to be gray Wolfe hitman in my last year in high school in Karasu ! Muhsin Kocmar Istanbul’da Gazetecilik Enstitusunde son siniftaydi ve ben Karasu Lisesinde son siniftayken beni fasist tetikci olarak yetistiriyordu. His uncle Emrullah Kocmar was giving me browning 14-shot pistol and Muhsin was feeding me with fascist books and his intimate friendship. Muhsinin amcasi Emrullah Kocmar bana 14lu tabanca verirken Muhsin bana fasist kitaplarini ve yakin arkadasligini sunuyordu.

Muhsin Kocmar turned against me instantly as soon as he learned l won my college. Siyasal’i kazandigimi duyar duymaz aninda bana karsi cephe aldi. So l
destroyed his dream as well as my father’s.
Boylece babamin oldugu gibi onun ruyasini da mahvetmistim. They could not use me as fascist hitman anymore. Artik beni fasist tetikci olarak kullanamayacaklardi. Now all of sudden, l became a bad boy in the fascist circles in Kuyumcullu and Karasu. Simdi ansizin Kuyumcullu ve Karasu’nun fasist
cevrelerinde kaka cocuk olmustum. They treated me like a leper or devil now. Simdi bana seytan veya cuzzamli muamelesi yapiyorlardi. My gray Wolfe mentors knew that they cannot use me as hitman and they did not want to hear me complaining about my starvation too. Ulkucu akil hocalarim artik beni tetikci olarak kullanamayacaklarini biliyorlar ve benim acliktan sikayet etmemi de duymak istemiyorlardi. Under the military regime there was no need for me confronting the left as it was crushed by the military! Askeri rejim altinda solculara karsi koymak icin bana bir ihtiyac yoktu cunku ordu zaten solu ezmisti. I was worthless as hitman in my new situation so none of them wanted to help my study in Ankara! Yeni durumumda tetikci olarak degersizdim bu yuzden hicbirisi Ankara’da okumama yardim etmek istemiyordu.

Fascist Emrullah Kocmar was living right next to our house and gave me his Browning
14 shot capacity handgun and bullets and some pocket money to use me as fascist hitman before the military regime
. Askeri rejimden once fasist Emrullah Kocmar kapi komsumuzdu ve beni fasist tetikci olarak kullanmak icin bana ondortlu tabanca, mermiler ve cep harcligi veriyordu.
Emrullah Kocmar and his brother fasist Kemal Kocmar were best friends of my fascist father. Fasist Emrullah Kocmar ve kardesi fasist Kemal Kocmar fasist babamin en
yakin komsulari ve dostlariydi. My father was very happy to see me used as fascist hitman by his best buddies. Babam en iyi dostlarinin beni fasist tetikci olarak kullanmasindan cok memnundu.

I had my handgun visible on my belt even we sat together with the Colonel when fascist Kemal Kocmar invited me to greet and drink tea with his brother-in-law Colonel Habil Kucuk in front of tea house in Kuyumcullu. Fasist Kemal Kocmar beni kayincisi olan Albay Habil Kucuk’e hosgeldin demek ve cay icmek icin cagirdiginda Albayla birlikte otururken bile belimdeki ondortlu tabanca acikca goruluyordu. Here: Burda: http://medyabar.com/haber/11072/sakaryada-yetisen-generaller.aspx

My fascist father and his fascist buddies used me as their fascist hitman when I was 17 before the 1980 military takeover. Fasist babam ve fasist yakin arkadaslari 1980 askeri rejiminden once 17 yasimda beni fasist tetikci olarak kullandilar. As I won my college with the coup d’état they turned their back to me as I needed their help to survive but they did not need any body like me in the military regime! Askeri darbe ile birlikte ben Siyasal’i kazaninca bana sirtlarini donduler cunku artik hayatta kalmak icin benim yardima ihtiyacim vardi fakat askeri rejim de onlarin benim gibi birisine ihtiyaclari yoktu. Coup d’état was biggest fascist hitman army itself! Ihtilalin kendisi enbuyuk fasist tetikci ordusu idi zaten!

My father with his best friend Kemal Kocmar was taken to Karasu gendarmerie station and abused by the captain right after the 1980 military takeover because of his gray Wolfe activism. Babam en yakin arkadasi Kemal Kocmar ile beraber 1980 Ihtilali olunca jandarma karakoluna cekildi ve ulkucu faaliyetlerinden dolayi yuzbasidan eziyet gordu. My father and Kemal Kocmar complained about it to me in the village square meanwhile I was never taken to police or gendarmerie station after the 1980 military takeover for political activism. Babam ve Kemal Kocmar koy meydaninda bu olayi bana sikayet ettiler ama ben 1980 darbesinden sonra siyasi faaliyetten dolayi karakola dusmedim. Except when I was taken from Economic Press Agency in 1986 and in my 3 marches and chained protests in 1999! 1986 yilinda Ekonomik Basin Ajansi’ndan alindigim zaman ve 1999 yilinda yaptigim uc yuruyus ve zincirli protestolarim sirasindaki maruz kaldigim tutuklamalar haric!

Eight years later from my first meeting where I had my 14-shot pistol on my belt seen by him, I visited Albay Habil Kucuk in his military office near Istanbul by the main highway just as I began my eight months long mandatory military service.Belimdeki 14lu tabamcayi gordugu ilk gorusmemizden ekiz yil sonra sekiz aylik zorunlu askerlik hizmetime baslayacagim sirada Albay Habil Kucuk’u Istanbula yakin ana yol uzerindeki kislada makaminda ziyaret ettim. Habil Kucuk was having a meeting with his officers and did not make a private meeting with me. Habil Kucuk subaylariyla toplanti yapiyordu ve banimle ozel gorusme yapmadi.

But as I finished my military service Director of Karasu Deed Titles Enver Salman took Colonel Habil Kucuk and me to visit my maternal grandparents in old Salikkaya. Fakat askerligimi bitirince Karasu Tapu Müdürü Enver Salman beni ve Albay Habil Kucuk’u arabaya alip anneannemi ve dedemi ziyarete goturdu.

When l was fired from the Foreign Ministry I learned Habil Kucuk is assigned in the general staff in Ankara l tried to see him but he never called me back. Disisleri’nden
atildiktan sonra Habil Kucuk’un Ankara’da Genel Kurmaya tayin oldugunu ogrenince kendisini gormek icin cok aradim ama bana hic geri donmedi. When I started to work in the
International Press Center in Istanbul in 1991 after my brother Sezai’s shooting incident with my aunt Ayse’s sons l learned that Habil Kucuk became general and assigned to Istanbul and I tried to see
him but again he never called me back.
Kardesim Sezai’nin Ayse halamin ogullariyla karistigi vurgun olayindan sonra ben Uluslararasi Basin Merkezi’nde 1991 yilinda calismaya baslayinca Habil Kucuk’un general olarak Istanbul’a tayin oldugunu ogrendim ve kendisini gormek icin cok aradim ancak bana hic geri donmedi.

In a few day later, General Habil Kucuk was all over in the news with the suicide attempt by his private waiters on Chief of General Staff. Bir kac gun sonra, General Habil Kucuk, kendi ozel garsonlarinin Genelkurmay Baskanina karsi duzenledigi suikast girisimi nedeniyle birinci haber olmustu. Habil Kucuk’s name was involved in assassination attempt by his PKK member waiters against top generals. Albay Habil Kucuk’un adi en ust generallere karsi PKK elemani ozel garsonlarin duzenledigi bir suikasta karisti. Here: Burda:

http://www.sabah.com.tr/Gundem/2012/03/28/3-pasaya-zehirli-kahve-ikram-edildi

Later on General Habil Kucuk’s name was also involved in Ergenekon case. Daha sonra General Habil Kucuk ismi Ergenekon davasina da karisti.
Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Osman_Gürbüz

In the same summer time in 1991 I stayed in fascist Emrullah Kocmar’s empty house while
I worked in the International Press Center but as summer ended my uncle Fahri’s son Abdullah Iskender came home and ejected me from the house saying I cannot stay there any more as his school mates will come soon.
Ayni yaz mevsiminde Uluslararasi Basin Merkezi’nde calisirken fasist Emrullah Kocmar’in bos evinde kaldim fakat yaz bitince Fahri amcamin oglu Abdullah Iskender eve geldi ve okul arkadaslari eve gelecegi icin benim artik evde kalmamin mumkun olmadigini soyleyip beni evden cikardi.

Only a few days ago I was shot by aunt Ayse’s sons and now being ejected by uncle Fahri’s son Abdullah from fascist Emrullah Kocmar’s house who used me as hitman when I was 17. . Sadece birkac gun once Ayse halamin ogullari tarafindan vurulmustum ve simdi de Fahri amcamin oglu Abdullah Iskender tarafindan beni 17 yasimda tetikci olarak kullanan fasist Emrullah
Kocmar’in evinden kovuluyordum. Later on fascist Emrullah Kocmar was shot death and Abdullah Iskender’s brother Tuncay Iskender was sent to prison for shooting that killer for revenge.
Daha sonra fasist Emrullah Kocmar vurularak olduruldu ve Abdullah Iskender’in ozkardesi Tuncay Iskender dayisi Emrullahin katilini intikam icin oldurmekten hapse dustu.

I stayed a while in my half uncle Hakki Iskender’s daughter’s family far way from International Press Center. Uluslararasi Basin Merkezi’nden cok uzakta Hakki Iskender amcamin kizinin ailesi ile bir sure kaldim. Because my father excluded me as usual I had to move in a terrible slum house where I lived until I moved to Ankara as I returned to Foreign Ministry upon court order. Babam beni attigi icin buradan cikip cok kotu bir gecekonduya girdim ve mahkeme karariyla 1992 yilinda Disisleri Bakanligi gorevime donene kadar burda kaldim.

Meanwhile I passed master exams to study international relations in the Marmara University. Bu arada Marmara Universitesi’nin uluslararasi iliskiler master sinavlarini kazandim. But the management in the international press center did not allow me to attend my master classes. Fakat Uluslararasi Basin Merkezi yonetimi master derslerine katilmami engelledi. Here: Burda : http://psir.siyasal.marmara.edu.tr/lisansustu-programi/yukseklisans-programi/

I made a reform project for international press center and campaigned for my project. Uluslararasi Basin Merkezi icin bir reform projesi yaptim ve projem icin kampanyaya basladim. I made letter campaign and visited notable journalists and got some news published to pressure for reform. Mektup kampanyalari yaptim ve onemli gazetecileri ziyaret ettim ve reform icin baski yapmak amaciyla bazi haberler yayinlattim. Here: Burda: http://www.byegm.gov.tr/basinduyurulari.aspx?ahid=267&ac=1 ; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basketmakers’_Kiosk

While I worked in the Center I met and chatted with famous writer Yasar Kemal. Merkez’de calisirken buraya ziyarete gelen unlu yazar Yasar Kemal ile tanistim. Here: Burda : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yaşar_Kemal

I also met and developed a friendship with businessman Uzeyir Garih who was stabbed death later on. Daha sonra bicaklanarak oldurulen isadami Uzeyir Garih ile tanistim ve arkadaslik kurdum. Garih invited me to his office in Alarko Holding center which he co-owned with Ishak Alaton and offered me a manager job in their Moscow office. Garih beni Ishak Alaron ile beraber sahibi oldugu Alarko Holding merkezindeki burosuna davet etti ve Holding’in Moskova burosunda yoneticilik teklif etti. I kindly refused Garih’s offer because I expected to return to my diplomatic career soon as it happened. Garih’in teklifini nazikce reddettim cunku gercekte oldugu gibi Disisleri Bakanligi’na geri donmeyi umuyordum. Here: Burda: http://huseyinsaglam.wordpress.com/2008/12/17/uzeyir-garih/

I was official host in the the international press center for foreign journalists who were invited to Turkey by Turkish government. Uluslararasi Basin Merkezi’nde Turk hukumeti tarafindan Turkiye’ye davet edilen yabanci gazetecilere mihmandarlik yapiyordum. One day I was bullied by a co-host while doing my work in the Marmara Hotel and a bomb squad police officer who is related to me from Daricayiri town, interfered and stopped the bullying and came to my office later on to follow up on the case. Birgun Marmara Otelinde gorevimi yaparken bir is arkadasim tarafindan taciz edildim ve Daricayirli bomba imha uzmani polis akrabam olayda mudahale etti ve tacizi engelledi ve durumumu takip etmek icin daha sonra isyerime geldi.

Another day I got doctor’s note from Haydarpasa Hospital and was resting in my home in Sultanbeyli due to my stress from hassles for my reform project. Bir baska gun reform projeme karsi baskilarin yarattigi stresten dolayi Haydarpasa hastanesinden Doktor raporu alip Sultanbeylideki evimde istirahate cekildim. I was in the entrance level of two-story building and when I woke up from the noises outside I noticed that a van was leaving the area. Almanyada calisan bir aileye ait iki katli bir evin giris katinda oturuyordum ve
disardaki seslerden uyandigim zaman bir minibusun uzaklastigini gordum. Press and Information Istanbul Director Orhan Tasan sent 2 supervisors with a driver to check if I was home wasting all day! Basin-Yayin ve Enformasyon Istanbul Il Müdürü Orhan Tasan benim evde olup olmadigimi tespit etmek icin iki muduru bir soforle gondermis ve bir gunu bunun icin harcamisti. Rightist Director Tasan tried to punish me for they did not find me at home but I disproved him with many witnesses! Sagci Müdür Tasan beni evde bulamadiklari icin cezalandirmaya calisti ama ben bircok sahit gostererek gayretlerini cikardim. Here: Burda: http://bianet.org/bianet/print/82931-devletle-meslek-arasinda; http://www.hurriyet.com.tr/gundem/10421205.asp

Rightist Tasan tried to send me to prison after I returned to Foreign Ministry by falsely charging that l lied in the job application form that I never worked in the Foreign Ministry before! Sagci Tasan basvuru formunda daha once Disisleri gorevinde calismadigimi yazarak yalan beyanda bulunmaktan ayrica haksiz bir ceza davasi acti. I disproved rightist Orhan Tasan’s false charge by requesting the said application form and showed that there was not even a question about any past work! Sagci Orhan Tasan’in suclamasini sozkonusu basvuru formunu mahkemeye getirterek curuttum ve gecmis calismamla ilgili bir soru bile sorulmadigini gosterdim.

In the meantime rightist Orhan Tasan fired me for speaking to press after I returned to the Foreign Ministry. Ayni zamanda Sagci Orhan Tasan ben Disisleri’ne dondukten sonra basina beyan vermekten beni memuriyetime son verdi. Upon Tasan’s termination the Foreign Ministry terminated my position again within a few months. Tasan’in gorevime son vermesine dayanan Disisleri birkac ay icinde yeniden gorevime son verdi.

As I helplessly started to work as diplomatic correspondent for Briefing diplomatic magazine and Gunaydin newspaper the foreign ministry got me fired from them too! Mecburen Diplomatik Briefing dergisinde ve Gunaydin Gazetesinde Diplomatik muhabir olarak calismaya baslayinca Disisleri beni onlardan da attirdi.

Back to my college again. Siyasal’a donelim yine. My father always ordered me to find a job to buy my food and other basic needs to cut my chances of study. Babam egitim sansimi oldurmek icin yemek ve oteki temel ihtiyaclarimi karsilamak icin surekli is bulmami emretti. My father constantly ordered and forced me
to find a night shift job in a hotel and come back to report to him every week or two at minimum
. Babam surekli olarak bir otelin gece vardiyasinda calismami ve her hafta veya en azindan
iki haftada bir haftasonu tatilinde koye gidip kendisini gormemi emretti ve zorladi.

So I was not to find any time to study wasting all time in a terrible hotel job and on terrible
interstate buses trying to see and listen to oppressive talk of my dictator father.
Boylece tum zamanimi berbat bir otel isinde ve berbat sehirlerarasi otobuslerde diktator babamin baskici konusmasini dinlemek icin ziyan edecektim. He forced me to work and report to him like this by starving me! Bu sekilde beni calismaya ve kendisini gormeye beni ac
birakarak mecbur ediyordu! Nonstop work and travel would certainly put me to sleep in my classes. Hic durmadan calisma ve seyahat beni derslerde uyumaya ve basarisizliga
mahkum edecekti. It was absurd that if you have to work like poorman but you are traveling so much like a richman. Bir fakir gibi calismaya zorlanirken bir
zengin gibi asiri seyahat etmek son derece sacmaydi. This was my father’s plan to burn me. Bu babamin beni yakma planiydi.

For years he refused to support me and ordered me to go to my paternal grandfather Osman Cavus in his house to ask for food and bus money. Yillarca beni bakmayi reddetti, yemek ve otobus parasi istemek icin Osman Cavus dedemin evine gitmemi emretti.
My grandfather Osman Cavus spent so much money to build 3 buildings and he donated one of them for religious school in Kuyumcullu while they starved me! Osman Cavus dedem Kuyumcullu koyunde din egitimi vermek amaciyla cok katli bir bina yaptirmak icin cok buyuk paralar harcadi. He built two apartment buildings in the Kuyumcullu center! Kuyumcullu Merkez’de iki ayri apartman binasi yaptirmisti! One has 3 levels and the other has five levels. Birisi uc katli digeri de bes katliydi.

Grandfather Osman was super generous to his buildings and religious school but super cheap to me. Osman Cavus dedem binalarina ve din okuluna karsi son derece comert bana karsi ise son derece cimriydi. Uncle Bilal Iskender’s son Osmar Hizir Iskender always ridiculed this strangeness. Bilal amcamin oglu Osman Hizir Iskender bu acayiplikle her zaman alay ederdi. Many people found this bizarre in those years. O yillarda bircok insan bunu cok acayip bulmustu. But my family was so meager to me. Fakat bana karsi cok cimriydi.

My visits back to Kuyumcullu in each time became worse than death. Kuyumcullu’ya ziyaretim her seferinde olumden beter hale geliyordu. Each time my aunt Mumine living with my grandfather was harassing me like “why do you bother your grandfather?, he is sick in his bed!, he does not have money!, why does your my elder brother send you here!?”. Her seferinde dedemle oturan Mumine halam “niye dedeni rahatsiz ediyorsun?, hasta yataginda yatiyor!, parasi yok!, abim niye seni buraya yolluyor?!” diyerek beni sikistirirdi.

I think my father, grandfather and aunt Mumine altogether forced me into this money torture to drive me crazy and commit suicide like my mother. Babam,
dedem ve Mumine halam beni cildirtmak ve intihar ettirmek icin bu para iskencesine soktular.

My father brainwashed all his family that l destroy his economy by going to school. Babam benim okula giderek ekonomisini mahvettigim yalaniyla butun herkesin
beynini yikamisti.

One day when l stopped by to visit her in her house in Sogut on my way to my college my elder sister Nezahat yelled at me like “you robbed my father, took all his money”. Siyasal’a giderken yolumun ustundeki Sogut’te oturan Ablam Nezahat Iskender’i ziyarete ugradigimda bana “babami soydun para birakmadin” diye kizip bagirmisti.

My elder sister Nezahat Iskender could yell to me as much as she could but could not even imagine to even mention that my half brother Ozcan Iskender who traded stocks while he was in college living like a king!. Ozablam Nezahat bana gucu yettigince
bagirabilirdi ama universitedeyken borsada hisse senetleriyle
oynayip kral gibi yasayan uvey kardesim Ozcan’a karsi tek bir laf bile edemezdi. My real elder sister Nezahat sees our step mother as her real mother and me as half brother! Ozablam Nezahat uvey annemi ozannesi olarak, beni de uvey kardesi olarak goruyor! This is my father’s brain wash. Bu babamin beyin yikamasidir.

My father had massive experience in torture and
deception to my mother, did not he?
Babam, anneme karsi
iskence ve yalan konusunda cok buyuk tecrube sahibi olmustu,
degil mi?

If my father had to give some money for my education he said to my face many times that he felt like he is burning his money! Babam eger egitimim icin para verdiyse bile parasini yakmis gibi hissettigini bircok kere yuzume karsi soyledi!

But he always showed his luxury hotel bills to me to brag while I starved. Ancak ben aclik cekerken herzaman bana kaldigi luks otelin faturalarini gosterip hava atti. One day I was working and living in a small hotel as to make and serve tea right by Kizilay square and studying when I have any spare time and my father showed up and asked me “what is written here take a look at this” what is written on his luxury hotel receipt that he stayed overnight around the corner. Bir gun Kizilay meydaninda kucuk bir otelin cay ocaginda calisip yasarken ve bos zamanlarda derslerimle ilgilenirken babam geldi ve hemen yakinda geceledigi luks otelde odedigi faturayi “bunda ne yaziyor buna bir bak” diye bana uzatti. So I realized then that my father came a day before to Ankara and stayed away from me a whole day! Boylece babamin birgun onceden Ankara’ya geldigini ve bana hic haber vermeden luks bir otelde kaldigini boylece anlamis oldum.

While he lives luxuriously like a boss he starves me like a slave. Kendisi bir patron gibi luks yasarken beni bir kole gibi ac birakiyordu. It was same like my grandfather
Osman Cavus bragged that he has 3 apartment buildings, one of them is donated for religious school while he kept me starving in Ankara.
Bu, Osman cavus dedemin beni
Ankara’da ac birakirken Kuyumculluda birisini din okulu olarak bagisladigi uc apartman binam var diye ovunmesi ile aynidir.

This is like my father buying many totally useless and biggest size water pump engines, spending big money to burn forest, buying new lands and building two story luxury house while starving me in Ankara. Bu, babamin beni Ankara’da ac birakirken hicbir ise yaramayan en buyuk boy su motorlarindan cok sayida almasi, orman yakmak icin buyuk para harcamasi, yeni yerler almasi ve iki katli luks ev yapmasi gibidir.

This is like my family was building a 50 cow capacity factory farm attached with a new house, buying brand new luxury Opel car and brand new farm tractor with its semitrailer and other equipments while I starved in Ankara. Bu, ben Ankara’da aclik cekerken ailemin Salikayaya yaninda bir evle beraber 50 bas kapasiteli modern ahir yapmasi, romorkuyle beraber sifir bir traktor, tarim aletleri ile sifir bir luks Opel araba almasi gibidir.

This is like my brother Sezai and Murat living like king in Denmark gambling and womanizing full time on the monies from their wives and children. Bu, ben Ankara’da ac
kalirken kardesim Sezai’nin ve Murat’in Danimarka’da eslerinin ve
cocuklarin paralarini kumar masalarinda ve kadin pesinde yiyip
krallar gibi yasamasi gibidir.

This is like my brother living like kings with the lands they secretly took from my father and maternal uncle Hasan. Bu, ben Ankara’da boyle aclik cekerken kardeslerimin babamdan ve Hasan dayimdan aldiklari yerlerle krallar gibi yasamasi gibidir.

My father’s favorite insult to me was always yelling “drop off my collar”. Babamin en sevdigi hakaret sekli her zaman “yeter dus yakamdan” diye bagirmakti.

My father refused to co-sign and blocked my student loan to starve me. Babam beni ac birakabilmek icin kredi formlarini imzalamayi reddetti ve ogrenci kredimi surekli engelledi.
Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki Yüksek_Öğrenim_Kredi_ve_Yurtlar_Kurumu

My father got so mad as he learned that I had scholarship from the Office of Dean to escape his starvation. Babam dayattigi acliktan kurtulmak amaciyla Dekanliktan karnimi
doyurmak icin burs aldigimi ogrenince cok sinirlendi.mDean Prof. Necdet Serin and Deputy Dean Prof. Guney Devrez decided to give me this scholarship and l took my cheque
every month directly from Prof. Guney Devrez for my third and fourth year.
Dekan Yardimcisi Prof. Guney Devrez and Dekan Prof. Necdet Serin bu bursu bana vermeye birlikte karar
verdiler ve ucuncu ve dorduncu sinifta her ay Prof. Guney Devrez’in bizzat kendisinden cekimi aldim. This was totally dishonoring because I believe every human being should get everything totally free like food, housing, education, healthcare, transportation and all. Bu tamamen onur kiriciydi cunku ben insanoglunun gida, konut, egitim, saglik, ulasim gibi herseyi tumden parasiz olarak hakettigine inaniyorum. Basic needs are human rights! Temel ihtiyaclar insan hakkidir!

My scholarship was from Babur Tarikahya Foundation. Bursum Babur Tarikahya Vakfi’ndan geliyordu. Here: Burda: http://www.baybul.com/dernekler/1005943-babur-tarikahya-vakfi.html Babur Tarikahya was a Turkish diplomat.
Babur Tarikahya bir Turk diplomatiydi. Here: Burda: http://www.taiwantoday.tw/ct.asp?xItem=164991&CtNode=451

My father could not hold his tears from his eyes as he realized that he could not torture me with his money anymore. Babam artik bana parasiyla iskence edemeyecegini anlayinca gozlerine dolan yaslarini tutamadi. He was like a sadist who lost his torture victim. Iskence kurbanini elimden kaciran bir sadist gibiydi. I told him all.
Ona herseyi soyledim.

I was working as tea service guy in the main bus terminal in Ankara while l took my
classes in my college.
Ankara’daki buyuk otobus terminalinde cayci
olarak calisirken Siyasal’da derslere giriyordum. After I finished my work I was looking for a night job better than tea serviceman as my father always brainwashed me. Babamin herzaman beynimi yikadigi sekilde cayciliktan daha iyi bir gece isi bakiyordum.

I spoke with a baker in Kolej neighborhood to ask for a job who advised me to speak with the Office of Dean for help. Kolej semtinde is istemek icin konustugum bir firinci yardim icin dekanlikla konusmami tavsiye etti. Deputy Dean Prof. Guney Devrez immediately gave
scholarship as he saw my terrible clothes and checked my grades
. Dekan Yardimcisi Prof. Guney Devrez notlarimi ve perisan elbiselerimi gorunce bana derhal burs verdi.

Deputy Dean Prof. Guney Devrez said Prof. Oral Sander is assigned to take me to shopping for cloths in Ulus by the monument but Prof. Sander never showed up for weeks so I had to do it by myself. Dekan yardimcisi Prof. Guney Devrez bana Prof. Oral Sander’in giysi almak icin beni Ulusa alisverise goturmek icin gorevlendirildigini soyledi ama Prof. Sander bizi haftalarca oyalayinca alisverisi ben tek basima yapmak zorunda kaldim.

I used to criticize Prof. Sander for writing Turkish history from American sources, not using local original Turkish archives, not knowing old Turkish! Prof. Sander’i
Turk tarihini Amerikan kayaklarindan yazdigi, yerli Turk arsivlerini kullanmadigi ve eski Turkce bilmedigi icin acikca yazili olarak elestiriyordum. He was already mad at me as l was one
of rare students in the college who learned English by myself and got this Scholarship for it.
Siyasalda kendi kendine ingilizce ogrenen ve bunun icin bu bursu hakeden nadir kisilerden oldugum icin zaten bana kizgindi.

Almost all other students in the international relations department were middle or high social class kids from special foreign language schools and naturally they were the ones who passed the special entrance exam to study in the international relations department . Uluslararasi Iliskiler bolumundeki hemen hemen tum diger ogrenciler yabanci dille ogrenim yapan ozel okullardan mezun orta veya ust sosyal sinifa mensup cocuklardi ve uluslararasi Iliskiler bolumunde okumak icin gereken ozel giris imtihanini boyle gecmislerdi. In the past this political translation exam was done at 3rd year but that year changed it to 2nd year. Gecmiste bu siyasi tercume sinavi 3cu sinifta yapiliyordu ama o yil 2ci sinifta yapildi. None of other departments had any entrance exam or precondition. Oteki bolumlerin hicbirinde boyle bir giris sinavi veya onsarti yoktu.

My classmates could not accept that someone with zero family support and no special school background is accepted in the class and can even do better than them. Herhangi bir ozel okuldan gelmeyen ve sifir aile destegi olan birisinin kendileriyle ayni sinifa girmesini ve hatta kendilerinden daha basarili olmasini kabullenemediler.

It was totally class conscious rejection and grudging nothing to do with my political background. Tamamen sinifsal bilincle ve kizginlikla yapilan bir dislama idi ve siyasal
gecmisimle ilgisi yoktu. For example as leftist dormitory roommate Ali Tekin in the Republic Dormitory , who was elected as member of parliament for Democratic Left Party from
Adana in 1999 and now Deputy Dean in Yasar University, continued his friendship until he left for USA and even came to see my room in the guesthouse of association of political sciences
grads.
Ornegin 1999 genel secimlerinde DSP’den Adana milletvekili secilen ve halen Yasar Universitesinde Dekan Yardimcisi olan Ali Tekin sol goruslu birisi olarak Amerikaya gidene kadar dostlugunu surdurmus ve hatta mulkiyeliler birligi misafirhanesinde kaldigim odayi gelip gormustur. http://ik.yasar.edu.tr/universite-kadromuz/akademik-kadromuz/fakulteler/iktisadi-ve-idari-bilimler-fakultesi/uluslararasi-iliskiler-bolumu/

Actually this reaction started in my first year when I was in the Republic Dormitory right behind the college. Gercekte bu tepki birinci siniftayken Cumhuriyet yurdunda basladi. As I tried to study English seriously one roommate from special Saint Benoit French high school reacted very negatively. Ben ciddi olarak Ingilizce ogrenmek icin ugrasirken ozel yabanci Saint Benoit Fransiz Lisesi mezunu bir oda arkadasi cok olumsuz tepki gosterdi. He was bragging so much with his privilage and so mad at me that I can achieve same foreign language skills by my own self-study! O ayricaligi ile cok fazla ovunuyor ve ayni yabanci dil yetenegini kendi basima calisarak kazanma fikrime ates puskuryordu. He constantly provoked other roommates against me by abusing his respectable status. O saygin statusunu istismar ederek oteki oda arkadaslarimi bana karsi surekli kiskirtiyordu. He ridiculed me by unexpected quizzes from my texts and constantly physically abused and even ejaculated on my bed while I was outside! Ders kitaplarindan ansizin sordugu ders sorulari ile beni kucuk dusurur ve beni surekli taciz eder ve hatta ben disarda iken yatagimin uzerine masturbasyon yapardi. This masturbation to my bed in my absence was horrible rape threat! Yoklugumda yatagima yapilan bu masturbasyon korkunc tecavuz tehdidi idi! Then he disappeared but when I was in the second year I saw him in the farmers market in Esat neighborhood. Sonra ortadan kayboldu fakat ikinci sinifta iken Esat semt pazarinda onu tekrar gordum. He was selling shopping bags! Pazar poseri satiyordu. He picked a fight and I broke his toot with a punch! Kavga baslatti ve bir yumrukla disini kirdim. So my self-important bragging privileged old roommate made me have a sweet taste of an unexpected revenge. Yani kendini begenmis ayricalikli oda arkadasim bana umulmadik intikam lezzeti yasatmisti. http://www.sb.k12.tr/spip.php?article2833

My father forced me to live with gray Wolfe students in Private Nigde Dormitory where I had to walk with gray wolfs to my college every day. Babam beni ulkuculere ait Ozel Nigde yurdunda kalmaya ve ulkuculerle beraber hergun Siyasal’a yurume gitmeye beni mecbur etti. My father made me a target for leftist group in my college and in State Republic dormitory which I transferred. Babam Siyasal’da ve daha sonra gectigim Resmi Cumhuriyet yurdunda beni solcularin hedefi yapti. Because of my father leftist students masturbated to my bed in my absence to threaten me with horrible rape in Republic dormitory as I mentioned above! Babamin yuzunden solcu ogrenciler beni tecavuzle korkutmak icin yukarda anlattigim gibi ben yokken yatagima masturbasyon yaptilar ve baskilar uyguladilar.

My father was so mean that he did not give me rent money to stay in a student house with other students from my home town Karasu in Kolej area and got me evicted and transferred to House of religious Nur students. Babam cok kotu idi ve Kolej semtinde Karasulu hemseri ogrencilerle kaldigim evde Kira parasini vermedigi icin evden atilmama ve nurcularin evine gecmeye beni mecbur etti. My father forced me to move there because nur religious house was free of charge and too much mind control which did not allow critical thinking. Babam beni buraya gecmeye zorladi cunku nurcularin evi ucretsizdi ve elestirel dusunceye izin verilmiyordu.

My friends Hamit Bektas and Ali Ozkan from Karasu high school rented a house in Topraklik area while they were going to test preparation course but my father forced me to be a political target as always. Karasu Lisesinden arkadaslarim Hamit Bektas ve Ali Ozkan universiteye hazirlik icin dersaneye giderken Topraklik semtinde bir ev kiralayip otururlarken babam her zaman oldugu gibi beni siyasi hedef haline getirdi.

In the meantime, Mehmet Ali gemuhluoglu and his brother Selman Gemuhluoglu were in my class for years in the college. Ayni zamanda Mehmet Ali Gemuhluoglu ve kardesi Selman Gemuhluoglu Siyasal’da uzun yillar benimle ayni siniftaydilar. They never had any money issues as their father Fethi Gemuhluoglu who was one of the leaders of nationalists collected monies from the oil giants as head of the Oil Foundation. . Babalari Turkiye’de milliyetcilerin liderlerinden olan Fethi Gemuhluoglu’nun Petrol Vakfi baskani olarak petrol devlerinden topladigi paralar sayesinde hicbir zaman para sikintisi cekmediler. Here: Burda:

http://www.ihvanforum.org/showthread.php?100563-Fethi-Gemuhluoğlu-kimdir

In third year, one weekend, Selman Gemuhluoglu invited me to drink beer with his friend who was a student in Russian language at Faculty of Languages, History and Geography of Ankara university. Ucuncu sinifta bir hafta sonu, Selman Gemuhluoglu Ankara Universitesi Dil Tarih ve Cografya Fakultesi’nde Rus Dili okuyan bir arkadasiyla birlikte beni bira icmeye cagirdi. Selman said we will race to drink fast and the loser will pay the bill and started the race. Selman ve arkadasi hizli bira icme yarismasi yapacagiz kaybeden hesabi odeyecek dediler ve yaris baslattilar. As l did not have money l drank fastest and they paid the bill. Benim param olmadigi icin ben cok hizli ictim ve parayi onlar odedi.

However they got bitter and hostile for money and picked a fight with me on the way coming home. Ancak para yuzunden ters ve dusmanca davranip donus yolunda bana vurmaya basladilar. I had to do my self defense and Selman’s eyeglasses were broken in the fight. Mesru mudafaami yapmak zorunda kaldim ve kavgada Selman’in gozlukleri kirildi.

In the morning, Selman’s elder brother Mehmet Ali came to the Republic dormitory where I lived and yelled at me to pay the cost for eyeglasses or else they will go to police! Sabahleyin Mehmet Ali kaldigim Cumhuriyet yurduna geldi ve gozluklerin parasini odemem icin bagirdi ve parayi vermezsem polise gitmekle tehdit etti. I replied “do whatever you can
do!”
“Elinden geleni yap” diye karsilik verdim.

Even though Gemuhluoglu brothers never had any money problem they attacked me for money in a nice beer party and then threatened me with a beating by police for money. Gemuhluoglu kardeslerin hicbir zaman para sorunlari olmadigi halde guzel bir bira eglencesinde para icin bana saldirdilar ve sonra da yine gozluk parasi icin beni polise dovdurmekle tehdit ettiler.

Same Mehmet Ali was caught cheating by Prof. Dogu Ergil in his exam in master’s class and got very bitter to me outside the class and assaulted to me but l stopped him by a kick
to his crouch for self defense.
Ayni Mehmet Ali master sinifinda kopya cekerken Prof. Dogu Ergil tarafindan yakalandi ve bana cok kizdigi icin kapi onunde vurmaya basladi fakat ben mesru mudafa icin bacak arasina bir tekme atarak onu durdurdum.

I never had any fight with any student inside my college other than Gemuhluoglu brothers! Gemuhluoglu kardesler disinda Siyasal’in icinde hicbir kavgam olmamistir. The only other fight with another leftist student who masturbated to my bed was in Esat farmers market far way from college. Oteki kavgam yatagima masturbasyon yapan sol goruslu siyasalli bir ogrenciyle okuldan cok uzak olan Esat semt pazarinda olmustur. In short I was attacked both by left and right all for social class reasons! Kisacasi sosyal sinif farki nedeniyle hem sagdan hem soldan saldiri ve baskilara maruz kaldim. This is my reality lasting my life time! Bu benim hayatim boyunca suren gercegimdir!

Mehmet Ali Gemuhluoglu was assigned as general secretary for Turkish Radio and Television (TRT) by the AKP government. Mehmet Ali Gemuhluoglu AKP iktidari
tarafindan TRT genel sekreteri yapilmistir. It is obvious that Mehmet Ali harvests his late fathers heritage. Aciktir ki Mehmet Ali olen babasinin siyasi mirasindan istifade ediyor. Here: Burda: http://www.dunyabizim.com/aType=haberYazdir&ArticleID=11196&tip=haber; http://www.kayseriehaber.com/fethi-gemuhluoglu-1-makale,1649.html

My father came to my college many times every year just to spy and harass me. Babam sadece beni taciz etmek ve gizlice izlemek icin her yil bircok kez Siyasal’a geldi. He returned right back after yelling at me. Bana kizip bagirdiktan sonra oylece geri dondu.
He ordered and made me to stay with fanatical religious cult people. Asiri dinci fanatiklerin evlerinde kalmami emretti. He wanted to control me by help of other cult people. Oteki tarikat mensuplarinin yardimiyla beni kontrol altinda tutmak istedi. My father was and is always a racist gray Wolfe who did not even pray until he was 50 but forced me to be a fanatical religious cult member! Babam herzaman irkci bir ulkucu olmustu ve 50 yasina kadar namaz da kilmamisti fakat beni bir fanatik tarikat mensubu yapmak istemisti. His main reason was to control my mind and kill my critical thinking nature! Babamin esas nedeni beynimi kontrol etmek ve elestirel dusunme kapasitemi yok etmekti. He especially loved it as it was free of charge too. Bedava oldugu icin de bunu ozellikle cok sevdi.

My father wanted me to get even more blacklisted. Boylece daha cok mimlenmemi istedi. He especially made me to stay with other fascist gray wolves in terrible Nigde private dormitory. Ozellikle berbat ozel Nigde yurdunda fasist ulkuculerle kalmaya beni mecbur etti. My father sent his fellow villager petty officer Davut Cengiz who was stationed in Ankara in those years in his uniform with his driver and body guard in his military vehicle to the Nigde dormitory and petty officer Davut Cengiz started yelling my name at the door as loud as possible. Babam koylumuz olan ve o yillarda Ankara’da gorevli bulunan Astsubay Bascavus Davut Cengiz’i kaldigim Nigde yurduna gonderdi ve Bascavus Davut Cengiz kapida durup avazi ciktigi kadar bagirarak beni kapiya cagirdi.

Everybody in the dormitory and in the college got scared and suspicious thinking that l work for the military and trying to snitch on students. Yurtta ve Siyasalda herkes benim
orduya calistigimi ve ogrencileri yakalamaya calisan satilik bir ajan oldugumu dusunup korktu. Here: Burda: http://www.kuyumculu.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1058&Itemid=118

I want you remember horrible military shootings, tortures, abuses, and blacklistings under the military regime! Askeri rejim altindaki adam vurmalari, iskenceleri, kotu muameleleri ve fislemeleri hatirlamanizi istiyorum.

Then he forced me leave a student house in Kolej area and to stay with leftist group in the same room in Repuclic Dormitory. Sonra beni Kolej semtinde kaldigim ogrenci evinden cikmaya ve Cumhuriyet yurdunda solcu grupla ayni odada kalmaya mecbur etti. My father made me political target again like in the high school! Babam beni lisedeki gibi yine siyasi hedef yapti!

My father sent our fellow villager and relative police sergeant Kemal Unal who used to
be assigned in Ankara, in his uniform to announce my name in the entrance in the Republic dormitory.
Babam yine koylumuz ve akrabamiz olan ve Ankara’da gorevli bulunan Baskomser Kemal Unal’i uniformasiyla kaldigim Cumhuriyet yurduna gonderdi ve giris bolumunde ismimi anons ettirdi. After military sergeant Davut Cengiz, police captain Kemal Unal showed up in in his uniform at my dormitories which inevitably forced everybody who suffer under the military regime to believe that l was an informer and must be dealt with appropriately ! Bascavus Davut Cengiz’den sonra baskomser Kemal Unal’in resmi uniformayla yurlarima gelip beni arayip gorusmeleri askeri rejimde baski goren herkesin kafasinda ajan oldugum ve uygun sekilde ugrasilmam gerektigi inancini yerlestirdi! After that I could not even speak with anybody as all groups target and mob on me! My father made me a perfect victim of mobbing from my birth wherever he could reach! Babam dogusumdan beri ulasabildigi her yerde beni mukemmel mobbing (taciz ) kurbani yapti! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mobbing

He made me blacklisted from all left, fascist and religious groups. Hem sol hem fasist hem de dinci gruplar tarafindan mimlenmemi sagladi. So he killed
my study and future chances by forcing me to be a mobbing victim .
Boylece beni mobbing kurbani olmaya zorlayarak okulumu ve istikbal sansimi oldurdu.

No surprise here. Sasilacak birsey yok. He was mad at me as he could not prevent my study. Okumami onleyemedigi icin bana cok kizgindi. He made me insane by starting the mobbing first and brainwashing me and my family against me all my life like “even if you become a governor you cannot be a man!” “Vali olsan bile adam
olamazsin” seklinde butun hayatim boyunca beynimi yikayarak ve mobbingi ilk baslatarak beni deli etti.

Like a god he determined my bad fate even before I was born. Tanri gibi ben daha dogmadan once kotu kaderimi tayin etmisti. That is what he repeated all my life as soon as he brought my step mother that even if I become governor he had condemned me to be nobody and that he will make sure I become nobody all his life! Yani vali bile olsam
beni “hickimse” olmaya mahkum ettigini, artik beni hep hickimse olarak kalmami saglayacagini uvey annemi getirdigi gunden beri butun hayatim boyunca tekrarladigi bu sozlerle ifade etti.

What kind of father repeats this insane story all his life to his son for mobbing? Hangi baba boyle manyak bir hikayeyi mobbing yapmak icin omur boyu ogluna anlatip durur? I used to cry and scream in my grandfather Osman Cavus’ household that I want school not new mother when l was five and six year-old as they told me my father will bring new mother! Babamin bana cici anne getirecegini soyledikleri zaman bes ve alti yaslarimda Osman Cavus dedemin evinde ben okul istiyorum cici anne degil diye aglayip feryatlarla protesto yapiyordum.

So l became a protester in very early age! Yani cok erken yasta bir protestocu oldum! They hated me and made me mobbing victim for my protest. Protestom icin benden nefret ettiler ve beni mobbing kurbani yaptilar. My father reacted to my screaming protests against his new mother oppression like “l want school not new mother” with his insane governor story which he never stopped telling me. Cici anne baskisina karsi “ben okul istiyorum cici anne degil” diye feryatlarla yaptigim protestolarima karsi babam hayatim boyunca hic usanmadan soyledigi bu manyak vali hikayesi ile cikti!

He means “ok so you want school to riot against my order but l will make sure you become a mobbing victim and it will be useless for you and you will be nobody because of your mother”! “Tamam evlat benim emrime isyan etmek icin okul istiyorsun ama ben de gerekeni yapacagim, seni mobbing kurbani yapacagim, okulun sana bir hayri olmayacak cunku sen annenden dolayi benim icin bir hicsin” demek istiyor.

When my father says you cannot be man he is actually announcing that he degraded me from position of real son to unwanted step son with my mother. Babam sen adam
olamazsin derken annemle birlikte beni de oz evlatliktan uvey evlatliga attigini acikliyor gercekte. My father announces that l cannot be his real son like he does not regard my mother as his real wife! Babam, annemi kendine nasil gercek bir es olarak kabul etmiyorsa benim de onun gercek evladi olamayacagimi ilan ediyor.

He had this mobbing practice from my mother! Bu mobbing pratigini annem uzerinde uygulamisti. Even if you can give birth to six healty children and be most harmless woman they make you a living dead zombi with their mobbing! Alti saglikli cocuk bile dogursan ve en zararsiz kadin bile olsan onlar mobbing yaparak seni yasayan bir olu zombi haline getirirler.

You can always be beaten and abused by misogynist family. Kadin dusmani fasist bir aile tarafindan daima dovulebilirsin ve ezilebilirsin. You can be forced to commit suicide to escape horrible abuses. Korkunc eziyetler den kurtulmak icin kendi canini kiymaya mecbur edilirsin. You can be tortured with electro shocks. Elektro soklarla iskence gorursun. You can be massively drugged to destroy your brain. Beynin yok olana kadar cok ilac yutmak zorunda kalirsin. Because of mobbing, you can be forced to live in a massive terror in unreal world all isolated from your children and world as insane devil person. Mobbing sonucu, deli seytan bir insanmis gibi cocuklarindan ve dunyadan tamamen tecrit edilip gercek disi bir dunyada muthis bir korku icinde yasamaya mecbur kalirsin.

And this misogynist Kuyumcullu village would just contribute to this mobbing.. Ve bu kadin dusmani Kuyumcullu koyu bu mobbinge destek verir. Perhaps all world system is so cruel. Belki butun dunyanin sistemi boyle vahsi. Totally so. Tamamen oyle.

This is totalitarian global fascist capitalist system. Bu totaliter kuresel fasist kapitalist sistemdir. We need to think about this and come together to build a humane world. Bu konuda dusunmemiz ve daha insancil bir dunya kurmak icin birlesmemiz
gerekir. Another world is possible. Baska bir dunya mumkundur.

I had a lawyer uncle living very close to my college. Siyasal’a cok yakin oturan avukat bir amcam vardi. His name is Resat Iskenderoğlu.
Adi Resat Iskenderoğlu’dur. I met and spoke with my uncle Resat like an hour or so in a pastry shop right across my college in my first semester. Resat amcamla ilk yil ilk donem Siyasal’in onundeki pastanede tanisip konustum.

He was so friendly. Akrabam cok candandi. My lawyer uncle seriously warned me against my father’s order to work while in the school. Avukat Resat amcam babamin okuldayken is bulup calisma emrine karsi beni ciddi sekilde uyardi. He advised me to study hard and learn excellent English. Cok calismami ve iyi ingilizce ogrenmemi
tavsiye etti.

I told him that my father ordered me to work in hotels for night shift. Amcama babamin otellerde gece vardiyasinda calismami emrettigini anlattim. He explained to me that every hour is precious not to be wasted in anything else other than my classes and foreign
languages.
Amcam her saatin cok kiymetli oldugunu ve bu nedenle dersler ve yabanci diller disinda harcanamayacagini bana acikladi.

He said if I work hard and learn languages he would help me overcome my past political
troubles
. Amcam eger derslerime cok calisirsam ve ingilizce ogrenirsem gecmis siyasi sorunlarimi asmama yardimci olacagini soyledi. My uncle told me that the Turkish
President Kenan Evren is his classmate from the military school.
Amcam Cumhurbaskani Evren’in askeri okuldan sinif arkadasi oldugunu soyledi. My uncle said he can get the President vouch for me and clear up all the past political troubles if I wanted to be diplomat.

Amcam eger diplomat olmak istersem Evren’e gidecegini ve Evren’in destegini alacagini ve gecmis siyasi sorunlarimi cozecegini soyledi. I made another big mistake and did not know how to
hide this meeting with my uncle Resat from my father.
Yine buyuk bir hata daha yaparak Resat amcamla yaptigim bu konusmayi babamdan gizlemeyi dusunmedim.

I told every detail to my father as he asked everything. Babama sordugu herseyi butun ayrintilari ile anlattim. Then he told me that my uncle Resat is super mean to his old wife and his visiting family members etc. Ondan sonra Resat amcamin hem eski karisina hem de ziyarete gelen aile fertlerine karsi cok kotu oldugunu anlatti.

My father also warned me that my uncle Resat is also a leftist so he would not help me. Babam Resat amcamin solcu oldugunu ve bu nedenle bana yardimci olmayacagini
anlatti. My father brainwashed me that uncle Resat was a mean leftist playing with my stupidity. Babam Resat amcamin benim aptal duygularimla oynayan cok kotu kalpli bir
solcu oldugunu soyleyerek beynimi yikadi.

Then my father ordered me not to see my uncle Resat again and always repeated his insane story and order. Daha sonra babam Resat amcami bir daha gormemi yasakladi ve manyak hikayesini ve emrini yillarca tekrar edip durdu. I was so young and stupid to trust my father and follow his insane order. Babama guvenecek ve onun manyak emrine uyacak kadar genc ve aptaldim.

Yes I never saw my golden hearted uncle Resat again almost 15 years.
Evet yaklasik 15 yil kadar altin kalpli Resat amcami bir daha aramadim. When I saw him once more he said he knows all about me from his family members in the village. Bir kere daha kendisini gordugum zaman bana koydeki aile yakinlarindan herseyi ogrendigini soyledi. He said he was upset I totally ignored him all those years. Bunca yildir aramadigim icin kustugunu soyledi. He said it was too late and now my troubles are 100 times bigger and his classmate Evren is not president anymore. Amcam artik cok gec kaldigimi ve simdi sorunlarimin 100 misli buyudugunu ve sinif arkadasi Evren’in artik Cumhurbaskani olmadigini soyledi.

Today I see it clearly how my father made me mobbing and blacklisting victim and burned me. Bugun babamin beni nasil mobbing ve mimleme kurbani yaptigini ve yaktigini cok acik sekilde goruyorum. The less control my father has on me the clearer my view gets! Babamin uzerindeki kontrolu ne kadar azalirsa gorusum o kadar daha netlik kazaniyor! When I was little child he had full control on my life and I had no idea what was going on. Ben cocukken hayatim uzerinde tam kontrole sahipti ve Ben ne oldugunu hic anlamiyordum. There was nothing to balance his total control as my mother was already destroyed. Annem zaten yok oldugu icin babamin mutlak kontrolunu dengeleyecek hicbirsey yoktu. My life experience with his unlimited destructive full control power can explain why l accepted his fascist gray wolf brain washing without question. Babamin sinirsiz yokedici mutlak kontrol gucunu tecrubeyle yasamis olmam babamin fasist ulkucu beyin yikamasini sorgusuz neden kabul ettigimi aciklayabilir. Abusive fascism was only reality I knew from my own experience. Istismarci fasizm kendi deneyimi den bildigim tek gercekti. Like every life form I had to adapt to my the super abusive fascist conditions that my father imposed on me to survive which would make any child become like me! Her canli gibi ben de hayatta kalmak icin her cocugu benim gibi yapacak olan babamin bana dayattigi istismarci fasist sartlara adapte oldum.

I graduated from international relations and began my masters in public administration but my father still tried to block my study. Uluslararasi iliskilerden mezun olup kamu
yonetiminde mastiri kazandim fakat babam yine beni engellemek icin ugrasti. He said bad stuff against my masters.Masterimi kotuleyici seyler soyledi. He said masters and doctorate are useless and there is no financial benefit in it. Master ve doktoranin
faydasiz oldugunu ve parasal bir yararinin olmadigini iddia etti. On the contrary, master, doctorate, better foreign language skills and first hand experience in different agencies are perfect advantage to get a better job. Tam tersine, master, doktora, daha iyi yabanci dil yetenekleri ve farkli kurumlarda ilk elden tecrube daha iyi bir ise girmek icin mukemmel avantajlardir. Because of these advantages I joined my diplomatic career extremely easily! Bu avantajlar sayesinde diplamatik kariyerime son derece kolay sekilde girdim.

My father also got some spy on me to separate me from my girlfriend as he always did. Babam her zaman yaptigi gibi beni kiz arkadasimdan ayirmak icin pesime casus takti.
He used to spy on me in the village or in the city if I am dating with a girl. Koyde veya sehirde bir kizla cikarsam bizi takibe alan babam benim kizla konusmami yasaklardi.

Sureyya Iskender’s mother told me to visit her daughter who was a student in the faculty of pharmacy in Ankara in her dormitory in case we might need help from each other in Ankara. Ankara’da Eczacilik Fakultesinde ogrenci olan Sureyya Iskender’in annesi birbirimize yardim edebilecegimizi soyleyip kaldigi yurtta ziyaret etmemi soyledi. My father spied on me while I was speaking with Sureyya’s mother and later questioned about this conversation on the Salikkaya road and my visits to Sureyya. Babam Sureyya’nin annesi ile Salikkaya yolundaki konusmami ve Sureyya’ya yaptigim ziyaretleri gizlice takip etti. Sureyya’s father was village headman and deceased years ago in a farm tractor accident. Sureyya’nin babasi koy muhtari idi ve yillar once bir traktor kazasinda olmustu.

My father questioned me about my conversation with Sureyya and her mother also ordered me not to speak or visit with any of them. Babam Sureyya ve annesi ile ne konustugumuzu sorguladi ve onlari ziyaret etmemi ve konusmami kesinlikle yasakladi.
My father told me Sureyya and her mother and uncles are leftist and ordered and brainwashed me to stay away from leftists. Babam Sureyya’nin, annesinin ve amcalarinin solcu oldugunu soyledi ve solculardan uzak durmam icin beynimi yikayip kesin emir verdi.

My father isolated me like this and left me in ankara as moniless, starving, miserable, abandoned, all alone! Babam beni boyle tecrit etti ve Ankara’da parasiz, ac, sefil, kimsesiz yapayalniz birakti. But my father did not mind that his second wife is from a leftist family! Fakat babam imam nikahli ikinci karisinin solcu bir aileden olmasina hic aldiris etmedi.

In this way, father prevented me to establish loving relationship leading to a marriage which would enable me to get decent resources from my family and stabilize my life to spend more time for my studies! Bu sekilde, babam evli statusu kazanarak ailemden ve cevreden yardim almami ve hayatimi duzene sokarak derslerim icin daha cok zaman ayirmami saglayacak bir evlilige gidecek olan sevgi dolu bir iliski gelistirmemi onledi. Basically he killed my skills to build good relationship and ruined my personal and social skills! ESA olarak babam benim iyi iliski kurma yetenegime oldurucu darbe atti, kisisel ve toplumsal yeneklerimi tahrip etti. It was a must that l was alone in order for my father to be successful in his mobbing campaign! Babamin mobbing kampanyasinda basarili olabilmesi icin benim hep yalniz olmam sartti. Such a marriage would kill the mobbing my father imposed on me. Boyle bir evlilik babamin bana uyguladigi mobbingi yokederdi.

My father brainwashed me to use women for money as soon as I started college. Siyasal’a baslar baslamaz babam kadinlari para icin kullanmami emredip beynimi yikadi. My father ordered me to stay away from poor girls and chase for rich women. Babam fakir kizlardan uzak durmami ve zengin kadinlari kovalamami emretti. My father did not also leave me any other way except chasing rich women to survive as he forced me to stay unmarried and starving! Babam beni evlendirmeyerek ve ac birakarak hayatta kalabilmek icin zengin kadinlari kovalamaktan baska bir care de birakmadi.

I met young British woman Andrea Bear in Sultanahmet Park in front of German Fountain in Istanbul as I passed second year in college. Ikinci sinifi gecince yaz tatilinde Istanbul’da Alman Cesmesinin onundeki Sultanahmet Parkinda genc Ingiliz kadini Andrea Bear ile tanistim. As we could not afford staying in Istanbul I took her back to my Kuyumcullu vilage. Istanbul’da kalacak paramiz olmadigi icin onu Kuyumcullu koyune goturdum. My elder sister Nezahat hosted us only one day and told me that my father is evicting us from the village immediately. Ablam Nezahat bizi sadece birgun misafir etti ve babamin bizi derhal koyden kovdugunu soyledi. I had to take Andrea back to Istanbul without any money. Andrea’yi geriye Istanbul’a parasiz goturmeye mecbur kaldim.

While walking away with Andrea to leave Kuyumcullu village I noticed my grandfather Osman Cavus was sitting in front of tea house in the village square and sat at his table with Andrea. Andrea ile beraber yuruyerek Kuyumcullu koyunden ayrilirken Osman Cavus dedemin koy meydanindaki kahvehanenin onunde oturdugunu farkettim ve Andrea ile beraber masasina oturdum. I introduced Andrea with my grandfather. Andrea ile dedemi tanistirdim.

This is my elder sister Nezahat who yelled to me that l bankrupted my father by taking his money! Bu parasini alip babami iflas ettirdin diye bana bagiran benim Nezahat ablam! This is how my father evicted me moneyless and hungry to force me befriend only rich women. Iste babam beni sadece zengin kadinlarla arkadaslik etmem icin boyle kovup, ac ve parasiz birakti.

Law student Tahir Iskender refused to give his key to his house in Istanbul. Hukuk ogrencisi Tahir Iskender Istanbul’daki evinin anahtarini vermeyi reddetti. So finally we got in Tahir’s house when his brother-in-law Omer Iskender was in the house. Nihayet Tahirin kayinbiraderi olan Omer Iskender’in evde oldugu bir zamanda eve girdik. However Omer Iskender did not give me house key and sent me out for something and he stayed at home with Andrea. However Omer Iskender bana evin anahtarini vermedi ve beni disari yalniz gonderip evde Andrea ile kaldi.

After a day Omer disappeared and locked out me with Andrea! Bir gun sonra Omer ortadan kayboldu ve beni Andrea ile disarda birakti. Andrea got even madder at me as I still spoke very nice about Omer.Ben hala bizi disari atan Omer hakkinda cok iyi konusunca Andrea iyice kizdi. Andrea said Omer raped her by using his power in the house after he sent me out and dumped me for that rape, moneylessness and evictions! Andrea, Omer’in gucunden yararlanarak kendisine evde kendisine tecavuz ettigini anlatti ve bu tecavuz, parasizlik ve evden atmalar yuzunden benden ayrildi. But later Andrea started her college and wrote a lot of letters and came to visit me when I was about to be fired and stayed in my official lodging in August 1989. Fakat Andrea okullar acilinca bana cok ask mektubu yazdi ve 1989 Agustos ayinda Disisleri’nden atilmak uzereyken bir bayan arkadasiyla beni ziyarete geldi ve lojmanimda misafir kaldi. Andrea said she is studying socialogy in the Open University with her friend. Andrea arkadasiyla birlikte Ingiltere’de Acik Universite’de sosyoloji okuduklarini soyledi. I received sexually transmitted disease from her and had to go to Foreign Ministry doctor who wanted to see my genitals for diagnosis and treatment. Kendisinden cinsel yolla bulasici hastalik kaptim ve Disisleri doktoruna gittim ki doktor teshis ve tedavi icin cinsel organima bakmak istedi.

Later on Omer admitted he had sex with Andrea but blamed it on her. Daha sonra Omer Andrea ile cinsel iliskiyi kabul etti ama sucu Andrea’ya atti. Omer also blamed me for his locking us out that a neighbor spied on us from his keyhole and saw me and Andrea in intimate position while he locked us out outside apartment door at the stairs well! Omer bizi kapida birakmasinin sucunu da benim ustume atti ve bir komsunun kapi deliginden bizi dikizledigini ve biz daire kapisinin onunde merdivenlerde beklerken Andrea ile beni mahrem durumda gordugunu soyledi.

However Omer was first to want to see my genitals in the Kuyumcullu beach. Ancak Omer bundan once bizzat kendi Kuyumcullu koyu plajinda cinsel organimi gormek istemisti. Because Omer’s provocation in the following say I showed it to everybody in the beach and he brought my shorts running to me in the sea. Omer’in provokasyonu sonucunda ertesi gun plajda herkesin icinde cirilciplak soyunup denize girdim ve Omer sortumu kosarak bana getirdi. https://mobile.twitter.com/oiskender; https://www.facebook.com/omeriskender/about ;http://omeriskender.blogspot.com/2010/07/sohbet-1.html; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Open_University

Omer somehow convinced me that he did nothing wrong to me or to Andrea and joined me for a hitch-hiking tour of Turkey. Omer hernasilsa bana ve Andrea’ya karsi kotu birsey yapmadigi seklinde beni ikna etti ve otostopla Turkiye turu yapmak icin bana katildi. We were arrested in Kusadasi for absolutely no reason and we stayed overnight in Kusadasi police station. Kusadasi’nda kesinlikle hicbir neden olmaksizin tutuklandik ve geceyi Kusadasi polis karakolunda gecirdik. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kuşadası

In the following day, Omer Iskender told me that he does not enjoy this tour and he tried to convince me to quit together but he never said anything that he will leave me alone or showed any convincing reason for this. Ertesi gun Omer Iskender bana bu geziden hoslanmadigini soyledi ve geziyi birlikte birakmak icin beni ikna etmeye calisti fakat hicbir zaman beni birakip ayrilacagini soylemedi veya bunun icin bir ikna edici bir neden gostermedi.

When I woke up with the sunshine in the morning somewhere around Kusadasi, I realized that Omer Iskender abandoned me and escaped without speaking with me and a goodbye to me! Kusadasi civarinda bir yerde sabah gunisigi ile uyaninca Omer Iskender’in benimle konusmadan ve hoscakal demeden beni birakip kactigini anladim. I really enjoyed my all-free hitch-hiking tour and repeated it many times to travel every part of Turkey. Otostopla tamamen parasiz gezmeyi cok sevdim ve bunu tekrar tekrar yaparak Turkiye’nin her yerini gezdim. I even hitch-hiked all free Eastern and South Eastern Turkey during my semester break in a dead winter! Cok kotu bir kis mevsiminde bile somestir tatilimde Dogu ve Guneydogu Turkiyeyi otostopla tamamen parasiz gezdim.

After semester break Omer Iskender came from Istanbul to Ankara to ask my help for his door to door survey job for Turkish Milliyet daily newspaper and I gave all the help he needed to finish his job in Ankara. Somestir tatilimden sonra Omer Iskender Milliyet gazetesi icin yaptigi anket calismasi icin Istanbul’dan Ankara’ya gelerek benden yardim istedi ve ben Omer’e Ankaradaki anket isini bitirmesi icin gereken her yardimi yaptim.

In my military service I sent Omer a few letters but never received any reply then I also tried to reached him a few times when he was in England but he never returned. Askerlik gorevimde Omer Iskender’e bir kac mektup yazdim ancak hic cevap alamadim, Omer Ingiltere’ye gittikten sonra da actigim telefonlar bosa gitti.

My brother Sezai Iskender told me in Denmark that Omer travelled to Denmark and spoke with him and Omer called me stupid. Kardesim Sezai Ben danimarka’dayken Omer’in Danimarka’ya gezmeye geldigini ve kendisi ile konustugunu ve benim icin aptal dedigini anlatti. I do not understand how my brother Sezai let Omer insult me like this without explanation and the why he passed it to me as my brother! Kardesim Sezai’nin Omer’in bir aciklama yapmadan bana aptal diye hakaret etmesine nasil musaade ettigini ve kardes olarak bu lafi bana nasil soktugunu hala anlamiyorum.

As always my father put spies to break my relationships with any girl. Babam, her zaman yaptigi gibi tum kiz arkadaslarimdan beni ayirmak icin pesime casus takti.
He tried with his all might to break my relationships from beginning to last day all my life. Ilk gunden son gune butun hayatim boyunca butun gucuyle iliskilerimi bozmaya
calisti. He was a total control freak fascist! Tam kontrol manyagi fasist idi!

My father’s first target was my angel hearted mother. Babamin ilk hedefi melek kalpli annemdi. He argued that my mother is super insane and ordered me
not to speak with her.
Annemin son derece deli oldugunu one surup annemle konusmamami emretti.

Then came aunt Zekiye who supported my mother. Sonra annemi destekleyen Zekiye teyze geldi. Of course her son uncle Ziya and grandsons Mujdat and Murat. Tabi, Zekiye teyzenin oglu Ziya amca ve torunlari Mujdat ve Murat. My father was a freak fascist mind dictator! Babam manyak fasist bir dusunce diktatoruydu!

Except for rigtists, of course. Tabi sagcilar haric. He banned me to speak wit professors in my college as they are mostly leftists except fascist capitalist Prof. Aydin Yalcin. Fasist capitalist Prof. Aydin Yalcin haric solcu olan diger tum hocalarla konusmami
yasakladi. Prof. Yalcin’s New Forum journal was a CIA organ. Prof. Yalcin’in Yeni Forum Dergisi bir CIA organiydi. Here: Burda: http://www.barikat-lar.de/barikat/birincibar/19/neredengeliyor.htm

He banned me to speak with foreign students in the college as he said “they are spies”. “Casustur onlar” diyerek Siyasal’daki yabanci ogrencilerle konusmami yasakladi.

He beat me up for any excuse picking on my hair and wear style or what l eat and drink. Sacimi ve kiligimi veya yedigimi ve ictigimi bahane eder her firsatta beni
doverdi. My father was violently against any matter about Kurds and minorities! Babam, Kurtler ve azinliklarla ilgili herturlu konuya siddetle karsiydi! This is total fascism controlled by my father and military coup d’état government. Bu, babamin ve cunta
hukumetinin kontrol ettigi tam fasizmdi.

Fourth year in college, Prof. Fusun Arsava was teaching European Economic
Community and in the end of her class she announced that Prof. Baskin Oran sought a voluntary student to help for the news in the Capital newspaper.
Siyasal son sinifta Prof. Fusun Arsava Avrupa Ekonomik Toplulugu dersini veriyordu ve ders bitince Prof. Baskin Oran’in Baskent Gazetesinde cikan haberlere yardimci olacak gonullu ogrenci aradigini duyurdu. I was the only one volunteering as Prof. Oran was fired from my college and banned to work as leftist by the military regime. Prof. Oran askeri cunta tarafindan solcu oldugu icin Siyasal’dan atilmis ve ders vermesi yasaklandigi icin benden baska kimse bu ise talip
olmamisti. I took the chances against the military regime! Askeri rejime karsi riski yuklenmistim.

I start working with Prof. Oran in Capital newspaper and helped for international news and published some translations with my name on them. Baskent Gazetesinde Prof. Oran ile calismaya basladim ve uluslararasi haberlere yardimci oldum ve imzamla birkac ceviri yazi yayinladim.

Then l met Eymir Bey in the Capital newspaper and he said he graduated from the same
international relations department and he liked my translations and offered me a translator/reporter position in his office in the news department at the Press and Publications General Directorate.
Ondan sonra Baskent Gazetesinde Eymir beyle tanistim ve bana kendisinin de ayni uluslararasi iliskilerden mezun oldugunu ve tercumelerimi begendigini soyledi ve Basin ve Yayin Genel Müdürlüğü Haber Dairesi’nde kendisinin yaninda tercuman/muhabir olarak calismami onerdi.

I went to the office of Head of News Department and passed his news translation test and started in the same evening. I worked in the second shift full time on payroll and had daily dinners , drop off van service and yellow press card. Tam gun uzerinden
aylikli olarak her gece yemek ve arac servisi ve sari basin karti alarak ise basladim.

https://eksisozluk.com/basin-yayin-ve-enformasyon-genel-mudurlugu–1099980?nr=true&rf=basin%20yayin%20ve%20enformasyon%20genel%20mudurlugu

One day I missed an exam given by Ambassador Semih Gunver who said he can give me a re-take chance if I bring him my doctor’s note. Birgun Buyukelci Semih Gunver’in yaptigi imtihana yetisemedim, eger kendisine Doktor raporu getirirsem bana bir sans
verecegini soyledi. That night while l work I start chatting with French translator Zerrin Ceylan sitting at her desk right across my desk. O aksam calisirken masamin tam karsisindaki masada oturan Fransizca tercumani Zerrin Ceylan ile laflamaya basladim. I just happened to tell her my problem. Kendisine sorunumu soylemis bulundum.

Zerrin Ceylan said her father is well known heart surgeon Prof. Ibrahim Ceylan and called her father right then and there and told me go to see his father at the Ankara University hospital first thing in the morning. Zerrin Ceylan, babasinin tannin is kalp cerrahi Prof. Ibrahim Ceylan oldugunu soyledi ve hemen orada masasindan babasini aradi ve sabah ilk is olarak Ankara Universitesi Hastanesine gidip babasini gormemi soyledi. Zerrin Ceylan is a very special
angel.
Zerrin Ceylan cok ozel bir melektir. http://www.dizgimedya.com/default.asp?part=kose&yazar=1&idyazi=317

Prof. Ibrahim Ceylan was so kind to me and gave me the doctor’s note immediately and sent me to Ambassador Semih Gunver. Prof. Ibrahim Ceylan bana karsi cok iyiydi
ve doktor raporunu aninda verip beni Buyukelci Semih Gunver’e yolladi. When ambassador Gunver saw the doctors note he was in shock and ask me about all the story. Buyukelci Gunver Doktor raporunu gorunce sok oldu ve butun hikayeyi anlatmami
istedi.

I passed Ambassador Guner’s exam easily then in the first class he asked if anybody has yellow press card then only I said yes I have it then he said let me see it and after he checked it he announced to class that he is writing to papers so many years but he still does not have a yellow press card! Buyukelci Gunver’in sinavini kolayca gectim ve sonraki ilk dersinde sinifta kimsede sari basin karti var mi diye sordu ve sadece ben “evet benim var” dedim ve sonra ver bakayim dedi ve baktiktan sonra sinifa donup yillardir gazetelerde yazi yazan bir Buyukelci olarak hala kendisinin bile bir sari basin karti olmadigini soyledi! http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semih_Günver

Ambassador Gunver acted as a friend to me and we used to go to the college library to look at some archives for him to write some articles and then he drive me to my work at the Press and Publication after class.. Buyukelci Gunver bana arkadas gibi davraniyor ve derslerden sonra arsivlere bakip makale yazmasi icin birlikte Siyasal kutuphanesine gidiyor ve oradan da arabasiyla beni calismakta oldugum Basin Yayin Genel Mudurlugune birakiyordu.

Ambassador Semih Gunver pushed me to join the Foreign Ministry during my last year and master study and became my first reference along with Prof. Mumtaz Soysal and Prof. Turkkaya Ataov in my application form. Buyukelci Semih Gunver son sinifta ve masterda beni Disisleri’ne girmek icin itekledi ve Disisleri basvuru formunda Prof. Mumtaz Soysal’in ve Pof.Turkaya Ataov’un uzerinde birinci referansim oldu.

Ambassador Semih Gunver even showed up during the exams in the Ministry and encouraged me by warmly speaking with me not to give up for the Ministry. Hatta Buyukelci Semih Gunver sinavlar sirasinda Disleri’ne geldi ve benle sicak bir sekilde konusarak beni Disisleri’nden vazgecmemem icin tesvik etti.

Ambassador Semih Gunver also showed up in the promotion party for the newest members of the career diplomat class at the Ankara Palace State Guesthouse where he chatted with me. Hatta Buyukelci Semih Gunver yeni baslayan meslek memurlugu mensuplari icin Ankara Palas Devlet Konukevinde duzenlenen geceye de katildi ve benimle konustu.

But when l was isolated and forced to leave the Ministry before my military service he was shockingly cold to me when I called him many times to seek his help. Fakat askerligimden once Disisleri’nden kopmam icin tecrit ve baski altina girdigim zaman yardimini istemek icin actigim bircok telefonda bana karsi sok edici derecede soguktu. As I became target of military regime Ambassador Gunver refused me totally! Ben askeri rejimin hedefi haline gelince Buyukelci Gunver beni tamamen reddetti!

As Ambassador Semih Gunver avoided giving me an appointment on the phone l went to Altay Group which I learned from his wife directly to see him after l was fired by the Gladio undersecretary Ozceri in 1989. Gladyo Mustesari Ozceri tarafindan 1989’da Disislerinden atilinca telefonda bana randevu vermeyen Semih Gunver’i gormek icin dogrudan danisman olarak calistigini esinden ogrendigim Altay Grubu’na gittim. Gunver was upset with my visit to his secret work place and said “diplomats do not make visits without appoitment” to me. Gunver gizli isyerini bulup kendini ziyaret etmeme kizdi ve bana “diplomatlar randevusuz ziyaret yapmazlar” dedi.

Therefore, Gunver proved that he regarded me as a stranger diplomat not as friend. Boylece Gunver beni artik bir dost gibi degil bir yabanci diplomat gibi gordugunu ispatlamis oldu. Our meeting was short and cold. Gorusmemiz kisa ve soguk gecti. But inside I noticed to my astonishment that my classmate Kaan Asena from my college was working there too. Fakat icerde beni cok sasirtan bir sekilde Siyasal’dan bizim siniftan Kaan Asena’yi gordum.

Kaan Asena was also in Prof. Baskin Oran’s house when I worked for Prof. Oran in Capital city Newspaper. Kaan Asena’yi Prof. Baskin Oran icin Baskent Gazetesinde calistigim gunlerde hocanin evinde de gormustum. Asena was complaining about his kleptomania disorder to Prof. Oran. Asena Prof. Oran’a kleptomanya rahatsizligindan sikayet ediyordu.

However Asena did not want to speak with me in the Altay Group. Ancak Asena Altay Grubu’nda benle konusmak istemedi. I never knew until today Altay group was a major arms dealer representing Lockhed Martin involved in major bribery scandal and Gunver could work for such scandalous company and my classmate Asena married with Altay’s founder
scandalous Nezih Dural’s daughter Yasemin.
Simdiye kadar Altay Grubu’nun cok buyuk rusvet skandalina karisan cok buyuk bir silah taciri oldugunu ve Gunver’in boylesine skandal bir firma icin calisabilecek karakterde birisi oldugunu ve sinif arkadasim Kaan Asena’nin Altay’in kurucusu skandallik Nezih Dural’in kizi Yasemin ile evlendigini bilmiyordum.

I also never knew that Suleyman Demirel worked for bloody arms dealer scandalous Altay group while he was representative of America Morrison company. Suleyman Demirel’in de Amerikan Morrison şirketinde calisirken kanli silah taciri skandallik Altay grubuna calistigini bilmiyordum. Because Gunver published a book to prove NATO hung Turkish Prime Minister Menderes and Gunver and Asena said Altay was a ready cement company. Cunku Gunver NATO’nun Basbakan Menderes’i astigini ispatlamak icin bir kitap yazmis ve Gunver ve Asena bana Altay’in bir hazir beton şirketi oldugunu soylemistiler. Gunver’s book and his articles in leftist Republic newspaper instantly make you believe that Gunver would never work for a NATO-accredited scandalous arms dealer Altay Group! Gunverin kitabi and solcu Cumhuriyet gazetesindeki makaleleri sizi hemen Gunver’in NATO onayli skaldallik silah taciri Altay Grubuna asla calismayacagina inandirir.

Actually Altay exhibits its deception when you see Altay claims ethics is its fundemental value since its inception in its web site! Aslinda Altay, web sitesinde kurulusundan beri durusluk ilkesini esas aldigini yazarak bu sahtekarligini sergiliyor! Here:
Burda: http://www.aktifhaber.com/kim-kimi-nerden-asti-291174h.htm;

http://medya7.blogspot.com/2010/09/tbmm-belgeleri-ile-bir-ucak-rusvet.html;

http://www.vefatilani.com/muazzez_artuz.jsp;

http://www.altay.com.tr/pages/443/428/f/tr-TR/Etik_ilkeler;

http://www.ankarascene.com/haber/kaan-asena-4276.html ;

http://sosyetegb.blogspot.com/2006/12/dural-ailesi-melih-murat-dural-hk.html

One day Semih Gunver’s son Counsel General Haydar Gunver came to our room in Coultural Relations Department and sat with us and questioned his father’s involvement in my life and how I was blacklisted and he reacted like “my father changed his direction acording to the wind, did not he?” after l told him my story. Bir gun Semih Gunver’in oglu Baskonsolos Haydar Gunver odamiza geldi ve bizimle oturup sohbet etti ve babasinin benim hayatimdaki rolunu ve nasil mimlendigimi sorup cevabimi dinledikten sonra “babam ruzgara gore yonunu degistirdi, degil mi? diyerek tepki verdi.

Actually Semih Gunver advised me not to rove against currents. Aslinda Semih Gunver bana akintiya karsi kurek cekmeme tavsiyesinde bulunmustu. Ambassador Semih Gunver pushed me in the Foreign Ministry and backstabbed me as soon as he realized I was blacklisted by the military regime. Buyukelci Semih Gunver Disisleri’ne girmem icin beni itekledi ve askeri rejim tarafindan fislenip mimlendigimi anlayinca derhal beni arkadan hancerledi.

Around the same time another Counsul General who was Suleyman Demirel’s Director of Private Office, sat in the same room after said it was unfair that they fired me so many times while they hired Hasan Fehmi Gunes’s son who was tried for armed robbery, for the Private Office of the Foreign Minister. Ayni zamanlarda baska bir Suleyman Demirel’in ozel Kalem mudurlugunu yapmis olan bir Baskonsolos yine calistigim ayni odama gelerek Hasan Fehmi Gunes’in devsol davasindan silahli soygunlara karisan oglunun Disisleri Bakani Ozel Kalem Müdürlüğü’nde calisirken benim bu kadar cok Bakanliktan atilmamin haksizlik oldugunu soyledi. I spoke with Hasan Fehmi Gunes’s son Kutlan Gunes for help but he was not interested. Hasan Fehmi Gunes’in oglu Kutlan gunes ile yardim istemek icin konustum ama hicbir sonuc alamadim. Here: Burda: https://eksisozluk.com/hasan-fehmi-gunes–338083

Another polished diplomat was Mehmet Ali Bayar who gave me a cold shoulder as I asked help from him. Parlatilan bir baska diplomat yardim istegime karsilik bana soguk davranan Mehmet Ali Bayar’dir. Here: Burda: https://eksisozluk.com/mehmet-ali-bayar–291491

Back to school time. Okul zamanina donelim.As summer
vacation came l passed the tests and started to work as news translator in the Anatolian News Agency in the day shift along with night shift at the General Directorate of Press and Publication where I started earlier.
Yaz tatilinde baslayinca Basin Yayin Genel Mudurlugu’nde daha once basladigim gece vardiyesinin yaninda Anadolu Ajansinda sinavlari gecerek gunduz vardiyasinde de calismaya basladim.

After a while the foreign news superviser Selim Atalay at the Anatolian News Agency terminated my translator position at the foreign news service without any reason
after abusing me by ordering me around as his personal servant like sending me to dry-clean his ties and singling me out to write my biography for him and forcing me to quit from my night translator job at the Press and Publication claiming it is illegal to work at two places.
Bir sure gecince Anadolu Ajansi Dis Haberler Sefi Selim Atalay beni ozel hizmetcisi gibi kullanip beni
kravatini kuru temizlemeye goturmeye, bir tek beni kendisine hitaben ozel bir otobiyografi yazmaya ve iki iste calismamin yasadisi oldugunu ileri surup Basin Yayin Genel Mudurlugundeki gece tercumanligindan beni istifa etmeye mecbur ettikten sonra hicbir sebep gostermeden dis
haberler servisindeki tercumanlik gorevime son verdi. Supervisor Atalay had also secret police followed me and told me he know my other translator job in the Press and Publication! Sef Atalay beni gizli polise de takip ettirdi ve Basin ve Yayin’daki oteki tercumanlik isimi de bildigini bana soyledi. Both General Directorate of Press and Publication and Official General Directorate of Anatolian News Agency general collaborated under military regime to terminate my both translator/correspondent jobs in the day and night shifts!

Selim Atalay was fascist agent of military regime then and today he is still fascist capitalist agent for Wall Street. Selim Atalay o zaman beni mimleyen askeri rejimin fasist bir ajaniydi ve bugun hala Wall Street’in fasist kapitalist ajanidir. Here:
Burda: http://haber.stargazete.com/yazar/kul-olasin-kerem-gibi-yana-yana/yazi-748729;

https://eksisozluk.com/selim-atalay–2085445;

http://www.ratemyprofessors.com/ShowRatings.jsp?tid=1252166

Prof. Hasan Koni said he seriously favored and supported Selim Atalay while he was spying on me for the Foreign Ministry. Prof. Hasan Koni, bana karsi Disisleri
icin ajanlik yaparken Selim Atalay’i ciddi olarak sevdigini ve destekledigini anlatmisti bana.

Judge Mehmet Akkaya showed me the secret archive about me sent by the Foreign Ministry. Mahkemede hakim Mehmet Akkaya Disisleri’nin yolladigi hakkimdaki gizli jurnalleri bana gosterdi. Judge Akkaya said secret archive is ordinary part of the court system and always used in my cases!. Hakim Akkaya gizli arsivin mahkeme sistminin olagan parcasi oldugunu ve benim davalarimda daima kullanildigini anlatti.
Here: Burda: http://www.antalyabim.adalet.gov.tr/hakimbim.html

When i saw Foreign Ministry reported false evaluations about my qualifications
l submitted my State Public Personnel Language Test result and my signed publishings.
Disisleri’nin beni tembel gosteren sicilleri gorunce Ingilizce KPDS testinden aldigim sonuc belgesini ve yayinladigim imzali yazilarimi dosyaya koyarak cevap verdim.

Due to military regime I was treated extra-judicial everywhere from translator job to career diplomat job! Askeri rejim yuzunden ben tercumanlik isimden diplomatik meslegime kadar her yerde hukukdisi ozel muameleye tabi tutuldum. I sought justice for decades within a non-existing law system like millions of victims. Olmayan hukuk Sistemi icinde milyonlarca kurban gibi yillarca bosuna hak aradim durdum.

Foreign Ministry sent secret reports from Prof. Hasan Koni and former Head of Town Kemal Baykal. Disisleri, Prof. Hasan Koni’nin benim hakkimda yazdigi jurnalleri oteki ajani eski kaymakam Kemal Baykal’in jurnalleriyle birlikte gizli kaydiyla mahkemeye yollamis.

I was in shock when l saw them. Ben bunlari gorunce sok oldum. Later on when l saw Prof. Hasan Koni by accident at Turkish American Association I told him “l saw your secret reports!” Sonra tesadufen Prof. Hasan Koni’yi Turk Amerikan Derneginde gorunce “jurnallerini aldim” dedim. Prof. Hasan Koni instantly knew very well what l was talking about and never even asked anything about my statement! Prof. Hasan Koni neden bahsettigimi cok iyi biliyordu ve ne dedigimi hic sormadi bile.

Of course I did not know then but in fact Prof. Koni was head of the Turkish American Association in those years. Ben o zaman bilmiyordum tabi meger Prof. Koni Turk Amerikan Dernegi’nin baskani imis o yillarda. When Prof. Koni started to scream to his security guards as “there is insane person here, save me, call cops” I had another shock and l run out of the building fast. Prof. Koni avazi ciktigi kadar guvenlik elemanlarina dogru “deli var burda, kurtarin beni, polis cagirin” diye bagirinca tekrar sok yasadim ve kendimi disariya zor attim.

Fascist Americanist Prof. Koni, giving lectures to torture specialist police and military officers in the military regime, used to dine and vine me a Galatasaray high school grads club in Izmir Avenue and walk with me to the Turkish American Association in Cinnah Avenue to get something from my mouth. Askeri rejimde iskence uzmani Polis ve askerlere yillarca ders veren Amerikanci fasist Prof. Koni agzimdan laf almak icin Izmir Caddesindeki Galatasaray Lisesi mezunlari lokalinde sanki bir dost gibi beni yedirip iciriyor ve Cinnah Caddesindeki Turk Amerikan Dernegine
kadar benimle beraber uzun yuruyusler yapiyordu.

He ridiculed military officers as dumb even though he proudly served to them all his life just because he worships military regime. Sadece askeri rejime taptigi icin omru
boyunca hizmet ettigi generallere aptal diyerek onlarla alay ediyordu. By ridiculing military regime Prof. Koni sought to build trust between us to extract some words from my mouth. Askeri regimi kucuk dusurerek aramizda guven yaratmak ve agzimdan laf almak istiyordu.

My meeting with Prof. Koni was in the national day celebration reception at the British Embassy Garden in june of 1988. Benim Prof. Koni ile tanismam 1988 yilinin Haziran ayinda Ingiliz Buyukelciligi’nin bahçesinde verilen milli gun kutlama resepsiyonunda oldu. I never met Prof. Koni before. Bundan once Prof. Koni’yi hic gormemistim. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Queen%27s_Official_Birthday

At the reception, l was with Prof. Yahya Sezai Tezel. Ben milli gun resepsiyonunda Prof. Yahya Sezai Tezel ile birlikteydim. Prof. Tezel taught us his economic
systems class and l really loved it and got very high mark.
Prof. Tezel bize Iktisadi Sistemler dersini verdi ve ben bu dersi cok sevdim ve cok yuksek not aldim. Prof. Tezel’s class in my second year was one of most feared but l loved his innovative ways in which he tackled with quantum physics theory against authoritarian logic and birth of ancient state from irrigation systems in the middle east area. Ikinci siniftayken aldigim Prof. Tezel’in dersi encok korkulan derslerden biriydi ama ben onun dikta mantigina karsi quantum fizik torisi ile karsi cikisini ve ilk devletin ortadoguda sulama kanallarindan dogdugu seklinde yenilikci yaklasimlarini cok sevdim.

I visited Prof. Tezel upon his invitation at his office as founder director of social sciences institute in the Middle East Technical University. Prof. Tezel’i daveti uzerine Ortadoguda Teknik Universitesi Sosyal Bilimler Enstitusu’nun kurucu Müdürü olarak makaminda ziyaret ettim. He gave me serious Engish books to read and treated me well where ever he saw me. Prof. Tezel bana ciddi okuma kitaplari verdi ve gordugu heryerde cok iyi davrandi.

However one day near the end of fourth year l saw his interview in right wing Tercuman newspaper and l typed a letter in my office at the Press and Publication and sent to him to
criticize him for giving interview to Tercuman newspaper not to Cumhuriyet newspaper.
Ancak son sinifin bitmesine dogru Prof. Tezel’in sagci Tercuman Gazetesinde verdigi roportaji gordum ve Basin Yayin Genel Mudurlugundeki buromda daktiloda yazdigim bir mektubu kendisine gondererek solcu Cumhuriyet gazetesi yerine sagci Tercuman Gazetesine roportaj verdigi icin kendisini elestirdim.

By sending this letter, I risked my established trust with him, my job at the Press and Publication and my scholarship from the Office of Dean. Bu mektubu gondererek onunla aramizda yerlesmis bulunan guveni, Basin Yayin’daki isimi ve Dekanlik’tan aldigim bursumu
tehlikeye atiyordum. Because of this l lost my scholarship for my master study! Bunun yuzunden master calismamda bu bursu kaybettim. I do not even know what other damages I got from this letter! Askeri rejimde bu mektuptan dolayi daha baska ne zararlar gordugumu bilmiyorum bile.

Deputy Dean Prof. Guney Devrez told me to speak with Prof. Tezel after he gave me my scholarship check. Dekan Yardimcisi Prof. Guney Devrez burs cekimi verdikten sonra Prof. Tezel ile konusmami istedi. Prof. Tezel was kind to me as usual and stressed the trust between us and told me he wished Cumhuriyet newspaper published this interview him instead. Prof. Tezel bana karsi her zamanki gibi davrandi ve aramizda olusan guveni vurguladiktan sonra keske Cumhuriyet gazetesi benle bu roportaji yapsaydi dedi. Here: Burda: http://www.yahyatezel.com/whoishe.php?page=1&l=en

So this Prof. Tezel introduced me to Prof. Hasan Koni who joined our conversation at the reception in the garden in a nice June night. Iste bu Prof. Tezel guzel bir Haziran gecesinde bahçedeki resepsiyonda konusmamiza katilan Prof. Hasan Koni ile beni tanistirdi.

At the reception Prof. Tezel teased Prof. Koni why he was not teaching in our college and
Prof. Koni reacted by saying he is teaching at the police and military academies and can get anybody assasinated in a fake car accident due to his relations with the military regime
.
Resepsiyonda Prof. Yahya Sezai Tezel Prof. Koni’ye neden Siyasal’da ders vermedigini sorup takilinca Prof. Koni de polis akademisi ve harp akademilerinde ders verdigini ve askeri rejimle olan iliskisi nedeniyle istedigi adami bir araba kazasi susu vererek yok edebilecegini soyleyip tepkisini gosterdi.

Later on l met Prof. Koni second time at the British Embassy when l was at the lunch invitation by British Ambassador Timothy Daunt. Prof. Koni’yi daha sonra yine Ingiliz
Buyukelcisi Timothy Daunt’un Safarette verdigi yemek davetinde gordum. Ambassador Daunt was teasing Prof. Koni by inviting him to lunch at the embassy and exhibiting Prof. Tezel’s book Economic History of Republican Era on our lunch table. Ambassador Daunt yemege davet ettigi Prof. Koni’ye Prof Yahya Tezel’in yazdigi Cumhuriyet Dönemi İktisat Tarihi kitabini yemek yedigimiz masanin ustunde sergileyerek dokunduruyordu.

Prof. Koni acts against this book tease with his logic that he would write easy journals on friends instead of wasting himself writing books like this and become unforgettable face on the tv screens with the gossips he picks from the Foreign ministry, the general staff and foreign embassies and get anybody assasinated in a fake car accident. Prof. Koni de bu kitap dokundurmasina karsi ben kendimi boyle kitap yazip harcayacagima mis gibi jurnaller yazip Disisleri ve genelkurmay ve elciliklerden kaptigim dedikodularla televizyonlarin unutulmaz simasi olurum ve de istedigim adami kaza susu verip temizlerim mantigi ile hareket ediyor.

This fits well to you Prof. Koni. Sana da bu yakisir Prof. Koni. Here: Burda: http://www.hayykitap.com/haber.php?haber_id=140&print=1
British Ambassador Daunt reminded Turkish Foreign Ministry that he is the real boss by seating Head of Political Planning Department Ümit Pamir, Undersecretary of American Embassy
Marc Grossman and Prof. Koni together with me while I was under massive pressure from the military regime.
Ingiliz Buyukelci Daunt, beni askeri rejimin bana acikca siddetli baski yaptigi bir zamanda Siyaset Planlama Dairesi Baskani Umit Pamir, American Buyukelciligi Mustesari Marc Grossman ve Prof. Koni ile ayni masada yemege alarak asil patronun kendisi oldugunu Turk Disisleri’ne hatirlatti.

Do not forget Turkey is a slave NATO country! Turkiye’nin NATO kolesi bir ulke oldugunu unutmayin! Ingiliz Buyukelci Daunt did all this knowingly as he saw my ID card in the elevator at the Ministry and learned my degradation from career diplomat class to administrative class. Ingiliz Buyukelci Daunt, Disisleri’nde asansorde benim yaka kartimi gorunce meslek memurlugu sinifindan idari memurluguna tenzili rutbe oldugumu ogrendigi icin butun bunlari bilerek yapiyordu.

Moreover my British diplomat colleague Julian who was second secretary at the British Embassy told me that his boss Ambassador Daunt wanted to send me to study in London with
scholarship if I wished so in my official lodging house in the following day after I was fired by the Gladio undersecretary Ozceri in August 1989
. Hatta Ingiliz Elciliginde Ikinci Katip olarak gorevli diplomat meslektasim Julian ben Gladyo Mustesari Ozceri tarafindan 1989 Agustos ayinda Disisleri’nden atildiktan sonraki gun beni lojmanimda ziyaret ederek patronu Ingiliz Buyukelcisi Daunt’un beni burslu okumak icin Londraya yollamak istedigini anlatti.

I declined this full scholarship offer from British embassy immediately saying “no thank you l will fight for justice.” Ingiliz Sefaretinden gelen bu tam bursu “hayir cok tesekkur ederim ben hakkim icin mucadele edecegim” diyerek aninda reddettim. l never wanted to owe anything to British Foreign Office. Asla Ingiliz Disisleri’ne borclu duruma dusmek istemedim. I was determined to fight for justice for my lifetime. Hayatim boyunca surecek bir hak mucadelesi yapmaya kararliydim.

My British diplomat colleague Julian downplayed democratic justice campaigns like my petition struggle in the ministry. Ingiliz diplomati meslektasim Julian Disisleri’ndeki dilekce mucadelem gibi Demokratik hak arama mucadelesinin ise yaramayacagini savundu. Julian stressed that l will suffer a lot with democratic justice campaigns like this petition
struggle which caused this termination.
Julian, atilmama sebep olan bu dilekce mucadelem gibi Demokratik hak arama mucadeleleri ile cok buyuk cile cekecegimi vurguladi.

Instead Julian tried to put me under British debt yoke to abort my democratic justice struggle. Julian bunun yerine demokratik hak arama mucadelemi bosa cikartmak icin
beni Ingiliz borcunun boyundurugu altina sokmak istedi. I am very glad I never saw any British diplomat since then. O zamandan beri hicbir Ingiliz diplomati gormedigim icin cok memnunum.

One of two spies who wrote secret reports against me in the secret file sent to the court by the foreign ministry was written by Prof. Koni as you already know and the other was written by former Head of Town Kemal Baykal. Disisleri’nin mahkemeye gizli kaydiyla
yolladigi dosyadaki iki jurnalden biri gordugunuz gibi Prof. Koni tarafindan digeri de eski kaymakam Kemal Baykal tarafindan yazilmisti.

Kemal Baykal of Giresun who was fired for speaking Kurdish in his office appears now a full racist as seen in his introduction in a racist book. Makaminda kurtce konusuyor diyerek kaymakamliktan atilan Giresunlu Kaymakam Kemal Baykal irkci bir kitaba yazdigi tanitim yazisindan gorulecegi uzere simdi tam irkci gorunuyor. Here: Burda:

http://www.bianet.org/biamag/insan-haklari/120784-kaymakam-kurtce-konusunca

; http://www.idefix.com/kitap/cepniler-mevlut-kaya/tanim.asp?sid=I4UC863ZW8T44YT8FDXF

Kemal Baykal is a perfect double agent. Kemal Baykal mukemmel ikili oynayan bir ajan. When l was working in the International Press Center in 1991 I was assigned to Press Center in Diyarbakir and wanted to visit former minister of public works uncle Recai Iskenderoğlu of our clan in Diyarbakir who was working as adviser in the Ekinciler Holding
Regional Directorate in Ankara.
Diyarbakirdaki Uluslarasi Basin Merkezi’nde gorevli giderken Ankara’da Ekinciler Holding Bolge Müdürlüğü’de danisman olarak calisan Diyarbakirli akrabamiz eski Bayindirlik bakani Recai Iskenderoğlu amcayi ziyarete gittim.

Uncle Recai introduced me to Regional Director Kemal Baykal and said Baykal is former head of town also graduated from my college. Recai amca beni Bolge Müdürü Kemal Baykal ile tanistirdi ve Baykal’in da Siyasal mezunu bir eski kaymakam oldugunu soyledi. While Kemal Baykal won my trust by speaking like “I am burned like you so l will fix your problem with my classmates in the Foreign Ministry” in reality he sold me out by writing secret reports against me to Foreign Ministry. Kaymakam Kemal Baykal “ben de senin gibi harcandim senin sikintini Disisleri’ndeki Siyasalli arkadaslarimla cozecegim” diye benim
guvenimi kazanirken meger gercekte jurnaller yazip beni satiyormus.

Strange thing about my secret political archives in my file is that l never heard any tip about this from other friends supposedly supporting me to get back to my career. Dosyamdaki gizli arsivlerle ilgili acayip bir durum sudur ki meslegime geri donmem icin sozde bana yardimci olan arkadaslarimin hicbirisinden boyle bir sey duymadim. I never heard from my so called friends that we live military regime and I am a victim of coup d’état. Benim sozde arkadaslarimdan bir askeri rejimde yasadigimizi ve benim darbenin kurbani oldugumu hic duymadim. Even though they knew how the system operated as they worked with files of blacklisted personnel all the time but kept me in dark. Surekli olarak mimli gorevlilerin dosyalariyla calisan bu arkadaslar sistemin nasil isledigini bildikleri halde beni karanlikta biraktilar. Even though they did not like my political background they still smiled to my face and acted like they supported my justice struggle but stabbed my back in reality. Siyasi gecmisimden hoslanmadiklari halde yuzume gulumsediler ve bana dostmus gibi davrandilar fakat gercekte beni arkadan bicakladilar. They are not only Prof. Koni and Head of Town Kemal Baykal. Bunlar Prof. Koni ve Kaymakam Kemal Baykal’dan ibaret degildir.

Council of State Prosecutor Metin Yuksel must certainly know my secret archive in the file. Danistay Savcisi Metin Yuksel dosyamdaki gizli dosyayi kesinlikle bilmesi gerekir. I met Metin Yuksel by chance as l went to see another Council of State Prosecutor Cavit Zeybek . Yine bir Danistay Savcisi olan Cavit Zeybek ile tanismaya gittigim zaman Metin Yuksel ile tanistim. Another judge referred me to Prosecutor Zeybek. Baska bir hakim beni Savci Zeybek’e havale etmisti. I met Prosecutor Metin Yuksel because he was sharing the same office room with Cavit Zeybek. Savci Metin Yuksel ile Savci Cavit Zeybek’in odasini paylastigi icin tanistim.

When l realized and told him that he was the Investigative Judge in my career diplomat case Metin Yuksel admitted it. Metin Yukselin benim Disisleri melek memurlugu davama bakan Danistay Tetkik hakimi oldugunun farkina vardim ve kendisine bunu soyledim o da davama baktigini teyit etti. I visited Metin Yuksel and Cavit Zeybek, who are prosecutors in the Council of State, so many times that he told me he liked gray wolves as they are the only ones fighting the Kurdish militants. Danistay 10.cu Daire Savcisi Metin Yuksel’i o kadar cok ziyaret ettim ki sonunda bana Kurt militanlara karsi sadece onlar mucadele ediyor diye ulkuculeri sevdigini anlatti.

I pressed him why he refused to meet me during my career diplomat case and did not write a truthful opinion that I was degraded after 5 months education instead of 12 months Metin Yuksel said he did not know it at that time. Neden benim Disisleri meslek memurlugu davam sirasinda benimle gorusmeyi hep reddettigini ve 12 egitim degil 5 aylik egitim sonucu meslekten atildigim seklinde gercekci bir gorus yazmadigini sorarak sikistirinca o zamanlar bunu bilmedigini soyledi. It is the main law the case was based on here we were talking about! Burda bahsettigimiz bu davanin dayandigi asil kanundur!

As you see judge Metin Yuksel destroyed my diplomatic career case in the court and defended himself he did not know my political background from my secret archive in my case file. Gordugunuz gibi hakim Metin Yuksel Disisleri meslek memurlugu davami mahvetti ve dava dosyamdaki gizli yazidaki siyasi gecmisimi hatirlamadigini anlatti. Here: Burda: http://www.istanbul.edu.tr/idarehukuku/belgeler/danistaykolluk.pdf ; http://www.kararara.com/danistay/9d/danistay7400.htm

Another fascist supposedly helping me but actually selling me in the Council of State is Ender Cetinkaya who was member of Fifth Department of the a Council of State. Danistayda guya bana yardim eden ama aslinda beni satan oteki fasist de Besinci Daire uyesi Ender Cetinkaya idi. Now l learned that Cetinkaya was appointed to Council of State by Coup d’état chief General Kenan Evren and was elected as Head of Couincil of State. Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ender_Çetinkaya; http://www.turkiyegazetesi.com.tr/Genel/a81323.aspx

Cetinkaya is from Adapazarlidir and also powerful member of Couincil of State appointed by the Coup d’état General Kenan Evren. Cetinkaya, hem Adapazarlidir hem de General Kenan Evren’in atadigi anli sanli Danistay uyesidir. For years Cetinkaya pretended to me he is helping me but never tipped me about my secret archive that he knows very well from my file in his office and from his past experience as personnel department in the State Railways General Directorate. Ender Cetinkaya yillarca bana yardim ediyormus gibi yapti ama kendi burosunda elinin altinda olan ve TCDD Personel Daire Bakanligindan gelen tecrubesi ile dava dosyamdaki gizli arsivleri cok iyi bildigi halde benden sakladi. Neither Ceinkaya gave me smallest tip about real reason behind my troubles nor he defended two-year training rule of the law covering my case! Cetinkaya ne dertlerimin asil nedeni olan gizli arsivimi bana fisildadi ne de davama hukmeden kanunun emrettigi iki yil egitimi savundu.

Head of Council of State Ender Cetinkaya sold me out to military regime like Council of State Prosecutor Metin Yuksel. Danistay Baskani fasist Ender Cetinkaya Danistay savcisi fasist Metin Yuksel gibi beni askeri rejime satti. Cetinkaya was military regime president general Evren’s apponted man in the council of state and naturally protected the regime by hiding blacklisting application crime of the regime! Cetinkaya askeri rejimin basindaki Cumhurbaskaninin Danistaya atadigi adamiydi ve dogal olarak rejimin fisleme uygulama sucunu gizleyerek rejimi korudu.

Another pretender, who hid my secret archive from me which is the real reason of my troubles, is Chief Prosecutor of Council of State Selami Selayir. Yardim ediyormus gibi yapan ve dertlerimin asil nedeni olan gizli arsivi benden gizleyen bir baskasi da Danistay Bassavcisi Selami Celayir’dir. Selami Celayir was pretending like a father congratulating me for my marriage as “you did the best thing” and sent me to High Court of Audit expert audit Fahri Aydin as “Fahri should help you, go to him” as Aydin who was original introducer and sent me to Celayir, became the Deputy General Director of State Fertilizer industries, instead of tipping me about my secret archive and enforcing two years training rule Selami Celayir, dosyamdaki gizli arsivi bana bildirmek ve 2 yillik egitim kuralini uygulamak yerine sanki babammis gibi rol kesiyor ve evlenmemle ilgili “en iyi seyi yaptin” diyerek beni tebrik ediyor ve beni kendisine yollayan ortak tanidigimiz Sayistay denetcisi Fahri Aydin Turkiye Gubre Sanayi genel Müdür yardimcisi olunca “Fahri sana yardimci olsun, ona git ” diyor. Selami Celayir spent his life supporting military regime as you can see from his speech at the funeral of Governor Mustafa Gonul in front of Interior Ministry and naturaly defends its practice by hiding it from me. Selami Celayir Icisleri Bakanligi’nin onunde Vali Mustafa Gonul’un cenazesinde yaptigi konusma yapmak icin secilmesinden de belli oldugu gibi butun omrunu askeri rejimi savunmak icin harcamistir ve dogal olarak onun uygulamasini benden gizleyerek savunuyor. While military regime discharged 32 governors in 1980 Selami Celayir and Mustafa Gonul got sweet posts in the high courts during military regime! Askeri rejim 1980 yilinda 32 valiyi meslekten attigi halde askeri rejim doneminde Vali Selami Celayir ve Vali Mustafa Gonul yuksek mahkemelerde kaymak gorevler yapmislardir. Here: Burda : http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selami_Celayir ; http://www.taraf.com.tr/haber/yuksek-yargiya-pasa-brifingi.htm ; http://www.icisleri.gov.tr/default.icisleri_2.aspx/flash/flash/12/05/default.icisleri_2.aspx?id=4825 ; http://www.cihan.com.tr/caption/Icisleri-Bakanligi-darbe-magduru-valilere-haklarini-vermeye-hazirlaniyor-Ozel–CHNzAwNjEyLzE=

Another main actor was Dr. Cahit Tutum from Adapazari who was assigned to the Advisory Assemby by the coup d’état generals. Diger buyuk aktor de cuntaci generallerin Danisma Meclisine tayin ettigi Adapazarli Dr. Cahit Tutum’dur. While military regime destroyed countless people it selected Dr.Tutum for its Assembly of Advisers. Askeri rejim sayisiz insani yok ederken Dr. Tutumu Danisma Meclisi icin secmistir. Dr. Tutum is the state personnel expert with all political connections to know my secret archives. Dr. Tutum, kendisinin siyasi iliskileri ile beraber gizli arsivimi bilmesi gereken devlet personel uzmanidir. But Dr. Tutum also hid blacklisting practice of the military regime from me while pretending he is helping me. Fakat Dr. Tutum da, bana yardim ediyormus gibi yaparken askeri rejimin fis uygulamasini benden gizledi. Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/TBMM_1981_Danışma_Meclisi

High Court of Auditors expert auditor Ozer Altan like other so-called supporters always hid my secret blacklisting archive in the case file which is real reason behind my troubles but abused my misery! Sayistay uzman denetcisi Ozer Altan diger sozde destekciler gibi dertlerimin arkasindaki asil neden olan dava dosyamdaki gizli arsivimi benden hep gizledi ve ezilmisligimi istismar etti.

Expert Auditor Ozer Altan was on police payroll while he studied in my college. Uzman denetci Altan Siyasal’da polisten maasli olarak okudu. Naturally it was Altan’s duty too to spy on students and blacklist them as all police officers do! Dogal olarak butun polislerin yaptigi gibi ogrencileri takip etmek ve fislemek onun da goreviydi! As he graduated from college he became captain at the private office of the general director of police as reward! Siyasal’dan mezun olunca mukafat olarak Emniyet genel mudurunun ozel kaleminde baskomser oldu. Blacklisting was his main specialty so he hid it from me intentionally. Mimleme Altanin asil isiydi bu yuzden bilerek benden bunu gizledi.

Auditor Altan was from my home town Adapazari and running an illegal blue jean sweat shop in a crappy block! Basdenetci Altan Adapazarli hemserimdi ve Ankara’da berbat bir kosede ufak bir yasadisi merdivenalti kot taslama fabrikasi isletiyordu. Altan drove me to his illegal sweatshop one day to my astonishment! Altan bir gun beni kacak merdivenalti kot taslama tesisine goturunce hayretler icinde kaldim. Ozer Altan is in the news that he was prosecuted for criminal activity in his duty. Here: Burda: http://www.tbmm.gov.tr/tutanaklar/TUTANAK/TBMM/d22/c059/b119/tbmm220591190195.pdf; http://www.tbmm.gov.tr/tutanaklar/TUTANAK/TBMM/d22/c061/b002/tbmm220610020092.pdf; http://www.tbmm.gov.tr/tutanaklar/TUTANAK/TBMM/d22/c061/tbmm22061002.pdf

Back to my work during my school. Okulum sirasindaki calismama donelim. As my father heard I worked as translator/corespondent in the Press and Publication at night and Anatolian News Agency at daytime during summer as I graduated my father came and appropriated all my savings in my bank account. Babam, benim Siyasal’dan mezun oldugum yaz mevsiminde geceleri Basin ve Yayin’da ve gunduzleri de resmi Anadolu Ajansi’nda tercuman/muhabir olarak calistigimi duyunca yanima gelip bankadaki butun tasarrufuma el koydu.

My father’s reason was that he needed my money to pay his farm workers picking hazelnuts. Babamin bahanesi, findik iscilerine odeme yapmak icin parama ihtiyaci varmis. My father comdemned me to starve as usual. Babam beni herzamanki gibi acliga mahkum etti. Because of my father’s robbery of my money I lost my home and had to live in locker room in an abandoned old swimming pool in a shanti town. Babamin parami soymasindan dolayi evimi kaybettim ve gecekondu mahallesinde terk edilmis eski bir yuzme havuzunun soyunma odasinda yasamak zorunda kaldim.

Meanwhile during my master study I wore the fur hat everywhere as typical Russian/Communist and Turkish national liberator costume gifted to me by Ali Tekin who had same fur hat for himself. Ali Tekin’in alip hediye ettigi kurk kalpagi tipik Rus/komunist ve kuvayi milliyeci sembolu olarak her yerde giydim. Ali Tekin did his doctorate in America and
became member of parliament and professor at Yasar University now.
Ali Tekin doktorasini Amerika’da yapti, milletvekili ve universite hocasi oldu.

When I was with my fur hat going to visit my Polish girlfriend Maria on a city bus one night Prof. Yalcin Kucuk saw me and teased me for my fur hat so we spoke and become acquainted first time on the city bus. Bir gece Gaziospanpasa semtinde oturan Polonyali bayan arkadasim Marya’yi ziyarete basimdaki kurk kalpakla giderken belediye otobusunde kalpagimi begenen Prof. Yalcin Kucuk bana takilinca ilk defa konusup tanistik. Here: Burda: http://www.nkfu.com/sembolleri-kalpak-gozluk-ve-kirmizi-kaskol-olan-profesor/

Prof. Kucuk stated in his so called Ergenekon Terror Organization trial that state is filming anybody who visits his house. Prof. Kucuk sozde Ergenekon Teror Orgutu davasinda evine ziyarete gelen herkesin devlet tarafindan filme alindigini soyledi. Therefore I am blacklisted for this too. Bu nedenle, bunun icin de mimlendim.Here: Burda:http://www.odatv.com/n.php?n=odatv-davasinda-surpriz-1306131200

During my semester break in my master studies I joined the Turkish Daily News (TDN) and worked as translator/reporter and wore my riot symbol fur hat everyday Master okurken subat tatilinde Ankara’da Turkish Daily News (TDN) Gazetesinde muhabir/tercuman olarak calismaya basladim ve hergun isyan sembolu olan kurk kalpagimi giydim.

When l was in TDN I visited Yalcin Kucuk in his house and made an intervew with him which was published following day. TDN gazetesinde iken Prof. Yalcin Kucuk’u
evinde ziyaret ederek onunla roportaj yaptim ve roportajim ertesi gun gazetede yayinlandi. People in the paper teased me that l made interview as soon as l walked in. Gazetedeki insanlar gelir gelmez roportaj yaptin diyerek takildilar.

TDN was in favor of deposed Primeminister Suleyman Demirel against then Ozal government. TDN, o zamanki Ozal Hukumeti’ne karsi devrik Basbakan Suleyman Demirel’i tutuyordu. This is why TDN liked my interview with Prof. Kucuk which stressed too much pressure and tortures on opposition like flying military helicopters on Prof. Kucuk’s house and harassing him by following him everywhere. Bu nedenle TDN gazetesi, Prof. Kucuk’un evinin uzerinde askeri helicopter ucurtmak ve her gittigi yerde onu takip ederek taciz etmek gibi muhalefet ustunde asiri baski ve iskence uygulandigini vurgulayan bu roportajimi sevdi.

Later on l visited Prof. Yalcin Kucuk in his house again. Daha sonra Prof.Yalcin
Kucuk’u tekrar evinde ziyaret ettim. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ushanka ; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yalçın_Küçük ; http://www.sehriadana.com/ali_tekin.php

In the meantime l had Polish girlfriend named Maria working in the Polish company Elektrim, which was a communist block country, building power plants in Turkey which should grab attention of the state. Ayni zamanda Turkiyedeki enerji santrallerini yapan o zamanlar komunist bloktaki Polonyali Elektrim firmasinda calisan Maria isimli polonyali bir bayan arkadasimin olmasi da devletin dikkatini cekmis olmali. http://arsiv.sabah.com.tr/1999/10/07/y43.html

After Selim Atalay put me out of my two jobs at Press Publication and
Anatolian Agency at once l started to work in the Economic Press Agency (EBA) as translator/reporter writing economic daily bulletins in English in Kumrular Sokak with Founder Yavuz Tolun and Editor Omer Faruk Gunel in 1986.
Selim Atalay beni ayni anda hem Basin Yayin’dan hem de Anadolu Ajansi’ndan atinca 1986 yilinda Kumrular Sokaktaki Ekonomik Basin Ajansi’nda (EBA) Kurucu Yavuz Tolun ve Yayin Müdürü Omer Faruk Gunel ile birlikte tercuman/muhabir olarak Ingilizce gunluk ekonomik bultenleri yazarak calismaya basladim. Here: Burda: http://www.ticarihayat.com.tr/haber.asp?id=21640; http://www.dunya.com/gazeteci-omer-faruk-gunel-vefat-etti-188145h.htm

I used to call Prof. Kucuk to chat from EBA. EBA’dan Prof. Kucuk’e telefonla arayip hal hatir soruyordum. One day some police came to EBA and took me to the police station and questioned me all day about my relationship with my Polish girlfriend Maria supposedly because another jealous Turkish woman neighbour reported our relationship is suspicious.Birgun birkac polis EBA’ya gelerek beni alip karakola goturduler ve kiskanc bir Turk kadininin Polonyali Maria ile olan arkadasligimizi kuskulu bulup sikayet etmesi nedeniyle butun gun boyunca Maria ve Ozen hanimla olan illskimle ilgili sorguya cekildim. I had relationship with two women living in the same building, one was widowed by a Jewish man and had lived in Italy and other as polish, was very suspicious for the state! Ayni binada oturan birisi bir yahudi ile evlenmis ve dul kalinca Italyada yasamis ve oteki Polonyali olan iki bayanla ayni anda iliskimin olmasi devlet tarafindan cok sakincali bulunmustu.

I met this Turkish woman Ozen who lived in Italy for years, pretending l am a foreigner but later on l revealed her the truth. Italyada uzun yillar yasayan bu Turk bayan Ozen ile bir yabanci gibi rol yaparak tanistim ancak sonradan kimligimi belli ettim. But as she sold her house and bought another house l lost her track. Fakat evini satip baska bir ev alinca izini kaybettim.

Then l met Polish Maria and as Maria moved to another house my former Turkish girl friend Ozen stopped me inside the hall and l was tangled in a intense situation with two women. Ondan sonra Polonyali Maria ile karsilastim ve baska bir eve tasininca burada yasayan izini kaybettigim Turk bayan arkadasim Ozen beni koridorda cevirdi ve parasiz bir ogrenci olarak iki kadinla yogun bir iliskinin icinde kaldim.

This is how l got in trouble with state and moreover the mafia boss Ram who was living in the building used to sit in his jeep with his son also started to harass me on Shady street for visiting my polish girlfriend Maria and Turkish Ozen. Iste boyle basim belaya girdi ve ayni binada yasayan mafya babasi Koc ogluyla beraber jipinin icinde oturarak yolumu kesip Ozen ile Maria’yi ziyaret ettigim icin beni surekli Golgeli sokakta taciz ediyordu. Do not forget police state always uses mafia for its dirty job like this so l ended up in police station interragotion soon. Polis devletinin mafyayi boyle pis isler icin kullandigini unutmayin iste bu sekilde kendimi karakoldaki sorguda buldum.

When I returned to the EBA in the following day EBA’s owner Yavuz Tolun told me that secret police ordered him to fire me. Ertesi gun sabahleyin EBA’ya calismaya gittigim
zaman patron Yavuz Tolun gizli polisin beni isten atmasi icin kendisine emir verdigini soyledi. So I lost my job again for the police state. Polis devleti beni yine isten attirmisti.

Same EBA Owner Yavuz Tolun hired me again around 1992 as l was fired again by the
Foreign Ministry and fired me again after a while saying the Foreign Ministry is very annoyed seing my name in the masthead and it banned my access to the Ministry weekly press briefings and
threatened him with cancellation of Diplomatic Briefing subscriptions which was his main source of income.
Ayni EBA patronu Yavus Tolun 1992 civarinda Disisleri’nden tekrar atilinca beni Diplomatik Briefing dergisinde calismak icin ise aldi fakat Disisleri’nin Briefing dergisinin kunyesinde ismimi gormekten cok rahatsiz oldugunu ve benim Bakanliktaki haftalik basin toplantilarina girmemin artik yasaklandigini ve kendisinin en buyuk gelir kaynagi olan Briefing dergisinin abonelerini kesmekle tehdit ettiklerini soyleyerek beni yeniden isten atti. Turkish Foreign Ministry was single biggest client of the diplomatic Briefing magazine. Disisleri Bakanligi Ingilizce diplomatik Briefing dergisinin en buyuk satin alicisiydi. So it’s owner Yavuz Tolun was totally dependent on the mercy of state. Yani patron tamamen Yavuz Tolun devletin insafina bagli birisiydi.

So next I joined Economic News Agency IKA owned by Ziya Tansu in 1986 and was fired after a short while by Owner Tansu as he accused me of despising him and his agency even though l never knew his brother was founder of fascist counter-guerrilla organization in Turkey and Cyprus and both brothers were very close friends of Alpaslan Turkes. Bundan sonra 1986’da Ziya Tansu’ya ait olan Iktisadi Haber Ajansina girdim ve ne Ziya Bey’in ve ne de Turkiyede ve Kibrista fasist kontrgerillayi kuran kardesi Ismail Tansu’nun Alpaslan Turkes’in has adami oldugunu hic bilmedigim halde “kendisini ve ajansini kucuk gordugum” seklinde tamamen uydurma bir gerekceyle Ziya Tansu tarafindan isten atildim. Fascist Ziya Tansu targeted me! Fasist Ziya Tansu beni mimledi! I think Tansu got the call about me from the state. Sanirim Tansu’ya devletten benim hakkimda bir telefon geldi.

Tansu brothers and Turkes were very close friends and all were CIA agents. Tansu kardesler ve Turkes cok yakin dosttular ve hepsi de CIA ajaniydilar.
Here: Burda: http://www.aksiyon.com.tr/aksiyon/haber-23896-34-turkes-tmtyi-benden-ogrendi-boynuma-sarildi.html; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Counter-Guerrilla

After l started working in the Foreign Ministry l saw Prof. Kucuk in our Grads Club sitting alone in his table in the garden and l started speaking with him but he seriously warned me that secret police must be already spying on me so l must be very careful. Disisleri’nde
calismaya basladiktan sonra 1987’de Prof. Yalcin Kucuk’u mulkiyeliler birligi bahsesinde yalniz basina otururken gordum ancak yanina gidince beni ciddi sekilde uyardi ve gizli polisin beni takip ettigini ve kendime dikkat etmemi istedi. Neither Prof. Yalcin Kucuk nor Prof. Baskn Oran warned me about secret blacklisting and how to deal with it! Ne Prof. Yalcin Kucuk ne de Prof. Baskin Oran beni fisleme hakkinda ve fislemeye karsi ne yapmam gerektigi konusunda beni uyarmadi. They benefitted from my volunteer journalism work but refrained training me how to deal with the results. Gonullu gazetecilik calismamdan yararlandilar fakat sonuclariyla basetme konusunda beni egitmekten kacindilar.

Journalist Uluc Gurkan actually tried to burn me totally by forcing me to steal diplomatic cables for him and never cared about me as he was the Acting Speaker of Parliamet when l asked support from him after I was fired. Uluc Gurkan gercekten Diplomatik kriptolari calmam icin beni sikistirdi ve ben Disisleri’nden atildiktan sonra kendisi TBMM baskan vekili olunca kendisine yaptigim yardim isteklerimi hic umursamadi bile.

The Foreign Ministry undersecretary was ambassador Nuzhet Kandemir as I entered in 1986 until I was degraded in 1989. Benim Disiserine girdigim 1986 yilinda sinif tenziline maruz kaldigim 1989 yilina kadar Disisleri Mustesari Buyukelci Nuzhet Kandemir’di.

Kandemir was undersecretary between 1986 and 1989 so he was undersecretary before my entrance and was sitting in his undersecretary chair while I was degraded from my
career diplomat down to administrative class in 1989.
Kandemir, 1986’dan 1989’ya kadar yani Ben Bakanliga girmeden once Mustesar oldu ve ben 1989’da meslek memurlugu sinifindan idari memur sinifina tenzil olurken mustesarlik makaminda oturuyordu. With Kandemir’s decision I lost my chance of becoming ambassador! Kandemirin karariyla buyukelci olma ihtimalim kalmamisti. This kind of degradation was seen first time in the Foreign Ministry. Disisleri’nde bu tur bir tenzil de ilk defa goruluyordu.

Kandemir was Freemason, fan of Suleyman Demirel, member of Bilderberg , Salonica donmeh and run to Suleyman Demirel to join the right wing justice party after he retired from the Ministry and served there many years. Kandemir Demirelci, mason, Bilderbergci Selanikli bir donme diplomatti ve Disisleri’nden emekli oldukten sonra demirelin yanina kosmus ve uzun yillar orada hizmet etmistir. Here: Burda: http://istanbul.indymedia.org/tr/news/2011/03/271800.php; http://www.trwikipedia.com/nuzhet-kandemir/

Therefore, the original main attack in my career diplomat job came from Kandemir and then Ozceri who was also assigned just after Kandemir by same right wing Motherland Party. Bu nedenle bana meslek memurlugumda ilk gelen darbe Kandemir’den ve hemen onun pesinden yine sagci Anavatan Partisinin atadigi mustesar Ozceri’den gelmistir.

Kandemir degraded me from the career diplomat class into administrative class illegally and and Ozceri also illegally fired me from the Minnistry. Kandemir ileride Buyukelci olmayayim diye beni yasalara aykiri olarak meslek memurlugu sinifindan cikarip idari memurluk sinifina atti, Ozceri de yine yasalara aykiri olarak Disisleri’nden atti. They were agents of general Evren’s coup d’états. Onlar general Evren’in yaptigi darbenin ajanlariydi.

The tv producer who made a 40 minutes movie and aired it at his right wing BTV, which belonged to Ozer and Tansu Ciller couple, stressed to me that he noticed that it was always right wing politicians and officials who targeted and destroyed me all the time. Ozer ve Tansu Ciller ciftine ait olan BTR kanalinda mucadelem uzerine 40 dakikalik bir film yapip 1998’de yayinlayan tv produktoru beni hep sagcilarin hedef alip harcamasinin dikkat cektigini vurguladi.

Actually they were masons, Bilderberg, both right-left donmehs and CIA agent coup d’états generals. Gercekten masonlar, bilderbergciler, hem sol hem sagdan donmeler, CIA ajani cuntacilar! Producer privately said even though Ciller got me fired during her government she is using my misery as propaganda film against leftist government now.
Produktor ozel olarak bana Cillerin kendi hukumeti zamaninda beni attirdigini ama simdi solcu hukumete karsi beni bir propaganda filmi olarak kullandigini soyledi.

Actually military regime is manipulating secret information about me according to
situation.
Aslinda askeri rejim hakkimdaki gizli bilgileri duruma gore manipule ediyor. If the Judge/bureaucrat is leftist they send a file like l am rightist if official is
rightist then they send file like l am leftist.
Eger davama bakan hakim/burokrat solcu ise beni sagci gibi gosteren bir dosya eger sagci ise beni solcu gibi gosteren bir dosya gonderiyor. Under military regime, every bureaucrat and judge is supposed to take part in the destruction of the targeted person. Askeri rejim altinda, her burokrat ve hakim mimlenen kisinin yok edilmesinde rol almak zorundaydi. Otherwise that dissenting bureaucrat or judge would be punished by the regime. Aksi halde bu aykiri hareket eden burokrat veya hakim rejim tarafindan cezalandirilir.

As illuminati divided the country into right and left they never lose anything with the secret files and lies in their hands. Illuminati ulkeyi sag ve sol diye boldugunden gizli dosyalarla ve yalanlarla asla birsey kaybetmiyorlar.

While I mentioned Prof. Kucuk l also must write about Halis Ulus Gurkan. Prof. Kucuk’ten bahsetmisken Halis Uluc Gurkan’dan da bahsetmem lazim. After I was
fired from EBA in 1986 I went to ANKA news agency and met with Its owner Muserref Hekimoglu and editor Uluc Gurkan.
1986 yilinda EBA’dan atildiktan sonra ANKA haber ajansina gittim ve patron Muserref Hekimoglu ve Uluc Gurkan ile tanistim. Here: Burda:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ANKA_news_agency; http://www.aksiyon.com.tr/aksiyon/haber-20579-34-uluc-gurkan-ceyrek-adamim.html

As Muserref Hekimoglu did not accept my request to work in a flexible hours with my master classes l did not have a job there but l kept visiting Gurkan and l spoke with him in our
walk from office after his work hours.
Muserref Hekimoglu master derslerimle birlikte esnek saatlerde calisma teklifimi kabul etmedigi icin ANKA’da calismadim ama Gurkan’i
ziyarete devam ettim ve isten sonra burosundan cikip yuruyerek konustuk.

Later on I visited Gurkan a few times as he transferred to Sabah Newspaper with astronomical payment but in each visit he pressured me to bring him secret diplomatic cables
from my office in the Ministry which might put me in prison for lifetime in Turkish state security court .
Daha sonra Gurkan astronomik ucretle Sabah Gazetesine transfer olunca
onu birkac kere ziyaret ettim fakat her ziyaretimde bana baski yaparak meslek memuru olarak calistigim Disisleri’nden Devlet Guvenlik Mahkemesi’nde beni omur boyu hapse sokabilecek gizli
kriptolari kendisine getirmemi istedi.

While Prof. Kucuk showed real solidarity by warning me against secret police Uluc Gurkan pushed me to the hell of secret police. Prof. Kucuk beni gizli polise karsi uyarip gercek dayanisma ornegi verirken Uluc Gurkan beni gizli polisin cehennemine itikliyordu.

After l was fired from the Foreign Ministry I visited Uluc Gurkan in his newspaper again to ask for his support he kept me alone all day in his office and totally ignored my request for solidarity. Ben Disisleri’nden atilinca herhangi bir yardim almak icin Uluc Gurkan’i yine gazetesinde ziyaret ettim ancak beni butun gun odasinda yalniz bekletti ve yardim taleplerimi tamamen gormezden geldi.

Uluc Gurkan and his best buddy politician Hasan Celal Guzel together caused Hande
Sevkat Mumcu to be fired from her career and tried in the State Security Court (SSC) in the diplomatic cable scandal and killed in a car crash in her young age.
Uluc Gurkan ve cok yakin arkadasi Hasan Celal Guzel bIrlikte Disisleri memuresi Hande Sevkat Mumcu’nun kripto skandalinda mesleginden atilmasina ve Devlet Guvenli Mahkemesi’nde (DGM) 15 yildan yargilanmasina ve genc yasinda bir araba kazasinda olmesine neden oldular.
Here: Burda: https://eksisozluk.com/hande-mumcu–487279

l also visited Hasan Celal Guzel to unite our fight against Gladio undersecretary Ozceri but he yelled and kicked me out of his room for speaking truth to Tan newspaper. Gladyo
mustesari Ozceriye karsi kavgamizda birlesmek icin Hasan Celal Guzel’i de ziyaret ettim fakat bana Tan Gazetesine gercegi soyledigim icin bagirip kovdu.

Both Gurkan and Guzel did not want me to be witness in the SSC to say how Uluc Gurkan
pressured me to get diplomatic cables like both of them did same on Hande Mumcu and prevented me to support Hande.
Hem Gurkan hem de Guzel Hande’ye yaptiklari gibi Gurkanin benden kripto almak icin nasil baski yaptigin DGM’de benim tanik olarak anlatarak Hande Mumcuya destek vermemi istemediler.

Uluc Gurkan assigned Emel Armutcu in Istanbul to yell at me in Ankara in his Sun newspaper but still l defended oppressed public employees’ rights like myself and Hande Sevkat
Mumcu against the oppressors like undersecretary Tugay Ozceri and SSC oppression in the published interview.
Gurkan Gunes gazetesindeki Istanbul muhabiri Emel Armutcuyu Istanbuldan Ankaraya bana bagirmak icin gorevlendirdi ama ben yayinlanan roportajimda kendim ve Hande gibi ezilen kamu calisanlarinin haklarini Mustesar Tugay Ozceriye ve DGM zulmune karsi savundum.

While Uluc Gurkan preached justice all his life he never wrote anything about his boss Dinc Bilgin. Uluc Gurkan butun hayati boyunca adaletten bahsederken Sabah gazetesindeki soyguncu patronu Dinc Bilgin hakkinda hic yazi yazmadi. http://www.nihat-genc.com/nihatgenc/forum/12-nihat-gencle-yaplan-soeylesiler/197-nihat-genc-hrsz-ve-eskiya-yuvas-merkez-sag

Uluc Gurkan also served to 28 February military coup by passing their laws instead of resigning totally. Uluc Gurkan 28 Subat darbesinde tamamen istifa etmek yerine
darbenin yasasini meclisten gecirerek darbeye hizmet etmistir.

Uluc Gurkan pretends he is big anti-racist but he proves he is very racist himself as he claims the acquittal of Malta courts by the British is enough reason to reject Armenian
Genocide claims in his book.
Uluc Gurkan buyuk bir irkcilik karsiti imis gibi yaziyor ama soykirim konusundaki kitabinda Malta mahkemelerinde ingilizler tarafindan verilen aklama kararinin Ermeni soykirim iddialarini redetmek icin yeterli oldugunu one surerek kendisinin nasil bir irkci oldugunu ispatliyor.

Golden rule is universal evidence. Altin kural evrensel gecerliligi olan delildir. You should consider if there is evidence not a court decision. Mahkeme kararinin olmasina degil delile bakacaksin. Court decision does not prove anything. Mahkeme hicbirsey ispatlamaz. Court was and is a theater now too. Mahkeme bir tiyatroydu ve simdi de oyledir.

Evidence is the most important and above anything. Onemli olan delildir ve delil herseyin ustundedir. If Armenians have evidence we have to look at them because golden rule orders us to do so. Eger Emenilerin bir delili varsa buna bakmak zorundayiz cunku altin kural bize bunu emreder. Golden rule is peace at home peace in the world. Altin kural yurtta baris dunyada baristir. We cannot have peace without justice. Adalet olmadan baris olmaz. No justice no peace! Adalet yoksa baris ta yoktur!

However Uluc Gurkan brags about his poweful ancestor in the state which plundered Armenian and other minority wealth. Ancak Uluc Gurkan Ermeni ve oteki azinlik servetini
yagmalayan devlet icinde guclu atalari ile ovunuyor. I wonder why Uluc Gurkan is so silent about the issue of opening the archives of Amenian wealth. Acaba Uluc Gurkan Ermeni mal kayitlarinin acilmasi konusunda neden suspus?

Gurkan is very proud that he took revenge when chief of general staff saluted him as president for his pains from his blacklisted status in his military service. Gurkan askerligini yaparken fislenmesinin intikaini meclis baskan vekili olarak genel kurmay baskaninin onunde yuruyerek almakla ovunuyor.

But in fact Gurkan rose in the state by supporting state oppression and never fought to compensate all victims of all coup d’états! Fakat aslinda Gurkan devlet zulmunu destekledigi icin devlet icinde yukselmistir ve hicbir zaman butun darbelerin butun magdurlarinin tazmin edilmesi icin hic mucadele etmemistir! Gurkan brags he compensated himself. Gurkan kendini tazmin ettigi icin ovunuyor. Here: Burda:

http://www.aksiyon.com.tr/aksiyon/haber-31047-215-her-donemde-kullanilan-gazeteciler-var.html;

http://www.aksiyon.com.tr/aksiyon/haber-20579-34-uluc-gurkan-ceyrek-adamim.html;

http://www.duzceyerelhaber.com/Taner-AKCAM/18612-Defterler-nerede

Because Ambassador Semih Gunver, Prof. Mumtaz Soysal and Prof. Turkaya Ataov convinced, pushed and vouched me during my master in my college to enter into the Foreign Ministry as career diplomat I passed it in my first attempt in 1986. Siyasalda master
yaparken Buyukelci Semih Gunver, Prof. Mumtaz Soysal ve Prof. Turkaya Ataov bana Disisleri meslek memurluguna girmem icin beni ikna ettiler, girmem icin iteklediler ve referans olunca
1986’da Disisleri meslek memurluguna ilk sinavda girdim.

I did not really think to join the diplomatic career otherwise I would take the exam as soon as I graduated. Disisleri’ne Diplomatik meslek memurluguna girmeyi dusunmuyordum yoksa mezun olur olmaz ilk sinava girerdim. If we had post graduate program in my field of international relations when I graduated l would join this program and work in the press and l would never join the corrupt Foreign Minisry. Eger mezun oldugum zaman uluslararasi Iliskiler alaninda yuksek lisans programi olsaydi ben buraya girer ve basinda calisir asla yoz Disisleri Bakanligi’na girmezdim. Here: Burda: http://www.butundunya.com/pdfs/2009/04/062-068.pdf

Ambassador Gunver, Prof. Soysal and Prof. Ataove also became my references in my entrance application form to the Foreign Ministry. Buyukelci Gunver, Prof. Soysal ve Prof. Ataov Disisleri’ne giris basvurusu formunda benim referansim oldular. They all wanted me to write their names in the form. Benim forma kendi isimlerini referans olarak yazmami istediler.

While Ambassador Semih Gunver served to bloody war-mongering corrupt arms dealer Altay group, Prof. Turkaya Ataov made pseudo science under the command of the 1980 military coup d’état generals as a trusted man in his own words and demanded a scientist to be fired for publishing a book against his official opinion . Buyukelci Semih Gunver kanli, savas kiskirticisi, yoz, silah taciri Altay Grubu’na hizmet ederken, Prof. Turkkaya Ataov kendi ifadesine gore 1980 askeri darbesini yapan generallerin emrinde guvenilen adam olarak halen sozde bilim yapiyor ve kendi resmi gorusune karsi bir kitap yayinlayan bir bilimcinin bu kitap icin isinden atilmasini talep ediyor.Here: Burda: http://www.turkishnews.com/tr/content/2009/04/15/soykirimin-kaynagi-irkciliktir-ve-bu-turklerde-yoktur/

Prof. Mumtaz Soysal became Minister of Foreign Affairs for four months but he just ignored my situation as a famous professor of constitution and human rights who pushed me to enter the Foreign Ministry. Prof. Mumtaz Soysal da unlu bir anayasa ve insan haklari hukukcusu olarak dort ay sureyle Disisleri Bakanligi yapmis ancak girmem icin beni itekledigi bakanlikta durumumu gormezden gelmistir. While I was breaking world record as victim this did not even matter a bit for our human rights champion professor! Ben magduriyette dunya rekoru kirarken insan haklari sampiyonu hocamizin umurunda olmamis bile. Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mümtaz_Soysal

Another champion of law is Prof. Huseyin Pazarci who verbally encouraged me in the college but slaughtered the law just to fire me from the Foreign Ministry. Oteki hukuk sampiyonu Siyasal’da beni Disisleri’ne girmem icin tesvik eden ancak Disisleri’nden beni atabilmek icin hukugu katleden adam Huseyin Pazarci’dir. Prof. Pazarci was Head of Legal Advisory Department of the Foreign Ministry for 8 years from 1989 till 1997. Prof. Pazarci 1989 yilindan 1997 yilina kadar 8 yil Disisleri Bakanligi’nda Hukuk Musavirligi Dairesi’nin Baskanligini yapmistir. Pazarci has to pay for the slaughter of law sooner or later. Pazarci hukuk katliaminin hesabini odemek zorunda. He served to military coup d’état not to the justice. Kendisi adalete degil askeri darbeye hizmet etti. Word meaning of Pazarci is stallholder and he practiced stallholder law as subset of coup d’état law ! Pazarci kelimesi pazar yeri esnafi demektir ve kendisi cunta hukukunun bir alt konusu olan pazarci hukugunu uygulamistir. Pazarci became a deputy from the Republican People’s Party which is the party of state in NATO under the control of imperialism. Pazarci emperyalizmin vesayeti altindaki NATO uyesi devletin partisi olan CHP milletvekili olmustur.
Here: Burda: http://www.uludagsozluk.com/k/hüseyin-pazarcı/

I passed first written and then oral exam. Once yazili sinavi ve sonra sozlu siavi
gectim. In the written exam l strongly criticized soviet communism in
order to curtain my relationship with leftists in the college.
Siyasalda solcularla olan iliskilerimi perdelemek icin Disisleri yazili sinavinda sovyet komunizmini siddetle elestirdim.

While walking out of the oral exam room a stange guy saluted me warmly just at the examination door and started to speak wth me like he is my best friend Sozlu sinavi oldugum odadan cikarken acayip bir adam beni sicak bir sekilde selamladi ve sanki candan bir arkadasimmis gibi benle konusmaya basladi. He was strange because he was over the age limit to be an exminee and his body language gave me the feeling he was checking on me and then l never saw him again. Adam acayipti cunku yasca sinav yasinin uzerindeydi ve vucut dili beni kontrol ediyor gibiydi ve ondan sonra onu hic gormedim. He was questioning how
l made in the oral exam.
Sozlu sinavimin nasil gectigini sorusturuyordu. Secret police is famous to extract a statement from your mouth to destroy your career. Gizli polis agizdan laf alip insanin meslegini mahvetmekte meshurdur.

Secret police used mainly Ambasador Erdogan Sanalan and Edogan Aytun to force me to leave my career by isolating me in an empty room without anything to do and pressuring me to leave by false propaganda like “you are too good for this boring bureaucracy, you should go to excitingly lucrative holdings or academic career “. Gizli polis beni bir odada butun gun issiz bos olarak tecrit ederek ve “sen bu sikici burokrasi icin cok iyisin, senin heyecan uyandiran yuksek maaslar veren holdinlere veya akademik kariyere gitmen lazim” seklinde yalan propagadayla beni meslegimden kopartip surundurmek icin esas olarak Genel Müdür Erdogan Sanalan and Genel Müdür Yardimcisi Erdogan Aytun’u ve oglu baskatip olan bir bayani kullandi.

This pressure torture continued until l left for mandatory military service with permission. Bu baski iskencesi mecburi hizmet olarak izin alip askere gidene kadar surdu. After l returned from military they hypnotized me with high power position to trap me in the illegal training exam. Askerden dondukten sonra yasadisi hizmetici egitim sinavlarinda tuzaga dusurebilmek icin beni havasi yuksek gorevle hipnotize ettiler. Foreign a ministry shifted its tactic from brainwashing me to leave for exciting private sector or academic careers to trapping me by building false trust in me. Disisleri Bakanligi taktigini beni heyecanli ozel sector veya akademik kariyerler icin ayrilmaya tesvik etmekten icimde sahte bir guven yaratarak beni kapana dusurme yonunde degistirdi. They continued to build this false trust and promised me to give my lawful education right until they degraded my class from career diplomat down to administrative. Bu sahte guveni olusturmaya devam ettiler ve sinifimi meslek memurlugundan idari memurlugu indirene kadar yasal hizmet ici egitim hakkimi vermeye soz verdiler.

Then they degraded me to force to leave the Ministry but on the contrary l started to
resist with petitions then they fired and never ended hostilities till now.
Sonra beni Disislerini birakmaya zorlamak icin bana sinif tenzili yaptilar fakat ben tersine dilekcelerle direnip hakkimi aramaya baslayinca beni isten attilar ve bugune kadar dusmanliklarini hic kesmediler.

Besides fomenting the maddening and destruction of my mother, State’s hostility started in 1979 by expelling me from high school and sentencing me for six months for using my freedom of expression. Bana karsi Devletin dusmanligi annemin delirtilip yokedilmesini tesvik ettikten sonra 1979 yilinda ifade ozgurlugumu kullandigim icin beni Karasu Lisesinden surup 6 ay hapse mahkum etmesiyle basladi.

State fomented mobbing on me during my college education from my entrance in 1980. Devlet 1980 yilinda girdigim Siyasaldaki ogrenimim boyunca bana mobbing yapilmasini tesvik etti. State continued its assault on me by rejecting to give me my passport in 1984 without any excuse. Devlet 1984 yilinda pasaportumu hicbir neden olmadigi halde bana vermeyi red ederek bana karsi saldirisini surdurdu.

State organized mobbing on me in every work place I entered during and after my college. Devlet Siyasal’da okurken ve bitirdin ten sonra girdigim her is yerinde bana mobbing yapti.

State fomented mobbing in the Foreign Ministry from my entrance in 1986. Devlet Disisleri’ne 1986 yilinda girisimden itibaren bana surekli mobbing yapilmasini tesvik etti.

State degraded my career diplomat class to administrative officer class to force me to resign and fired me in 1989 and with never ending abuses and 6 terminations until 1999 in the Foreign Ministry. Devlet beni istifaya zorlamak icin 1989 yilinda meslek memurlugundan idari memur sinifina tenzil etti ve Bakanliktan atti ve 19999 yilina kadar Disisleri’nden beni 6 kere atti ve hep surundurdu.

State went on assaulting me by stripping me from my earned rank and title in my 8 months long mandatory military service in 1987-1988 without any excuse and made me serve as a plain private. Devlet 1987-1988 doneminde 8 aylik mecburi askerlik hizmetimi yaparken kazandigim rutbe ve unvanimi vermeyip bana er olarak askerlik yaptirarak bana saldirisini surdurdu. State also fomented soldiers’ and officers’ mobbing on me. Devlet askerlerin ve subaylarin bana mobbing yapmasini tesvik etti.

State continued its mobbing in its own courts to review its own actions too. Devlet kendi islemlerini goz den gecirdigi kendi mahkemelerinde ve Avrupa Insan Haklari Mahkemesi’nde mobbingini surdurdu.

State continued its mobbing in my private sector employments and even in my marriage too. Devlet ozel sektordeki islerimde ve hatta iki evliligimde mobbingini surdurdu.

State even forced me to return of my last salary 10 years after my termination when I was in the USA and tripled my passport renewal time in New York Colsulate General and made me miss my trip to Italy. Devlet beni isten attiktan tam 10 yil sonra Amerika’da yasarken Disisleri’ndeki son maasimi benden zorla geri aldi ve kaybolan pasaportumu yenilemek icin islem suresi uc misli uzatarak Italyaya yapmak istedigim is gezisini kacirmama neden oldu.

I have to say truth to the retired ambassadors who cry out against government. Hukumete karsi aglayan emekli buyukelcilere gercegi soylemek zorundayim. They complain that the privileged career diplomat status is under attack by the government. Ayricalikli meslek memurlugu statusune hukumetin saldirdigindan sikayet ediyorlar. http://www.odatv.com/n.php?n=monserler-akpye-karsi-neden-ayaga-kalkti-2207131200

They should democratize access to employment status and working conditions in the foreign ministry. Disisleri’ndeki ise girme ve calisma kosullarini demokratiklestirmeleri gerekirdi. They should establish central test system by discarding oral exam. Sozlu sinavi kaldirip sadece merkezi test sistemini getirmeleri gerekirdi.

They should also accept all university grads equally to the central test system. Merkezi test sistemine butun universite mezunlarini esit sekilde almalari gerekir. They should support financially all working people in the Foreign Ministry to go to university and enter the central test system. Disislerinde calisan herkesin universite gitmesine maddi destek vermeleri ve sonra merkezi sinava girmelerine yardimci olmaliydilar. They should change all exams like in-job training and First secretary exam in the foreign ministry into central test system. Hizmetici egitim ve baskatiplik sinavi gibi Disisleri’ndeki butun sinavlari merkezi sisteme cevirmeleri gerekirdi.

They should establish a ministry wide discussion and electoral forum of all workers including most menial workers to elect for all posts with equal votes. Butun tayinlere esit oyla secim yapacak sekilde en dusuk islerde calisanlar dahil butun Disisleri calisanlarinin olusturdugu uygun Bakanlik capinda tartisma ve secim forumu kurulmaliydi.

Power should go from bottom up not top down and spread it to all other state institutions. Guc yukardan asagi degil asagidan yukari gitmeliydi ve bunu devletin her kurumuna yaymaliydilar. As they did not do anything democratic the have no right to speak now. Demokratik hicbirsey yapmadiklari icin simdi konusmaya haklari yok.

Let Ambassador Mahmut Dikerem answer to these shameless diplomats. Bu utanmazlara benim yerime Buyukelci Mahmut Dikerdem cevap versin. Dikerdem writes his 3 years work in the Peace Association is better than his 37 years in Foreign Ministry in paying his due to his country. Dikerdem memlekete olan borcunu odemekte 3 yillik Baris Dernegi calismasinin 37 yillik Disisleri calismasindan daha iyi oldugunu soyluyor. Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mahmut_Dikerdem

While Ambassador Mahmut Dikerdem suffered in the prisons for peace due to the Peace Assocition trial Ambassdor Semih Gunver was serving to the war-mongering arms dealer Altay Group which robs infant orphans’ right. Buyukelci Mahmut Dikerdem, Baris Dernegi Davasi’nda baris icin hapislerde surunurken Semih Gunver tuyu bitmemis yetim hakkini soyan savas kiskirticisi silah taciri Altay Kolektif sirketine hizmet ediyordu.

All of these diplomats brag serving to the brutal torturer human right abuser military regime. Bu diplomatlarin hepsi vahsi iskenceci insan haklari ihlalcisi askeri rejime hizmet etmekle ovunurler. Let alone opposing to the war they clearly brag in their protest statement as their cause of shining pride to serve to the war inside the war zones risking their
lives.
Savasa karsi cikmak bir tarafa dursun bu diplomatlar hayatlarini tehlikeye atarak savas bolgeleri icinde savasa hizmet etmekle acikca ovunerek bunu pariltili bir gurur vesilesi yapiyorlar ve protesto bildirilerinde yer veriyorlar. Anti-war diplomats rather listen to their conscience and resign than priding themselves to serve in the war zones. Savas karsiti diplomatlar savas bolgelerinde gorev yapmak tan gurur duymak yerine vicdanlarinin sesini dinleyip zips gigs ediyorlar. Here: Burda : http://www.commondreams.org/archive/2008/03/19/7765

Let’s go back to my family. Aileme geri donelim. But my father insulted me for my diplomat career too.Ancak babam bana Disisleri kariyerim icin de hakaret etti.

I had to live a little more in the Cebeci State Student Dormitory where I entered to study my master. Master okumak icin girdigim Devletin Cebeci Ogrenci Yurdunda biraz daha kalmak zorunda kaldim.

Actually I was very fortunate to find this dormitory again after two years of waiting.Aslinda iki yil bekledikten sonra tekrar bir yurt buldugum icin cok talihliydim.

Let me tell you why. Nedenini size soyleyeyim. After l passed 3rd year l wanted to go abroad to stay in a youth camp program to improve my language skills like my uncle Iskender Iskender’s son Omer Iskender.

Ucuncu sinifi gecince Iskender Iskender amcamin oglu Omer Iskender gibi yabanci dil pratigi icin yurt disinda bir genclik kampina gitmek istedim. I applied and paid all fees for a passport in Governor’s office in Adapazari but it was refused for a secret ban by the military
regime.
Pasaport almak icin Adapazarinda Valilikte yaptigim ve butun harclarini odedigim basvurum gizli bir yasakla red oldu.

My father yelled and beat me up for asking help about my passport and forced me to slave for him all summer in the farm. Babam pasaport icin yardim etmesini istedigim icin beni dovdu ve butun yaz mevsimini tarlada kendisine zorla kolelik yaparak gecirmemi emretti.

I spoke with Tahir Iskender to stay in his empty apartment in Uskudar in Istanbul. Istanbulun Uskudar semtindeki bos dairesinde kalmak icin Tahir Iskender ile konustum. Tahir’s father Mithat Iskender bought an apartment for his son to study in Istanbul. Tahirin babasi Mithat Iskender oglunun okumasi icin bir apartman almisti.
Tahir lived in his apartment with his wife Hatice and her brother Omer Iskender during school time and left their apartment empty during summer to go back to Kuyumculu. Tahir esi Hatice ve esinin kardesi olan Omer Iskender ile okul zamani burada oturuyor ve yazin koye donuyordu. Tahir left the apartment empty but refused to give me the he house key to let me stay there during summer. Tahir apartmani bos birakti fakat yaz mevsiminde benim burda kalmam icin anahtari bana vermeyi reddetti.

Remember Tahir Iskender is the man who used me as hitman to extract their stolen hazelnuts from inside a dangerous house as I carried 14-shot browning handgun before my college. Hatirlarsaniz Tahir Iskender Siyasal’a girmeden once belimde ondortlu tasidigim icin calinan findiklarini kurtarmak icin tetikci olarak beni cok tehlikeli bir evin icine goturen adamdir. That dangerous house belonged to a man called Suleyman the thief and I could get shot inside his house. Bu tehlikeli ev Hirsiz Suleyman lakapli birisine aitti. Breaking in the House of Suleyman the thief was really dangerous as he had many sons and one of them was Hazim Altinsoy who later on raped a woman after forcing her man away with his hunting rifle in Karasu beach. Hirsiz Suleyman’in evine zorla girmek gercekten cok tehlikeli idi cunku Suleyman’in bircok yetiskin oglu vardi ve bunlardan birisi olan Hazim Altinsoy daha sonra Karasu plajinda bir kadini av tufegi ile kocasindan zorla alip tecavuz etti.

Tahir the attorney used me as his hitman in breaking in most dangerous house in the village for his family’s stolen hazelnuts but threw me to ground like a trash when I needed to stay as a guest in his empty house in Istanbul. Avukat Tahir ailesinin calinan findigi icin koydeki en tehlikeli eve zorla girmek icin beni tetikcisi olarak kullanmis fakat Istanbul’daki bos evinde yazin misafir olarak kalma ihtiyacimi kendisine anlatinca beni bir cop gibi yere atmistir. Here: Burda: http://medyabar.com/haber/61223/azrail-pacasindan-yakaladi.aspx ; http://www.mebpersoneli.com.tr/mahkeme-kararlari/ogretmenin-ogrencisine-cinsel-istismar-davasinda-4-tahliye-h69966.html

Therefore I started to live in the student dormitory on duty in Istanbul which was far away in Istanbul. Bu nedenle Istanbul’da cok uzak olan nobetci ogrenci yurdunda kalmaya basladim. One night while I try to make a phone call from the coin operated public telephone boot in front of dormitory my coin got stuck the broken phone and security guard did not want to help me so l stated to shake the phone to free my stuck coins. Bir gece yurdun onundeki ankesorlu telefonla bir yeri aramak isterken jetonlarim icerde sikisti ve yurt bekcisi yardim etmek istemeyice mecburen jetonlarimi bozuk telefondan
kurtarmak icin telefonu sallamaya basladim.

The same security came with the manager on duty and I was evicted from the
dormitory immediately for coins which also banned me from all state dormitories in Turkey.
Ayni bekci nobetci muduru alip geldi ve bana telefon sallamak nedeniyle Turkiye’nin heryerindeki butun devlet yurtlarinda etkili olacak sekilde derhal yurttan ihrac islemi yapildi. Here: Burda : http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ankesörlü_telefon

First thing in the morning l went to the regional directorate of state dormitories in
lstanbul.
Sabah ilk is olarak Istanbul Yurtlar Bolge Mudurlugune gittim. Regional director called the dormitory and told me l lost my right to live in the state dormitories as
student from now on
Bolge Müdürü yurda telefon ettikten sonra bana ogrenci olarak devlet yurtlarinda kalma hakkimi tamamen kaybettigimi soyledi.

I started to live with other relatives but they tried to get rid of me so l was desperate for a solution. Oteki akrabalarin yaninda zor bela kalmaya basladim ama benden
kurtulmak icin ugrastiklari icin bir cozum bulmak zorundaydim.

Suddenly l met a Dutch woman named Ineke and we got friendly and she said she is flying back to Holland following day. Ansizin Hollandali Ineke isimli bir bayanla karsilastim ve birlikte arkadaslik kurduk ancak ertesi gun Hollandaya donuyorum dedi. I got in the
cab with her and went to the Yesilkoy airport together.
Taksiye onunla bindim ve beraber Yesilkoy havaalanina gittik. Here: Burda:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Istanbul_Atatürk_Airport

At the airport gatewe we hugged each other for goodbye but after a minute Ineke passed the door l followed and told the cops l must catch my wife she took all my stuff in English.
Now l passed all the doors with the same story telling cops that “my wife took all my stuff and l must catch her” and when I got together with Ineke between doors we spend time discussing what to do next. Arada Ineke ile ne yapmali diye konustuk ama butun kapilari gecmek icin polislere Ingilizce “karim herseyimi alip gitti yetismem lazim” dedim.

Ineke got very excited and took a lot of sedative and she wanted to sit separately inside plane. Ineke cok heyecanliydi ve cok yatistirici hap yuttu ve ucakta ayri oturmamizi
istedi. It was a charter plane for Turkish workers and the Turkish worker next to me had very dark skin, big mustache and corns and callouses in his hands and never said anything to me while I had only sandals, shorts and t-shirt. Bu ucak, THY’na ait Turk iscileri tasiyan bir charter ucagi idi ve yanimda oturan cok esmer, pala biyikli ve elleri nasirli bir Turk oturuyordu ve ben terlik, sort ve tisortle yaninda otururken bana tek kelime bile soylemedi.

Nobody asked me anything during flight and l did not move a bit but lost Ineke in the way. Ucus sirasinda kimse bana birsey sormadi ve ben de hic yerimden kalkmadim fakat ucus sirasinda Ineke’yi kaybettim. I was excited thinking air stewards will ask my papers and prepared myself with the same story. Hosteslerin ucus belgelerimi soracaklarini dusunup biraz heyecanlandim fakat ayni hikayeyi anlatmak icin kendimi hazirladim. I would say I had a fight my wife and she sits separately with my stuff. Esimle kavga ettigimi ve esimin esyalarimi alarak ayri bir yerde oturdugunu soyleyecektim. But nobody bothered me! Fakat hickimse beni rahatsian etmedi!

Finally our plane landed in Amsterdam, Capital city of Netherlands. Nihayet ucagimiz Hollandanin baskenti Amsterdama indi. l walked outside Schiphol with the same story. Ayni hikayeyi polislere anlatip Schiphol havaalanindan disari yuruyup ciktim.
Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amsterdam_Airport_Schiphol

I realized my goal with this trip and gave a much deserved lesson to the military regime which did not give me my passport and evicted me from my crappy dormitory. Bu gezi ile amacima ulasmis ve bana pasaportumu vermeyen ve berbat yurttan beni atan askeri rejime coktan hakettigi dersi vermistim. I hitch-hiked to Haarlem city where Ineke lived but ended up with Turkish people running a cafe bar. Otostop yaparak Ineke’nin yasadigi Haarlem
kentine geldim ancak Ineke’yi ararken Turklerin islettigi bir kafe bar mekanina dustum.

I spent three days looking for Ineke and trying to call my father for some information help but he did not even come to phone from teahouse. Ineke’yi aramak ve telefona bile cikmayan Kuyumcullu’daki babamdan bilgi yardimi almak icin uc gun ugrastim. I was trying to get the phone number of my relative Enver Yildiz who was guest worker in Holland but my father refused to come to the phone! Hollandada misafir isci olarak calisan akrabamiz enver Yildiz’in telefon numarasini almak icin ugrastim fakat babam telefona gelmeyi reddetti. Probably my father refused to come to telephone as he thought l have gone insane and was making a joke. Belki babam delirdigimi ve saka yaptigimi dusundu ve kizarak telefona gelmedi.

I stayed upstairs as guest and witnessed weird stolen tv purchase inside the cafe bar. Ust katta kaldim ve kafe bar mekanda acayip calinti tv alimina sahitlik ettim. A Dutch guy came with a hot TV set he jut stole from somewhere and asked something for it and
somebody bought it on the spot.
Bir Hollandali hala sicak olan TV setiyle hizla kafe bar mekanina daldi ve bunu satiyorum dedi ve birisi hemen satin aldi. After the seller guy
left they said this guy always does it and the TV set is still hot and he must have stolen again.
Adam ciktiktan sonra bu adam hep bu isi yapiyor, tv seti hala sicak, yine calmis herhalde dediler.

In the meantime, I was telling everybody a story like “l travelled all the way from Turkey by train for two weeks and lost my bag under my legs while sleeping in the train station”. Bu arada ben herkese “iki haftadir trenle Turkiyeden beri seyahat ediyorum ve istasyonda uyurken bacakalarimin altindan valizim calindi” seklinde bir hikaye anlatiyordum.

Turkish people was very nice and gave me shower, lodging, food, beer, cloths, and free international phone calls even offered more help to survive but while we were walking on the sidewalk undercover police grabbed and arrested me for not having an ID on me. Turkler bana karsi iyiydiler, banyo, yatak, yemek, bira ve giyecek verdiler, bedeva Turkiye’ye telefon ettirdiler ve daha cok yardim etmek icin de soz verdiler fakat yolda beraber yururken polis beni yakaladi ve kimlik olmadigi icin tutukladi.

Police kept me in super solitary confinement for seven says and l never saw any human
face or heard any body talking except the guard walking me to a room with high walls where I could see sky.
Polis beni tam yedi gun super tecritte tuttu ve duvarlari yuksek biraz gokyuzu gorulebilen bir odaya beni goturen gardiyan disinda hicbir insan yuzu gormedim ve insan sesi duymadim.

There was a toilet in my cel, walls were all white and lights were always
on
. Hucremde bir tuvalet vardi, duvarlar beyazdi ve isiklar hep acikti. It was torture in Holland. Holanda’da iskence idi. Supposedly Holland was respectful to human rights. Guya Hollanda insan haklarina saygili idi.

Netherland’s Police allowed commercial exchange of stolen goods but tortured me for defying passport ban from Turkey’s coup d’états and using my universal human right of travelling! Hollanda polisi calinti mallarin alinip satilmasina goz yumdu fakat Turkiye’nin darbe rejiminin koydugu pasaport yasagina karsi geldigim ve evrensel insan hakki olan seyahat hakkimi kullandigim icin bana iskence yapti. Solitary is torture. Tecrit bir iskencedir. Here: Burda: http://ccrjustice.org/solitary-factsheeta

After seven days in solitary confinement two guys came to my cell, one of them said “he is Turkish translator and will translate” even though I never needed a translator and he said because l do not have passport othe guy charges me for illegal immigration. Yedi gun gectikten sonra iki adam hucreme geldi, birisi “ben Turkce tercumaniyim ben tercume yapicam” dedi halbuki hicbir zaman tercuman ihtiyaci olmadi ve bana pasaportum olmadigi icin kacak gocmen muamelesi yaptiklarini soyledi.

I asked the translator who is the other Duch guy he said Dutch guy is a prosecutor. Tercumana Hollandalinin gorevini sorunca bana savcidir dedi. Then I directly asked Dutch guy what was his position and Dutch guy said he is police officer and l told Dutch guy that translator says he is prosecutor. Ondan sonra Hollandaliya dogrudan gorevin nedir diye sordum o da ben polisim dedi ben de Tercuman senin icin savcidir diyor dedim.

Deception torture after solitary torture! Tecrit iskencesinden sonra aldatma iskencesi!They closed the matter and two udercovers took me to the Turkish consulate in Rotterdam to get a pass check for me. Konuyu kapatilar ve iki sivil polis beni seyahat belgesi almak icin Roterdamdaki Turk konsolosluguna goturdu. Here: Burda:

http://rotterdam.bk.mfa.gov.tr

A young lame consulate official who did not introduced himself to me, prepared my pass check then cops drove me to the Schiphol airport. Unvanini soylemeyen topal bir genc Turk konsolosluk gorevlisi seyahat belgesini hazirladi ve ayni sivil Hollandali polisler beni Schiphol havaalanina goturdu.

They confined me in a room and then they put a very agitated Portuguese youth in the same room. Beni ucak kalkana kadar bir odaya hapsettiler ve yanima yerinde duramayan bir portekizli genc getirdiler. He said he is a drug addict then they gave me my papers and put me in the Dutch KLM plane. Portekizli uyusturucu muptelasi
oldugunu anlatti ve sonra benim belgelerimi verip Hollandali KLM ucagina bindirdiler.

As we arrived in Istanbul stewards knew my status and they ordered me to go to police alone. Istanbul’a varinca ucaktaki gorevliler benim durumumu biliyorlardi ve bana polise yalniz basima gitmemi emrettiler. Police must be waiting to arrest me so l just walked by
the police check point while one policeman was working to finish a long passenger line and exited airport.
Polis beni yakalamak icin bekliyor olmaliydi o nedenle tek bir polis cok buyuk bir kuyrugun onunde pasaprtlarla canla basla ugrasirken ben hizla yanindan gecip havaalindan cikip gittim.

As l lost my dormitory right in Istanbul l could not get it back until l got into master program and had to live three terrible places during my fourth year and summer. Istanbulda yurttan atildigim icin Ankara’da dorduncu sinifta okurken ve yazin mastera gidinceye kadar yurtta kalamadim ve mecburen cok kotu uc yerde kaldim.

My first place was in Topraklik neighborhood and worse than my father’s barn . Ilk yerim Topraklik semtindeydi ve babamin ahirindan kotuydu. It was slum house down a steep slop and attached with other structures. Dik bir yokusun dibinde oteki yapilara
bitisik olan bir gecekondunun bir tek odasi idi.

Its owner was white bearded old man. Evin sahibi beyaz sakalli yasli bir adamdi. Neighbors told me that slum lord’s son plays drum for famous Turkish singer Baris Manco. Komsular gecekondu agasi beyaz sakalli adamin oglunun unlu Turk muzisyeni Baris Manco’nun grubunda davul caldigini soylediler. It was surprising to me that such a reactionary looking slumlord’s son is making progressive music with famous Baris Manco. Bu kadar geri gorunen bir gecekondu agasinin oglunun unlu muzisyen Baris Manco ile beraber ilerici muzik yapmasi benim icin sasirticiydi.

The same neighbours also asked me and showed their respect and admiration as I answered them I was in my final year at the college and working as translator/correspondent in evening shift at the General Directorate of Press-Publication and Information. Ayni komsular sorunca Siyasal son sinifta okudugumu ve Basin-Yayin ve Enformasyon Genel Mudurlugunde aksam vardiyasinda Tercuman/muhabir olarak calistigimi soyledigim zaman bana saygi ve hayranliklarini gosterdiler.

I even mention my surprise to Ambassador Semih Gunver when he asked me about my place of living while he was driving me from my college to my work in the General Directorate of Press-Publication and Information. Bu saskinligimi arabasiyla beni Siyasal’dan cikip calistigim Basin-Yayin ve Enformasyon Genel Mudurlugune gotururken nerde kaldigimi soran Buyukelci Semih Gunver’e de soylemistim.

Constant noise from children playing upstairs was big problem. Ust katta surekli oynayan cocuklarin gurultusu cok buyuk sorundu. It was a decrepit small slum room and common toilet was outside standalone in the yard and there was no shower or kitchen available. Bu kucuk berbat bir gecekondu odasiydi, ortak tuvalet binanin disinda toprak bahcedeydi ve banyo ile mutfak yoktu.

There was similar room right across my door but l never saw anybody living in that
room.
Kapimin tam karsisinda benzer bir oda vardi fakat ben orda yasayan komsulari hic gormedim.

On the Cyprus street on my way going to my college there was a very small street vendor selling second hand books . Siyasal’a giderken yolumun ustunde Kibris caddesi uzerinde eski kitap satan bir seyyar satici vardi. From this young vendor l bought a book written by
former Prime Minister Prof. Nihat Erim who was leftist originally but was shot by armed leftists for torturing leftists.
Bu genc saticidan bastan solcu olup Basbakan olunca solculara iskence
yaptirdigi icin vurulan Prof. Nihat Erim tarafindan yazilan bir kitap aldim.

This vendor told me the horrible tortures he suffered during his arrest by military regime. Bu satici bana tutukluyken askeri rejim tarafindan kendisine yapilan korkunc
iskenceleri anlatti. Sad part of it was that Ambassador Semih Gunver who defended this bloody military regime for years as representative at the Council of Europe, acted as a friend to me and wrote in the so called leftist Republic newspaper. Isin aci tarafi Buyukelci Semih Gunver’in bu askeri rejimi Avrupa Konseyinde daimi temsilci olarak yillarca savunmus birisi olarak bana arkadas gibi davranmis olmasi ve sozde solcu Cumhuriyet Gazetesinde yazilar yazmasidir.

Semih Gunver complained that he received unfair criticisms to defend the military regime as ambassador and expressed he was happy that now he can answer them in a leftist newspaper. Semih Gunver Buyukelci sifatiyla iskenceci askeri rejimi savundugu seklinde haksiz elestiriler aldigindan sikayet ederdi ve simdi bunlara sol gazetelerde cevap veriyor olmaktan mutlu oldugunu soylerdi.

My father and brother Sezai Iskender stopped to see my decrepit slum room in a night on their way to eastern Turkey to go to my brother’s military service unit. Babam ve kardesim Sezai dogudaki askerlik gorevine giderken yol uzerinde durup benim kaldigim berbat gecekondu odasini gormek icin geldiler. My father ridiculed me by resembling my
place to a barn.
Babam kaldigim yeri bir ahira benzeterek benle alay etti. My father joined my brother Sezai to go to a long way to eastern Turkey but never travelled with me during my all life except one bus trip to my college when he beat me up for my hunger. Babam kardesim Sezaiye askerde doguya yaptigi uzun yolculukta yaninda yer aldi ama Siyasal’a gelirken otobuste ac oldugum icin beni dovdugu zamanki haric hicbir zaman yanimda gelmedi.

Life was not easy in my room. Odamda hayatim kolay degildi. I
had to take shower and wash my cloths in public bath in Topraklik down town.
Topraklik carsisindaki hamama gidip yikanmak ve camasir yikamak zorundaydim. I tried to cut my bath cost by sneaking in the sports center of my college. Siyasalin spor salonuna gizlice girip yikanmaya calistim.

Athletes got mad and yelled at me if they saw me in the showers. Sporcular eger beni yikanirken yakalarlarsa kizip bana bagiriyorlardi. I used to ask them “why do you get crazy for your double privileges”? Onlara “neden cifte ayricaliginiz icin boyle deliriyorsunuz? diye sorardim. They had playing privilege and then showering privilege but l had none because l was rejected by the system.

Onlarin hem oyun oynamak hem de yikanmak ayricaligi vardi fakat sistem tarafindan red
oldugum icin benim elim bostu. One day l helped another homeless student who was looking for a place. Birgun kalacak yer arayan bir ogrenciye yardim icin yer verdim. He was very mad at me because l could read Foreign Policy and other journals and listen to British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC) radio on short waves everyday.. Hergun kisa dalga uzerinden Ingilizce BBC radyosunu dinledigim ve Dis Poitika ve benzeri ingilizce
yayinlar okudugum icin bana cok kiziyordu.

One day he threatened me in a scary way even though he was half my size. Benim yarim kadar olmasina ragmen birgun beni korkunc sekilde tehdit etti. He said “l can drop a few drops of water on your back when you sleep and when you wake up you will think l raped you”. “Sen uyurken arkana birkac damla su damlatirim ve sen uyaninca benim sana tecavuz ettigimi dusunursun” dedi.

He left without saying anything in a few days for good and l never saw him again for years until in a bus trip where he moved next to me in an empty bus squeezed me to the window all
the way.
Birkac gun sonra hicbirsey soylemeden ansizin kayboldu ve yillar sonra bir otobus yolculugunda beni taniyarak aniden ortaya cikti ve bombos otobuste gelip benim yanima
oturdu ve beni yol boyunca cama dogru sikistirdi. His father was an educated bank employee. Babasi egitimli bir banka gorevlisiydi.

He said he finished his school and working for a construction company like a bookkeeper. Okulu bitirdigini ve bir insaat şirketinin santiye muhasebesini tuttugunu soyledi. He glorified English band deep purple as usual in my place and now upgraded to motorcycling. Odamda herzaman yaptigi gibi Ingiliz heavy metal grubu Deep Purple’i ve yeni basladigi motorsikletciligi yuceltti. Here:
Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep_Purple ;

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Motorcycling

When I was very little like 4 my grand mother used me to beat and force unwilling cows to get them raped by raging bulls inside our family cow pen right by our old house. Ben 4 yasimdayken Babaannem beni eski evimizin bitisigindeki avlu icinde azgin bogalarin direnen danalara tecavuz etmeleri amaciyla danalari dovup zorlamak icin beni egitip kullandi. My leftist roommates led by a French Private High School grad in the Republic Dormitory masturbated to my bed when I was away and bullied me to establish their domination over me in 1980. 1980 yilinda Cumhuriyet Yurdunda Ozel Fransiz Lisesi mezunu bir siyasalli ogrencinin basini cektigi oda arkadaslarim uzerimde hakimiyet kurabilmek amaciyla benim olmadigim saatte yatagima masturbasyon yaptilar ve ben gelince de beni tehdit ettiler. In the final year of my college my leftist homeless student roommate who I let to stay in my slum house room made his bizarre rape threat like he can drop a little water on my back to make me believe he raped me during my sleep. Siyasal’da son sinifta iken evsiz oldugu icin aciyip gecekondu odama aldigim solcu evsiz ogrenci beni korkutmak icin uyurken arkama biraz su dokecegini ve ben uyaninca bana tecavuz ettigini dusunecegimi soyledi.

When I was fired from the Foreign Ministry I lived with a girl friend in her apartment who teased me in every way she could. Disisleri’nden ilk atildigim zaman evinde yasadigim kiz arkadasim beni her yonden makaraya aliyordu. My girl friend was only elementary school grad from Black Sea Town Findikli of Rize Province but had well-paid union job as type-writer in State Oil Office General Directorate and luxury apartment purchased by her family in high-scale Asagi Ayranci neighbourhood. Kiz arkadasim Rize ilinin Findikli Kasabasindan ilkokul mezunu idi fakat Petrol Ofisi Genel Müdürlüğü’nde daktilo memuru olarak yuksek maasla sendikali isci statusunde calisiyor ve zengin semti olan Asagi Ayranci sentinde ailesinin aldigi luks dairede oturuyordu. My girl friend took me to her house and forced me to sign for marriage by using her sexuality and financial power. Kiz arkadasim benim zor durumumdan istifa de etmek icin beni evine almis, cinsellik ve maddiyatini kullanarak beni nikah yapmaya zorluyordu.

I was so agitated by her abusing me like this. Beni boyle kullanip sikistirmasindan dolayi cok sinirliydim. She would do all sexual acts but still claimed that she was virgin and I would get nothing without signing marriage. Her turlu cinsel iliskiyi yapiyor fakat hala ben bakireyim benimle nikah yapmazsan havayi alirsin diyordu.

Her elder brother was a leftist forestry engineer and insulted us for living together without marriage when he took us out for a dinner. Abisi solcu bir orman muhendisi idi ve nikah siz birlikte yasadigimiz icin bize goturdugu yemek davetinde hakaret etmisti. She raped me for marriage and her brother insulted for this on top of it. Kiz arkadasim evlenmek icin bana tecavuz etti ve ustune abisi bunun icin hakaret etti.

On top of all these abuses and insults she left me alone in the apartment and took her bus to spend the summer in Findikli in 1990. Bu baski ve hakaretlerin ustune 1990 yilinda yaz tatilini gecirmek icin beni evde yalniz birakip ailesiyle yaz tatilini gecirmek icin otobuse atlayip Findikliya gitti. I also took the money for my bus trip from the chest in the house and went to Kuyumcullu and joined with the villagers to save our village beach. Ben de evdeki kasadaki parayi kendime yol parasi olarak alip Kuyumcullaya gittim ve koy plajini kurtarmak icin koylulerle birlestim. When I returned she insulted me for the the money and I terminated my abusive relationship with her. Ankaraya dondugum kasadan aldigim para icin bana hakaret edince onunla bu kotu iliskiye son verdim.

In my slum room one early morning like 3am l woke up due to noise from my door as some people were forcing to break into my decrepit room. Gecekondu odamdamyken bir gece sabaha karsi uc sularinda birileri berbat odama girmek icin kapimi zorlarken cikan gurultuden uyandim. Instantly l started to roar strangely with my all force to scare the breakers
and wake up neighbours at least.
Aninda kapiyi zorlayanlari korkutmak veya en azindan komsulari uyandirmak icin butun gucumle bir acayip naralar atmaya basladim. I did not even have a stick for self defense but l showed that l am ready to fight back and die like a lion against attackers. Mesru mudafa icin bir cubugum bile yoktu fakat saldirganlara karsi aslan gibi dovuserek olmeye hazir oldugumu gosterdim. Nobody came to my roars.
Naralarima hic kimse gelmedi. I thought it was an attack to rape me as nobody can expect to find any money in this slum room. Bu gecekondu odasinda hickimse para bulmayi dusunemeyeceginden bu saldirinin tecavuz icin yapildigini dusundum.

One night l found a letter shoved under my slum room door by my white bearded
slumlord when l came home
. Birgece odama geldigim zaman beyaz sakalli gecekondu agasinin kapimin altindan iceri attigi bir mektup buldum. It was a very caring letter from a nice female doctorate student in my college. Mektup, Siyasal’daki guzel bir bayan doktora ogrencisinden geliyordu.

l met and chat with her in the periodicals section of our college library where l loved to read international news and opinions everyday and she used to study her doctorate thesis and take notes on her cards. Onun doktora tez arastirmasi yaparken kartlara notlar aldigi ve benim uluslararasi haberleri ve gorusleri okumak icin hergun geldigim Siyasal kutuphanesinin sureli yayinlar bolumunde tanisip konusmustum onunla.

By the way, I visited periodicals section room everyday to read international periodical publications as soon as I started my college. Sirasi gelmisken, Siyasal’a girer girmez uluslararasi sureli yayinlara bakmak icin sureli yayinlar odasini hergun ziyaret ediyordum. I felt like I am monitoring pulse of the world in this periodicals room. Sureli yayinlar odasinda dunyanin nabzini tutuyormusum gibi geliyordu bana. You would only find postgraduates and professors in this room not any undergrads. Bu odada sadece yuksek lisans yapanlari ve profesorleri bulurdunuz bu odada, hicbir lisans ogrencisi yoktu.

First of all you needed high level foreign language skills here. Herseyden once burda ileri duzeyde yabanci dil yetenegi gerekiyordu. Those students proved their skills to pass the exam to join the international relations department in the college. Bu ogrenciler bu yeteneklerini Siyasal’da Uluslararasi Iliskiler Bolumu’ne girmek icin yapilan sinavi gecerek ispatliyordular.

But all in those years I never saw any of my class mates in this room. Fakat onca yildir hicbir sinif arkadasimin bu odaya geldigini gormedim. I think same about visiting museum of Anatolian civilizations. Anadolu Medeniyetleri Muzesi’ne ziyaret konusunda da ayni dusunuyorum. I never saw anybody from my college visiting the museum in my so many visits throughout years. Yillar boyunca Muzeye yaptigim onca ziyarette Siyasal’dan hic kimseyi gormedim. When Prof. Ozham Uluatam asked if anybody visited the museum I said at least 50 times while nobody else ever did in my second year in my college. Siyasal ikinci siniftayken Prof. Orhan Uluatam Muzeyi hic ziyaret eden var mi diye sorunca ben 50’den fazla gittim dedigim zaman baska hic kimse cikmamisti. Here: Burda: http://www.ismetinonu.org.tr/index.php/uluslararasi-siyasette-kazanimlari/savas-yillari-politikalari/81

When you visit this museum you monitor different worlds before your eyes inside a hall. Bu muzeyi ziyaret ederken bir salonun icinde gozlerinizin onunde farkli dunyalari izliyorsunuz. Your horizon opens and your respect to differences grows. Ufkunuz acilir ve farkliliklara sayginiz buyur. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Museum_of_Anatolian_Civilizations ; http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ankara_Üniversitesi_Siyasal_Bilgiler_Fakültesi_Uluslararası_İlişkiler_Bölümü

Her letter shined and filled and warmed my decrepit slum room with love. Onun mektubu fakir gecekondu odami sevgiyle isildatti, doldurdu ve isitti. Her letter was inviting me to meet her in our grads club in Kizilay. Mektubunda beni Kizilay’daki mulkiyeliler birliginde bulusmaya cagiriyordu.

I went to meet her in the grads club and we sat down inside and talked. Mulkiyeliler Birligine gittim ve icerde oturup konustuk. She said she lives with her family
in Kavaklidere around upscale Kugulu Park and her elder brother is well known scholar graduated from our college and doing his post doctorate in world class Paris-Sorbonne university.

Varikli sinifin yasadigi Kavakliderede Kugulu Park civarinda ailesiyle oturdugunu ve abisinin Siyasal’dan mezun olduktan sonra Paris-Sorbonne’da Doktorasini bitirip hocalik yaptigini soyledi.

I think she was very status conscious and I never saw her again. Sanirim cok statu duskunuydu ve kendisini bir daha hic gormedim.

While living in my decrepit slum room l started to volunteer to help for Prof. Baskin Oran in Capital City newspaper in around Demirtepe where l met two other students and we walked back to Kizilay together. Berbat gecekondu odamda yasarken Demirtepe civarinda olan Baskent gazetesinde Prof. Baskin Oran’a gonullu yardim etmeye basladim.

http://www.baskinoran.com/Ozgecmis-web.doc

Prof. Oran never mentions this Capital newspaper in his short biography but l
am sure he will mention in a longer autobiography in the future.
Prof. Oran, Baskent Gazetesi’ne ozgecmisinde yer vermiyor ama eminim daha uzun bir otobiyografide bundan
bahseder.

One night while l was walking together with two other young journalists from Capital City newspaper to Kizilay the guy kept calling the woman as his intimate friend “dostum” and she
reacted angrily to him as “l am not your intimate friend “dostum”, never call me like this again.”
Bir gece Baskent Gazetesinde calisan diger iki gazeteciyle ciktik ve Kizilay’a dogru yolda yururken erkek kadina “dostum” diye hitap etmeye baslayinca bayan sert tepki gostererek bana bir daha “dostum” diye onu azarladi.

After that guy left l sat with the woman journalist in a bakery in Kizilay to drink tea and she told me that CIA was training secret army how to torture people and terrorize Turkey. Erkek ayrildiktan sonra bayan gazeteciyle Kizilay’da bir pastanede oturup konusurken bana
CIA’nin Turkiye’de gizli bir orduya iskence yapmayi ve Turkiye’ye terorizmi getirdigini soyledi.

I defended Turkish state by arguing against her that Turkish state is not that slave to
CIA
! Ona karsi Turk devletinin CIA’ya o kadar kole olmadigini iddia ederek Turk devletini savundum. I wish we had internet social media in those days! Keske o gunlerde Internet sosyal medya olsaydi!

As the same Turkish state fired me from the Foreign Ministry I went to a panel discussion about human rights in my college and argued that the Turkish state practices systematic torture and military coup d’état is torture itself. Ayni Turk devleti beni Disisleri Bakanligi’ndan atinca Siyasal’da duzenlenen insan haklari konusunda bir panele gittim ve Turk devletinin sistematik iskence yaptigini ve askeri darbenin zaten iskencenin kendisi oldugunu soyledim.

Soon editor Eymur in the Capital City newspaper told me he also graduated from my international relations department and liked my published translated articles with my name and invited me to work with him in the Press and Publication in the night shift after my class hours. Fazla gecmeden Baskent gazetesinin editoru Eymur kendisinin de benim okudugum uluslararasi Iliskiler bolumunden mezun oldugunu ve imzamla cikan tercume makalelerimi begendigini soyledi ve kendisinin calistigi Basin Yayin Genel Müdürlüğü’nde aksam vardiyasinda calismak icin beni davet etti.

After l passed translation test by the head of news department l immediately started to work in the night shift and got my prestigious permenant press card which let me use municipal buses for free. Haber Dairesi baskaninin yaptigi tercume sinavini gecerek derhal gece vardiyasinda calismaya basladim ve saygin daimi basin karti alarak belediye otobuslerine ucretsiz bindim.

Famous Turkish politician Bulent Ecevit also worked in Press and Publication General Directorate as English translator. Unlu Turk politikaci Bulent Ecevit de Basin Yayin Genel Müdürlüğü’nde Ingilizce tercumani olarak calismisti. Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bülent_Ecevit; http://home.arcor.de/osoysal/Neuer%20Ordner/messages/45.htm

I had direct access to world news and free evening meals and drop off van service too. Dunya haberlerini dogrudan goruyor ve ucretsiz aksam yemegi yiyor ve is bitince minibus servisi ile eve gidiyordum. But if l go to visit my Polish girlfriend Maria one troublemaker guy in the van would bully me why I change my destination and who l am seeing there. Fakat eger bayan arkadasim Maria’nin evine gitmek istersem minibuste oturan bir basbelasi personel neden gittigim yeri degistirdigimi ve orada kimi gordugumu sorup beni rahatsiz ederdi.

Soon another English translator in my office from the Middle East Technical University offered me to rent an available room in their apartment. Cok gecmeden Ortadogu Teknik Universitesinden gelen dairedeki oteki ingilizce Tercuman apartmanlarinda bosalan bir odayi kiralayip evlerinde kalmami teklif etti.

I immediately moved in new house as it was in much better Maltepe neighborhood and nice building but inside our apartment was in need of renovation. Cok daha iyi
bir semt olan Maltepede ve guzel bir binada oldugu icin hemen tasindim fakat dairenin icinin cok tamire ihtiyaci vardi.

Soon our landlady who was a female pharmacy store owner evicted everybody and came to speak with me. Bayan bir eczane sahibi olan evsahibi evdeki herkesi tahliye
ettikten sonra beni gormek icin eve geldi. Landlady pharmacist said this eviction story is a long story and it was mean that other tenants cheated me like this but she offered me to rent
her apartment alone.
Evsahibi bayan eczaci bu tahliye hikayesinin eski oldugunu ve diger kiracilarin beni bu tahliye olan eve getimelerinin cok kotu oldugunu soyledi fakat istersem evi
tek basina bana kiralamayi teklif etti. My two co-workers tricked me and then run away to their new places and left me alone in the apartment. Iki is arkadasim beni oyuna getirmisler, yeni yerlerine kacip gitmisler ve apartmanda beni tek basima birakmislardi.

I realized that my two co-workers, the translator and supervisor Osman who
brought me in this house were really mean people.
Beni bu eve getiren Tercuman ve sef Osman’in cok kotu insanlar oldugunu anladim. Supervisor Osman and Translator
moved in different places but never even asked what I will do now.
Sef Osman ve Tercuman baska yerlere tasinmislar fakat bana ne yapacagimi bile sormamislardi.

In the meantime my father came and robbed all my savings and soon Selim Atalay fired me Anatolian News Agency after forcing me quit from the Press and Publication. Bu arada babam gelip butun parami soyup gitmis ve Sef Selim Atalay beni once Basin-Yayin Genel
Mudurlugu’nden koparttiktan sonra Anadolu Ajansi’ndan atmisti.Here: Burda:

https://eksisozluk.com/selim-atalay–2085445

Under these terrible conditions I had to decline landlady pharmacist’s offer to rent her nice apartment and look for something l could afford.Bu berbat kosullar altinda evsahibi bayan eczacinin bana kiralamayi teklif ettigi bu apartmani geri cevirmek ve butceme uygun bir oda bakmak zorunda kaldim.

By the way, l had to deal with roommate Supervisor Osman Basaran. Bu arada, evde Sef Osman Basaran’la ugrasmak zorunda kaldim. One night as l came from work to my room l got really mad when l found Osman Basaran laying on his stomach in my bed and started screaming “get out of here” and he just walked away to his own room. Birgun odama girdigim zaman Osman Basaran’i yatagimda yuzustu yatarken bulunca cok sinirlendim ve “defol burdan” diye bagirmaya basladim ve Osman hicbirsey olmamis gibi cikip kendi odasina gitti.

Also English translator housemate threatened me to get beaten by cops if I did not give him last room rent as if it was not enough that he trapped me in his evicted apartment. Ingilizce Tercuman da beni tahliye olan dairede tuzaga dusurdugu yetmiyormus gibi eger son oda kirasini vermezsem beni polise verip dovdurmekle tehdit etti. English translator even secretly followed me to the Anatolian News Agency like a spy and threatened me to get fired from my jobs. Ingilizce Tercuman bir casus gibi gizlice beni takip edip Anadolu Ajansina geldi ve kirayi vermezsem beni islerimden attirmakla tehdit etti. I believe he spoke with my managers to get me fired. Beni attirmak icin mudurlerle konusup beni haksizca sikayet ettigine inaniyorum.

Finally l found a small change room in an old swimming pool in Altindag neighborhood. Nihayet Altindag semtindeki eski yuzme havuzunda kucuk bir soyunma odasi buldum. Head of neighborhood was living with his family in his house next to the swimming pool and was slumlord of this slum pool business. Mahalle muhtari havuzun bitisigindeki evinde ailesiyle birlikte duruyordu ve yuzme havuzunun gecekondu agaligini yapiyordu.

After l started my master class l saw and spoke a little bit with Ümit Aslanbay in the college. Master derslerim icin Siyasal’a gittigimde Ümit Aslanbay’i gorunce ayakustu konustuk. My department international relations and his department public administration had joint class of Economic Systems from Prof. Yahya Sezai Tezel and Criminal Law and Criminology Class in the second year. ikinci siniftayke bizim uluslararasi Iliskiler
bolumu ile onun kamu yonetimi bolumu ortak olarak Ceza Hukuku ve Kriminoloji dersi ile Prof. Yahya Sezai Tezel’den Iktisadi Sistemler dersi aldik.

So we knew each other from second year. Bu nedenle birbirimizi ikinci siniftan beri taniyorduk. Ümit Aslanbay said he is working in Republic newspaper and wanted to make a news for my life in the swimming pool room as a master student. Ümit Aslanbay Cumhuriyet Gazetesinde muhabirlik yaptigini ve Siyasal’da bir master ogrencisi olarak Altindag’daki
yuzme havuzu soyunma odasinda gecen hayatimi haberlestirmek istegini soyledi.

Then for some reason we never saw each other again until our celebration party for the new career diplomats in the Foreign Ministry entrees in Ankara Palace State Guesthouse. Nedense birbirimizi goreve yeni baslayan meslek memurlari icin Ankara Palas Devlet
Konukevinde verilen kutlama gecesine kadar hic goremedik.

Nearly a year passed since he promised to make a news about me in Republic newspaper and Ümit Aslanbay said he is really surprised that l entered this creme dela creme diplomatic position in the country from that decrepit Altindag swimming pool. Ümit Aslanbay’in
hayatimla ilgili Cumhuriyet’te haber yapma sozu vermesinden sonra yaklasik bir yil gecmisti ve benim Altindag ‘daki o berbat havuzun soyunma odasindan ulkenin en kaymak meslegi olan Disisleri meslek memurluguna girdigimi gorerek gercekten sasirdigini soyledi. Here : Burda: http://www.odatv.com/n.php?n=tarafin-kunyesine-giren-surpriz-isim-kim-2704131200 ; http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ankara_Palas ; http://www.taraf.com.tr/umit-aslanbay/makale-hipperr-gercekler.htm

After I joined the Foreign Ministry I had to live a little longer in the Cebeci Student Dormitory which was very difficult to enter as a master student. Disisleri’ne girdikten sonra master ogrencisi olarak guc bela girdigim Cebeci Ogrenci Yurdunda bir sure daha kalmaya mecbur kaldim.

My pay for the diplomatic creme dela creme job did not even pay the rent for smallest apartment with food and basic needs. En kaymak meslek sayilan diplomatik
meslekte aldigim aylikla en kucuk apartmanin kirasini karsilayip yiyecek ve temel ihtiyaclarimi odeyemiyordum.

Even though I posted an add in the notice board for the Ministry personnel looking for an affordable apartment with my pay it did not yield any result for years. Bakanlik personel duyuru panosuna aldigim aylikla kirasini odeyebilecegim bir daire aradigim seklinde bir ilan koymama ragmen yillarca bir sonuc cikmadi.

I used to live with 15 other students in a stuffy room filled with bunkers like a prison. Hapishane gibi ranzalarla dolu havasiz bir odada 15 ogrenci ile beraber kaliyordum. Dormitory Directorate did not allow me to use my dormitory address in the Foreign Ministry exam. Yurt Müdürlüğü yurdun adresini Disisleri sinavlarinda kullanmama izin vermedi. I had no choice but use my Kuyumcullu village address. Kuyumcullu
koyu adresini kullanmaktan baska carem kalmamisti.

Therefore the Ministry sent the telegram to Kuyumcullu village notifying me to start my new career diplomat job in a very short time. Bu nedenle Disisleri Bakanligi,
yeni meslek memurlugu isime cok acele baslamami emreden telgrafi Kuyumcullu koyune cekmisti. My father took this telegram and never noticed me. Babam bu telgrafi
almis ve bana asla haber vermemisti.

I told my father many times to notify me for any news for me in this crappy dormitory where l lived more than a year. Bana birsey gelirse bir yildan fazla kaldigim bu berbat yurtta bana haber vermesini babama cok soyledim. But still I knew he would burn me if he could so l asked the Ministry personnel department everyday and started to work my new caree diplomat job. Babamin beni gucu yeterse yakacagini bildigim icin hergun personel dairesini aradim ve sonunda Disisleri’nde yeni diplomatik meslek memurluguma basladim. Calendar showed 22 December 1986. Takvim 22 Aralik 1986’yi gosteriyordu.

Soon when I visit Kuyumcullu village l asked my father about the Foreign Ministry telegram. Fazla gecmeden Kuyumcullu koyune gittigim zaman babama Disisleri’nin bana cektigi telgrafi sordum. He said that he did not know what this telegram was all about and did not understand why the Ministry sent it to Kuyumcullu village. Babam bu telgrafin neyle alakali oldugunu bilemedigini ve Disisleri’nin bunu neden Kuyumcullu’ya yolladigini anlamadigini soyledi. Therefore he trashed my telegram. Bu nedenle telgrafimi yok etmisti.

He tried to scare me by saying that I will starve by my miserable diplomat paychecks and get shot by Armenians. Babam Bakanligin sefil diplomat maaslari yuzunden aclik cekecegimi ve Ermeniler tarafindan vurulacagimi soyleyip beni korkutmaya calisti. It
took a few months for my paycheck to rescue me from my prison-like dormitory.
Maasimin beni kaldigim hapishane benzeri yurttan kurtarmasi bir kac ayi buldu.

My economic situation would be perfect contrary to my father’s scare-mongering if I was not hit from my behind so many times by my own state. Eger kendi devletim tarafindan bir cok kere sirtimdan vurulmasaydim babamin oculerle korkutmasina ragmen ekonomik durumum mukemmel olacakti. In fact, Armenian ASALA already dissolved after 1983 Orly massacre . Aslinda 1983 Orly katliamindan sonra ASALA dagilmisti. I was victim of back stabbing from my own state and my father and brothers, but not of ASALA! ASALA’nin degil beni arkamdan vuran kendi devletimin, babamin ve oz kardeslerimin kurbani oldum. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Armenian_Secret_Army_for_the_Liberation_of_Armenia#Dissolution

My father refused to help me. Babam bana yardim etmeyi reddetti. One day my father unexpectedly came to the Foreign Ministry and was very upset at me because l could not stop everything instantly and bring him to my room. Birgun babam aniden Disisleri Bakanligi’na geldi ve herseyi aninda birakip neden kendisini yukari odama cikarmadigimi soyleyip bana kizdi.

My father did not believe me that l was not allowed to stop my work and bring my family members to my room and asked the security at the door in my presence if it is true just shame me. Istedigim zaman isimi birakmama ve aile fertlerini odama cikartmaya izin verilmedigini
soyleyince bana inanmadi ve beni utandirmak icin muracaatta gorevli guvenlik gorevlisine yanimda ayni seyi sordu.

After this shaming as he wanted to eat l took him to a very quiet and simple restaurant not far from the Ministry but in the restaurant he got very mad at me suddenly yelling that “this is a drinking tavern, why you brought me to a tavern”! Bu utandirmadan sonra babam yemek yemek isteyince kendisini kosedeki sakin ve basit bir restorana goturdum fakat iceride bana aniden kizarak “burasi ickili taverna, niye beni meyhaneye getirdim” diye bagirmaya basladi.

I was in shock thinking why my father is making non-stop troubles for me instead of feeling happy as l work in the best career and even if this was a tavern so what he was not so religious anyway and asked him why he called this a tavern. Babam, zaten oyle dinci degil
ve Turkiye’nin en iyi mesleginde calistigim icin sevinecegine neden bana hep sorun cikariyor diye dusunup sok olmus vaziyette neden restorana ickili meyhane dedigini sordum. He showed me water glasses on our table and told me they are alcohol glasses. Masamizin ustundeki su bardaklarini gosterip bunlarin icki bardagi oldugunu soyledi.

I was in real shock with the fact that my father is upset with me because of my career success and looking for trouble in any false excuse. Babamin benim mesleki basarimdan dolayi bana kizgin oldugunu ve her turlu yapay bahane ile sorun cikartmak istedigini gorerek gercek bir sok yasiyordum. While in shock l began to look at the walls hopelessly and helplessly and suddenly noticed the Koranic scriptures all around the walls like a magic and showed them to him but he never ever accepted his mistake and just ignored everything! Sok halindeyken umutsuz ve caresizce duvarlara bakmaya basladim ve ansizin bir buyu gibi restoranin butun duvarlarini susleyen Kuran yazilarini farkettim ve hemen babama gosterdim fakat babam hicbir zaman hatasini kabul etmedi ve herseyi gormezden geldi. Those Koranic scriptures were exactly same ones inside vilage mosque in Kuyumcullu. Bu Kuran yazilari Kuyumculu’daki koy camisinin icindeki Kuran yazilarinin birebir aynisiydi.

Of course, my father refused to help me move out from terrible Cebeci Student dormitory. Tabi, babam berbat Cebeci ogrenci yurdundan cikip kurtulmama yardim etmedi.

Because my brother Sezai argued as usual on the Kuyumcullu Solidarity Facebook page that he always helped me now l am obliged to tell you a few incidences about him. Kardesim Sezai Facebooktaki Kuyumcullu Dayanisma sayfasinda bana hep yardim ettigimi soyleyip beni yalancilikla sucladigi icin onunla ilgili birkac olayi anlatmam sart oldu.

First incident was during winter semester break in my second year in my college. Ilk olay Siyasal’da ikinci sinifta kis ayindaki somestir tatilinde oldu. I met two Dutch students in my college who like to see my village. Siyasal’da tanisip arkadas oldugum iki Hollandali ogrenci koyumuzu gormek istediler. We stayed in sister Nezahat Iskender’s husband Resat Iskender’ house in Salikkaya only one night when my brother Sezai Iskender tried to rape me while I was sleeping. Salikkaya’da enistem ablam Nezahat Iskender’in kocasi enistem Resat Iskender’in evinde kaldigimiz tek bir gecede kardesim Sezai Iskender bana zorla tecavuz etmeye calisti. I had to fight him to stop and stayed awake until morning. Sezaiyi durdurmak icin onunla dovusmek ve sabaha kadar uykusuz beklemek zorunda kaldim.

Second incident was when l finished the second year in my college my brother Sezai Iskender wanted to come with me to see Istanbul in the summer time but he disappeared in the morning of the first day while I was making bus boy interview in the Gran Bazaar without any word, complaint or any message therefore l desperately had call to Kuyumcullu to find out if he was ok. Ikinci olay, ikinci sinifi bitirince yazin kardesim Sezai Iskender benimle gelip Istanbulu gormek istedi ancak birinci gunu sabahleyin ben Kapali Carsidaki restoranda komilik icin is gorusmesmesi yaparken tek bir soz veya sikayet etmeden ve hicbir mesaj birakmadan yanimdan kayboldu ve durumunu ogrenmek icin caresiz vaziyette Kuyumculluyu arayip durdum.

Later on I learned that Sezai just used me to visit the public brothels by pretending he wanted to live in Istanbul with me. Daha sonra Sezai’nin sadece geneleve gidebilmek icin yalandan benle Istanbul’da durmak istiyormus gibi yaptigini ogrendim.

Third situation was during my career before my military service when brother Sezai Iskender finished his 2 years military service. Ikinci olay ben askere gitmeden once
Disisleri’nde calisirken kardesim Sezai Iskender doguda iki yil suren askerligini bitirdigi zaman oldu. Because I had real hard time from my father to survive I could not visit Sezai so l wrote and called Sezai to stop in Ankara on his way home and he agreed to stay a few days as my guest in the same Grads Guesthouse but he never showed up in the Ankara Main Bus Terminal and wasted all my day and called or wrote for any apology ! Babamin yarattigi sikinti yuzunden ben Sezai’yi ziyarete gidemedigim icin mektupla ve telefonla haberlesip Sezai’nin eve giderken yolunun izerinde olan Ankarada durup benim misafirim olarak Mulkiyeliler Misafirhansinde birkac gun yanimda kalmasi icin kendisiyle anlastim fakat Sezai Ankara Otobus Terminalinde hic gorunmedi ve butun gun beni bosuna bekletti ve hicbir zaman bir telefonla veya mektupla ozur aciklamasi yapmadi.

I think he changed his mind thinking that l still live in my decrepit slum room or decrepit swimming pool change room. Sanirim hala gozleriyle gordugu berbat gecekondu
odasinda veya berbat yuzme havuzu soyunma odasinda kaldigimi dusunup dusuncesini degistirdi. Or he just did not want to waste his time with a poor diplomat brother. Veya yoksul diplomat abisiyle zamanini heba etmek istemedi.

My brother Sezai refused to support my justice struggle against Foreign Ministry from the beginning and brainwashed my family against my struggle in collaboration with my father and in order to dismiss me he advised me to ask help from a mafia boss living in neighboring Kirazli village. Kardesim Sezai en basindan beri Disisleri’ne karsi hak arama mucadeleme yardim etmeyi reddetmis ve babamla beraber olarak ailemin de mucadeleme karsi beynini yikamis ve Kirazli’da oturan bir mafya babasindan yardim istememi onererek beni basindan atmistir.

Sezai always refused from the beginning to help me getting to Denmark and advised me to find a way on my own to go abroad in order to fight better for justice. Sezai daha iyi hak arama mucadelesi icin kendi oturdugu Danimarka’ya gitmek icin bana. Yardim etmeyi en basindan beri reddetti ve yurt disina kendi kendime cikmami onerdi. Sezai bought my plane ticket to Denmark only after I embarrassed him with 3 marches lasting all summer from our village to Ankara during which he never contacted me. Sezai butun yaz boyunca suren koyumuzden Ankaraya dogru uc yuruyusum sirasinda beni hic aramamis ve asla destek vermemistir ancak en sonunda onu utandirdiktan sonra Danimarka’ya ucak biletimi almistir. Nobody ever shamed Sezai for 11 years since 1989 till 2000. 1989 yilindan 2000 yilina kadar Sezai’yi 11 yil hic utandiran olmamistir.

Sezai excluded me from family land sharing and other rights but picked a fight on his own with my aunt Ayse’s son Vahdet Unal excluding me totally from this fight and its background. Sezai beni ailemizin yerlerinin paylasimindan ve baska kardeslik haklarindan tamamen dislamis ayrica arasindaki bu olaylardan ve evveliyatindan beni tamamen dislayarak Ayse halamin oglu Vahdet Unal ile kendi kendine kavga cikarmistir.

But Sezai got me involved instantly after his fight to use me as his soldier and got almost killed me in the shooting incident in the same night. Fakat Sezai cikarttigi kavgada beni kendi askeri olarak kullanmak icin kavga biter bitmez beni derhal olayina katmis ve ayni gecede patlayan vurgun olayinda beni nerdeyse vurdurup oldurttu. Afterwards Sezai or my family never called me for almost six years until I divorced. Olaydan sonra Sezai veya ailem beni bosanma olayima kadar tam 6 yil arayip sormadilar. When Sezai called me he accused me for my broken marriage. Sezai aradigi zaman yikilan evliligimin sucunu bana atti. Sezai and my family always backstabbed me in my justice struggle but almost got me killed and then still banned and intimidated me to avoid speaking for peace. Sezai ve ailem hak arama mucadelemde daima beni arkadan bicakladilar fakat beni nerdeyse oldurttuler ve sonra baris konusmami da yasaklayip beni korkuttular.

In another incidence, my brother Sezai organized with my father and other brother to secretly share family land while abandoning me in my justice struggle against Foreign Ministry from the beginning. Baska bir olayda, kardesim Sezai, en basindan beri Disisleri’ne karsi yaptigim hak arama mucadelesinde beni en basindan beri terk edip yalniz birakmis, babam ile oteki kardeslerimi benden gizli orgutleyerek ailemizin yerlerini aralarinda gizlice paylasmistir.

In yet another incidence, My brother Sezai never called me during nearly six years since his shooting incidence but after I left my ex-wife in Ankara he miraculously managed to call my ex-wife from Denmark and then called me to accuse me in my broken marriage on his one sided long distance nosey attitude. Yine baska bir olayda, kardesim Sezai vurgun olayindan sonra yaklasinca 6 yil boyunca beni hic aramadi fakat Ankaradaki eski esimden ayrildiktan sonra mucizevi sekilde eski esime uzak mesafeleri asarak Danimarka’dan telefon acip konusmus ve daha sonra beni arayarak bozulan evliligime burnunu sokarak eski esimin tek tarafli olarak yaptigi suclamalara dayanarak ayrilma sucunu benim ustume atti.

In Denmark , Sezai always humiliated, intimidated and isolated me and delayed his participation in my visa extension meeting there and deliberately brainwashed me with his lies to leave Denmark and go to USA to isolate me from family, community and country. Danimarka’dayken Sezai beni kucuk dusurdu, korkuttu, tecrit etti, vize uzatma gorusmesine gitme tarihini surekli geciktirdi ve ailemden, cevremden ve Turkiyeden beni tecrit etmek icin Danimarka’dan Amerika’ya gecmem icin yalanlariyla beynimi yikadi.

Sezai openly and clearly accused me on Kuyumcullu solidarity Facebook page as a personal failure protecting the 1980 military coup d’états, my family and himself. Sezai Kuyumcullu koyu Facebook sayfasinda acikca ve kesin bir sekilde beni beceriksizlikle ve delilikle suclayarak 1980 askeri darbesini, ailemi ve kendisini korumustur.

Sezai became so spoiled and abusive because of my father’s favoritism. Sezai babamin koruyucu hareketleri yuzunden boylesine simarik ve kotu olmustur.

When I just finished my middle school I was at roof of our house in Salikkaya fixing our tv antenna and I overheard my father speaking with uncle Iskender Iskender outside that he did not want me as his child and did not want me to send me to school anymore but as I was too successful at school he had no choice! Ortaokulu bitirdigim gunlerde Salikkaya’daki evimizde catiya cikip tv anteni ayarlarken babami evin onunde yolda Iskender Iskender amca ile konusurken duydum ve babam amcama beni cocugu olarak istemedigini ve bundan sonra okula da gondermek istemedigini ancak simdiye kadar okulda cok basarili oldugum icin baska caresinin olmadigini soyledi. If I did not get all highest grades from all classes and certificates of merit every year including elementary school my father would never send me to high school. Eger notlarim her yil hepsi pekiyi olmasa ve her yil ilkokul dahil taktirnameler almamis olsam beni asla liseye gondermezdi. Even with all my success my father agreed to send me to high school only because of social pressures from his friends like uncle Iskender Iskender. Butun bu basarima ragmen babam beni liseye yollamaya ancak Iskender amca gibi arkadaslarindan gelen cevre baskisiyla istemiyor istemiye razi oldu.

My father proved that he let me study involuntarily only upon social pressures as he never came to visit me while I was in high school in Haydarpasa and Adapazari and never gave any pocket money at all and refused to give money to my aunt Binnaz for my food claiming it was fancy for him and starved me in college and forced me to work in the night shifts in the hotels.
Babam, Haydarpasa ve Adapazari’nda liseye giderken hicbir zaman yanima gelmedi ve cep harcligi vermedi ve Binnaz halamin istedigi yemek parasini bile fantazi diyerek vermedi ve Siyasal’da beni ac birakti ve beni otellerde gece vardiyasinda calismaya zorladi, boylece beni ancak cevre baskisiyla mecburen okuttugunu ispatladi.

My father also proved he wanted to burn me as he used me as a hitman on my sister, her husband and as rapist on her girl friend by pulling me back from my free boarding high school in Haydarpasa which is best school in the country. Babam beni yakmak istedigini ulkenin en iyi okulu olan Haydarpasa Lisesinde parasiz yatili olarak okurken beni bir tetikci olarak ablami ve kocasini bir tetikci oldurmek ve ablamin kiz arkadasina tecavuz etmek icin okuldan beni aldirtarak ta beni yakmak istedigini ispatlamistir.

If my father cared about my success in the school he should spare me not Sezai and instead prefer my only one year younger brother Sezai who was never good at school. Eger babam benim okuldaki basarima deger verseydi beni okulda birakir ve benden sadece bir has kucuk olan okulda hic iyi olmayan Sezai’yi kayirmamis olsaydi benim yerime onu kullanirdi.

My father also tried jackets, pants and other cloths on me in Ankara and took them for Sezai and left me empty handed when I started my college. Babam Ankara’da benim ustunde ceket, pantolon, vesaire giysileri deneyip aldiktan sonra bunlari Sezai goturdu ve beni boylece Siyasal’a basladigimda eli bos birakmisti.

My father punished me for my hard work while he rewarded Sezai for his laziness. Beni calismam icin cezalandirirken Sezai’yi tembelligi icin odullendirdi. That is the reason why Sezai and other siblings did what they did. Iste bu nedenle Sezai ve oteki kardeslerim ne yaptilarsa bundan yaptilar. From then on Sezai quit calling me “abi” which is respectful addressing to one’s elder brother. Iste bundan sonra Sezai bana saygi ifadesi olan “abi” diye hitap etmeyi birakti. Even worse Sezai started to call me “George” like he calls a dog to show his disrespect after I was fired from the Foreign Ministry in 1989 and did it ever since. Hatta daha da kotusu Disisleri’nden 1989 yilinda atildiktan sonra bana karsi saygisizligini gostermek icin bir kopek ismi cagirir gibi bana “Corc” diye hitap etmeye basladi ve hep bu hitapta israr etti.

If anybody calls his brother like calling a dog to show disrespect do you honestly expect any help from this person? Eger birisi abisine karsi saygisizligini gostermek icin onu bir kopegi cagirir gibi cagirirsa durustce bu kisinin abisine yardim etmesini beklermisiniz?

First my father used me as a hitman then burned my education and provoked and forced me into political struggle against the left again as his hitman and therefore he got me blacklisted and as a result when the military regime oppressed me he with Sezai and brothers backstabbed me while using my hitman money to burn forests to make land. Ilk once babam beni tetikci olarak kullandi ve sonra egitimimi yakti ve sola karsi beni kiskirtti ve zorla siyasi mucadeleye sokup beni yine tetikcisi olarak kullandi ve boylece beni fisletip mimletti ve sonucta askeri rejim bana zulum ettigi zaman Sezai ve kardeslerimle ile birlikte beni arkadan bicaklarken sirtimdan kazandigi tetikci parasiyla ormanlari yakip yer acti.

While I was oppressed by the never ending 12 September military regime my father and brother Sezai backstabbed me and shared family land and lived like a king by burning forests. Ben asla bitmeyen 12 Eylul askeri rejimi tarafindan omur boyu magdur edilirken babam ve Sezai beni arkadan hancerlediler ve aile yerlerini aralarinda pay ettiler ve ormanlari yakarak krallar gibi yasadilar.

My brothers argued that they excluded me from land sharing because I went to school but my education was only possible because I worked very hard to get highest grades while starving. Kardeslerim beni okudugum icin yer paylasmaktan dislandigimi acikladilar fakat benim egitimim ancak acken cok calisarak aldigim yuksek notlarla mumkun olmustur.

My father’s original betrayal campaign of backstabbing me in response to my very hard work under conditions of starvation and misery was doubled by participation of anti-democratic military and civilian regimes, was tripled by participation of my brothers and quadrupled by participation of all my family. Ac perisan vaziyette cok calismamin karsiliginda aslen babamin aleyhime baslattigi arkadan vurup ihanet etme kampanyasi, askeri ve sivil vesayet rejiminin katilimiyla ikiye katlanmis ve buna kardeslerimin katilmasiyla uclenmis ve tum ailemin ve sozde arkadslarin da katilmasiyla dortlenmistir.

My brother Sezai went to Denmark in 1988-1989 after he married with Mercan Karadayi and became good friend with leftist Mustafa Tuylu who tried to shoot me and hit my head from my back and escaped to Denmark in 1980. Kardesim Sezai Mercan Karadayi ile evlenince 1988-1989’da Danimarka’ya gitti ve 1980 yilinda beni arkamdan tabanca ile vurmaya calisan ve ates almayan tabancasini arkamdan kafama vurarak beni yaralayip Danimarka’ya kacan solcu Mustafa Tuylu ile yakin arkadas oldu. Sezai was too fast to forgive and become friends with my attacker who tried to kill me but he never forgives and never wants to make peace with my aunt Ayse’s sons Unal brothers after 22 years. Sezai beni oldurmek isteyen Mustafa’yi affetmek ve barismak icin cok acele etti fakat Ayse halamin ogullari Unal kardesleri 22 yil gecmesine ragmen hala affedip barismak istemiyor.

Sezai became best friends with my attacker who tried to shoot me and injured me but in the same time he organized a family coup d’état against me and secretly shared family land while leaving me helpless in my justice struggle after I was fired by the Foreign Ministry. Sezai beni vurmak isteyip yaralayan adamla cok iyi arkadas oldu sirada bana karsi bir aile ici darbesi yapti ve Disisleri’nden atildigim anda ailemizin yerlerini babam ve kardeslerimle aralarinda gizlice paylasip beni dislayarak beni hak arama mucadelemde caresiz birakti. My brother Sezai backstabbed me first with his secret friendship with my would-be murderer in Denmark then as he saw I was already backstabbed by the Foreign Ministry he backstabbed me with my father and brothers in Kuyumcullu village. Kardesim Sezai benim katilim olacak olan adamla gizli arkadas olarak Danimarka’da beni arkadan vurduktan sonra Disisleri’nin beni arkadan vurdugunu goruyor ve babam ve kardeslerimle beraber Kuyumcullu koyunde aile ici darbe yaparak beni gizli yer paylasimindan atarak yine arkamdan vurdu.

While Sezai secretly became best friend with my would-be murderer leftist Mustafa in Denmark he bragged that he was best gray wolf when we met Pharmacist Yakup Altintas in his new store in Karasu around 1990. Sezai nerdeyse beni katleden solcu Mustafa ile Danimarka’da gizlice cok iyi dost oldugu halde Eczaci Yakup Altintas’in Karasu’da yeni actigi eczanesinde 1990 yili yaz mevsiminde en iyi ulkucu olmakla ovundu. While pharmacist Yakup stated that Sezai was the real gray wolf and I was the fake one Sezai was flying with pleasure. Eczaci Yakup Sezai’nin gercek ulkucu oldugunu benim turkucu oldugumu soylerken Sezai zevkten ucuyordu. Pharmacist Yakup was speaking so just to deny everything while I was backstabbed by the state and my family simultaneously. Eczaci Yakup ben hem devlet hem de ailem tarafindan arkadan hancerlenirken sadece herseyi inkar etmek icin boyle konusuyordu. Yakup who was a gray wolf in the high school already became a supporter for capitalist Primeminister Turgut Ozal at the time. Lisedeyken ulkucu olan Yakup o anda konusurken kapitalist Basbakan Turgut Ozal’in destekciligini yapiyordu. Now same Yakup is supporting ruling AKP. Ayni Yakup iktidar partisi AKP’yi destekliyor. Here: Burda: http://www.sakaryabolgehaber.com/?NetPaper.ANKAmedya=EDITORS&eid=1237895814 ; http://www.karasununsesi.com/haber/4329/ak-partiden-iki-aday-adayi-daha.html

However, social media is rising so powerful and empowering my justice struggle that I already found enough energy with it to last a forever long fight. Ancak sosyal medya oyle cok guclu yukseliyor ve hak arama mucadeleme guc veriyor ki bana ebediyyen surecek bir mucadele icin yetecek gucu verdi bile.

Finally I moved to a room for four people at our Grads Society Guesthouse in Kizilay.
Nihayet Kizilay’daki Mulkiyeliler Birligi Misafirhanesi’nde dort kisilik bir odaya gectim. I was very happy I could move from 15- people stuffy state dormitory room in Cebeci to this room in the Guesthouse in Kizilay. Cebecideki 15 kisilik havasiz devlet yurdundaki
odadan Kizilaydaki bu misafirhanesine odasina gectigim icin cok mutluydum. I stayed there until I went to my mandatory military service. Mecburi askerlik hizmetine gidene kadar burada kaldim.

I started to work as candidate career diplomat in the bilateral cultural relations department of the Foreign Ministry in 22 December 1986 and stayed there until around July 1987 when l left for military service with permission from Ministry. 22 Aralik 1986mtarihinde Disisleri Bakanligi Ikili Kulturel Iliskiler Dairesi’nde aday meslek memuru olarak ise basladim ve 1987 Temmuz ayinda izinli olarak askere gidene kadar burada kaldim.

Head of our department was a strange guy minister Acar Tuzun. Dairemizin Baskani Acar Tuzun isimli acayip bir elciydi. Head of Department Acar Tuzun did not hold the experienced administrative officer even for one day to show me how he did the work and never wanted to train me himself and made me learn everything like a blind man in an aggravating way. Daire Baskani Acar Tuzun isini devraldigim tecrubeli idari memuru bana egitim vermesi icin bir gun bile tutmadigi gibi kendisi de bana hicbirsey gostermek istemedi ve sinir bozucu sekilde bir kor gibi herseyi kendi kendime ogrenmeye mecbur etti.

Of course, deputy general director minister Erdogan Aytun and General Director Ambassador Erdogan Sanalan took this destruction order from Undersecretary Nuzhet Kandemir and Deputy Undersecretary For Administrative Affairs Metin Mekik and Head of Personnel Department Yalcin Oral and ordered Acar Tuzun to destroy my career. Tabi Genel Müdür Buyukelci Erdogan Sanalan and Genel Müdür Yardimcisi Elci Erdogan Aytun bu yoketme emrini yukarda Mustesar Nuzhet Kandemir, Idari Islerden Sorumlu Mustesar Yardimcisi Metin Mekik ve Personel Dairesi Baskani Yalcin Oral’dan alip Acar Tuzun’e aktariyorlardi. Here: Burda: http://www.sabah.com.tr/Yazarlar/uluc/2005/06/30/Yalcin_Oral ; http://www.internethaber.com/emekli-buyukelci-oral-oldu-131622ah.htm ; http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qVL_1KJ8n_M&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DqVL_1KJ8n_M ; http://www.mayadergisi.com/wp-content/themes/NewsDaily/arsiv-files/245metinmekik.pdf ; http://www.mayadergisi.com/dr-oguz-aygun-ile-e-buyukelci-metin-mekiki-kaybettik/ ; http://www.mayadergisi.com/wp-content/themes/NewsDaily/arsiv-files/243metinmekik.pdf

Metin Mekik clearly supports all military coup d’états in his article which proves how his team in the Ministry implemented secret orders from military regime to destroy my life. Metin Mekik makalesinde acikca butun askeri darbeleri destekliyor ki bu onun ekibinin askeri rejimden gelen gizli emirlerle hayatimi nasil mahvettigini ispatliyor. Metin Mekik clearly states that loyalty to Ataturk is loyalty to America! Metin Mekik acik bir sekilde Ataturke baglilik Amerika’ya bagliliktir diyor! Turkish oligarchs are always believe that loyalty to Ataturk is loyalty to America. Turk oligarklari daima Ataturk’e bagliligin Amerika’ya baglilik olduguna inanirlar.

From my entrance until my degradation from career diplomat class and first termination there were 3 constant officials directly responsible from personnel to oppress me, they are Undersecretary Nuzhet Kandemir, Deputy Undersecretary Metin Mekik and Head of Personnel Department Yalcin Oral. Girisimden meslek memurlugu sinifindan tenzil dilmeme ve Disisleri’nden ilk atilmama kadar surekli olarak personel islerimden dogrudan Sorumlu olan uc kisi Mustesar Nuzhet Kandemir, Mustesar Yardimcisi Metin Mekik ve Personel Dairesi Baskani Yalcin Oral’dir. Especially Yalcin Oral is the man who delivered deadly blow to me while he always smiled and talked sweet to me! Ozellikle Yalcin Oral bana daima guler yuzlu ve tatli dilli konusarak oldurucu darbeyi vuran adamdir!

So oligarchs in the Foreign Ministry who destroyed my life following secret orders from the military regime had loyalty both to Ataturk and America. Yani Disislerinde askeri rejimin gizli emirleri uygulayarak hayatimi mahveden oligarklar hem Ataturke hem de Amerika’ya bagliydilar. All governments during my struggle also exhibit same two loyalties. Mucadelem suresindeki butun hukumetler de ayni ikili bagliligi sergilediler.

Today diplomatic and military oligarchs are same people and have exact same two loyalties! Bugun Disisleri ve askeri oligarklar ayni insanlardir ve ayni ikili bagliliga sahiptirler! Turkey’s oligarchs are still loyal to America and this is why they ignore their victims cries and protect coup d’états generals, collaborators, murderers, rapists, torturers, human rights violators. Turkiye’nin egemenleri halen Amerika’ya baglidirlar ve bu yuzden kurbanlarinin feryatlarini onemsemezler ve darbeci generalleri, isbirlikcilerini, katilleri, tecavuzculeri, iskencecileri, insan haklari dusmanlarini korurlar.

One day when l was in my boss Acar Tuzun’s room he picked up his phone he said on the phone to his friend that he crashed to a person with his Mercedes car but it did not matter because the victim was a cross dresser. Birgun amiri olan Acar Tuzun’un odasindayken gelen bir telefona cevap verdi ve telefonda arkadasina bir kaza yaptigini ve Mercedes arabasiyla birisine carptigini ancak onemli birsey olmadigini cunku carptigi kisinin bir travesti oldugunu soyledi. Tuzun showed in his own words that he thought cross dressers did not deserve human treatmen . Tuzun travestilerin insan muamelesini hak etmediklerini dusundugunu kendi sozleriyle gosterdi.

l understood that Acar Tuzun was really a mean guy as one night l met him by chance in front of the door of Ethnography Museum of Ankara for an official invitation and as we both realized we were at the wrong location and agreed that the invitation should be in the other location but he just abandoned me there stranded without even saying goodnight like an enemy by jumping in his Mercedes car. Bir gece resmi davetli olarak gittigim Ankara Etnografya Muzesi’nin kapisinda tesadufen ayni davete gelen amirim Acar Tuzun’le karsilastim ve her ikimizde yanlis addrese geldigimizi ve davetin baska yerde olmasi gerektigini farkedip konustuk ancak Acar Tuzun issiz ve karanlikta iyi geceler bile demeden bir dusman gibi beni oylece orda birakip Mercedesine atlayip cekti gitti.

When l arrived in the invitation later that night Deputy General Director Minister Erdogan Aytun spied on me all night and after the invitation finished he interrogated me about who the peoples I chatted and where l knew them! O gece davetin oldugu yere gidince Genel Müdür Yardimcisi Elci Erdogan Aytun butun gece casus gibi beni izledi ve davet bittikten sonra da konustugum insanlarin kim oldugu ve nerden tanigim seklinde beni sorguladi.

Later on Minister Acar Tuzun was killed in a car crash. Sonradan Acar Tuzun bir trafik kazasinda oldu gitti. But there was strange stuff going on before his death. Fakat olumunden once bazi acayip isler oldu.

My first work was coordinating research permits for foreign researchers in a room right next to Acar Tuzun but in a couple of months as l learned my work they put me alone in another room in an isolated corner of the floor. Bakanliktaki ilk isim yabanci arastirma gorevlilerinin arastirma izinlerini Acar Tuzun’un hemen yanindaki odada koordine etmekti
fakat iki ay icinde isi ogrenince beni dairenin en ucra kosesinde tekbasima bir odaya attilar.

Then they gave me only 3 jobs. Sonra bana sadece uc is verdiler.
They were to get field information reports from related Ministries about horse racing industry and then from hot springs health industries. Bunlar at yarisi ve sifali ilicalar konusunda ilgili bakanliklardan alan bilgilerini almakti. I did ask permission from Acar Tuzun to interview top researchers and top executives in the area and prepared first hand reports myself and we sent them to our embassies.Acar Tuzunden izin alarak bu alanlardaki
en yetkili kitap yazmis ve isin basindaki isimlerle bizzat gorusme yaparak derledigim bilgileri Buyukelciliklere yolladik.

But last one was real difficult one. Fakat en sonuncusu gercekten cok zordu. For months, I was unable to provide Turkish costumes requested by our Washington
embassy for the international costume museum in the USA
. Aylardir, Amerika’daki uluslararasi kostum muzesinin istedigi Turk kostumlerini temin edemiyordum.

http://www.metmuseum.org/about-the-museum/museum-departments/curatorial-departments/the-costume-institute

The offices and agencies like Maturation Institut (Technical High School for girls) and Ministry of Culture that my superiors wanted me to contact with letters and phone calls were no help. Amirlerimin basvurmami istedigi Olgunlasma Enstitusu ve Kultur Bakanligi gibi kurumlar yardim etmiyordu. Our embassy in Washington was pushing for it. Washington Buyukelciligimiz bastiriyordu. We were stuck. Takilip kalmistik. Head of Department Minister Acar Tuzun, General Director Ambassador Erdogan Sanalan and Deputy General Director Minister Erdogan Aytun put the blame on me like I was the failure. Daire Baskani Elci, Acar Tuzun, Genel Müdür Buyukelci Erdogan Sanalan ve Genel Müdür Yardimcisi Elci Erdogan Aytun sanki benim beceriksizligimmis gibi sucu bana yukluyorlardi.

In the meantime Prime Minister Ozal’s wife Semra Ozal was criticized in the press for spending a lot of money for an ottoman style costume ball which drew my attention. Ayni zamanda Semra Ozal’in Osmanli usulu sasaali kiyafet balolari yapmasi basinda elestirildiginden dikkatimi cekmisti. Here: Burada: http://www.farukbildirici.com/index.php?Did=541 I guessed Semra Ozal would be very happy to get rid of her collection of costumes by donating them to our work pursued by our department as state work and I did not fail in my guess but l angered my superiors very much. Semra Ozal’in kostum kollesiyonunu dairemizde devletin takip ettigi bir is icin hediye ederek kurtulmaktan cok mutlu olacagini tahmin ettim ve bu tahminimde yanilmadim ancak amirlerimi cok kizdirdim.

I told Acar Tuzun that l will try to get help from the Foundation of Turkish Women’s Promotion founded and chaired by the Prime Minister Ozal’s wife Semra Ozal. Basbakan Ozal’in esi Semra Ozal’in kurup idare ettigi Turk Kadinlarini Tanitma Vakfi’ndan yardim almaya
calisacagimi soyledim. He did not like it but still had to let me try it as we did not have any alternative solution. Fikri begenmedi ama baska bir alternatif cozum olmadigindan mecburen bana olur dedi.

I called the Foundation and told the managing lady about our costume problem and mentioned a picture on my desk in the Foreign Ministry. Vakfi telefonla aradim ve cikan
bayana kostum sorunumuzu anlattim ve Disisleri Bakanligi’ndaki masamda duran bir resmimden bahsettim. I told her that I had a picture with Ozal in order to get the costumes. Kostumleri alabilmek icin telefondaki bayana Ozallarla beraber bir resmim oldugunu soyledim.

Instantly I had prime minister’s wife Semra Ozal on the phone. Semra Ozal aninda telefonuma cikti. I told Semra Ozal very short stories about the costumes and the picture. Semra Ozal’a kostumlerin ve resmin hikayesini cok kisa anlattim. Semra Ozal was very happy to diffuse her critics while l was very happy to diffuse pressure on me from the hierarchy. Semra Ozal elestirilerden boylece kurtuldugu icin ben de ustumdeki Amir baskisini attigim icin cok mutluyduk.

But my supervisors and the opposition was not so happy to lose their ammunition in their hands. Fakat hem benim ustlerim hem de muhalefet gucleri ellerindeki cephaneyi kaybetmekten o kadar mutlu degillerdi. My superiors were already isolating me alone in a room without any work except this select impossible costumes one to destroy my life according secret blacklisting. Amirlerim gizli fisleme ve mimlemeye gore benim hayatimi mahvetmek icin beni yalniz bir odada bu secilmis imkansiz kostum isi haricinde issiz birakarak tecrit ediyorlardi. My superiors were supposed to serve to the opposition party by hiding this costume request and my secret blacklisting from the Primeminister in order to damage his charisma and my life. Amirlerim muhalefet partisi SHP’ye hizmet etmek icin basbakan Ozal’in karizmasini yikmak ve benim hayatimi mahvetmek icin bu kostum talebi ile benim fislendigimi gizlemeleri gerekiyordu. Suddenly the bird in their cage was flying for its freedom. Aniden kafeste tutmak tuttuklari kus ozgurlugune ucmaya basladi.

The picture in my desk showed me talking with Prime Minister Turgut Ozal and his wife Semra and wife of then State Minister Mesut Yilmaz. Masamdaki resim beni basbakan Turgut Ozal, esi Semra Ozal ve Mesut Yilmaz’in esi Berna Yilmaz ile konusurken gosteriyordu.

It was taken in a break in a theater show titled “Streetcar Named Desire” when I was in third year in college. Siyasal’da ucuncu sinifta iken “Arzu Tramvayi” adli oyunun perde arasinda cekilmisti. I made direct interview with the Prime Minister Ozal during
intermission for my research thesis on “International Terrorism And It’s Effects On International Relations And International Law” which I wrote in English.
“Uluslararasi Terorun
Uluslararasi Iliskiler ve Uluslararasi Hukuk Uzerindeki Etkileri” basligi altinda yaptigim ve lngilizce yazdigim arastirma tezi icin Basbakan Ozal’la oyunun perde arasinda dogrudan mulakat yapmistim.

Prime Minister opposed to my calling murders against Turkish diplomats as “Armenian terrorism”. Basbakan Ozal Turk diplomatlara karsi yapilan cinayetlere “Ermeni Teroru”
dememe karsi cikmisti. He suggested to avoid any ethnic group name for terrorism. Terorizm icin herhangi bir etnik grup adi kullanmaktan sakinmami onerdi.

During my call from my office in the Foreign Ministry, Semra Ozal said to me on the phone that they wil ship the costumes immediately and told me to come over and meet her and her husband Turgut Ozal in the Primeministry residence for signing the picture. Disisleri’ndeki buromdan actigim telefonda Semra Hanim esi Turgut beyle birlikte resme imza atmak icin bana Basbakanlik konutuna gelmemi soyledi.

She said they had a lot of Ottoman style costumes they used in a ball party in Istanbul. Ellerinde, Istanbulda bir baloda kullandiklari Osmanli usulu bircok kostumden olusan bir kolleksiyon oldugunu soyledi. Then suddenly our General Director Sanalan and Deputy General Director Aytun entered in my room like they spied on my phone conversation. Aniden sanki gizlice telefon gorusmemi dinliyorlarmis gibi Genel Müdür Sanalan ve Genel Müdür Yardimcisi Aytun odama girdiler.

They wanted to see the picture. Resmi gormek istediler. I showed the picture and told them what happened. Resmi gosterdim ve olanlari soyledim. They said it is insubordination in the ministry. Bunun bakanlikta itaatsizlik oldugunu anlattilar. They said I should not overstep my superiors and go to Prime Minister. Ustlerimi cigneyip Basbakana gitmemem gerektigini emrettiler. They intimidated me by telling me that this kind of insubordination is very bad habit for a diplomat. Bana bu tur bir itaatsizligin bir diplomat icin cok kotu bir
aliskanlik oldugunu soyleyerek beni korkuttular.

They said if I go I should at least refrain telling anything passed in the ministry and
ask the Prime Minister a position like working in holding companies making much more money.
Bana eger gidersem bile en azindan Disisleri’nde gecenleri Basbakan’a soylemememi ve cok daha fazla para getiren buyuk holdinglerde bana bir is bulmasini Basbakandan istememi
soylediler.

I said it cannot be insubordination because l have no choice as Primeminister’s wife Semra Ozal ordered me to go for a signature and this is following the order not disobeying the order without choice. Basbakanin esi Sema Ozal resmi imzalamak icin bana emir verdiginden emre uymaktan baska bir carem olmadigini bunun da itaatsizlik degil tam tersine caresiz emre itaat oldugunu soyledim.

In the meantime, there was my secret blacklisting order which I never knew, to be implemented by my superiors and now they started a secret campaign. Bu sirada ustlerim tarafindan uygulanan ancak benim hic bilmeigim bana karsi gizli mimleme emri
vardi ve boylece bana karsi gizli bir kampanya baslattilar. All my superiors intimidated me not to tell anything to Ozals about my isolation and tension on me from them. Butun amirlerim bana uyguladiklari tecrit ve baski konusunda Ozallara hicbir sey soylemem icin beni korkuttular.

I went to Prime Minister Turgut Ozal’s official residence and we had warm conversation with nice tea. Basbakan Turgut Ozal’in resmi konutuna gittim ve guzel bir cay esliginde sicak bir sohbet yaptik. As Ozal asked about my research I told Ozals that l learned a lot in
my college and I really respected it!
Ozal arastirmami sorunca Ozallara Siyasalda cok sey ogrendigimi ve okuluma cok saygi duydugumu anlattim.

They both signed the picture. Her ikisi de resmi imzaladilar. Prime
Minister made a joke about his wife’s signature.
Basbakan Ozal esinin attigi imzayla ilgili bir saka yapti. His joke to his wife Semra was “your signature always has to be bigger than mine”. Ozal’in esi Semra hanima yaptigi saka “senin imzanin her zaman benimkinden buyuk olmasi lazim” seklindeydi.

After this night my superiors debriefed me and kept me totally idle without any work and always advised me like “you are too good for this boring ministry, you should get in a very highly paying very active holding company job”. Bu geceden sonra amirlerim gorusmenin nasil gectigini benden dinlediler ve beni askere gidene kadar tamamen issiz bos olarak biraktilar ve hic durmadan bana “sen bu sikici bakanlik icin cok iyisin, cok paralar veren cok aktif bir holding sirketine girmen lazim” seklinde tavsiyede bulundular.

They isolated me totally and forced me out of my career by isolation and advising me to get a private job until l went to military service. Askere gidene kadar beni tumden tecrit ettiler ve meslegimden atmak icin tecritle ve ozel sektorde ise girme tavsiyesiyle beni manevi olarak zorladilar. Just before several days I was fired several ambassadors and NATO Gladio Undersecretary Tugay Ozceri reminded me these fake good advises. Gorevime son verilmeden bir kac gun once bircok Buyukelci ve NATO Gladyo Mustesari Tugay Ozceri bana bu
sahte iyi ogutleri hatirlatti. They reminded me the proverbial “a trouble is better than thousand advises”. Bir musibet bin nasihattan iyidir” atasozunu bana hatirlattilar.

Meaning l deserved this one trouble which is better than thousand advises because l did not listen to their orders and advises to “avoid the Prime Minister first and find a private job to leave the Foreign Ministry”. Yani “Basbakandan uzak dur ve Disisleri’ni birakip ozel sektorde kendine is bul” emirlerini dinlemedigim icin bu belayi haketmistim ben.

I was isolated and my all life was destroyed by undersecretary Ambassador Nuzhet Kandemir and his team in the Foreign Ministry who showed his real face after he retired and
entered into politics to revive his idol Suleyman Demirel.
Emekliye ayrildiktan sonra gercek yuzunu gosteren ve idolu Suleyman Demirel’i yeniden diriltmek icin siyasete soyunan Mustesar Buyukelci Nuzhet Kandemir ve Disisleri’ndeki ekibi tarafindan tecrit edildim ve tum hayatim mahvedildi. Kandemir’s idol Suleyman Demirel worked for arms dealer Altay group after he returned from USA, he forced Turkey into terror chaos and readied it for 1971 and 1980 coup d’états and 28 February soft coup d’états and was involved in Ozal’s poisoning. Kandemir’in idolu Suleyman Demirel ABD’den donunce silah taciri Altay kollektif şirketi icin calisti, ulkeyi teror kaosuna sokup 1971 ve 1980 ve 24 Subat darbelerine hazirladi ve Ozal’in zehirenerek oldurulmesi olayina karisti.

Insider retired Ambasador Coskun Kirca says father and mother of Nuzhet Kandemir are donmehs from Salonica. Emekli Buyukelci Coskun Kirca icerden birisi olarak Nuzhet Kandemir’in anne ve babasinin Selanikli donme oldugunu anlatiyor. It was documented that Suleyman Demirel is a robber and violent fascist mason who had CIA training in the USA. Suleyman Demirel’in ABD’de CIA egitiminden gecmis soyguncu ve saldirgan fasist bir mason oldugu da belgelenmistir. Here: Burda: http://www.aksiyon.com.tr/aksiyon/haber-7710-34-o-da-asiretten.html; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dönmeh;
http://m.haber7.com/haberDetay.php?id=890234 ; http://www.angelfire.com/hi5/hopegiver/mas2i.html; http://okul.selyam.net/docs/index-19497.html?page=8

While l gave this state opportunity to Turgut and Semra Ozal to turn their politically troubled costumes into a political success they closed their ears to all my calls for help
against destruction to my all life for years.
Ben Turgut and Semra Ozal’a siyaseten sorunlu kostumlerini siyasi basariya cevirmek icin bir devlet imkani sunarken tum hayatimin mahvedilmesine karsi yaptigim yardim cagrilarima yillarca kulaklarini tikadilar.

President Turgut Ozal was poisoned and his wife Semra Ozal is most likely to be prosecuted for it! Cumhurbaskani Turgut Ozal zehirlenerek olduruldu ve karisi Semra Ozal cok muhtemeldir ki bunun icin yargianacak! Here: Burda:

http://www.haberacisi.com/yazilar/haber21007-SEMRA_OZAL_YARGILANACAK_MI.html;

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bmL-2f_27T8&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DbmL-2f_27T8

There is a strange connection between the pressure from the team under donmeh undersecretary Ambassador Nuzhet Kandemir and the pressure from my family that l never realized until now. Donme Buyukelci Nuzhet Kandemir ve altindaki ekibin baskisi ile ailemin yaptigi baski arasinda simdiye kadar hic dikkatimi cekmeyen acayip bir iliski var. My father, grandfather and uncle Yunus ordered me to quit my creme dela creme career diplomat job in the Foreign Ministry and get a simple job. Babam, dedem ve Yunus Iskender amcam Disisleri’ndeki kaymak gibi diplomatik meslek memurlugunu terketmemi ve basit bir ise girmemi emrettiler.

My family starved me all my life but still talked like they cared for me. Butun hayatim boyunca beni ac birakan ailemin bu adamlari yalandan sanki beni dusunuyormus gibi konusuyorlardi. My family argued that my career diplomat job is too stressful while they imposed starvation to death campaign on me. Ailem diplomatik meslek memurlugumun cok stresli oldugunu one surup beni istifaya zorlarken bana karsi acliktan oldurme kapanyasi uyguladi.

Did my family and the Undersecretary Kandemir gang have direct organic connection? Ailemi ve Mustesar Kandemir cetesinin dogrudan organik baglantilari oldu mu? If they had, how? Eger olduysa, nasil?

In the meantime, my secret blacklisting arrived at the Ministry without my slightest feeling. Benim en kucuk bir haberim olmadan mimlenmemi emreden yazi geldi. I learned this fact almost after 12 years. Bu gercegi yaklasik 12 yil sonra ogrendim.

I saw this blacklisting file very unexpectedly in the court against the Ministry. Bu
mimleme dosyasini Disislerine karsi olan davamin goruldugu mahkemede hic ummadigim sekilde gordum. Judge Mehmet Akkaya showed it to me and told me all decisions about me were made based on this secret blacklisting file. Hakim Mehmet Akkaya bu gizli yaziyi bana gosterdi ve benimle ilgili tum kararlarin bu gizli mimleme dosyasina dayanarak yapildigini soyledi.

Judge Mehmet Akkaya said his father is retired General Director of Agricultural Bank Kemal Akkaya. Hakim Mehmet Akkaya babasinin emekli Ziraat Bankasi Genel Muduru Kemal Akkaya oldugunu soyledi. He hid from me that his father Kemal Akkaya was Prime
Minister Turgut Ozal’s favorite State Minister.
Babasi Kemal Akkaya’nin Basbakan Turgut Ozal’in gozdesi bir Devlet Bakani oldugunu benden gizledi.

Strangely as l never forgot his last name Judge Akkaya l googled and found that Judge Mehmet Akkaya is a member of Antalya Regional Administrative Court member now. Hakim Akkaya ismini hic unutmadigim icin Google’dan simdi bakinca Hakim Mehmet Akkaya’nin simdi Antalya Bolge Idare Mahkemesi uyesi oldugunu gordum. I also read that his father fell in prison as he could not pay his debts and his houses were seized for his debts. Babasinin borcunu odeyemeyerek hapislere dustugunu ve evlerine haciz geldigini okudum. Why did not the judge send me to his state minister father to fix this thing from its root? Hakim Akkaya neden beni babasina yollayip bu isi kokunden cozdurmedi? l hope he can answer me? Umarim bana bir cevap verebilir?

Because judge Mehmet Akkaya did not tell me the truth about his father l believe that he hid most of my secret file in the court too. Hakim Mehmet Akkaya’nin babasiyla ilgili gercegi benden sakladigi gibi mahkemedeki gizli dosyamin cogunu da benden sakladigina inaniyorum.

The Foreign Ministry sent me to mandatory military service which lasted 8 months.
Bakanlik beni 8 ay suren mecburi askerlik hizmetine gonderdi. I did my training in the Bilecik Gendarmerie Private Training Garrison. Egitimimi Bilecikteki Jandarma Er Egitim Alayinda yaptim. One day when l was in my downtown permission l helped to a couple of foreign tourists in the main downtown park for some directions and informations about the city and this became the reason for my first jail in my life. Carsidaki Ana parkta bir turist cifte sehrin yollarini tarif edip turistik bilgi vererek yardimci oldum ve bu benim haytimda ilk kez hapse girmemin nedeni oldu.

My superiors said a soldier is not supposed to speak with foreigners. Ustlerim bir askerin yabancilarla konusmasinin yasak oldugunu soylediler. I said l work in the Foreign Ministry as career diplomat and this will be first in the world. Ben Disisleri Bakanliginda meslek memuru oldugumu ve bu cezanin dunyada ilk olacagini soyledim.

While the Turkish state sends people like Demirel, Ecevit and Turkes to CIA training in USA and make them top state officials the same State jailed me as career diplomat for helping
tourists for directions!
Turk devleti bir yandan Demirel, Ecevit ve Turkes gibi insanlari ABD’de CIA egitimlerine gonderirken ayni devlet turistlere yol tarifinde yadimci oldum diye
bir Disisleri meslek memuru olarak beni hapse atti!

Turkish General Staff is controlled by foreigners in NATO but they punished me for just helping needy tourists a few minutes for road direction in my free time. Turk Genel Kurmayi NATO’daki yabancilarin kontrolu altinda ama ayni ordu caresiz turistlere birkac dakika yol tarifi yaptim diye beni cezalandirdi. They are addicted to take NATO orders but punished me for socializing with tourists! NATO emirlerini almaya alismislar ama beni turistlerle konustum diye cezalandirdilar!

I was not even allowed to read foreign papers for the same reasons. Ayni nedenlerle yabanci dil yayinlari okumam da yasakti. Anyway CIA runs our world why do
we need to read anything?
Zaten CIA dunyamizi yonetiyor neden birsey okumamiza gerek olsun ki?

One day the major came to my face in front of everybody in the training field and insulted me like “how much money did you pay to become career diplomat?” Birgun binbasimiz egitim alaninda herkesin ortasinda gelip gelip bana “Dissislerinde meslek memuru olmak icin kac para odedin”
diye hakaret etti. I answered the major like “No Sir Commander, contrary the Foreign Ministry incentived me to enter career diplomat job”. “Tam tersine komutanim Disisleri beni meslek memurluguna gireyim diye tesvik etti” diyerek cevap verdim. Remember retired ambassador Semih Gunver and Prof. Mumtaz Soysal and Prof. Turkaya Ataov were my references and naturally worked for and represented Foreign Ministry and pushed me to join. Buyukelci Semih Gunver, Prof. Mumtaz Soysal ve Prof. Turkaya Ataov tabi ki Disisleri icin calistilar, onu temsil ettiler ve benim referansim oldular ve girmem icin beni iteklediler.

In the oath-taking ceremony everyone’s family was present. Yemin toreninde herkesin ailesi hazirdi. Everyone had their family in the visits. Herkesin ailesi ziyaretlerde hazirdi. I never saw my father in all this military service. Bu askerlik hizmetim boyunca babami hic goremedim. He did not want one hour trip from
Adapazari to Bilecik.
Adapazari’ndan Bilecik’e bir saatlik bir yolculuga gitmek istemedi.

After the oat-taking ceremony there was a rank advancement ceremony. Yemin toreninden sonra rutbe takma toreni oldu. Suddenly captain of my unit told me that even though l earned my sergeant rank with highest grades he will show me some secret file from general commandment in Ankara signed by a general about my rank advancement and he assured me that he regards me like an ambassador and ordered me not to worry about a sergeant rank. Aniden bolugumuzun komutani yuzbasi bana Cavus rutbemi en yuksek dereceyle hakettigimi ancak bana genel komutanliktan general imzasiyla gelen gizli bir dosya
gosterecegini soyledi ve beni bir Buyukelci gibi gordugunu bu yuzden Cavus rutbesini onemsemememi emretti.

Because of his and other officers similar flattering and deceiving talk l could not admit the fact that l am blacklisted by the state! Yuzbasinin ve oteki komutanlarin benzer ovucu ve aldatici konusmalari nedeniyle devletin beni mimledigi gercegini kabullenemedim.

This flattering and deceiving attitude continued when l returned back to Foreign Ministry which prevented me to get necessary precaution for it! Bu ovucu
ve aldatici tavir ben askerden sonra Disisleri’ne donunce de devam ettiginden mimlenmeme karsi gereken tedbiri almami onledi.
Strategy of flattering and isolation was used together to destroy my life by the Foreign Ministry from the beginning. Hayatimi mahvetmek icin Disisleri tarafindan basindan beri ovgu ve tecrit stratejisi birlikte kullanildi.

They repeated none sense like you are too bright for this boring Ministry! Bu sikici Disisleri icin sen cok akillisin gibi bir sacmaligi tekrarlayip durdular. It was childish none sense because If I was so bright then why do not you make me your big boss! Cocukca bir sacmalikti cunku eger o kadar akilliysam neden beni basiniza bas amir yapmiyorsunuz!

lf they did not flatter and deceive me l could easily fix the blacklisting issue with a signature campaign in the national parliament before they trapped me! Eger beni boyle overek ve kandirarak uyutmamis olsalardi ben mecliste bir imza kampanyasiyla onlar beni tuzaga dusurmeden once mimlenme sorunumu rahatca cozerdim!

However as my military service finished I went to Kuyumcullu village to spend 10 days
vacation permitted by the Foreign Ministry.
Askerlik bitince Disisleri’nden 10 gunluk izinle Kuyumcullu koyune geldim. I came across with my maternal aunt Fadime’s son-in-law leftist director of title deeds Enver Salman in Karasu. Karasu’da Tapu Muduru solcu enistem Enver Salman’la tesadufen karsilastim. Enver Salman explained to me that Army General Habil Kucuk was also related to us. Enver Enistem Karaci General Habil Kucuk’un de akrabamiz oldugunu acikladi. Then he took me with General Habil Kucuk together in a car to visit my maternal grand parents in Salikkaya. Enver Enistem Karaci General Habil Kucuk’u de arabaya alarak Salikkaya’daki anneannemi ve dedemi ziyarete goturdu. It was extraordinary trip. Olaganustu bir yolculuktu. Director, Army General and me as diplomat openly supported my grandparents who were always traumatized by my fascist father. Tapu Müdürü, Karaci General ve diplomat olarak ben fasist babam tarafindan daima ezilen anneannemi ve dedemi acikca destekledik.

My leftist relative Salman forgave that l was used as a fascist hitman by my father and chairman Karabulut! Benim solcu enistem Salman babam ve Baskan Karabulut tarafindan fasist tetikci olarak kullanilmis olmami da affetmislerdi!

If l was was not deceived with flattering actions by the captain and other officers and
ambassadors I had so much support like this to smash their blacklisting trap!
Eger yuzbasi, oteki komutanlar ve buyukelciler tarafindan gurur oksayici hareketlerle aldatilmamis olsaydim onlarin mimleme tuzagini parcalayacak bunun gibi cok buyuk destegim vardi.

On the return we stopped to drink tea in the middle of Kuyumcullu village.
Donuste Kuyumcullu koyunun ortasinda cay icmek icin durduk. Everybody was surprised. Herkes cok saskindi. My father, grandfather and uncles saw us too. Babam, Dedem ve amcamlar da bizi gorduler. They realized they are losing their abusive power. Ellerindeki baskici gucun yokolmaya basladigini farkettiler.

They put new tricks on me. Bana karsi yeni hileleri uygulamaya koydular. The same uncaring father who did not take one hour trip to my oat-taking ceremony ordered me to stay in the village for good and not to go back to my job in the Foreign
Ministry.
Bir saatlik yoldaki yemin torenime gelmeyen ilgisiz babam 10 gunluk izni cigneyerek hep koyde kalmami ve Disisleri Bakanligi’ndaki isime donmememi emretti.

He was so trickery that you would think he did this because he really cares for me. O kadar hilekardi ki gercekten beni dusundugu icin bunu yaptigini zannedersiniz. He was not alone in trickery. Hilekarlikta yalniz degildi. Then my father, my grandfather and , my uncle Yunus all tried to convince me to quit my career diplomat position.
Babam, Dedem ve Yunus amcam hep Disisleri’ndeki diplomatlik işini birakmam icin beni ikna etmeye ugrastilar. As if they cared about me if I died from starvation! Sanki acliktan olsem umurlarindaydi!

They argued that I should quit my career diplomat job because they claimed it is extremely risky and stressful and take an easy going simple local job. Diplomatlik isinin
son derece riskli ve stresli oldugunu iddia ederek isimden istifa etmemi ve yakin yerde rahat basit bir ise girip calismami emrettiler. I was surprised to see them pretending they cared for me. Beni dusunuyormus gibi rol yaptiklarini gorunce sasirdim. Honestly l never
thought at that time they said exactly same thing what the Ministry said until l left for military service.
Acikcasi Disisleri’nin askerlik icin ayrilana kadar soylediginin aynisini soylediklerini hic dusunmedim o zaman. Ministry and my family pressured me to quit my diplomatic career almost in the same time! Disisleri ve ailem hemen hemen ayni zamanda diplomatlik meslegimi birakmam icin bana baski yaptilar! Naturally my family was very happy when I was oppressed and fired by the Ministry and always crushed my struggle for justice. Dogal olarak Disisleri tarafindan eziyete ugradigim ve meslegimden atildigim zaman ailem cok mutlu oldu ve hak arama mucadelemi daima yok etmeye calisti.

Ministry strategy after my visit to prime minister ozal was to keep me totally idle and bored and encouraging me with flattery words like “you are too good for this boring ministry, you should find a lucrative and exciting holding job”. Disisleri ben Basbakan Ozal”i konutunda ziyaret ettikten sonra bena hicbir is vermeyerek tamamen bosta birakip yarattigi can sikintisi ortaminda “Recai sen bu can sikici Disisleri icin cok iyisin neden gidip bol parali ve heyecanli
holding isi bulmuyorsun” gibi yagci sozlerle kopartma stratejisini uyguluyordu.

My family also used same deceiving strategy with words like they cared for my happiness and pressured me to quit from so called stressful diplomatic career. Ailem de ayni hilekar stratejisi kullanarak benim mutlulugumu istiyormus gibi yapti ve guya stresli diplomatlik meslegimi birakmam icin bana baski yapti.

I always loved so much my diplomatic career and was always on top of it and never ever thought or said it was stressful even under most terrible pressures in all my life. Diplomatlik meslegimi her zaman cok sevdim ve her zaman meslegimin zirvesindeydim ve butun hayatim boyunca en korkunc baskilara altinda bile meslegimin stresli oldugunu dusunmedim ve soylemedim.

I always fought to get justice for my career when I suffered starvation and did 3 marches and naked actions with chains risking my life and attacks from some media bosses like Ertugrul Ozkok and Reha Muhtar. Aclik cektigim zaman meslegim icin hak arama mucadelesi verdim ve hayatima kastedilmesini ve Ertugrul Ozkok ve Reha Muhtar gibi medya patronlarinin kisilik haklarima onursuzca saldirmasini goze alarak uc yuruyus ve zincirli ciplak hak arama eylemleri yaptim. There was no reason for my family to brainwash me like this against my diplomatic career. Ailemin bu sekilde benim beynimi diplomatlik meslegime karsi yikamasi icin hic bir sebep yoktu. Here: Burda: http://www.medyagundem.com/ertugrul-ozkokun-attigi-silahli-manset-28-subatta/ ; http://www.ensonhaber.com/reha-muhtar-gunah-cikardi-2012-09-09.html

Did my family get money and orders from the Foreign Ministry to get me quit from my diplomatic career? Ailem beni diplomatlik meslegimden kopartmak icin Disisleri’nden para ve emir aldi mi?

My real brothers all argued that my father grabbed money to sell us in the shooting
case.
Ozkardeslerimin hepsi vurgun davasinda babamin para yiyip bizi sattigini cok iddia ettiler. They also argued that uncle Yunus loves to finish such dirty deals. Kardeslerim Yunus amcamin boyle pis isleri bitirmeyi sevdigini de iddia ettiler.

Uncle Yunus was a cop in Istanbul and fired from his job for paying bribe as donation to terrorists while he was gambling in an illegal gambling pit. Yunus amcam Istanbul’da polisti ve kacak bir kahvehanede kumar oynarken teroristlere rusvet gibi yardim parasi verdigi icin isten atilmisti. All his life he provided his family by running illegal gambling houses. Butun hayati boyunca kacak kumarhane isleterek ailesinin gecimini temin etti. My father always praised gambling operators as winners and ridiculed the gamblers as losers. Babam hep kumarhanecileri kazananlar diye ovmus ve kumarbazlari de kaybedenler diye alaya almistir.

Uncle Yunus is the perfect person to broker a deal on us. Bizim ustumuzde anlasma yapacak adam Yunus amcamdir. My father uses uncle Yunus for such dirty deals. Babam Yunus amcami kullanir boyle pis isler icin. My father used uncle Yunus as facilitator when he used me as a stand-by hitman on my sister and her husband and rapist on her girlfriend when I was 15. Babam ablami ve kocasini vurmak icin beni bir tetikci olarak ve ablamin kiz arkadasina bir tecavuzcu olarak kullandigi zaman Yunus amcami yine isbitirici olarak kullanmisti. This is same uncle Yunus who mercilessly took me from my free boarding Haydarpasa high school to my father to finish this hitmanship and rape jobs. Beni bu tetikcilik ve tecavuz isleri icin parasiz yatili olarak okudugum Haydarpasa Lisesi’nden hic acimadan alip babama getiren iste bu Yunus amcamdir.

If they had money and orders from the Ministry who was the contact
person?
Eger Disisleri’nden para ve emir aldiysalar bu baglantiyi kim sagladi?

But I refused their tricky arguments and returned to the Ministry. Onlarin sahte iddialarini reddettim ve Disisleri’ne dondum. However, Fascist Turkish State collaborates with my father in the blacklisting. Ancak fasist Turk Devleti mimlemede babamla isbirligi yapar. State and my father are serving to the same purpose. Devlet ve babam ayni amaca hizmet eder.

They are oppressors. Onlar ezenlerdir. People like me and my mother are the oppressed.Annem ve benim gibi insanlar da ezilenleriz. My father treated my siblings as unwanted step children but pretending he cares for us. Babam oz kardeslerime uvey evlat muamelesi yapmis ama bizi seviyormus gibi rol kesmistir.

This mistreatment was major complaint between my real brothers until my father bought them with secret land sharing without me! Bu kotu muamele sikayeti babam benden gizlice kardeslerime yer dagitip onlari satin alana kadar ozkardeslerim arasinda en buyuk sikayet konusuydu! My father bought them and turned them against me. Babam
kardeslerimi satin aldi ve onlari bana karsi cevirdi. My father used same divide and swallow tactic like state. Babam devlet gibi bol ve yut taktigini uyguladi. State protects the powerful and pretends it cares for the oppressed. Devlet gucluyu korur ve
ezileni de koruyormus gibi rol yapar. So fascist state served to my fascist father by purging me. Fasist devlet beni harcayarak fasist babama hizmet etti. Oppressors protect and support each other! Ezenler birbirini korur ve destekler! This is system of oppressors and it serves only to oppressors! Bu ezenlerin duzenidir ve sadece ezenlere hizmet eder!

After military service the Ministry instantly changed its strategy to hypnotize me with best flattering working conditions and free luxury housing. Askerlik hizmetimden sonra Disisleri ansizin taktik degistirerek beni en gururlandirici calisma kosullari ve bedava luks lojmanla hipnotize etme taktigini uyguladi. Ministry strategy changed from isolation and pressuring me to quit with flattering lies to blinding me with flattering position and free luxury housing! Disisleri stratejisi tecrit ve yalanlarla beni ayrilmaya zorlamaktan gurur oksayici bir gorev ve bedava luks bir lojman vererek beni korlestirmeye donmustu. This blindness filled me with unlimited trust in my superiors motives. Bu korluk bende amirlerimin niyetleri konusunda benim icimi sinirsiz bir guvenle doldurdu.

Due to this false trust I never needed to seek for political support in the national parliament or legal help from lawyers until I was degraded from my career diplomat class! Bu bos guven yuzunden diplomatlik mesleginden cikarilana kadar hicbir sekilde mecliste bir siyasi destek veya avukatlardan bir hukuk yardimi aramadim. There is only one exception to this inaction. Bu hareketsizligimin sadece bir istisnasi oldu. Administrative Attaché Ms. Rukiye Demir was working in our department and got an appointment for me to see lawyer Haluk Oztrak as she knew him. Idari Atese Rukiye Demir dairemizde gorevliydi ve tanidigi icin avukat haluk Oztrak’tan benim icin randevu aldi. I visited attorney Haluk Oztrak a few times but he run me around and never helped me. Avukat Haluk Oztrak’i birkac kez ziyaret ettim fakat beni oyaladi ve asla hicbir yardim etmedi.

Rukiye also sent me to Prof. Ahmet Demir who was working in our college and adviser in the Primeministry. Rukiye beni Siyasal’da hocalik yapan ve bas bakanlikta danisman olan Prof. Ahmet Demir’e yolladi. Demir was a gray wolf and writing to right wing papers and married with Rukiye about time when I was fired. Demir ulkucu idi ve sagci gazetelere yazilar yaziyordu ve benim atildigim zaman Rukiye hanim ile evlendi. Neither leftist attorney Haluk Oztrak nor graywolf Prof. Ahmet Demir pitied and helped in my struggle for justice. Ne solcu avukat Haluk Oztrak ne de ulkucu Ahmet Demir bana aciyip yardim etmedi. Both were known as champions of charity! Her ikisi de yardimseverlik sampiyonu olarak bilinir. http://www.trakyagazetesi.com.tr/gundem/chp-buyuksehire-haluk-oztraki-gostersin-oyum-ak-partinindir-h4207.html ; https://eksisozluk.com/ahmet-demir–453535 ; http://cerideimulkiye.com/?p=11086

Foreign Ministry blacklisted me and illegally degraded my grade from career diplomat to administrative officer. Disisleri Bakanligi beni mimledi ve yasalara aykiri olarak meslek memurlugundan idari sinifa tenzil etti. At that time, the Special Law for the Foreign Ministry permitted degradation of a career diplomat candidate down to administrative officer position only with one condition. O zaman gecerli olan Disisleri Bakanligi Teskilati Kanunu, bir Meslek Memuru Adayi’nin Idari Memurluk kadrosuna dusurulmesine ancak bir sartla izin veriyordu. Only if he/she fails in an evolution at the end of one-year long education in the Foreign Ministry Center for Education. Sadece Disisleri Egitim Merkezi’nde yapilan bir yillik egitim sonunda yapilacak bir degerlendirme sonucundaki basarisizlik durumunda musaade ediyordu.

My degradation was supposedly based on this rule. Benim sinif tenzilim sozde bu kurala dayandirilmisti. However, this evaluation was made after only a total five-month long education in the Center. Ancak, bu degerlendirme, Merkez’de toplam sadece bes ay suren bir egitim sonucunda yapildi. It was not even half of the period required by the Law. Bu da Kanun’un sart kostugu surenin yarisi bile degildi.

My exam papers were also tampered and stolen in the Center. Sinav kagitlarimla oynandi ve Merkez’de kagitlar calindi. Head of Center was Ambassador Huseyin Celem and Deputy Head of the Center was Consul General Reha Parla. Merkez’in baskani Buyukelci Huseyin Celem ve Baskan Yardimcisi Baskonsolos Reha Parla idi. My
various written complaints were made ineffective.
Bircok yazili sikayetim hic dikkate alinmadi.

But soon after Parla committed suicide in his official lodging in the Turkish Consulate
General to which he was assigned.
Ancak kisa sure sonra Parla tayin oldugu Baskonsolosluk’taki resmi ikametgahinda intihar etti. According to press he used his own official handgun in Scopje in Romania. Basina gore Romanya’nin Uskup sehrinde kendisine ait beylik tabancasini kullanmisti.

Ministry pretended his suicide never occurred. Disisleri bu suikast hic olmamis gibi yapti. Ministry also argued it had nothing to do with my grievance. Disisleri,
ayrica bu suikastin benim sikayetimle hicbir ilgisi olmadigini da iddia etti.

However, Consul General Reha Parla’s brother Prof. Taha Parla,is a very good socialist thinker/writer. Ancak, Baskonsolos Reha Parla’nin kardesi Prof. Taha Parla cok iyi bir sosyalist, dusunur/yazardir. Here: Burda: http://urundergisi.com/makaleler.php?ID=1678 I hope Prof. Parla investigates CIA/Gladio Undersecretary Tugay Ozceri and
his brother Reha Parla and all circumstances and enlighten us wth the truth.
Umarim Prof. Parla CIA/Gladyo Mustesari Tugay Ozceri’yi, kardesi Reha Parla’yi ve o zamanki gercekleri arastirir ve bizi aydinlatir. I believe Prof Parla can help for justice. Prof. Parla’nin adalete yardimci olabilecegine inaniyorum.

Capitalist injustice system totally ignored its own law and did not respect its requirement for one year long education in the Center in its decision in my case. Kapitalist Adaletsizlik Sistemi benim davamda kendi Kanunu ve onun geregi olan egitim merkezinde bir yillik egitimin
yapilmadigini hic dikkate almadi. Capitalist injustice system preferred lies of corrupt officials instead of the Law as usual. Kapitalist Adaletsizlik Sistemi her zaman oldugu gibi Kanun yerine yoz burokratlarin sozlerini tercih etti.

I tried to resist against this injustice with petitions. Bu adaletsizlige karsi dilekcelerle direnmeye calistim. I was already in the trap. Coktan tuzaga dusmustum. I said my supposed insult to my high school principle was in fact freedom of expression and universal right of self defense and seeing the Prime Minister Ozal for autographing was also freedom of expression not an insubordination. Lise Müdürü’ne sozde hakaretin ifade ozgurlugu ve evrensel savunma hakki oldugunu ve basbakana imza icin gitmemin de ifade ozgurlugu oldugunu soyledim.

As I started to refer to the Primeminister they disappeared me immediately. Basbakana atifta bulunmaya basladigim icin aninda beni ortadan kaybettiler. Ministry terminated my administrative officer position instantly. Disisleri idari memurluk gorevime derhal son verdi.

The signing Foreign Minister was corrupt Mesut Yilmaz who was convicted for embezzling by the high court. Dosyama imza atan Disisleri Bakani, sonradan Yuksek Mahkeme tarafindan yolsuzluktan mahkum edilen Mesut Yilmaz’di. It was reported that his origin is Armenian but his origin does not matter l wish he was a humane person. Mesut Yilmaz’in Ermeni asilli oldugu bildirildi fakat asli onemli degil keske insan olsaydi. Here: Burda: http://tr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mesut_Yılmaz

Signing Undersecretary was Tugay Ozceri who slaved himself for NATO all his life and was member of freemason illuminati Council on Foreign Relations (CFR). Dosyama imza atan Mustesar da hayati boyunca NATO icin kole gibi calisan dunyayi yoneten karanlik gizli mason efendilerin Dis Ilskiler Konseyi (CFR) uyesi Tugay Ozceri’ydi. Previous undersecretary Nuzhet Kandemir is a donmeh and also a big fan for Freemason Suleyman Demirel. Beni yasadisi olarak meslek sinifindan cikaran onceki Mustesar Nuzhet Kandemir bir donme ve mason Suleyman Demirel’in de buyuk hayrani idi. Here: Burda: http://www.aksiyon.com.tr/aksiyon/haber-7710-34-o-da-asiretten.html

Ozceri was a Bilderberg member like Mesut Yilmaz. Mesut Yilmaz gibi Ozceri de bir Bilderberg uyesidir. Here: Burda: http://blog.milliyet.com.tr/uluslararasi-masonik-zirve–bilderberg-grup/Blog/?BlogNo=405841

Ozceri died from Alzheimer’s disease. Ozceri Alzheimer (erken bunama) hastaligi cekerek oldu. Ozceri as Bilderberg member worked very hard to use Turkey as hitman for USA/NATO invasion in Iraq as Undersecretary. Ozceri, Bilderbergci Mustesar olarak ABD/NATO’nun Irak’i isgali icin Turkiyeyi bir tetikci olarak kullanmak amaciyla butun gucuyle calisti.

These corrupt diplomatic Bilderberg officials twisted my universal petitioning right as illegal leafletting. Bu yoz Bilderbergci Disisleri yetkilileri evrensel dilekce hakkimi yasadisi bildiri dagitmak olarak carpittilar. NATO Gladio Undersecretary Ozceri told me he blacklisted me and yelled to threaten me that he would throw me under the doormat and crush
me there like a bug if I did not stop complaining.
NATO gladyo mustesari Ozceri beni mimledigini soyledi ve sikayetlerimi birakmazsam beni Disisleri’nin kapisindaki paspasin altina atip bocek gibi ezmekle tehdit etti. He showed he is part of CIA/Mafia/Gladio in his obscene threat! Ozceri yaptigi igrenc tehditle CIA/Gladyo/mafya orgutunun bir parcasi oldugunu gosterdi.

He accused me of traveling to Holland for mafia without passport and getting same mafia to shoot him for revenge! Ozceri beni pasaportsuz olarak mafya icin hollandaya seyahat etmekle ve kendisini intikam icin ayni mafyaya vurdurtmak istemekle sucladi! Ozceri expressed insane imaginations like he was a CIA torturer on dope interrogating me! Ozceri sanki kokain muptelasi CIA sorgucusu gibi manyak hayallerle bana iskence yapti.

I told Ozceri that I travelled to Holland when I finished third year in college without passport as a natural reaction to human rights violation of 1980 military regime by denying my natural right of passport. Ozceriye 1980 askeri rejiminin bir insan olarak dogal hakkim olan pasaportumu vermeyi reddetmesine dogal bir tepki olarak Siyasal’da ucuncu sinif sonunda yaz mevsiminde Hollandaya seyahat ettigimi soyleyerek karsilik verdim.

In fact CIA/NATO/Gladio and their puppet regime in Turkey is real mafia and death squads. Gercekte CIA/NATO/Gladyo ve onlarin Turkiyedeki kukla rejimi gercek mafya ve
olum mangalaridir. Undersecretary Ozceri is part of that global Bilderberg illuminati mafia and twisted the fact totally! Mustesar Ozceri o kuresel Bilderbergci illuminati mafyasinin bir parcasiydi ve gercegi tamamen carpitti!

NATO Gladio Undersecretary Ozceri fired me and sent an answer to court that there is no witness statement to the accused illegal leafleting because all of the witnesses were sent to assignment to foreign countries. NATO Gladyocu Mustesar Ozceri beni Bakanliktan atti ve sonra mahkemeye yolladigi cevabinda sozde yasadisi bildiri dagitma sucuma sahit olan memurlardan tanik belgelerinin alinamdigini cunku bu memurlarin yurtdisi gorevlere
atandiklarini one surdu.

This insane coup d’état trial based on this insane answer took more than 2 years in the Turkish military coup d’état injustice system. Bu manyak cevaba dayanan bu manyak askeri darbe Mahkemesi, Askeri Darbe Adaletsizlik Sisteminde iki yildan fazla surdu.

Undersecretary Ozceri spent all his life for NATO as the executive dealing with Gladio. Mustesar Ozceri butun hayatini Gladio ile ilgili NATO yetkilisi olarak harcadi. Gladio is responsible all the cold war, terrorism and coup d’états and death squads around the world under CIA control. Gladyo, CIA’nin kontrolunda dunyadaki soguk savastan, terorizmden ve darbelerden ve olum mangalarindan sorumludur. That is Ozceri as an executive of NATO’s world terrorism tortured me with his insane pressures. Yani dunya terorizminin orgutu olan NATO’nun yetkilisi Ozceri bana manyak baskilariyla iskence etti.

Gladio uses counter guerrillas to incite people against each other to start civil war and then Gladio generals take over the country to exploit it as a happy slave in a quiet marshal
law environment pimping it to global bloodsuckers.
Gladyo kontur gerillalari kullanarak halki birbirine karsi kullanip ic savaş cikartir ve sonra kendine bagladigi generallerle darbe yapar ve sikiyonetimin sessiz ortaminda ulkeyi mutlu bir kole olarak peskes cekip yabanci
kan emicilerle somurur.

Everybody is a pawn for Gladio. Gladyo icin herkes birer piyondur. Everything is to continue imperialism without obstacles. Hersey emperyalizmin engelsiz surmesi icindir. As soon as l was fired by the Foreign Ministry I called my father on the phone for help to fight the injustice. Disisleri’nden atilir atilmaz haksizlikla mucadelemde yardim icin babami telefonla aradim. He clearly and loudly said “they did good to you” on the phone. Telefonda acik ve gur sesle “iyi yaptilar sana”dedi.

He was so mad at my request for legal aid. Avukat destegi istememe cok kizdi.
My father yelled on the phone and ordered me to go back to Kuyumcullu village to burn the forest and uproot the wood and clear hazelnut land. Babam bana telefonda bagirdi ve orman yakmak, agac sokmek ve findik tarlasi acmak icin Kuyumcullu koyune geri donmemi emretti.

When I returned to village he woke me up by kicking me badly in the dawn of morning. Koye dondugum zaman sabahin safaginda beni feci tekmeleyerek uyandirdi. My father yelled at me exactly “get up political science grad, burn some forest, uproot some wood to clear land”. Babam bana aynen “kalk siyasalli, orman yak, kok sok, yer ac” diye bagirdi.

I run outside and joined the villagers’ resistance against construction of vacation housing by state railcar industry on our village beach. Disari kostum ve koyumuzun halkiyla bir olup devlet vagon sanayisi tarafindan koy plajina tatil sitesi yapilmasina karsi baslayan direnise katildim. We were effective. Etkiliydik. Contractors run away with their tents. Insaatcilar cadirlariyla kactilar.

Then gendarmerie came to our village and station commander gendarmerie captain arrested me with 5 others from the tea house for nothing while I was peacefully drinking my tea and chatting with a friend. Sonra jandarmalar geldi ve karakol komutani jandarma yuzbasisi beni bir arkadasimla sessiz bir sekilde cay icerken 5 kisiyle birlikte sebepsiz yere tutukladi.
I was drinking my tea chatting peacefully with a fellow villager on my chair. Sandalyemde cayimi icerek bir koylu arkadasimla sakin bir sekilde sohbet ediyordum.

Captain or soldiers never asked anything to us. Yuzbasi ve askerler bize hicbirsey sormadilar. How did the captain identify me? Yuzbasi beni nerden tespit etti? Who snitched me? Beni kim ispiyonladi?

Obvious suspects are my father and his childhood buddy village headman Talat Naci Aydinoglu. Babam ve cocukluk arkadasi Muhtar Talat Naci Aydinoglu acik supheli.
Village headman Talat cannot do anything against my father and captain cannot take any step without village headman Talat. Muhtar Talat babama karsi hicbirsey yapamaz
ve yuzbasi da Muhtar Talat olmadan adim atamaz.

We stayed in the jail all day without food. Butun gun karakolda ac olarak tutuklu kaldik. After we were released we continued our campaign. Ciktiktan sonra
kampanyamizi surdurduk. We told everyone that village headman Talat took bribe and sold the village beach. Muhtar Talat’in vagon sanayine rusvet karsiligi imzasini atarak plaji sattigini anlattik.

My father threatened me personally for this. Babam sahsen beni bunun icin
tehdit etti. Village headman Talat threatened me by sending his wife as a messanger. Muhtar Talat da esini haberci yollayarak beni tehdit etti. His wife said very bad things will happen to me! Muhtarin karisi bana cok kotu seylerin basima gelecegini soyledi!

The gendarmerie raided the tea houses in the night time imposing some curfew and
fired to the villagers and the provoked villagers fired back too.
Jandarma geceleyin koyu basip kahvelerde oturma yasagi uyguladi ve koylulere otomatik silahla ates acti ve provoke olan bazi koyluler de atesle karsilik verdi. But who snitched that villagers overstayed the set curfew hours? Fakat koylulerin kahvelerin kapanma saatinde hala orda olduklarini jandarmaya kim haber verdi? Usual suspects are my father and his best buddy village headman Talat. Her zamanki supheliler babam ve en yakin arkadasi koy muhtari Talat’tir. They almost cause some horrible deaths! Nerdeyse bazi feci olumlere yol aciyorlardi!

Then I set an observation station in the beach. Sonra plajda bir gozetleme
istasyonu kurdum. All villagers helped me for everything. Butun koylu hersey icin yardimci oldu. They brought big excavator and dug for fresh water.Kepce getirip su cikarmak icin calistilar. We could not find drinkable water but they installed electric lines and brought electric. Icilebilir su bulamadik fakat elektrik hatti cekip elektrik getirdiler.

My village people supported me everyday like this. Her gun beni boyle desteklediler. They made special meals with Turkish dinner party and had me as guest. Ozel yemek daveti duzenleyip beni davet ettiler.

In the meantime we made a signature campaign to promote our beach struggle and I made copies and mailed them to many places. Ayni zamanda plaj mucadelemizi duyurmak icin bir imza kampanyasi yaptik ve ben kendim bunlari Adapazari’nda cogalttim ve bircok yere yolladim.

We also put up very good signs on the windows of some tea houses in the village. Koydeki bazi kahvelerin camlarina da cok guzel yazilar astik.

But one day my father came with his farm tractor and trailer to my station. Fakat birgun babam traktorunu kasasiyla getirdi. He was with my real brother Sezgin Iskender. Ozkardesim Sezgin Iskender ile birlikteydi. They came with handguns in
their belts and they knew l never had guns!
Bellerinde tabancalariyla geldiler ve benim asla silahim olmadigini biliyorlardi!

My father used my brother Sezgin as hitman on me. Babam kardesim Sezgini bana karsi tetikci olarak kullanmisti. Two of them destroyed my beach observation station tent. Ikisi paj gozetleme istasyon cadirimi yiktilar. My father hit me and yelled at me that wood sticks in my tent belonged to him.Babam, cadirimin agac direklerinin kendisine ait oldugunu soyleyip bana bagirdi ve vurdu.

My father who ordered me to burn the forest was so mad at me for using a few wood sticks to protect the beach. Orman yakmami emreden babam plaji kollamak icin bir kac odun parcasi kullanmama cok kizmisti. I feared they wanted to shoot to kill me if l resisted. Eger direnirsem beni vurup oldureceklerinden korktum. I could see their gun on their belt. Bellerindeki tabancalari gorebiliyordum.

My father and brother Sezgin broke my tent therefore l needed a new place. Babam ve kardesim Sezgin cadirimi yiktigindan dolayi simdi yeni bir yere ihtiyacim vardi. Then I entered in the ground floor of the building my father was living. Babamin oturdugu binanin giris katina girdim. It was empty and had broken glass and needed paint. Yer bos, camlari kirik ve boyasi dokuktu. I entered and painted it and began using as my press office for the beach and career diplomat campaign. Buraya girdim ve boyasini yaptim ve burayi plaj kampanyasi ve Disisleri kampanyam icin basin burosu olarak kullanmaya basladim.

Without two days passed my father raided my new office while I was chatting with a fellow villager on my chair. Iki gun gecmeden ben bir koylu arkadasla yeni buromda oturmus konusurken babam baskin yapti. He was so violent and took all the press clippings
and my picture with prime minister Turgut Ozal from the wall and destroyed and
took away pieces.
Cok vahsiydi ve duvardaki tum basin kupurlerimi ve Basbakan Turgut Ozal’la olan resmimi yirtip goturdu. My father ruined my autographed picture with the
Prime Minister.
Babam, Basbakanla imzali resmimi mahvetti. He threatened to shoot me if I do not evict. Bosaltmazsam beni vurmakla tehdit etti.

In that office somebody was already shot by another villager a few years ago. O buroda birisi bir kac sene once zaten bir baska koylu tarafindan vurulmustu.
My father reminded me that murder. Babam bu cinayeti bana hatirlatti. But villagers gave me another place in the next building. Fakat koyluler yan binada bana yer verdiler.

Viiage people also brought me their hazelnuts to sell it for them. Findiklarini da satmam icin bana verdiler. But my father got angrier at me. Fakat babam simdi daha da kizmisti bana. My father, his buddy village headman Talat and the gendarmerie continued to target me. Babam, yakin dostu Muhtar Talat ve Jandarma beni
mimlemeye devam ettiler. All powers blacklisted me. Butun gucler beni mimlediler.

Power centers made me an open target.Guc merkezleri beni acik hedef haline getirdiler. I was blacklisted totally by Grandfather Osman Cavus family, Office
of Village Headman and his deputies and by gendarmerie, and by the Foreign Ministry.
Osman Cavus dedemin ailesi, muhtarlik, azalar, jandarma ve Disisleri tarafindan tumden mimlenmistim.

My brothers already backstabbed me by sharing land with my father in total secrecy. Kardeslerim tamamen gizli bir sekilde babamla aralarinda yer paylasarak zaten
beni arkadan vurmuslardi. Brother Sezgin already acted like my father’s hitman and later defended it to destroy my tent and our resistance in the beach! Kardesim Sezgin
plajdaki cadirimi ve plaj direnisimizi yikarken ve sonradan bunu savunurken babamin tetikcisi gibi hareket etmisti. My family always stood against my justice struggle. Ailem daima hak arama mucadeleme karsi durmustu.

Now l was totally surrounded by all sides. Simdi her tarafimdan tamamen sarilmistim. My participation in the beach struggle angered power centers. Plaj mucadelesine katilmam guc merkezlerini kizdirdi. Their hitman Yellow Mehmet Erturk did not miss the opportunity. Bu guclerin tetikcisi olan Sari Mehmet Erturk firsati kacirmadi. Yellow Mehmet Erturk always lived on drugs and targeted peaceful mellow persons to extract money by threat of murder. Sari Mehmet Ertürk her zaman uyusturucu ile yasamis, bariscil mulayim insanlari olumle tehdit edip paralarini soymustu. Yellow Mehmet was totally corrupt and became tool of the corrupt powers. Sari Mehmet tamamen yozlasmis ve yoz guclerin aleti olmustu.

They brainwashed Yellow Mehmet against me. Bana karsi Sari Mehmetin beynini yikadilar. So Yellow came to my office and was all high and showed his gun in his belt and demanded money. Boylece Sari sarhos halde benim dukkana geldi ve belindeki
tabancasini bana gostererek benden para istedi. I knew the drunk was there to shoot to kill me for an excuse.Sarhosun bir bahane ile beni vurup oldurmek icin geldigini biliyordum.

I had to give him all the money I had to save my life. Canimi kurtarmak icin olan butun parami Sari’ya vermek zorunda kaldim. It was equivalent of two tones of
good hazelnuts.
Iki ton kaliteli findik parasiydi. For some reason I hoped that I could get my money when I come together with my brothers. Nedense, kardeslerimle biraraya gelip parami geri alacagimi umuyordum.

For some reason I forgat that my brothers backstabbed me already and they encouraged Yellow Mehmet the most. Nedense kardeslerimin coktan beni arkadan vurduklarini ve boylece Sari Mehmeti en cok onlarin tesvik ettigini unutmustum. However in a few minutes after Sari walked away I heard gun shots and soon learned that Yellow murdered a
young poor fellow villageman named Kamil working in his own shoe store.
Ancak Sari disari ciktiktan bir kac dakika sonra silah sesleri duydum ve Sari’nin koyde kendi ayakkabi dukkaninda calisan zavalli koylumuz Kamil’i vurup oldurdugunu ogrendim.

Yellow murdered Kamil for money again. Sari Kamil’i yine para icin oldurmustu. He went to jail. Hapse girdi. I went to Yellow’s home for my money.. Parami almak icin Sari’nin evine gittim. I spoke with his mother who is my paternal half aunt Fadime. Sari’nin annesi olan uvey halam Fadime ile konustum. Aunt Fadime said it is up to her husband Mustafa. Halam Mustafa Eniste’ne kalmis bu is dedi. Her husband Mustafa was mad and yelling at me. Mustafa enistem kizgindi ve bana bagiriyordu. Here: Burda:http://www.kuyumculu.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1164 The guy with the crouches in the pictures is Yellow Mehmet Erturk in his father Mustafa’s funeral. Koltuk degnekleriyle resimlerde gorulen kisi babasi Mustafa’nin cenazesine katilan Sari Mehmet Erturk’tur.

He quickly kicked me out of his home. Evinden beni hizla kovdu. I saw Yellow in the teahouse almost 10 years later as he was released from prison. Sari’yi 10 yil sonra cezasi bittince koy kahvesinde gordum. He invited me to sit with him to drink tea. Beni beraber oturup cay icmek icin davet etti. I sat alone saying I am good like
this.
Ben boyle iyiyim deyip yalniz oturdum. I noticed that Yellow lost one of his legs. Sari’nin bacaklarindan birinin olmadigini farkettim.

Later on my brother Sezgin told me Yellow’s own son Taskin Erturk had to shot him in his leg for self defense. Sonra kardesim Sezgin bana Sari’nin oz oglu Taskin Erturk’un mesru mudafaa icin babasi Sari’yi bacagindan vurdugunu soyledi. Then I told my brother Sezgin
about how Yellow robbed my money.
O zaman kardesim Sezgin’e Sari’nin parami nasil soydugunu anlattim.

Sezgin was upset that l did not tell him earlier about this. Sezgin kendisine onceden soylemedigim icin tepkiliydi. My brother Sezgin told me that he won’t let Yellow enjoy my money. Kardesim Sezgin Sari’nin benim paramla keyif surmesine izin vermeyecegini bana soyledi. For some reason l did not tell my brother Sezgin that my brothers’ backstabbing encouraged yellow Mehmet to rob me. Nedense kardesim Sezgine kardeslerimin beni arkadan vurmalarinin Sari Mehmeti tesvik ettigini soylemedim.
I hope he knows he realizes his part in it now. Umarim simdi bu olaydaki rolunun farkina varmistir.

As a victim of violence l needed some time to recover a bit from lifetime traumas. Siddet magduru olarak hayat boyu suren travmalarin etkisinden biraz olsun kurtulmak icin biraz zamana ihtiyacim vardi. I closed my store after Yellow Mehmet robbed my money. Sari Mehmet parami soyunca dukkani kapattim.

While sitting in front of tea house in Kuyumcullu my mufti cousin Rahmi came from Salikkaya with his official Mercedes car right next to me. Kahvenin onunde otururken Muftu Rahmi abi Mercedes makam arabasiyla Salikkaya’dan gelerek tam yanima yanasti.
Mufti cousin Rahmi ordered tea for us and told me that he is the mufti of Kocaali town and Administrator of Kocaali Town offered me a job as substitute English teacher in Kocaali High
School.
Muftu Rahmi abi caylari ismarladi ve kendisinin Kocaali muftusu oldugunu ve Kocaali Kaymakami’nin bana Kocaali Lisesi’nde vekil Ingilizce ogretmenligini teklif ettigini
soyledi.

Corrupt state keeps thousands of full teachers unemployed and wants my free slavery. Yoz devlet binlerce asil ogretmeni issiz tutarken benden bedava kolelik istiyordu. I told so to the mufti. Muftuye bunu soyledim. Mufti promised me that Head of
Kocaali Town will equalize my pay to a full teacher from the poverty funding under his control.
Muftu bana kaymakamin emrindeki Fakir Fukara Fonundan maasimi normal bir
ogretmen maasina denklestirecegine soz verdi. Here: Burda: http://www.egitimsen.org.tr/genel/bizden_detay.php?kod=460#.UrL3w3-9KK0 ; http://devrimciproletarya.info/daha-kac-issiz-ogretmen-intihara-edecek/

Mufti reminded me that he graduated from the Haydarpasa High School and helped me to get registered there. Ayrica kendisi Haydarpasa Parasiz Yatili Lisesi mezunu oldugunu ve benim oraya kaydimi yapmaya yardim ettigini hatirlatti. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haydarpaşa

Also Kocaali was my middle school which I wanted to pay my tribute to. Kocaali Ortaokulu’ndan mezun oldugum icin oraya gonul borcum vardi. I began teaching immediately in Kocaali High School. Kocaali Lisesi’nde ogretmenlige derhal basladim.

Administrator of Kocaali Town also used me as free translator to write for his own official report about his official educational tour in England. Kocaali Kaymakami ayrica lngiltere’de yaptigi stajin resmi raporu icin bana bedavaya tercume yaptirip beni kullandi. This Administrator of Town represents the state perfectly! Bu kaymakam devleti
mukemmelen temsil eder! Both freeloader and plagiarizer! Hem bedavaci hem fikir hirsizi.

Now l also remembered writing English class reports for daughter of Gladio General Orhan Sefa Kilercioglu. Simdi burda Gladyo Generali Orhan Sefa Kilercioglu’nun Amerika’da master yapan kizi icin Ingilizce ders raporu yazdigimi da animsadim. Kilercioglu’s daughter in USA used to fax her papers to get translated by me in Ankara and l used to write her reports. Kilercioglu’nun kizi kagitlarini Amerika’dan Ankara’ya bana tercume icin faksliyor ben de Ingilizce raporlari yazip ona faksliyordum.

Owner couple of the translation company where l worked as translator were from
Konya.
Calistigim tercume burosunun sahibleri kari koca Konyaliydilar. The wife was German translator raised and studied in Germany and husband was receiving True Path political party adviser paychecks from the Ministry of Agriculture for his political
connections.
Hanim Almanyada buyuyup okumus bir Almanca tercumani, kocasi da Tarim Bakanligi’nda Dogru Yol partili danisman olarak maas aliyordu.

They knew each other as the general Orhan Kilercioglu also worked for cruel animal industry.. General Orhan Kiercioglu acimasiz hayvancilik sanayisi icin calistigindan birbirlerini taniyorlardi. I escaped from their sweatshop slave house translation office in one month! Onlarin esir kampi tercume sirketlerinden bir ayda kacip kurtuldum.

Gladio Kilercioglu was responsible for the Taksim massacre and Lockheed Altay scandal and attacking counter guerrilla researcher Talat Turhan in the press. Gladyo Kilercioglu Taksim katliamini yaptiran ve Lockheed Altay skandalina karisan ve kontur gerilla arastirmaci Talat Turhan’a basinda saldiran generaldir. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orhan_Sefa_Kilercioğlu; http://bmajans.blogspot.com/2010/09/tbmm-belgeleri-ile-bir-ucak-rusvet.html l never knew Kilercioglu was such until now. Kilercioglunu bugune kadar boyle bilmiyordum.

Back again to the Administrator of Kocaali Town. Gene Kocaali Kaymakam’ina donelim. Naturally Administrator of Kocaali Town did not keep his promises about equalizing my pay during one term. Tabi, bir donem boyunca Kocaali Kaymakami maasimi denklestirme sozlerini tutmadi.

I was walking from Salikkaya to Kocaali High school everyday back and fort for hours.
Hergun Salikkaya ile Kocaali arasinda saatlerce yayan gidip geliyordum. Administrator of Kocaali Town and Office of Mufti or officials in high school or in board of education or anybody else did not even help me for meals or commuting fee or in any way. Kaymakam, Muftu, lise ve ilce milli egitim yetkilileri veya herhangi bir baskasi hicbir sekilde yemek veya yol parasi vs icin hicbir yardim yapmadi.

All Kocaali people never cared about their English teacher! Tum Kocaali halki Ingilizce ogretmenine hicbir deger vermedi! Everyday I had to walk to pass right in front of Kocaali Police Directorate. Hergun Kocaali Polis Müdürlüğü’nun onunden gecmek zorundaydim. Everyday corrupt cops cut my way and forced me inside the station and
harassed me like “your uncle Yunus Iskender is so great man because he gambles with prosecutor Arif Karabas and high officials and lives a high life and you can never be even close to his greatness and you walk all day like a dog”.
Her gun yoz polisler yolumu cevirip beni karakola cektiler ve “senin Yunus amcan buyuk adam cunku savci Arif Karabas ve yuksek memurlarla kumar oynuyor ve luks hayat yasiyor ve sen onun buyuklugune yaklasamazsin bile, sen ancak hergun kopek gibi boyle yollarda yurursun” diye hakaret ediyorlardi.

l complained these to the mufti, head of Kocaali town and even to the director of police of Sakarya province. Bunlari her gun muftuye, kaymakama ve hatta Sakarya Polis Müdürü’ne sikayet ettim. All in vain. Hersey bosuna. Finally my uncle Yunus Iskender’s gambling partner prosecutor Arif Karabas got me into Karasu prison for 3 days for a false charge coming from my military service as I was blacklisted by the military regime. Sonunda amcamin kumar arkadasi savci Arif Karabas askeri rejim tarafindan fisletip mimlendigim askerlik zamanimdan buldugu uydurma bir dosyayla beni mahkemesiz uc gun hapsettirdi.

Then I complained this prosecuter Karabas to the ministry of justice in Ankara.
Sonra ben bu savciyi Ankara’ya Adalet Bakanligi’na sikayet ettim. Later on I personally went to the Justice Ministry and followed my complaint against this prosecutor.
Daha sonradan sahsen Adalet Bakanligi’na gidip bu savciyla ilgili sikayetimi takip ettim. Fighting injustice got me into more trouble from my uncle Yunus’ gambling partner prosecutor Arif Karabas. Haksizliga karsi mucadelem Yunus amcamin kumar arkadasi Savci Arif Karabas ile basimi daha buyuk belaya soktu.

After all this injustice I quit from the substitute teacher job in Kocaali High School at the end of the school term and began a signature campaign for my career diplomat job.
Butun bu haksizliklardan sonra Kocaali’deki vekil ogretmenlik isini donem sonunda biraktim ve Disisleri meslek memurlugu isim icin imza kampanyasina basladim. I explained the issue to and got the supporting signatures from all assembly and executive committee
members of the ruling Motherland Party in Kocaali and Karasu.
Kocaali ve Karasu ilcelerindeki o zamanki iktidar partisi olan Anavatan Partisi’nin herturlu meclis ve yurutme kurulu uyesine konuyu aciklayip destek imzasi aldim.

I had very supportive high school class mate at that time and he said we should get our candidate elected as head of Karasu Motherland Party district organization. O zaman cok destekleyici Lise’den sinif arkadasim vardi ve kendi adayimizi Anavatan partisi ilce baskani olarak sectirmemiz gerekir dedi. His name is Sefik Kir. Ismi Sefik Kir’dir. As soon as we started to campaign my uncle Yunus Iskender set Pharmacist Adem Kilicaslan as his candidate and started to campaign against us. Biz kampanyaya baslar baslamaz amcam Yunus ta eczaci Adem Kilicaslan’i bize rakip aday cikarip bize karsi kampanyaya basladi.

We worked smart and effective. Akilli ve etkili calistik. Our candidate Tuna Eren who was retired teacher and owner of test preparation school, won, became Karasu district chairman for the ruling Motherland Party. emekli ogretmen ve dersaneye sahibi olan adayimizi Tuna Eren kazandi ve iktidar partisi Anavatan partisinin ilce baskani oldu.
Chairman was a teacher and owner of test preparation school in Karasu. Baskan Karasu’da dersane sahibi bir ogretmendi. Chairman always promised to support my fight against injustice in the Foreign Ministry. Baskan daima Disisleri’nde ugradigim haksizliga karsi mucadelemi destekleme sozu veriyordu. Now we were ready to campaign for my diplomatic career in Ankara. Simdi Ankara’da benim Disisleri meslegim icin kampanyaya hazirdik. Here: Burda: http://www.sondakika.com/haber/haber-ak-parti-karasu-teskilati-partinin-kurucularini-3923017/

But the chairman Tuna Eren suddenly changed his mind and insisted that we go to Ankara with my father. Fakat Baskan aniden fikir degistirdi ve Ankara’ya giderken babami da alma sartini kostu. He knew very well that my father was not into helping me. Babamin beni destekleme yanlisi olmadigini cok iyi biliyordu. Moreover he knew why my uncle Yunus campaigned against us. Dahasi Yunus amcamin neden bize karsi
kampanya yaptigini da biliyordu.

He said he cannot finance a trip for me alone. Yalniz basina bu yolculugun masrafini karsilayamam dedi. He took another ruling party political boss Halit Bayramoglu who also knew well my father was totally against me, from our village Kuyumcullu in his car and we came to our village supposedly to take my father to drive to Ankara. Baskan Kuyumcullu koyunden iktidar partisi Anavatanda siyasi agirligi olan ve babamin bana karsi oldugunu iyi bilen Halit Bayramoglu abiyi de arabaya aldi ve biz guya babami alip Ankara’ya gitmek icin koye geldik.

Once we came to Kuyumcullu, they wanted to stay behind and sent me to get my father
from forest.
Koye varinca carsida kalmak istediler ve ormandan babami almak icin beni yolladilar. I took a long trip to find my father. Babami bulmak icin epey yol gittim. I found him burning forest in Saricaali forest area. Saricaali orman mevkisinde babami orman yakarken buldum.

He was so mad at me I thought he would murder me right there in the forest. Babam bana o kadar kizgindi ki hemen orda ormanda beni vurup oldurecek sandim. He beat me up all the way while coming back to village square. Tum donus yolu boyunca surekli bana sovdu ve vurdu. Finally he met with the chairman and political boss Halit Bayramoglu in the village. Nihayet koye gelince baskan ve partici Halit Bayramoglu
ile konustu.

He said he will not waste any time or money because he does not see any hope in my case. Durumumla ilgili hicbir umut gormedigi icin hicbir zaman ve para harcamayacagini soyledi. He humiliated me as usual by cursing obscenely at me in front of our guest chairman and Halit Bayramoglu. Misafirimiz olan baskanin ve Halit Bayramoglu’nun yaninda her zamanki gibi bana ana avrat soverek beni kucuk dusurdu. He also yelled at me and ordered me to stop wasting anything in my signature campaign. Imza kampanyasi icin de bosuna zaman kaybetmemem icin bagirip emir verdi. I realized that l wasted all my time for this deceitful chairma Tuna Eren. Bu sahtekar baskan Tuna Eren icin bosuna onca zaman harcadigimi farkettim.

I knew I could do it my way much better. Bildigim sekilde cok daha iyi yapacagimi biliyordum. Ruling Motherland party political boss Halit Bayramoglu is our relative and very close business friend of my father. Iktidardaki anavata Partisi’nin siyasi patronu olan Halit Bayramoglu bizim akrabamiz ve babamin cok yakin is arkadasidir. Halit was member of Sakarya provincial general assembly. Halit, Sakarya il Genel meclisi uyesi idi.

He was constantly shuttling to Ankara for political business. Siyasi is icin hic durmadan Ankara’ya gidip geliyordu. Halit explained to me that even though he would love to help me he cannot help me because my father does not want it. Halit bana yardim etmeyi cok istemesine ragmen babam istemedigi icin yardim etmesinin imkansiz
oldugunu acikladi. Otherwise everybody knew he could easily move the mountains! Yoksa herkes onun daglari yerinden oynatabilecegini iyi biliyordu!

I defied my father’s order and blockade and collected all signatures from ruling motherland party officials in its the assemblies and executive committees in Sakarya province. Ben babamin bu emrine ve engeline karsi geldim ve iktidar olan partisi Anavatan Partisi’nin Sakarya Vilayetinde tum meclis ve kurul yetkilileri ile tek tek goruserek imzalarini aldim. All ruling party mayors in the Sakarya province and all members of national parliament representing Sakarya also signed. Vilayetteki butun belediye baskanlari ve Sakarya milletvekilleri de imzaladi. Ruling Motherland Party had Ayhan Reyhan Sakallioglu, Ersin Taranoglu, Mumtaz Ozkok ve Yalcin Kocak in parliament from our province Sakarya. Iktidardaki Anavatan Partisi’nin meclisteki Sakarya milletvekilleri Ayhan Reyhan Sakallioglu, Ersin Taranoglu, Mumtaz Ozkok ve Yalcin Kocak idi. All of them signed to fight injustice and get my career back but none of them informed me about my secret blacklisting and none stayed loyal to his signature and none kept their promise to support me in my justice struggle. Hepsi hak arama mucadelemi desteklemek ve meslegimi geri almak icin imza atti fakat hepsi hakkimdaki gizli fislemeyi benden gizledi ve hicbiri imzasina sadik kalip hak arama mucadeleme verdigi destek sozunu tutmadi.

I went to Ankara with my signatures and continued collecting signatures for my campaign from all motherland party members in the national parliament. Imzalarla Ankara’ya gittim ve kampanyam icin meclisteki oteki Anap milletvekillerinden imza toplamaya basladim.
I got so many signatures that was enough to pass a law but could not reverse injustice in the Foreign Ministry. Kanun cikaracak kadar imza topladim ama Disisleri’nin haksizligini duzeltemedim. Reason for this failure was they all covered up my blacklisting. Bu basarisizligin nedeni hepsinin bir olup fislendigimi benden gizlemeleriydi. Even Interior Minister Mustafa Kalemle signed to support my justice struggle but hid my secret blacklisting. hatta Icisleri Bakani Mustafa Kalemli bile hak arama mucadeleme destek icin imza verdi fakat fisli oldugumu benden gizledi. Kalemli is the only Speaker of Parliament who lost his membership of parliament due to his corruption! Kalemli yolsuzluk yaptigi gerekcesiyle milletvekilligi dusurulen tek Meclis Baskani. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mustafa_Kalemli ; http://arsiv.ntvmsnbc.com/news/106212.asp ; http://www.aksiyon.com.tr/aksiyon/haber-4790-33-20-donem-ruzgar-gibi-gecti.html

I wanted to get signatures from all members of parliament to get justice. Adalet icin Meclisteki butun milletvekillerinin imzasini almak istiyordum. This would be enough signatures to pass constitution! Bu anayasayi degistirecek kadar cok
imza demekti! My campaign scared Foreign Ministry so badly that head of foreign relations committee Bülent Akarcali in the parliament tried to grab my signatures and to beat me and kick me out of parliament. Kampanyam Disisleri Bakanligi’ni cok korkuttu ve meclisteki Disisleri Komisyonu Baskani Bülent Akarcali imzalari elimden zorla cekip calmaya ve beni
dovmeye calisti ve meclisten atmakla tehdit etti. Akarcali protected his leader Mesut Yilmaz who signed to approve my dismissals as Foreign Minister. Akarcali Disisleri’den atilmami bakan olarak imzasiyla onaylayan lideri Mesut Yilmaz’i korudu.

But later he quit his party by criticizing his former leader Mesut Yilmaz. Fakat sonradan eski lideri Mesut Yilmaz’i elestirerek partisinden ayrildi. Akarcali attacked me to gain favor from his leader but he gained nothing from it. Akarcali liderinden menfaatini kapmak icin bana saldirdi fakat bundan bir sey kazanamadi. http://arsiv.zaman.com.tr/2003/04/27/politika/h9.htm ; http://www.radikal.com.tr/politika/bulent_akarcali_akpye_demedigini_birakmamis-917115

After this Akarcali and ruling party motherland officials cut my stay in the state guest Houses and forced me to starve and stop my campaign. Bundan sonra Akarcali ve ktidar partisi anavatan yetkilileri beni kaldigim misafirhaneden cikarttilar ve acliga zorlayip kampanyami durdurdular.

Bulent Akarcali established Turkish Democracy Foundation. Bulent Akarcali Türk Demokrasi Vakfı’ni kurdu. Bülent Akarcalı received $106, 100 from CIA! Bülent Akarcalı CIA’dan 106 bin 100 dolar almis. All this is documented by Turkish General
Staff!
Hersey Genelkurmayca belgelenmis! Here: Burda: https://groups.google.com/forum/m/#!msg/cekirdeks/AtYL6vsyC4o/7mFgv_gL5bQJ

All l needed was food and a place to stay for my campaign. Kampanyam icin sadece yemege ve kalacak yere ihtiyacim vardi. I could collect enough signatures to change the constitution in the parliament. Mecliste Anayasayi degisterecek kadar imza toplayabilirdim. But only if my father and brothers did not backstab me in the land sharing and if this backstabbing did not encourage Yellow Mehmet to rob my money and if those members of parliament backstabbed me too my signature campaign to return to my career diplomat job would be a totally perfect success. Tabiki eger babam ve kardeslerim beni arkadan vurup yer paylasiminda dislamasaydilar veya bu ihanet Sari Mehmet’i parami soymak icin
cesaretlendirmeseydi ve imza veren milletvekilleri beni arkadan vurma sayid Disisleri meslek memurlugu gorevime donus icin imza kampanyam tamamen mukemmel bir basari olacakti. Of course my family was slave to my father like relative Halit Bayramoglu and l never ever saw any help but blockade from my brothers and uncles. Tabi Halit Bayramoglu gibi butun ailem babamin kolesi olmustu ve kardeslerim ve amcamlardan yardim yerine hep engelleme gordum.

While I was in the parliament I met the Primeminister Ozal. Meclisteyken Basbakan Ozal’la karsilastim. He had a security army around him walking in the hall. Etrafindaki koruma ordusu ile salonda yuruyordu. He recognized me and ordered them to allow me to speak with him. Beni tanidi ve konusmam icin beni birakmalarini emretti. I updated him shortly. Gelismeleri kisaca anlattim.

Primeminister Ozal promised to help me but he condemned me to starve and cut my signature campaign in the Parliament. Basbakan Ozal bana yardim sozu verdi ama tam tersine beni Ankara’da acliga ve kampanyami kesmeye mahkum etti. He was the number one betrayer as l trusted only in his solidarity as Prime Minister when his wife Semra ordered me to go for autographing in their residence. Esi Semra bana resmi imzalamak icin ikametgaha gitme emri verdigi zaman ben sadece Basbakanin dayanismasina guvendigimden dolayi Ozal benim icin en buyuk haindir.

He proved that he was a puppet of fascist capitalist imperialism in my case too.
Fasist kapitalist emperyalizmin kuklasi oldugunu benim olayimda da ispatladi. He used and wasted me for his political advertisement from the beginning in the streetcar named desire
show.
Arzu Tramvayi tiyatrosunda en basindan beri beni de siyasi reklami icin kullanip harcadi.

Both Ozal and I were used in the theater of imperialism. Emperyalizmin tiyatrosunda Ozal da ben de kullanildik. He died on his running belt marketing Turkey to imperialists and I may die fighting for justice all my life telling the truth. Ozal Turkiye’yi emperyalistlere pazarlarken kosma bandinda oldu ve ben hayatim boyunca gercegi anlatmak icin mucadele ederken olebilirim.

While Ozal got me thrown out from my career and signature campaign he assigned the first secretary Namik Tan who took part in my dismissals in the personnel department of the ministry me to his office as he bacame President of Turkey. Ozal beni meslegimden ve imza kampanyamdan aittirdi ama benim atilma islerimi Disisleri Personel Dairesi’nde yapan Baskatip Namik Tan’i Cumhurbaskanligi ozel kalemine aldirdi.

Even though Namik Tan wanted to resign a few times complaining from too much work instead of firing him from the diplomatic career on the basis of insufficiency his superior rewarded him by giving him a temporary assignment in our NATO delegation in Brussels so that he can put some money in his pocket and travel but they always tried it cut me off from my diplomatic career with some compasses. Namik Tan cok isten sikayet ederek birkac kez istifa etmek istemesine ragmen amirleri onu yetersizlikten dolayi meslekten atmak yerine tam tersine odul olarak cebine para koysun ve gezsin diye onu gecici gorevle Bruksel’deki NATO delegasyonumuza yolladilar ama her zaman beni diplomatik meslegimden atmak icin komplolar kurdular. Namik Tan is Turkey’s ambassador in Washington who prides himself that his mother’s origin is from thoselonica Donme and father was governor. Turkiye’nin Amerika Buyukelcisi olan Namik Tan anneannesinin Selanikli donme olmasi ve babasinin vali ve Danistay Genel Sekreteri olmasiyla ovunuyor.

As he took part in getting me out of career diplomat class then fired when he was in the personnel department how was I supposed to get justice from the Council of State where his father Mehmet Rami Tan was ruling it as its General Secretary? Beni meslek sinifindan ve Disisleri’nden atan kisinin babasi Mehmet Rami Tan’in Genel Sekreter olarak hukum surdugu Danistay’da bu islemlere karsi nasil bir adalet arayabilirim? Here: Burda: http://www.haberler.com/turkiye-nin-yeni-washington-buyukelcisi-namik-tan-haberi/ ; http://www.milliyet.com.tr/2006/12/13/pazar/axpaz02.html ; http://www.the-american-interest.com/articles/2012/02/13/a-conversation-with-namik-tan/ ; http://arama.hurriyet.com.tr/arsivnewsmobile.aspx?id=7177350

Ozal’s favorite Gladio Undersecretary Tugay Ozceri who threatened and fired me as Undersecretary, lost his memory completely due to Alzheimer disease and died from it. beni tehdit eden ve Disisleri’nden atan Ozal’in gozdesi Mustesar Tugay Ozceri Alzheimer bunaklik hastaligina yakalanip tum hafizasini kaybetti ve bu hastaliktan oldu.

Turkish Injustice System and my family’s backstabbing when l needed most help
encouraged these corrupt officials by delaying to reverse its termination of my position more than two years.
Turk Adaletsizlik Sistemi ve en fazla destege ihtiyacim oldugu anda
ailemin beni arkadan hancerlemesi goreve donusumu iki yildan fazla geciktirerek bu yoz yetkilileri tesvik etti. Military regime as well as massively powerful family relations between the Foreign Ministry and the Council of State like Ambassador Namik Tan on me in personnel department and his father as General Secratery in the Council of State. Buyukelci Namik Tan’in personel Dairesi’nde bana islem yaparken babasinin Danistayda Genel Sekreterlik yapmasi gibi Disisleri ile Danistay arasinda muthis guclu aile iliskileri kadar Askeri Darbe Rejimi etkili rol oynamistir. Military Coup d’états Regime was based on security investigation and secret blacklisting. Askeri Darbe Rejimi guvenlik sorusturmasina ve gizli fislemeye dayaniyordu.

Due to these incentives the Ministry always oppressed me and fired me 6 times in 12 year-long period. Bu tesviklerden dolayi Disisleri 12 yillik surede beni surekli ezdi ve tam 6 kere gorevime son verdi. My colleagues and ambassadors agreed on that my lack of financial backing is major factor in this aggression on me! Meslektaslarim ve buyukelciler mali destekten yoksun olmamin bana yapilan bu eziyette en buyuk etken oldugunda hemfikirdiler.

It is exactly same backstabbing from my family which made Yellow Mehmet almost killed and actually robbed me in Kuyumcullu. Bu aynen ailemin beni arkadan hancerleyerek beni Sari Mehmete soydurmasi ve nerdeyse oldurtmesi gibidir.

Capitalist Injustice System and Foreign Ministry together broke a world record by keeping me as candidate for 12 years. Kapitalist Adaletsizlik Sistemi ve Disisleri beraberce beni tam 12 yil aday olarak tutarak bir dunya rekoru kirdilar. They both decided that my candidacy might last to my retirement. Hatta herikisi de adayligimin emekliligime kadar uzayabilecegini yazili olarak kararlastirdilar.

In this long struggle all of my family refused to back me up, not even a slight argument to support me! Bu uzun mucadelemde butun ailem bana destek olmayi reddetti, hatta beni desteklemek icin en kucuk bir tartisma bile cikmadi!

Finally I saw with my own eyes a secret file to blacklist and purge me everywhere in the State System. En sonunda Devletin her kademesinde beni mimleyen ve harcanmami emreden gizli dosyami kendi gozlerimle gordum. Fascist State blacklisted and purged me as my father wished. Fasist Devlet babamin arzusuna gore beni mimleyip harcadi.

Ministry used many tricks to blind me about my secret blacklisting. Disisleri
mimlendigimi benden gizlemek icin bircok hile uyguladi. Firstly they insisted that if I had any blacklisting issue I would definitely be eliminated during the entrance examinations. Oncelikle, eger mimlenmis olsam giris imtihanlari sirasinda kesinlikle elenmis olacagimda israr ettiler.

However, finally I saw date of original blacklisting communications in the General Directorate of Police in Ankara and Police Directorate of Sakarya Province. Ancak, en
sonunda mimlendigimi bildiren asil yazismalarin tarihini Ankara’da Emniyet Genel Müdürlüğü’nde ve Sakarya Il Emniyet Müdürlüğü’nde gordum. Their date was later than the December
22, 1986 which is when I started to work on payroll as career diplomat candidate in the Foreign Ministry.
Hepsi Disisleri Bakanligi’nda aday meslek memuru olarak maasla calismaya
basladigim 22 Aralik 1986 tarihinden sonraki tarihtir.

They backstabbed me while smiling to my face. Benim yuzume gulerek beni arkamdan vurdular. If they did not hide my blacklisting from me l could get all members of parliament on my side and easily beat this blacklisting insanity. Eger mimlendigimi benden gizlememis olsaydilar meclisteki butun milletvekillerini kendi tarafima alir ve bu mimleme manyakligini rahatca altederdim.

In order to hypnotize me they assigned me in most popular Western European Bilateral Political Affairs Division as the only career diplomat candidate. Benim gozlerimi
baglayabilmek icin beni Bakanligin en gozde dairesi sayilan Bati Avrupa Ikili Siyasi Iliskiler Dairesi’ne tek aday meslek memuru olarak tayin ettiler. I was circulating service notes to all departments almost every other day attending and reporting Western European ambassadors’ meeting in the Ministry. Bati Avrupa ulkeleri buyukelcilerinin Disisleri’nde nerdeyse iki gunde bir yaptiklari toplantilara katiliyor ve toplanti raporlarini yazip servis notu olarak butun
dairelere dagitimini yapiyordum.

They loaded heavy work on me in the department and never gave me a help. Ustume agir calisma yuklediler ve asla hic bir yardim gostermediler.

They also provided me with a luxury three bedroom apartment in Emek right next to the most popular Director of Private Office of the Foreign Minister. Ayrica bakanlikta en gozde makam olan Bakan Ozel Kalem Müdürü’ne kapi komsusu olarak Emek semtinde uc yatak odali luks bir lojmani bana tahsis ettiler.

I was with most senior Turkish and foreign diplomats all day and night. Butun gun ve gece en ust duzey rutbeli Turk ve yabanci diplomatlarla birlikteydim. I was invited to receptions and cocktails almost every night by these ambassadors. Bu buyukelciler
tarafindan nerdeyse her gece resepsiyon ve kokteyllere davet ediliyordum. They intentionally made me feel like I am really loved and significant in the diplomatic community!
Diplomatik camiada cok sevildigim ve onemli oldugum duygusunu bana kasten verdiler! Like nobody else could be found there to share some of my heavy work load! Sanki agir is yukumu paylasacak hic kimse bulunamiyordu! Normally this heavy work load would also cause a resignation most times. Normalde bu asiri calisma yuku cogu kere istifaya neden olur.

When our copier machine was broken mu superior Deputy General Director Minister Ahmet Ermisoglu used to force me to get copies where ever I find them. Dairemizdeki fotokopi makinesi bozuldugu zaman amirim olan a Genel Müdür Yardimcisi Elci Ahmet Ermisoglu nerde fotokopi bulursam ordan cekmem icin beni zorluyordu.

I used to get copies from the Department of Administrative Affairs where employees refused to share it but Ermisoglu still insisted me to use it and ordered me to tell them his order! Idari Isler Dairesindeki fotokopiyi kullaniyordum ama Daire elemanlari benim makinesi kullanmami yasakladilar fakat amirim ermisoglu yine de o yasak makineyi kullanmamda yine israr etti ve emrini de onlara iletmemi emretti. Trusting Ermisoglu’s statement I got caught using it again by someone who yelled and insulted at me and tried to pick a fight with me who happened to be their head of department minister Aydemir Erman. Ermisoglunun ifadesi ne guvenecek makineyi kullanirken yakalandim ve sonradan Daire Baskani Elci Aydemir Erman oldugunu ogrendigim birisi bana bagirip hakaret etmeye ve kavga cikartmaya calisti. This was a set up between Ermisoglu and Erman upon order fro Personnel department to pick a fight and get me fired but I avoided their trap! Bu Personel Dairesinin emrine gore Ermisoglu ile Erman arasinda bir kavga cikarip beni atmak icin bana karsi kurulan bir komploydu fakat onlarin tuzagina dusmedim. Here: Burda: http://www.bizimanadolu.com/haber/101102.htm ; http://www.sosyalistforum.net/52056-post1.html

As ambassador Ahmet Ermisoglu was taking part in the secret setup to destroy my life because I was originally secretly blacklisted as gray wolf he personally took part in a secret psychological operation to organize gray wolves in mosques in Europe under military regime orders. Buyukelci Ahmet Ermisoglu, en basinda gizlice ulkucu olarak fislendigim gerekcesiyle hayatimi mahvetmek icin yapilan gizli komploya katilirken ayni zamanda askeri rejimin emri geregince avrupadaki camilerde ulkuculeri orgutlemek icin yapilan gizli bir psikolojik operasyona katilmis. Total hypocrite! Tam bir ikiyuzlu!

Ambassador Ahmet Ermisoglu was so mean to me that whenever I asked him some information on the matters in my hand he would say “Foreign Ministry is not school and I am not your teacher”! Buyukelci Ahmet Ermisoglu bana karsi oyle kotuydu ki uzerinde calistigim konularla ilgili kendisinden bir bilgi istedigim zaman “Disisleri okul degil ve ben de ogretmen degiim” diyerek beni terslerdi! Ermisoglu and the ministry took part in breaking established law to degrade me from my class and then to fire me just because I was blacklisted and did not have backing. Ermisoglu ve Disisleri yerlesmis kanunlari cigneyerek sadece fisli oldugum ve arkamda guc olmadigi icin beni meslek sinifindan cikartmislar ve sonra da isten attilar.

Their reaction to a new law by ruling party AKP to allow outsiders become top ministry executives is hypocritical! Bunlarin Iktidardaki AKP’nin yeni bir kanunla Bakanlik ust yonetimine disardan atama yapilmasina musaade etmesine karsi gosterdigi tepki ikiyuzludur. They never care about laws and established values in reality. Gercekte onlar kanunlara ve yerlesmis degerlere onem vermezler. Here: Burda: http://t24.com.tr/haber/emekli-buyukelcilerden-yeni-yasaya-tepki-kurumsal-yapi-tahrip-olacak/234826

Another hypocrisy is from my classmate Kerim Uras who is ambassador in Greece. Baska bir ikiyuzuluk de Yunanistan’daki Buyukelci Kerim Uras’tan geldi. Kerim Uras was in the adjacent building of the ministry in Tandogan to do something with his diplomatic passport and saw me while he was walking outside. Kerim Uras diplomatik pasaport islemi icin Disislerinin Tandogandaki ek binasina gelmisti ve disari cikarken beni gordu.

I was right in front of my beat down office room which was formerly drivers’ room. Ben daha once Disisleri sofoleri tarafindan kullanilan odamin tam onundeydim. Uras shortly spoke with me about my justice struggle and told me that the ministry is sexually raping me and advised me to enjoy this rape instead of resisting it!!! Uras hak arama mucadelemle ilgili benimle kisaca konustu ve Disisleri’nin bana cinsel tecavuzde bulundugunu soyledi ve bu tecavuze direnmek yerine bu tecavuzden zevk almami tavsiye etti!!! This was great shock for me. Bu benim icin buyuk bir soktu.

Kerim Uras states that his father was also graduate of our college and worked as career diplomat many years in the Ministry but quit as first secretary in Brussels to marry his British mother and published diplomatic TurkPulse magazine in Ankara all his life. Kerim Uras babasinin da Siyasal mezunu oldugunu ve yillarca meslek memuru olarak Disisleri’nde calistigini fakat Ingiliz uyruklu olan annesi ile evlenebilmek icin Bruksel’de Baskatip olarak gorevliyken Disisleri’ni biraktigini ve omru boyunca diplomatik TurkPulse (Pals okunur) dergisini cikardigini ifade ediyor. Here: Burda: http://kemergazete.com/?page=10&haber_ID=1249

Ambassador Uras prides himself that his late father always continued the tradition of our college in all his life. Buyukelci Uras babasinin mulkiye gelenegini butun hayati boyunca surdurmesiyle guru duyuyor. Our tradition is justice struggle against oppression! Bizim gelenegimiz zulme karsi hak mucadelesidir. If you advise to enjoy the rape like Uras told me as my classmate you actually attack on the justice struggle which is totally against the tradition of our college. bendim. Bir sinif arkadasim olarak Kerim Uras’in bana dedigi gibi Disisleri’nin yaptigi tecavuzden zevk almami tavsiye ederseniz bu tamamen hak arama mucadelesine yani mulkiye gelenegine karsidir. This rape in question is actually implemented by the ministry for the military regime. Burada sozkonusu olan tecavuz gercekte Disisleri tarafindan askeri rejim icin yapilmistir. My college grads should support our tradition of justice struggle against oppressive military generals or oppressive ambassadors. Mulkiye mezunu arkadaslarin baskici generallere ve buyukelcilere karsi hak arama mucadelesi gelenegini desteklemeleri lazim. Here: Burda: http://www.mulkiye.org.tr/index.php?page=sayfa&id=124&tur=5

But my colleague Omer Gucuk who was not from my college, offered support for my justice struggle. Fakat Siyasalli olmayan meslektasim Omer Gucuk hak arama mucadeleme destek teklifinde bulundu. I could never use his support as I lost contact with him after I was fired. Disisleri’nden atildiktan sonra onunla temasimi kaybettigim icin desteginden hicbirzaman yararlanamadim. Here: Burda: http://tunus.be.mfa.gov.tr/AmbassadorsBio.aspx

This was secret plan to hipnotize and trap me off guard! Bu beni hipnotize etmek ve savunmasiz tuzaga dusurmek icin yapilan gizli plandi! So even devil could not imagine I was blacklisted. Artik mimlendigimi seytan bile hayal edemezdi. Of course now they stopped telling me “you are too good for this boring bureaucracy why do not you find a highly paying holding job?”. Tabi artik “bu sikici burokrasi icin sen cok iyisin niye kendine bol parali bir holding isi bulmuyorsun?” demeyi biraktilar.

Of course I am not only blacklisted victim. Tabi ki mimlenen kurban tek ben degilim. Millions of people were blacklisted in Turkey and around the world. Turkiyede ve dunyada milyonlarca insan mimleniyor. Blacklising is a dictatorship
practice and totally a human rights violation.
Mimleme bir diktatorluk uygulamasidir ve tamamen bir insan haklari ihlalidir.

My blacklisting was implemented according to the Turkish constitution which was enacted by the 12 September 1980 Military Coup D’état which is still in power today. Fislenmem 12 Eylul 1980 Askeri Darbesinin koydugu ve bugun hala yururlukte olan Turk Anayasasi’na gore uygulanmaktaydi. 1980 military takeover was product of NATO Gladio like all others. 1980 darbesi de tum digerleri gibi NATO Gladyonun eseriydi.

Coup leader General Evren was commander of Gladio! Darbenin lideri General
Evren Gladyonun komutaniydi! Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kenan_Evren Gladio is waging war of terrorism on unarmed people around the world under CIA control. Gladyo, CIA’nin kontrolu altinda dunyanin heryerinde silahsiz insanlara karsi terorizm savasi uyguluyor.

Finally I saw the secret blacklisting file and spoke against this game. Sonunda mimleme raporunu gordum ve bu oyuna karsi tepki gosterdim. There was no way to continue to play this inhuman game. Bu insanlikdisi oyunu surdurecek bir yol kalmamisti. I knew that legal game was over and political struggle was the only option. Hukuk oyununun bittigini siyasal mucadelenin tek secenek oldugunu biliyordum. I started media campaign about it which ended this crazy legal game. Bu manyak mahkeme
oyununa karsi medya kampanyasi baslatinca bu oyun bitti. Here: Burda: http://arsiv.sabah.com.tr/1998/11/14/y14.html

So this blacklisting file argument became the end of my legal struggle there. Bu mimli dosya tartismasi ordaki mahkeme mucadelemin sonu oldu. It took a long
time for me to realize that I was used as fascist hitman by Gladio grassroots like my own father and MHP Karasu chairman Karabulut and then secretly discarded by the top Gladio official Foreign Ministry Undersecretaries Nuzhet Kandemir and Tugay Ozceri.
Benim icin ozbabam ve MHP Karasu baskani Cevat Karabulut gibi Gladyo’nun yerel fasist uzantilari tarafindan bir fasist tetikci olarak kullanildigimi ve sonra en yuksek Gladyo yetkilisi olan Disisleri Mustesarlari Nuzhet Kandemir ve Tugay Ozceri tarafindan gizlice harcandigimi anlamam epey zaman aldi.

Main reason for this delay is it took long time for me to understand my father and Gladio and it was too hard to accept this bitter truth. Bu gecikmenin belli basli nedeni babamin ve Gladyonun ne oldugunu cok gec anlamam ve bu aci gercegi kabullenmemin cok zor olmasiydi. Backstabbing by my brothers in line with my father and Gladio Undersecretaries Kandemir and Ozceri made this even worse. Kardeslerimin babam ve Gladyo
Mustesarlari Kandemir ve Ozceri ile ayni cizgide beni arkadan vurmalari bunu daha da kotulestirdi.

Alpaslan Turkes was member of CIA-controlled Gladio and leader of the fascist gray wolves in Turkey. Alpaslan Turkes, CIA’nin kontrolundaki Gladyonun uyesi ve fasist ulkucu hareketin lideriyd. Turkes is Gladio. Turkes Gladyodur. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grey_Wolves ; https://eksisozluk.com/ulkucu-komando-egitim-kamplari–1679581?a=nice

Undersecretary Tugay Ozceri was one of the most powerful NATO civilian official and Gladio was his real career. Mustesar Tugay Ozceri NATO’nun en yuksek sivil yetkililerinden birisiydi ve Gladyo onun esas isi idi: Ozceri is gladio. Ozceri Gladyodur. Here: Burda: http://www.turktoresi.com/viewtopic.php?f=136&t=7031 Gladio expert Dr. Ataman Aksöyek absolutely proves that Ozceri is the man to ask questions about Gladio! Gladyo uzmani Dr. Ataman Aksoyek, Gladyo
hakkinda soru sorulacak kisinin Ozceri olduguna kesinlikle ispatliyor! Here: Burda: http://haber.sol.org.tr/devlet-ve-siyaset/gladionun-turkiyedeki-macerasi-4-turkiye-ornegi-haberi-71843

Undersecretary Ozceri used me as Gladio top boss like my father did and then threw me under the doormat like my father did. Mustesar Ozceri Gladyo’nun en buyuk patronu olarak babam gibi beni kullandi ve babam gibi beni kaldirip paspasin altina atti. When l was fired by Gladio Ozceri my father said to my face that he was happy to hear that in a clear
and loud way and kicked me in the morning and ordered me “get up political science grad and burn forest and uproot woods”.
Gladyo Ozceri beni attigi zaman babam yuzume karsi
acik ve net “iyi olmus” dedi ve sabahleyin “kalk siyasalli orman yak agac sok” diye bagirip beni tekmelerle uyandirip orman yakip agaclari sokmemi emretti.

My father was so overconfident and violent because my brothers sold me out to my father for some land. Babam kardeslerim beni biraz yer icin kendisine sattiklari icin bu kadar kendine asiri guvenli ve vahsiydi. My father gave some land to all of my five brothers secretly to buy their complicity. Babam kardeslerimi de suc ortagi yapmak
icin besine birden gizlice yer vererek satin almisti. So that they can backstab me together. Boylece hep birlikte beni sirtimdan vurabildiler.

In the meantime, I retained Lawyer Mehmet Rifat Eke to return to the Foreign Ministry. Ayni zamanda Avukat Mehmet Refet Eke’yi Disisleri’ne donmek icin avukat olarak tuttum. I found out that Mehmet Refet Eke was special lawyer for Gladio Alpaslan Turkes and also Deputy General Chairman of Nationalist Action Party. Avukat Mehmet Eke’nin, Gladyo
Alpaslan Turkes’in ozel avukati ve Milliyetci Hareket Partisi’nin genel baskan yardimcisi oldugunu ogrendim.

Special lawyer Mehmet Refet Eke of Gladio Turkes grabbed all of my savings for his fee and condemned me to starve. Gladyo Turkes’in ozel avukati Mehmet Refet Eke butun tasarrufuma ucret olarak el koydu ve beni acliga mahkum etti. Fascist lawyer Eke ridiculed
my situation by ordering me to starve as “from now on when you eat sandwich doner kebab do not drink ayran on the side.”
Fasist avukati Eke, “bundan sonra ekmek arasi doner yerken ayran icmezsin” diye beni acliga mahkum eden emrini verirken durumumla alay etti. He knew I was gray wolf too. Benim de ulkucu oldugumu biliyordu.

While my mother is sick and illiterate and my father is totally against me fascist lawyer Eke was bragging that he is general deputy chairman of the Nationalist Action Party and his mother is a judge in Council of State in Ankara and he does not need money and refusing fee offers of millions of dollars. Benim annem hasta ve okuma yazma bile bilmezken ve babam tamamen bana karsi iken fasist avukat Eke annesinin Ankarada Danistay’da hakim oldugunu ve kendisinin paraya ihtiyaci olmadigi icin milyonlarca dolarlik ucretleri elinin tersiyle ittigini ve Miliyetci Hareket Partisi’nde genel baskan yardimcisi oldugunu anlatip ovunuyordu.

One day l accidentally saw my gray wolf friend Harun Alemdar from Kocaali outside in Kizilay square of Ankara and Harun wanted to see this lawyer Eke! Bir gun tesaduf eseri Kocaali’den ulkucu arkadasim Harun Alemdar’i Ankara’nin Kizilay meydaninda gordum ve
Harun bu Avukat Eke’yi gormek istedi.While Eke was bragging same stuff my friend Harun Alemdar interrupted lawyer Eke and asked him why he grabbed my money as l was gray wolf too if he does not need money. Avukati Eke ayni seylerle ovunurken arkadasim Harun Alemdar
lafa girip “madem paraya ihtiyacin yok neden benim ulkucu arkadasimdan para aliyorsun” diye sordu.

Harun Alemdar also asked Eke why he did not take me to leader Turkes to fix it above politically. Harun Alemdar Eke’ye neden beni lider Turkes’ e goturup bu isi siyasi olarak yukardan cozmedigini de sordu. Eke really got mad at Harun and threatened to remove Harun from his chairmanship position in Kocaali. Eke Harun’a cok kizdi ve Harun’u partinin Kocaali baskanligindan atmakla tehdit etti. Eke took my money and never cared for me. Eke parami aldi ve bana asla deger vermedi.

This situation is exactly same when I was abandoned by fascist chairman Cevat Karabulut in Karasu Criminal Court while I was 17. Bu durum, 17 yasimdayken Karasu ceza Mahkemesi’nde Fasist Baskan Cevat Karabulut tarafindan yuzustu yalniz birakilmamla aynidir.

Later, l met Harun Alemdar in Kocaali. Daha sonra Harun Alemdar’i Kocaali’de gordum. Harun said he quit Turkes’ party and added he cannot believe my father is against my justice struggle and he came with me to confront my father. Harun, Turkes’in partisinden ayrildigini ve babamin benim hak arama mucadeleme karsi olmasini
anlamadigini soyledi ve babami ikna etmek icin benimle Kuyumcullu’ya geldi.

Later on Harun confirmed my father will never change. Daha sonra Harun babamin hicbir zaman degismeyecegini teyit etti. Harun Alemdar also said he was in shock that while I was starving my younger brother Tural drives in Luxury car with a lot of money and abusing a young girl in Kocaali angering people in Kocaali. Harun Alemdar, ben ac gezerken kardesim Tural’in luks arabayla ve bol parayla gezmesine ve Kocaali halkini
kizdiracak sekilde Kocaali’de genc bir kizi istismar etmesine de sok oldugunu soylemisti.

There is nothing to add to this because it is normal in the world of my fascist father and my sellout brothers and fascist Gladio Ozceri. Buna eklenecek birsey yok cunku fasist babamin, satilmis kardeslerimin ve fasist Gladyo Ozceri’nin dunyasinda bu normaldir.
My father always tried to block my struggle for justice. Babam hak arama mucadelemi her zaman engellemeye calisti.

He or my brothers never gave any money for a lawyer or legal fee against Gladio Ozceri in my long struggle. Baam veya kardesim Sezai Gladyo Ozceriye karsi uzun suren mucadelemde bir avukat veya yargi harci icin hicbir zaman para vermedi. I repeat again i received no penny from anybody in this long struggle in the courts. Mahkemelerde suren bu uzun mucadelemde hickimseden tek kurus yardim gormedim.

My brothers today accuse me as victim! Kardeslerim bugun bir kurban olarak beni sucluyorlar! Typical fascist solidarity for you. Tipik fasist dayanismasi iste size. My father beat me up and tore down the press clippings reporting my justice
struggle and evicted me from his house.
Babam,evinden beni kovarken hak arama mucadelemi anlatan basin kupurlerini yirtti ve beni dovdu.

First news was in National Press Agency reporting that Foreign Ministry admits there
is no witness statement as they are all abroad!
Ilk kupur, Ulusal Basin Ajansi (UBA) tarafindan yapilan ve Disisleri’nin hicbir tanik ifadesi getiremedigini cunku taniklarin yurtdisinda
oldugunu itiraf eden haberiydi.

Second clipping was from the National Newspaper reporting same news. Ikinci kupur Milli Gazete
tarafindan ayni sekilde yapilan haberdi. Third clipping was Translator Newspaper showing me and stressing that Undersecretary Ozceri is not legitimate undersecretary and his
action is wrong in my case.
Ucuncu kupur Tercuman Gazetesiydi ve beni resimle gosteriyor ve Ozceri’nin makaminda gayrimesru oturdugunu ve beni de kanunsuzca attigini yaziyordu.

Fourth clipping was Dawn Newspaper and showing my picture and saying Ozceri forced a female career diplomat Hande Mumcu to make false charges to involve her Crypto Scandal and sent her to State Security Court. Dorduncu kupur Tan Gazetesiydi ve resmimle beraber Mustesar Ozceri’nin baski yaparak bayan meslek memuru Hande Mumcuya kripto skandalina karistirip Devlet Guvenlik Mahkemesine yolladigini anlatiyordu.

Fifth clipping was Sun Newspaper where I focused on Ozceri’s abuse on career diplomats and demanding more protections for employees against abuses like this. Besinci
kupur Gunes gazetesi idi ve Ozcerinin calisanlari ezdigi konusuna yogunlasiyor ve calisanlarin baskilara karsi korunmasi icin tedbirler alinmasini talep ediyordu.

My father never supported me in my justice struggle and destroyed these original clippings to kill my struggle against Gladio Ozceri! Benim babam hak arama mucadeleme hep karsi cikti ve Gladyo Ozceriye karsi mucadelemi mahvetmek icin bu original kupurleri yok etti.

My brothers sold me out for land to my father and became accomplice in his reckless betrayal. Kardeslerim beni yer icin babama satarak babamin bu manyak ihanetine ortak oldular.

My father ordered me to burn forest and uproot wood and clear hazelnut land while kicking and beating me up during early morning dawn time. Babam, sabah safak vakti beni tekmeyle dovup bagirarak orman yakma ve findik tarlasi acma emri verdi.
During this time, he secretly shared hazelnut land between all my brothers without me so he could use them as his hitmen on me .

Bu sirada, babam bana karsi tetikci olarak kullanabilmek icin benden gizlice tum erkek kardeslerime findik tarlasi paylastirdi. It was so secret that the news took a while to reach me in the same village where l had so many comrades from the beach struggle . Yer paylasma isi o kadar gizliydi ki ayni koy icinde durmama ve plaj mucadelesinden o kadar destekcim olmasina ragmen haberin bana varmasi epey bir zaman aldi.

My father bought loyalty from my five brothers against me. Babam bana karsi
kardeslerimden sadakat satin aldi. He secretly gave them land as bribe to use my brothers as hitmen on me! Kardeslerimi bana karsi tetikci olarak kullanmak icin onlara rusvet olarak gizlice yer verdi! My brothers sold me out for some land and put the blame on me in all oppression on me and cleared Gladio Ozceri and military coup d’états since land sharing. Kardeslerim bir parca yer icin beni sattilar ve yer paylasimindan beri Gladyo Ozceri’yi ve askeri darbeyi temize cikarip yasadigim zulmun sucunu bana yiktilar.

Brother Tural’i and Sezgin together argued that l should know better and avoid political troubles like themselves by refusing my father’s provocations. Kardesim Tural ve Sezgin kendileri gibi daha akilli hareket edip, babamin provakosyonlarini reddederek siyasi sorunlara
dusmemem gerektigini iddia ettiler.

They think nobody will know that they became my father’s thoughtless hitmen to assassinate my body or character like this for land from my father. Babamdan gelen yer icin benim bedenimi veya karakterimi katletmek icin beyinsiz birer tetikci olduklarini hic
kimsenin bilmeyecegini zannediyorlar. Even a while ago my real brother Sezai and half brother Murat protected my father and Gladio Ozceri and insulted me by calling me as lier, insane and incompetent in Kuyumcullu group and on my timeline on Facebook. Hatta gecenlerde ozkardesim Sezai Facebooktaki Kuyumcullu grubunda ve uvey kardesim Murat on my facebook timeline Gladyo Ozceri’yi ve babami koruyarak bana yalanci, deli ve beceriksiz diyerek bana hakaret etti.

Leading actor in the land sharing was my real brother Sezai working in Denmark then who already gone back when l learned. Yer paylasma isinde basi ceken kisi o zaman Danimarka’da isci olan oz kardesim Sezai idi ve ben ogrendigim zaman coktan Danimarka’ya donmustu bile.

My father and step mother brainwashed everybody that he provided me all education and put me in a nice diplomatic career but I screwed it because I was a natural failure or insane like my mother etc. Babam ve uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk beni rahat okuttuklarini ve tatli Disisleri meslegine beni soktuklarini ama benim dogustan beceriksiz veya ozannem gibi deli oldugumu soyleyip herkesin beynini yikadilar.

Real reason is that my brothers backstabbed me as they got land. Gercek
neden kardeslerim yer alinca beni sattilar. They told everybody that as an oppressor l riot to them unjustly despite all their extraordinary favors for me therefore l deserve a good punishment. Bana yaptiklari onca iyilikten sonra benim kendilerine haksizca isyan eden bir zalim oldugumu dolayisiyla cok iyi bir cezayi hakettigim yalanini herkese yutturdular.

In fact this land sharing is best proof that my family burned me hidden from eyes. Gercekte bu yer paylasimi benim ailemin gozlerden sakli bir sekilde beni yaktiginin
en iyi ispatidir.

I could not get back to my career diplomat job because my family sneakily stabbed my back when I needed their support most. Diplomatlik meslegime geri donemedim cunku onlarin destegine en fazla ihtiyacim oldugu anda ailem beni sinsice arkadan hancerledi.

Now my real brother Sezai and half brother Murat publicly accuse me of lying, insanity and natural born incompetency. Simdi oz kardesim Sezai ve uvey kardesim Murat acikca beni yalancilikla, delilikle ve dogustan beceriksizlikle sucluyorlar.

They also accuse me of not giving some favors to them as money and gifts even though they backstabbed me! Ayrica beni arkadan vurduklari halde kendilerine para ve hediye gibi iyiliklerde bulunmamakla da beni sucluyorlar!

They killed my struggle in Turkey by backstabbing me and made me an expelled person so far away from home in America and now accuse me of not seeing my mother for 13 years! Beni arkadan hancerleyerek Turkiyedeki mucadelemi kesintiye soktular ve beni dunyanin
bir ucunda Amerika’ya gonderip surgun yaptilar ve simdi de annemi 13 yil gormemekle sucladilar!

However I listened to my brother Sezai’s advice to “get therapy” and found Dr. Tacco the
therapist dog and started my intensive therapy program.
Kardesim Sezai’nin “tedavi gor” tavsiyesini dinledim ve Dr. Tacco isimli bir terapist kopek buldum ve yogun tedavi programina basladim.

Now I have to see Tacco the Doctor Dog three times a week to heal myself. Artik
Tacco isimli Doktor Kopegi haftada uc gun gormek zorundayim. Doctor Tacco decided that I got massive issues from my suffering under oppression and this is the minimum I should get. Kopek Doctor Tacco zulum altinda cok cektigim icin cok buyuk sorunlarim oldugunu ve minimum uc gun birlikte kendisinden terapi gormek zorunda olduguma karar verdi. I gotta listen to Doctor Tacco’s order! Doktor Tacco’nun emrini dinlemek zorundayim!.

I got a picture with Doctor Tacco showing me in therapy with him. Beni Doktor
Tacco ile terapi esnasinda gosteren bir resmim var. My therapist dog Doctor Tacco is here. Kopek terapistim Doktor Tacco burda. Doctor Tacco : Doktor Tacco: https://www.facebook.com/recai.iskender/posts/405334216238717:0

However after my therapy with Tacco l started to enjoy my writing blacklisted gladio hitman blog much more! Ancak Tacco ile yaptigim terapiden sonra Mimli Gladyo tetikcisi yazimi yazmaktan daha cok tat almaya basladim.

My brother Sezai will be upset to hear that my doctor Tacco ordered to increase my blog writing. Kardesim Sezai doktorum Tacco’nun yazi yazmami artirmam icin doktor emri vermesinden dolayi uzulecek. Doctor Tacco told me that writing is best form of therapy too. Doktor Tacco yazmanin eniyi terapi oldugunu bana anlatti.

I agree that I am totally incapable at backstabbing. Arkadan adam hancerleme konusunda tamamen yeteneksiz oldugumu kabul ediyorum. Backstabbing is totally a Gladio nature like Undersecretary Ozceri and my father and their minions in my family. Arkadan hancerleme Mustesar Ozceri ve babam ve onun ailemin icindeki tetikcileri gibi tamamen Gladyo mizacidir.

I cannot even think anything against solidarity and brotherhood. Dayanisma ve kardeslige aykiri hicbirsey dusunemem bile. I will be considered as insane naturally in
their treacherous Gladio world.
Onlarin Gladyo ihanet dunyasinda ben tabi deli olarak gorunurum.

I had these two brothers in Denmark before I was fired from the Foreign Ministry. Bu iki kardesim Ben daha Bakanliktan atilmadan once Danimarka’daydilar. Half
brother Murat wasted all his money on gambling.
Uvey kardesim Murat butum ayligini kumara harcadi. If Murat could save some money he sent it to other half brother Ozcan
in Turkey.
Eger Murat biraz para biriktirebilse onu da uvey kardesim Ozcan’a yolladi.

Real brother Sezai spent all his money on womanizing like a machine and sent any money he can rob from his poor wife Mercan to my father to burn forest, uproot wood and clear land for hazelnuts. Ozkardesim Sezai butun parasini kadin pesinde harcadi ve karisi Mercandan koparabildigi parayi da orman yakmak, agac sokmek ve findik yeri acmak icin babama gonderdi.

I never received any support in any way from them. Bunlardan hicbir yardim gormedim. If they did not stab me in my back in their secret land sharing this would put me back to my career and l would take care of my family. Yer paylasiminda beni arkadan vurmasalardi benim yerim beni meslegime geri dondurmeye yeterdi ve aileme de bakardim.

For years they blocked me to go to Denmark until I started my marches to Ankara. Ankaraya yurumeye baslayana kadar yillarca benim Danimarka’ya gitmeme engel oldular. Only after my marches to Ankara l put them on shame so they agreed to buy my
tickets.
Sadece onlari Ankara’ya yaptigim yuruyuslerimle utandirmaya basladiktan sonra biletimi almaya razi oldular.

I wish I stayed in Turkey and kept marching and struggling for justice until l die. Keske Turkiye’de kalsaydim ve olene kadar hep yuruyus be hak arama mucadelesi yapsaydim. I wish l stayed in Turkey to resist against oppression instead of keeping quiet in
Denmark or in USA.
Keske Danimarka’da ve ABD’de kalip zulme karsi susmak
yerine Turkiye’de kalip zulme karsi direnseydim yapsaydim.

l wish l never witnessed my insane womanizer brother Sezai and my gambler brother Murat destroy their innocent wives and children. Keske kadin duskunu manyak kardesim
Sezai ve kumarbaz kardesim Murat’i gunahsiz eslerini ve cocuklarini dayak, tehdit, psikolojik iskence ve iftiralarla mahvettiklerine hic sahit olmasaydim. I rather march till my death
than see Grandfather Osman Cavus’ misogynist tradition live with its all horror in Denmark.
Osman Cavus dedemin kadin dusmani geleneginin tum korkunclugu ile Danimarka’da yasadigini gormektense olene kadar yurumeyi tercih ederdim.

I wish l never experienced the suffering when my real brother Sezai trapped me to wait with half brother Murat in his car as he cheated on his angel hearted wife Mercan in Denmark. Keske oz kardesim Sezai’nin Danimarka’da iyilik melegi olan esi Mercan’i aldatmak icin beni uvey kardesim Murat ile arabasinda kandirip zorla alikoymasinin acisini hic yasamasaydim. Sezai cheated me and Murat to drive us to see a nice scenery but left us in his car for a minute but did not return 2 hours while we had no remedy in a remote Danish village! Sezai beni ve Murat’i gezmeye gidelim diyerek kandirip arabasina aldi ve issiz bir danimarka koyune goturup bir dakika da gelirip deyip bizi arabada caresiz iki saat bekletti. Murat told me there that Sezai is notorious womanizer! Murat orda bana Sezai’nin uc kursuna duskun olarak sohretli oldugunu anlatti.

I wish I did not hear half brother Murat telling me “Are not you elder brother for Sezai anymore? Why are not you tell him to stop? Why do not you stop Sezai?” while waiting together Sezai to do his womanization inside a strange housing! Keske arabada Sezai’nin acayip bir evde kadinla birlikte olmasini beklerken uvey kardesim Murat’in bana “Sen Sezai abim icin artik abi degil misin? Niye ona vazgecmesini soylemiyorsun? Sezai’yi niye durdurmuyorsun?” diye sordugunu hic duymasaydim.

My brother Sezai caused angel hearted Mercan’s early death by constantly beating her and oppressing her with his shameless womanization and robbing her money to burn forest and to loanshark to helpless poor people and to use my brothers Tural and Sezgin as his hitmen on those helpless poor people. Kardesim Sezai karisi Mercana karsi alenen utanmadan hergun kadin pesinden kosarak ve Mercan’in parasini zorla alip kadinlarla yiyerek, bu parayi pis tefecilik isinde zavalli caresiz yoksullara karsi kullanarak ve kardeslerim Tural ve Sezgin’i o zavalli yoksul insanlara karsi tetikci gibi kullanmak icin harcayarak ve direnen melek kalpli Mercani aynen babamin anneme yaptigi gibi doverek eze eze oldurdu.

This is grandfather Osman Cavus’ old misogynist, fascist, reactionary tradition. Bu Osman Cavus dedemin kadin dusmani, fasist, geri kafali gelenegidir. This cheating and oppression machine brother Sezai falsely and shamelessly charges me to be lier, insane and loser! Aldatma ve zulum makinesi olan bu kardesim Sezai simdi bana yalanci, deli ve beceriksiz diye iftira atiyor. This champion backstabber brother Sezai supposedly advises me as “you got problems you must see a doctor” because I write my autobiography. Bu arkadan vurma sampiyonu kardesim Sezai bu otobiyografiyi yazdigim icin bana “sorunlarin var doktora git” diye guya akil veriyor! What is better than writing only truth? Sadece gercegi yazmaktan daha iyi olan nedir?

Brother Sezai your mind does reach only that far and you think all people are like you. Kardesim Sezai senin aklin o kadar eriyor milleti de kendin gibi saniyorsun.
Wake up and smell the coffee! Uyan da sabah kahvesinden kokla biraz!. You are so accustomed to backstabbing I am speechless now. Ihanetlere o
kadar alismissiniz ki insanin nutku tutulur yani.

You hurt so many poor people by loansharking as if you need money to survive in Denmark and now in Kuyumcullu. Sanki senin paraya ihtiyacin varmis gibi tefecilik yaparak Danimarka’da ve Kuyumculluda onca insanin canini yaktin. As you are so accustomed to backstab your own brother and twist the truth loansharking fits you perfectly my brother. Kardes vurmaya ve gercegi carpitmaya iyi alistigin icin tefecilik sana yakisir kardesim.

Of course, you learned from my father how to use our brothers as hitmen for your filthy
loansharking work in Kuyumcullu.
Pis tefecilik islerin icin Kuyumcullu’daki kardeslerimizi de tetikci olarak alet etmeyi babamdan ogrendin tabi. My father is just a little empty imitator backstabbing his son and so are you brother Sezai. Babam oglunu arkadan hancerleyen kucuk bos bir taklitci ve Sezai kardesim sen de aynen babam gibisin.

I hope you cease your loansharking oppression before you become like Ford Ahmet Ak in Imdat Erturk’s store. Umidim siz Imdat Erturk’un dukkaninda Ford Ahmet Ak gibi olmadan once tefecilik zulmunden donersiniz. I wish my family fights against oppression instead of backstabbing! Keske ailem arkadan hancerleme yerine zulme karsi mucadele etseydi! Sezai, enough with you now let’s go to my father. Sezai, simdi senle bu kadar ilgilendigim yeter hadi simdi babama bakalim.

My father double burned me by excluding me from his land sharing by kicking and insulting me and demolished my beach tent and burning my press clippings when I needed such a support most in my worst time. Babam, bir destege encok ihtiyacim olan en kotu zamanimda beni tekmeleyip hakaretler etmis, plaj cadirimi yikmis, basin kupurlerimi yakmis ve yer paylasimindan uzak tutarak beni iki kere yakmistir.

If my brothers were not backstabbers like my father and Gladio Ozceri they would not exclude me in land sharing and give my right to me for solidarity in my fight against oppression
of Gladio Undersecretary Ozceri.
Eger kardeslerim babam ve Gladyo Ozceri gibi arkadan vuran hainler olmasalardi beni yer paylasma isinden dislamazlar ve NATO Gladyo Mustesari
Ozceri’nin zulmune karsi mucadeleme destek olmak icin bana payimi verirlerdi.

I know my brothers always claim they side with the oppressed against the oppressor. Kardeslerim her zaman zalime karsi ezilenin tarafini tuttuklarini iddia ederler. All family and even all world would benefit from my victory against Undersecretary Ozceri. Ozceri’ye karsi kazansaydim butun aile hatta butun dunya bundan fayda gorurdu. Truth and justice would win against Gladio oppression. Gladyo zulmune karsi
gercek ve adalet kazanirdi. But this injustice started with 1980 military coup d’états against all Turkey and is still on. Fakat bu adaletsizlik butun Turkiye’ye karsi yapilan 1980 askeri darbesiyle basladi ve hala devam ediyor.

Here only problem is brainwashing. Burda tek sorun beyin yikama sorunu.
Again my father used his murderer buddy as his hitman in this land sharing deal. Yine babam bu yer paylasma isinde katil bir dostunu tetikci olarak kullandi. His buddy had murdered and then burned a guy just for his money. Babamin ahbabi sadece parasi icin bir adami oldurdukten sonra yakmisti.

When I told my father about my justice struggle and asked his solidarity he beat me up many times inside and outside the village tea houses just to get rid of me from Kuyumcullu. Babam hak arama mucadelemi anlatip destegini istedigim zaman Kuyumculludan beni atabilmek icin koy kahvehanelerinin icinde ve disinda beni bircok kez yumrukla dovdu ve sovdu.

He always ridiculed my plead for solidarity from him. Dayanisma isteklerimi hep alaya aldi. He always ridiculed me that I should be leftist not to be blacklisted in the leftist ministry. Babam hep solcu bakanlikta mimlenmemek icin solcu olmami soyleyerek benle
alay etti. He always refused the fact that Ozceri was not lefist but a NATO Gladio Undersecretary. Babam Ozceri’nin solcu degil NATO Gladyo Mustesari oldugu gercegini kabul etmedi. Donmeh Undersecretary Nuzhet Ozdemir is not leftist but rightist. Donme Mustesar Nizhet Kandemir bir solcu degil fakat sagcidir. President General Kenan Evren was Gladio too. Cumhurbaskani General Evren de Gladyoydu.

Foreign Ministry oppressed me to break a world record for I was blacklisted as a sympathizer for the Association of Idealist (Gray Wolves) Youth while it assigned Leader of Gray Wolves Alpaslan Turkes as secret ambassador to Armenia and had him secretly negotiate with Head of State of Armenia Petrosian. Disisleri Ulkucu Genclik Dernegi sempatizani olarak fislendigim icin bana dunya rekoru eziyet ederken Ulkuculerin Basbugu Alpaslan Turkes’i Turkiye’nin Ermenistan’a gizli elcisi olarak tayin edip Devlet Baskani Petrosyan’la gizli gorusmeler yaptiriyordu. Here : Burda : http://gizlibelge.wordpress.com/2010/03/16/gurbuz-capanin-ermenistan-itirafi-turkes-baslatti-abd-istedi/ ; http://keykubat.blogspot.com/2012/10/turkes-petrosyan-bulsumasi-projesi.html#axzz2omy6TN5j

Alpaslan Turkes was very busy secretly meeting with Armenians from 1993 until he died in 1997 when he always refused to meet me to listen to my justice struggle. Alpaslan Turkes 1993 yilindan 1997 yilinda olene kadar Ermenilerle gizli gorusmeler yapmakla mesguldu ki bu tarihlerde hak arama mucadelemi bir kere bile dinlemeyi reddetmistir.

Therefore I spoke with the gray wolves’s weekly newspaper Ortadogu about my struggle which run a full front page news with my pictur on it headlined as “Drama of the Gray Wolve”. Bu nedenle ulkuculerin haftalik gazetesi Ortadogu gazetesi ile gorustum ve tum bas sayfasini kaplayacak sekilde resmimle beraber “Ulkucunun Drami” baslikli bir haber cikarttim.

After my news in Ortadogu my worse experience in trying to speak with Turkes was when officials in his office in the National Action Party finally told me “Leader” is busy meeting with the American Ambassador and they will punish me if I insist on meeting him. Ortadogu’daki bu haberden sonra Turkesle gorusme cabalarim esnasinda yasadigim en kotu tecrubem en sonunda Milliyetci Hareket Partisi’nde Turkesin ozel burosunda gorevli yetkililerin bana “Basbugun” Amerikan Buyukelcisi ile gorusmekle mesgul oldugunu ve bir daha “Basbugla” gorusmek icin gelirsem beni cezalandirmakla tehdit etmeleriydi.

But I easily met with Devlet Bahceli who deputy to Turkes and he pledged to help my justice struggle if he gets in the Government. Fakat Turkesin yardimcisi olan Devlet Bahceli ile kolayca gorustum ve kendisi bana eger hukumete girerse hak arama mucadeleme destek olacagina soz verdi. After Bahceli joined the government he refused to meet me and officials in his office threatened to beat me if I come again. Bahceli hukumete girdikten sonra benimle gorusmesi reddetti ve burosundaki gorevliler eger bir daha gelirsem beni dovmekle tehdit ettiler.

By the way, Menter Sahinler was undersecretary in Turkish Embassy in Paris and closely worked with Gray Wolves Leader Alpaslan Turkes and joined in the secret negotiations with Armenians and authored his book about kemalism. Yeri gelmisken Menter Sahinler Turkiye’nin Paris Buyukelciligi Mustesari olarak ulkuculerin Basbugu Alpaslan Turkes ile yakinda calismisti ve Ermenilerle yapilan gizli muzakerelere katilmis ve kemalizm hakkinda kitap yazmisti.

Kemalist diplomat Menter Sahinler who received a reward from kemalist UFO fans, was assigned to Cultural Affairs Department of Foreign Ministry and harassed me by constantly assigning illegal works. Kemalist UFO’culardan odul alan kemalist diplomat Menter Sahinler calistigim Disisleri Kultur Dairesi’ne tayin olmus ve yetkisi olmadigi halde bana surekli evrak havale ederek beni taciz etmisti. Kemalist Sahinler knows my blacklisting as he knows me from the first days when I entered Foreign Ministry. Kemalist Sahinler beni Disisleri’ne ilk girdigim gunlerden beri tanidigi icin fislendigimi biliyordu. Here: Burda: http://uzayci.tripod.com/kemalist_ufocular.htm ; http://www.amazon.com/The-Origin-Effect-Currency-Kemalism/dp/3861210991

Gladio works for CIA. Gladyo CIA’ya hizmet eder. My father’s accusation to the left is a fasicist Gladio tactic. Babamin solu suclamasi bir Gladyo taktigidir. Evren, Ozal and Ozceri were American puppets and fought for America. Evren, Ozal ve Ozceri Amerikan kuklasiydilar ve Amerika icin savastilar.

My fascist father denies that it was right wing capitalist fascist imperialist puppets like President General Evren, Prime Minister Turgut Ozal, Foreign Minister Mesut Yilmaz, Donme undersecretary Nuzhet Kandemir and Gladio Undersecretary Ozceri fired me. Babam beni sagci kapitalist fasist emperyalist kuklasi Cumhurbaskani General Evren, Basbakan Ozal, Donme Mustesar Nuzhet Kandemir ve Gladyo Mustesari Ozceri’nin attigini inkar eder.

My father never admits he got me blacklisted deliberately. Babam beni bile bile mimlettigini asla kabul etmez. He always mocks me by yelling “You are blacklisted my son”. Babam her zaman “Oglum sen mimlendin” diye bagirip alay eder. He ridicules me saying “Leftists branded your ass!”. “Solcular seni gotunden damgaladilar!” diye alay eder. He tries to pit me against the leftists everywhere especially in the state.
Boylece beni heryerdeki ve ozellikle devlet icindeki solculara karsi kiskirtir.

Typical Gladio tactic. Bilinen Gladyo taktigi. He always denies that Undersecretary Ozceri was NATO Gladio Undersecretary. Mustesari Ozceri’nin NATO Gladyo Mustesari oldugunu daima inkar eder. He also denies that the then Prime Minister was American puppet rightist fascist capitalist Ozal. O zamanki Basbakanin da Amerikan
kuklasi sagci fasist kapitalist Ozal oldugunu inkar eder.

My father will never admit he deliberately and willingly blacklisted and burned me. Babam beni bile bile isteyerek mimledigini ve yaktigini asla kabul etmeyecek. But he can never deny the solid proofs .Ancak kesin ispatlari inkar edemez. Welcome to Gladio world and its fascist Gladio puppet republic. Gladyo dunyasina ve onun fasist Gladyo kuklasi cumhuriyete hosgeldiniz.

As l lost legal battle in the Gladio Coup d’états injustice system I came to Kuyumcullu village. Gladyo Darbesi Adaletsizlik Sisteminde mahkeme savasini kaybedince Kuyumcullu koyune geldim. I visited my father when he was in jail for de-forestration, for violation against the forest law hoping to get some support again. Orman yakmaktan, Orman Kanunu’na muhalefetten hapse giren babami destek saglamak umuduyla ziyaret ettim.

My father was standing and speaking to me together with Omer Iskender, son of
Huseyin Iskender.
Huseyin Iskender oglu Omer Iskender ile birlikte ayakta benimle konusuyordu. I heard Omer burned an innocent man after robbing him for
money.
Omer’in masum bir adami parasi icin oldurdukten sonra yaktigini duymustum. My father ordered me to shoot to murder my own brothers for a piece of hazelnut land. Babam bir parca findik tarlasi icin oz kardeslerimi vurup oldurmemi emretti.

My father said my real brother Sezai imposed on him this land sharing deal. Babam ozkardesim Sezai’nin bu yer paylasma isini kendisine dayattigini soyledi. My father said my real brother Sezai and two other real brothers Tural and Sezgin robbed my share for themselves. Babam oz kardesim Sezai’nin diger oz kardeslerim Tural ve Sezgin’le beraber benim yerimi de zorla kaptiklarini soyledi.

I asked him “You are my father, why did you allow them to rob my land?” My father answered that he had to give in to my brothers’ force. Babam oz kardeslerimin gucu karsisinda mecbur kaldigini soyledi. He ordered me to murder my own real brothers and take my hazelnut land back. Kendi ozkardeslerimi oldurup findik tarlami geri almami emretti. His jail mate Omer Iskender also supported my father’s order. Babamin kogus arkadasi Omer Iskender de babamin emrini destekledi.

I was so shocked with this order to murder my own brothers. Kardeslerimin
katli icin verilen bu emirle muthis sok olmustum. They were yelling at my surprise and telling me that this mind-set I have is why I deserve starvation. Benim saskinligima kizip bagiriyorlar ve bu kafa yuzunden acligi hak ettigimi soyluyorlardi. I was frozen and looking
at my father and Omer like I saw devil.
Ben donup kaldim ve sanki seytan gormus gibi Babamla Omer’e baktim.

Cruelty is an established value of this system. Acimasizlik bu sistemin kabul edilmis bir degeridir. Both in global and local level. Hem kuresel hem de yerel duzeyde. Against social solidarity NATO Gladio imposes lies and violence in all levels to divide people in the name of capitalist elites. Kapitalist elitler adina NATO
Gladyo her duzeyde halki bolmek icin yalani ve siddeti dayatir.

NATO Gladio implemented false flag terrorism before 1980 in order to justify its military coup d’état. NATO Gladyo 1980 oncesinde sahte terorizm uygulayarak askeridarbeye kilif uydurmustu. NATO Gladio hurt millions in Turkey and other countries by pitting people against each other. NATO Gladyo Turkiye’de ve oteki ulkelerde halklari birbirine karsi dusurerek milyonlarca insana aci cektirdi.

My father follows same plan in his little world. Babam kendi kucuk dunyasinda ayni plani takip eder. System produces its imitators. Sistem taklitcilerini yaratir. Let me put a note here please. Burda bir not koymama musaade edin lutfen.

Later on in Denmark my real brother Sezai also said to me in Denmark that he can easily kill my father now because my father is sick and lost all his power. Daha sonra Oz kardesim Sezai, babamin artik yaslandigini, hastalandigini ve eski gucunu kaybettigini soyleyip babami artik kolaylikla oldurebilecegini anlatti.

Sezai told me that he gave money and luxury car and pampered my brothers Tural and Sezgin in Kuyumcullu and stressed that he can kill any body he wants including my father. Sezai Kuyumculluda oturan oz kardeslerim Tural ve Sezgine para ve luks araba verdigini ve onlari el ustunde tuttugunu ve babam dahil istedigi herkesi oldurebilecegini anlatti.

My brother Sezai gave me shocking life threat to my own life too as he explained he uses my two brothers Tural and Sezgin as his hitmen in his loansharking operation. Kardesim Sezai tefecilik isinde kardeslerim Tural ve Sezgin’i tetikci olarak kullandigini bana aciklayarak ve babam bile oldurebilecegini vurgulayarak benim hayatima karsi da korkunc bir tehditte bulunmus oldu.

This is micro level mafia Gladio protecting Gladio Ozceri against my struggle for justice. Iste bu kardeslerimin kurdugu ve Gladyo Ozceriyi benim hak arama mucadeleme karsi koruyan en kucuk boyutta mafia Gladyodur. Lying, false charging, violence, threat and murder are normal. Yalan, iftira, siddet, tehdit ve cinayet normaldir. This is
Gladio culture.
Gladyo kulturu budur.

My brother Sezai also said he is the man who imposes the ban on aunt Ayse’s family since her sons shot to kill us. Sezai bizi oldurmek icin ates eden Ayse halamin ailesine koye gelme yasagini uygulayan asil kisinin kendisi oldugunu soyledi. Sezai said he can get all of aunt Ayse’s family killed by trapping them with a fake peace. Sezai yalandan barismis gibi yaparak Ayse halamin butun ailesini tuzaga dusurup oldurebilecegini anlatti.

My brother Sezai continued and insulted me saying he is my elder brother and l am not his elder brother anymore because he is the winner and l am the loser. Sezai hayatta benim kaybettigimi kendisinin kazandigini dolayisiyla artik benim abi olmadigimi ve bundan sonra benim ona abi demem lazim geldigini soyledi. Sezai talked and acted like he was mafia family boss! Sezai mafya patronu gibi konusup hareket etti!

One day my real brother Sezai sneaked inside my girl friend’s bedroom in her apartment without any invitation or notice. Bir gun oz kardesim Sezai bayan arkadasimin dairesinin yatak odasina hic haber vermeden davetsiz girip bizi korkuttu. I was so shocked Sezai found the apartment! Sezai’nin Apartmani bulmasindan dolayi buyuk bir sok yasadim.

Sezai said my Danish girlfriend was very bad because she wanted him to buy a bottle of wine to drink when he picked her up in the street driving her to his apartment. Sezai bana benim Danimarka’li bayan arkadasimin cok kotu oldugunu cunku gecen gun onu yoldan alip
oturdugu dairesine giderken yolda kendisinden bir sise sarap almasini istedigini anlatti.

Sezai also said his Danish coworker Oli in his factory was living upstairs in my girlfriend’s apartment building and he is hiding all his cash he saved in his lifetime in his apartment. Sezai calistigi fabrikadaki Danimarkali mesai arkadasi Oli’nin benim bayan arkadasimin oturdugu dairenin ust katinda oturdugunu ve Oli’nin hayati boyunca biriktirdigi butun parasini nakit olarak dairesinde sakladigini anlatti.

Sezai really scared me when he said he could kill Oli to rob all his cash from his apartment. Sezai apartmandaki tum parasini soymak icin Oliyi oldurebilecegini soyleyince beni gercekten cok korkuttu.

I wish l never went to hear and to live such horrible experience. Keske boyle korkunc bir seyi duymak ve tecrube etmek icin Danimarka’ya hic gitmeseydim.

When my father ordered me to kill my own real brothers Tural, Sezgin and Sezai my father knew very well l was against violence all my life but he just repeated his habit of using me as his hitman. Babam ozkardeslerim Tural’i, Sezgin’i ve Sezai’yi vurup oldurmemi istedigi zaman benim butun hayatim boyunca siddete karsi oldugumu biliyordu fakat o beni tetikci olarak kullanma aliskanligini tekrarladi.

My father should know l would not and could not do it. Babamin bunu yapmayacagimi ve yapamayacagimi cok iyi bilmesi gerekirdi. Otherwise my father would talk to me in private. Yoksa babam benimle gizli olarak konusurdu. My father wanted to scare my brothers sending them a message with this move. Babam bu hareketiyle kardeslerime bir mesaj gondererek onlari korkutmak istedi.

In the meantime he hoped that my brothers would kill me out of their fear that l might kill
them.
Ayni zamanda kendilerini oldurecegimden korkan kardeslerimin beni oldurebileceklerini umdu.

My father also knew that as I am not professional hitman so even if l wanted to follow his order to kill l could not possibly kill all three of my real brothers. Babam professionel bir
tetikci olmadigimi bu nedenle babamin oldurme emrine uysam bile ozkardeslerimin ucunu birden oldurmemin hic mumkun olmadigini biliyordu. My father wanted to send me to a suicide mission. Babam beni bir intihar saldirisina gondermek istedi. Even if l never do
anything my brothers could kill me out of fear!
Ben hicbirsey yapmasam bile kardeslerim korkudan beni oldurebilirlerdi. If my brothers killed me out fear then my father would take all power and properties back! Eger kardeslerim korkudan beni oldurmus olsaydilar babam gucunu ve mallari yeniden kazanacakti.

If my father wanted justice by killing my brothers Sezai, Tural and Sezgin like this then why he did not order half brothers Murat and Ozcan to team up with me to kill for justice? Eger babam ozkardeslerim Tural’i, Sezgin’i, ve Sezai’yi oldurerek adalet istediyse neden uvey kardeslerim Murat ve Ozcan’a benimle birlik olmalarini emretmedi? Why did he spare my half brothers Murat and Ozcan like his eyes while burning me? Neden beni yakarken uvey kardeslerim Murat ve Ozcan’i bu isten gozu gibi sakindi?

After my father’s order to hit my own brothers, I went to speak with my sister Nezahat and her husband Resat Iskender about this horrible plan. Babamin oz kardeslerimi
vurma emrinden sonra bu korkunc plan hakkinda ablam Nezahat ve kocasi Resat iskender ile konusmaya gittim. I told my sister and her husband about all this murder plan by using me as hitman against her 20 years ago and now against my own real brothers but they reacted
wildly.
Babamin 20 yil once ablama karsi ve yine simdi ozkardeslerime karsi beni tetikci olarak kullanarak yaptigi cinayet planlariyla ilgili herseyi ablama ve kocasina anlattim ama bana cok sert tepki gosterdiler.

They yelled at me that I should never mention this story again. Bu konuyu bir daha acmamam icin bana bagirdilar. They argued that my father is a very good man and in fact I am the mean one. Babamin cok iyi bir adam oldugunu asil benim kotu kalpli oldugumu iddia ettiler.

My sister Nezahat’s husband Resat used to complain that it was big injustice that my father extracted big ransom money as they eloped 20 years ago! Nezahat ablamin kocasi Resat 20 yil once ablamla kactiklari zaman babamin buyuk fidye parasi kopartarak buyuk haksizlik yaptigini sikayet ediyordu! They forgat that they paid that small fortune ransom money to my father only because they feared I was to take their lives as my fathers’ hitman. Sadece babamin tetikcisi olarak onlarin canlarini alacagimdan korktuklari icin kucuk bir servet olan parayi babama odediklerini unuttular. They also do not understand that those properties would never exist without that money if my father did not use me as hitman by sacrificing me.
Babamin beni gozden cikarip tetikci olarak kullanip sirtimdan aldigi o para olmasa o mallarin da olmayacagini anlamiyorlar.

Here I cannot pass without writing about a dog. Burda kardeslerimin kopege yaptigini yazmadan gecemem. My brothers Tural and Sezgin brought a very good dog to my mother’s house. Kardeslerim Tural ve Sezgin annemin evine cok iyi bir kopek getirdiler. That dog was ver loyal and protective. O kopek cok sadik ve koruyucuydu. But people complained that they were scared of that dog barking and getting close at them. Fakat yoldan yaya gecen halk o kopegin kendilerine dogru yaklasip havlamasindan korktuklari icin sikayetci oldular.

That dog never touched anybody. O kopek hickimseye dokunmadi. My brothers Tural and Sezgin shot that dog just for his loyalty! Kardeslerim Rural ve Sezgin o kopegi sadece sadakati yuzunden vurdular! They killed him only because he was loyal and protecting the family. o kopegi sadece sadik oldugu ve ailesi korudugu icin oldurduler. They could easily weave fence around the yard but they preferred killing him in response to his loyalty. Rahatlikla bahcenin etrafina cit orebilirlerdi fakat sadakatine karsilik onu oldurmeyi tercih ettiler. This is cruel tradition coming from my father and grandfather. Bu acimasiz gelenek babamdan ve dedemden gelmektedir.

Similarly my father’s family destroyed my mother even though she was totally loyal to my father. Benzer sekilde babamin ailesi babama tamamen sadik olan annemi mahvetmistir. Similarly they backstabbed me even though I was totally loyal. Benzer sekilde tamamen sadik olmama ragmen beni arkadan bicaklamislardir.

They kicked me out of their apartment after midnight and forced me to walk at least 3 hours to get back to my real mother’s place. Beni dairelerinden gece yarisindan sonra kovarak Karasu’dan Salikkaya’ya enaz uc saat annemin evine yurumeye beni mecbur ettiler. ln a little bit later the big earthquake hit my sister Nezahat’s building which almost killed everybody. Kisa bir sure sonra gelen buyuk deprem Nezahat ablamin kaldigi binayi yerle bir ettigi icin herkes canini zor kurtardi.

As I lost all legal remedies against Capitalist injustice system I had decided to march from my village Salikkaya (Karasu District of Sakarya Province) to the Primeministry in Ankara to fight all the injustices that I saw in my life. Kapitalist Adaletsizlik Sisteminde tum yasal yollari tuketince Turkiye’de hayatimda gordugum butun haksizliklara karsi koyum Salikkaya’dan (Sakarya Vilayeti’nin Karasu Ilcesi ) Ankara’da Basbakanliga yuruyus yapmaya karar verdim. My grievances focused on my career diplomat job in the Foreign Ministry of Turkey. Sikayetlerim Disisleri Bakanligi’daki meslek memurlugum uzerinde yogunlasiyordu.

My three walks took 45 day altogether. Uc yuruyusum toplam 45 gun surdu. My brothers Sezai, Tural and Sezgin were in the village. Kardeslerim Sezai, Tural ve Sezgin koydeydiler. Nobody in my clan supported my protests except a few silent supporters. Sulalemden birkac sessiz destekci disinda hickimse acikca protestomu desteklemedi. But I found a lot of supporters during my protests. Fakat protestolarim sirasinda cok destekci buldum.

Sezai and Tural insulted me waking me up while sleeping in the nigh time in my mother’s house with noise and acting like l am a loser and does not belong to their groupie. Sezai ve Tural gece annemin evinde ben uyurken gurultu yaparak beni uyandirdilar ve bana becereksizmisim ve aileden degilmisim gibi hakaret ettiler. This incident happened in that summer between my protests! Bu olay o yaz protestolarimin arasinda oldu.

As a response to my protests my brother Tural said l deserved all these abuses because l called him forest bear in front of foreign tourists. Kardesim Tural turistlere kendisi icin orman ayisidir dedigim icin herseyi hakettigimi soyledi.

Brother Tural repeated this bear story so many times as he banged big iron digging bar on the floor while I was on my bed. Kardesim Tural ben yataktayken buyuk oygu demirini yere vurarak bu ayi hikayesini tekrarlayip durdu. That was scary show with Tural banging big iron digging bar in the middle of the night. Bu Turalin gecenin yarisinda buyuk oygu demirini yere vurarak yaptigi korkunc bir gosteriydi. It was like Tural was digging my grave in the middle of the room! Sanki Tural mezarimi odanin ortasina kaziyordu!

I think forest bears are beautiful, peaceful, much better animals than humans. Orman ayilari, insanlardan cok daha iyi, guzel ,bariscil hayvanlardir. All animals are better than humans. Butun hayvanlar insanlardan daha iyidir. Because animals support ecosystem while humans destroy it! Cunku hayvanlar doga sistemin korurken insanlar dogayi yok ederler.

I wish humans become intelligent as animals and protect the ecosystem. Keske insanlar hayvanlar kadar akilli olabilseydi ve dogayi korusaydi.

I cannot pass without mentioning that my real brother Tural tried to intimidate me by bragging that they own an AK-47 automatic rifle and he fires to air in the weddings. Oz kardesim Tural’in kendilerine ait AK-47 otomatik keles silahi oldugunu ve dugunlerde havaya attiklarini beni korkutmak icin bana soyledigini yazmadan gecemem.

Tural scared me by bragging that he is more dangerous than terrorists. Tural teroristlerden daha tehlikeli oldugunu soyleyip ovunerek beni korkuttu. Tural also
bragged to scare me that he and brother Sezgin almost killed my younger sister Kadriye’s husband Mehmet Yildiz who is a totally harmless long time depressed person by kidnapping, beating and
torturing him for showing off to public under the guise of punishing him and got away without any charge.
Tural beni korkutmak icin kardesim Sezgin ile beraber kiz kardesim
Kadriye’nin tamamen zararsiz psikolojik depression yasayan kocasi Mehmet Yildiz’i millete hava atmak amaciyla guya cezalandirmak icin kacirdiklarini, dayak ve iskenceyle nerdeyse oldurduklerini ancak cok rahat takipsizlik karariyla kurtulduklarini ovunerek anlatti. Victim Mehmet has children and a nice unionized welding job in the Railcar Factory! Magdur Mehmetin cocuklari var ve Vagon Fabrikasinda sendikali kaynak ustasi olarak calisiyor!

Tural said my father and step mother provoked them for this atrocity. Tural bu acimasiz olayda kendilerini babamin ve uvey annemin kiskirttigini anlatti. lf the victim Mehmet Yildiz did not survive Tural and Sezgin would go to jail so that my father and step mother would take back all power and property back. Eger magdur Mehmet Yildiz olseydi Tural ve Sezgin hapse hapse gidecek ve babamla uvey annem gucu ve mallari geri alacaklardi.

Their excuse was that Mehmet told my sister Kadriye not to look outside window! Bahaneleri ise Mehmetin Kadriyeye camdan bakma demesiydi! Why do you kidnap, torture and almost murder a harmless guy for such a poor excuse while all you guys from the village do not even allow women walk in the village center? Koyun butun erkekleri olarak siz kadinlarin koyun ortasindan yuruyerek gecmesine musaade etmezken neden kimseye zarari olmayan isi gucu cocuklari olan bir adami silah zoruyla kacirip iskenceyle nerdeyse oldurdunuz? Nobody from the village questioned this atrocity. Koyden hickimse bu vahseti sorgulamadi.

What kind of twisted sick mind is this? Nasil bir hastalikli kafa yapisidir bu?
Now you know why my brother Sezai is calling me insane for writing my life! Simdi kardesim Sezai’nin bana hayatimi yazdigim icin neden deli dedigini biliyorsunuz! Once you are labeled insane you lose your legal and social status and can be murdered by torture without trouble! Birkere deli olarak damgalaninca herturlu yasal ve sosyal statunuzu kaybediyorsunuz ve sorun cikmadan iskence altinda oldurulebilirsiniz! Once they take away your status will lies nobody will question your death under torture. Birkere yalanlarla statunuzu yokettikleri zaman iskence altindaki olumunuzu kimse sorgulamaz.

Of course none of my brothers and sisters liked my marching protests. Tabiki hicbir kardesim yuruyus protestolarimi istemedi. My brother Tural got defensive against my marches and always said they did not give me land because l went to schools. Kardesim Tural yuruyuslerime karsi savunma durumuna gecti ve okullara gittigim icin bana yer vermediklerini soyledi. All brothers and sisters disappeared from my sight. Butun kardeslerim ortadan kayboldular.

Brother Tural argues that if you study you lose your position in the family.
Kardesim Tural eger okursan ailedeki hakkini kaybersin diyor. To him, going school is like trying to murder father. Ona gore okula gitmek baba oldurmeye tesebbus gibidir. Automatically you lose your family rights. Otomatikman aile haklarini kaybedersin.

They label you insane to strip your rights then burn you as they wish. Seni
haklarindan mahrum etmek icin deli damgasi vururlar, sonra da istedikleri gibi seni yakarlar. So my brother Tural pointed out the real reason why Grand Father Osman Cavus family, my father and step mother started this destructive campaign to burn me: my study was a threat for them. Kardesim Tural, Osman Cavus ailesinin, babamin, uvey annemin nicin beni yakmak icin bu yikici kampanyaya basladiklarini boylece gostermis oldu: okumam onlar icin bir tehditti.

Yes school is big threat to sick minds. Evet hasta kafalar icin okul cok buyuk
tehdittir. That is why sick minded people do not send their daughters to school in many countries. Bu nedenle bircok ulkede hasta kafali adamlar kiz cocuklarini okul yollamazlar.

My brother Tural built a 50 cow-capacity factory farm right next to my real mother’s old house in her backyard while I needed most help to fight Gladio undersecretary Ozceri.Benim Gladyo Ozceri’ye karsi encok destege ihtiyacim oldugu zamanlarda Oz kardesim Tural annemin oturdugu eski evin tam yaninda arka bahcesine 50 inek kapasiteli bir modern ahir
yapti.

Tural is so greedy. Tural cok acgozludur. Tural got all the support from brothers Sezgin, Sezai and my father for this factory farm while they all backstabbed me!. Beni hepberaber arkadan hancerlerken Tural, bu modern ahir icin Sezgin, Sezai ve babamdan
herturlu destegi aldi. My brothers robbed our family resources for this factory farm while excluding me from land, hazelnuts, money, car and tractor and everything like l am their enemy. Kardeslerim beni sanki onlarin dusmaniymisim gibi yerden, findiktan, paradan, arabadan, traktorden ve herseyden dislarken kendileri bu modern ahir icin aile kaynaklarini soydular.

Okey here is some successes of my family while they backstabbed and starved me in my struggle against Gladio undersecretary Ozceri in the Foreign Ministry. Beni Disisleri’ndeki Gladyo Mustesari Ozceri’ye karsi mucadelemde arkadan hancerleyip ac birakirken ailemin bazi ekonomik basarilari sunlardir.

My grandfather Osman Cavus enjoyed two apartment buildings, one 3 stories and other 5 stories and built and donated multi-story religious school and sold 20 tones hazel nuts every year until he died. Osman Cavus dedem birisi uc katli oteki de bes katli iki apartman binasi yaptirdi ve ayrica cok katli bir din okulu yaptirip dernege bagisladi ve olene kadar her yil 20 ton findik topladi.

My father sold 30 tones hazel nuts every year and built two-story luxury house and registered it to my step mother Hayriye Ozturk. Babam her yil 30 ton findik topladi ve iki katli luks bir ev yaptirip uvey annem Hayriye Ozturk’un ustune kaydetti.

Brother Tural, Sezgin and Sezai grabbed lands from my father for themselves but falsely claiming it is for my real mother and also my maternal uncles after my maternal grandparents’
death.
Kardesim Tural, Sezgin ve Sezai sanki annem icin agliyor us gibi yapip babamdan ve anneannemle topal Mehmet dedem oldukten sonra da Hasan Yilmaz dayimdan kendileri icin yer koparttilar. They used my mother’s position to grab land for themselves. Kendilerine mal kapmak icin annemin durumunu kullandilar.

Brother Sezai robbed money from her late wife Mercan and from poor victims of his loansharking operation by using Tural and Sezgin as his hitmen and gave Tural and Sezgina luxury German opel car and a lot of money. Kardesim Sezai olen karisi Mercandan ve Tural ve Sezgin’i tetikci olarak kullandigi tefecilik isindeki kurbanlarindan kaptigi paralarla Tural ve Sezgine luks Alman Opel marka araba ve bol para verdi.

Again Brother Tural with help from Sezgin and Sezai built this 50-cow capacity factory farm. Tekrar kardesim Tural, Sezgin ve Sezai’nin yardimiyla 50 bas kapasiteli modern ahir yaptirdi. Brother Tural used to tell me constantly that he wants to be a meat king from poor animals. Tural bana zavalli hayvanlarin sirtindan buyuk paralar kazanip et krali olmak istedigini anlatip dururdu.

Tural’s factory farm is a torture chamber for poor animals. Tural’in modern ahiri zavalli hayvanlar icin bir iskence yeridir. He brags that he will tie animals all day to fatten them so he can make more money. Butun gun zavalli hayvanlari bagli tutarak onlari
sismanlatacagini ve boylece cok para yapacagini anlatip ovunurdu.

Tural’s factory farm produces dangerous manor and urine and emits so much dangerous gases destroying environment. Tural’in modern ahiri cikardigi cok buyuk diski ve
idrarla ve tehlikeli gazlarla cevreyi yok etmektedir. Sick and cruel business in the middle of new Salikkaya neighbourhood! Yeni Salikkaya mahallesinin ortasinda hasta ve vahsi bir isletme!

Tural also abused my poor mother to use her like forced slave labor in the construction of his factory farm. Tural modern ahirin yapiminda annemi zorla kole gibi calistirdi ve cok eziyet etti. Tural also pressures my poor mother too much to do all dirty work in his
factory farm and serve him in the house like a slave.
Tural ahirindaki pis isleri ve evdeki herturlu hizmeti kole gibi yaptirmak icin zavalli anneme asiri baski yapiyor. My poor mother tried commit suicide under unbearable abuses and subjected to painful electroshocks and is on prescription drugs all the time in the past. Zamaninda zavalli annem dayanilmaz eziyetler altinda intihar edip kurtulmak istemis ve bu nedenle son derece aci veren elektro soklara tabi tutulmus ve hep doktorlarin verdigi ilaclari kullanmistir.

Brother Tural used to threaten my mother to lock her inside his car trunk and drive her to Bakirkoy Mental Hospital to forcefully subject her to painful electroshocks if she disobeys him! Kardesim Tural eger annem emirlerine karsi gelirse annemi arabasinin arka bagajina kilitledikten sonra annemi Bakirkoy Akil Hastanesine goturmek ve orda zorla zalim elektro soklara tabi tutmakla tehdit ediyordu!

Tural did threaten my mother like this when l was in the house. Tural ben evdeyken bu tehdidi anneme yapti. I told Tural “you deserve it if my mother poison you”! Tural’a “annem seni zehirlerse sen bunu hak ediyorsun” dedim. But my mother is a total angel! Fakat benim annem tam bir melek! Brother Tural lives on my mother’s house and hazelnuts land driving luxury car like a king and terrorizing my mother for any excuse. Kardesim Tural annemin evinde ve annemin findik bahcelerini yiyip luks araba kullanarak krallar gibi yasarken annemi terorize ediyor.

Brother Tural is right that he is more dangerous than a terrorist because no one can do this torture to a poor mother. Kardesim teroristlerden daha tehlikeli oldugunu soylerken hakli cunku kimse zavalli bir anneye bu iskenceyi yapmaz. Brother Tural enlivens Grandfather Osman Cavus’ misogynist tradition perfectly. Kardesim Tural Osman Cavus Dedemin kadin dusmani gelenegini mukemmel sekilde yasatiyor. My brother Tural is misogynist, enemy of animals, enemy of environment, enemy of justice. Kadin dusmani, hayvan dusmani, cevre dusmani, adalet dusmani Kardesim Tural. Perfect grandson! Mukemmel torun!

This is why misogynist people never send girls to school! Iste bu nedenle kadin dusmani insanlar kizlarini okutmazlar! They want to keep women like slaves. Kadinlari kole gibi tutmak isterler. They could not stop my study but they treacherously
assasinated my character, backstabbed me and condemned me to starvation as much as they wished.
Okumami engelleyemediler ama istedikleri gibi serbestce kisiligimi katlettiler, beni arkadan bicakladilar ve acliga mahkum ettiler.

They brainwash people that school is so hard that if you study you lose your mind and become insane! Okulun cok zor oldugunu dolayisiyla universite okuyanlarin aklini kaybedip delirdikleri seklinde insanlarin beynini yikarlar. Of course this logic works only for their blacklisted person. Tabi bu mantik sadece mimledikleri insan icin gecerlidir.

This logic does not work for my step brother Ozcan. Uvey kardesim Ozcan icin bu mantik islemez. Of course, none of my brothers liked my protest march like they never liked my study and struggle for justice. Tabi kardeslerimin hicbirisi protesto yuruyusumden hoslanmadi aynen okumamdan ve hak mucadelemden hoslanmadiklari gibi.

Therefore, none of them called or came to see me leaving on foot from Salikkaya for
USA.
Bu nedenle ben Amerika’ya gelmek icin Salikkaya’dan yaya ayrilirken beni ugurlamak icin kimse aramadi ve gelmedi. My maternal aunt Hayriye’s husband Dursunali Ak saw me on my way walking from Salikkaya and picked me up and said he cannot believe his eyes and shamed my brothers. Hayriye Teyzemin kocasi Dursunali Eniste Salikkaya yolunda beni gorup arabasina aldi ve gozlerine inanamadigini soyledi ve kardeslerimi ayipladi. My family and coup d’états oligarchs backstabbed me and I rose my justice struggle to level of marches and they almost killed me by choking me and isolated me in response. Ailem ve cuntanin oligarklari beni arkadan bicakladilar ve ben hak arama mucadelemi yuruyusler yapma duzeyine yukseltince cevap olarak beni nerdeyse bogarak oldurduler ve tecrit ettiler.

However my father and his childhood buddy Talat cut my march to Ankara with the help from cops. Ancak babam ve cocukluk arkadasi muhtar Talat polislerin yardimiyla Ankara yuruyusumde izimi buldular. They cut me off and beat me up and ordered me to stop
my struggle.
Yolumu kestiler, beni dovduler ve mucadeleyi birakmami emrettiler. They said they will get the police to stop my march. Polise yuruyusumu durdurtacaklarini soylediler.

I was beaten many times on my marches and almost got chocked by 20 cops in front of national media cameras at the prime ministry main office, in my protests at the governor’s main office in Sakarya and at the Koroglu statue in the main square in Bolu. Sakarya Vilayet binasi onunde, Bolu Sehir Meydani’ndaki Koroglu Heykeli’nde ve Ankara’daki Basbakanlik Anabinasi onundeki protestolarimda ulusal medya kameralarinin karsisinda ve yollarda gece gunduz yururken polis engellerine ve dayaklarina maruz kaldim ve Basbakanlikta kamerallarin karsisinda ustume cullanip bogazimi sikan 20 polis tarafindan nerdeyse boguluyordum.

Police was encouraged by pleads from my father and his buddy village headman Talat to stop me. Babamin ve arkadasi muhtar Talatin beni durdurmak icin yaptigi ricalar polisi cesaretlendirdi. My father did everything in his capacity against my education, career,
justice struggle, immigration and improving my life.
Babam egitimime, meslegime, adalet mucadeleme ve guzel bir hayat kurmama karsi elinden gelen herseyi yapti.

When he got out of prison he snapped a fork to my eyes while l was eating my food at the same table with him and step mother Hayriye Ozturk! Ayni sofrada babam ve uvey annem Hayriye Ozturkle yemek yerken babam ansizin bir hareketle catal kasigini gozume saplamak icin hucum etti. They also banned me to eat food in the house like grapefruit! Evdeki greyfruit gibi yiyeceklerden de yememi yasakladilar!

My father is a little imitator of global fascist system. Babam kuresel fasist sistemin kucuk bir taklitcisidir. In the same way global capitalist fascist system imposes cruelty and condition masses against solidarity. Ayni sekilde, kuresel kapitalist fasist
sistem dayanismaya karsi vahseti dayatiyor ve kitleleri dayanismaya karsi sartlandiriyor.

In the meantime I found a serious date in one online dating site. Ayni zamanda
internetteki arkadaslik sitesinde ciddi bir kiz arkadas buldum. My father and step mother spied on me against my dating. Babam ve uvey annem kizla konusmama karsi casus gibi beni takibe aldilar. My father cussed out and beat me up for answering my date’s call on my cellphone. Kiz arkadasim beni cep telefonumdan aradiginda Babam bana kufur edip dovuyordu.

My father, step mother and elder sister Nezahat Iskender and brother Sezai
Iskender or Tural and Sezgin Iskender all ridiculed my efforts and refused to help me about my online dating in any way.
Babam, uvey annem, Nezahat ablam, kardeslerim
Sezai, Tural ve Sezgin hepsi internette arkadaslik cabalarimla alay ettiler ve bana yardim etmeyi reddettiler. All was negative. Hepsi olumsuzdu. They did not assist me even for a cent for my marriage and travelling to America. Ailem evlenmem ve Amerika’ya gelmem icin bir kurus bile yardim etmedi.

Once my brothers realized that I am seriously getting married they let me and my American wife stay overnight in the village and gave us a ride to marriage office to fake hospitality to a foreigner and to get rid of us! Kardeslerim ciddi olarak evlendigimi fark edince yabanciya karsi goz boyamak ve bizi baslarindan atmak icin Amerikali esimle beraber koyde gecelememize izin verdiler ve bizi arabayla Nikah Dairesi’ne goturduler. My family never ever helped about my marriage and flight other than this show! Ailem evliligim ve ucusum konusunda bu sov haricinde asla yardim etmedi.

However, after I came to America in 2000 my father started to call me many times each year. Ancak 2000 senesinde ben Amerika’ya geldikten sonra babam beni her yil bircok
kez aramaya basladi. Only thing he wanted from me was money for my half brother Ozcan in Kuyumcullu. Benden tek istedigi sey Kuyumculludaki uvey kardesim Ozcan icin
para idi.

He ordered me to send money to my half brother Ozcan to buy gas station. Babam uvey kardesim Ozcana benzin istasyonu almak icin para yollamami emretti. He hassled me for money for ten years. Beni tam on yil boyunca para icin sikistirip durdu.
However as I told him in 2010 that I got bankrupt then he stopped calling me for the last three years. Ancak 2010’da aradiginda kendisine iflas ettigimi soyleyince uc yildan beri aramayi tamamen kesti. This is the proof that he called me only for money but nothing else. Bu hareket babamin beni baska hicbirsey icin degil sadece para icin aradigini ispatliyor.

My brother Sezgin texted me many times to hassle me for money in the same period. Kardesim ayni zaman icinde para icin beni attigi mesajlarla sikistirdi. Sezgin argued that I owed him the cost of my car as he helped me to rescue it from my ex turkish wife. Sezgin eski esimden arabami kurtarmaya yardim ettigi icin o arabanin parasi kadar kendisine borclu oldugumu iddia etti. I wished I left that car to my ex wife! Keske arabami eski karima biraksaydim.

Around 2003 my brother Sezai warned that I should not call his landline in order to prevent his wife Mercan to complain about his beatings and womanizings and in 2010 he did not accept my request on the Facebook! Galiba 2003 yilinda kardesim Sezai karisi Mercani dovdugunu ve hergun baska kadinlarin pesinden kostugunu duymami engellemek icin evine telefon etmememi istedi ve 2010 yilinda Facebook uzerindeki arkadas listesine almayi reddetti.

In 2013 Sezai called me crazy for writing my life story and lied that he always helped me but never said why he avoided speaking with me for 10 years and refused my friendship request! 2013 yilinda hayat hikayemi yazdigim icin beni delilikle sucladi ve bana hep yardim ettigi seklinde yalan soyledi fakat nicin 10 yildir benimle konusmadigini ve Facebooktaki arkadas listesine almadigini aciklamadi.

Since first I got in the line waiting to embark on my plane to fly to USA I was always blacklisted as a Turkish immigrant everyday. Evlenerek ABD’ye gelmek icin havaalaninda ucaga binmek icin kuyruga girdigimden beri bir Turk gocmen olarak hergun mimlendim. The Airline security personnel treated everybody like we were all worthless garbage. Havayolu guvenlik gorevlileri sanki hepimiz degersiz copmusuz gibi muamele yaptilar.

When I was in the line waiting for passport control a female Delta Airlines employee approached to me and forced dishonorable interrogation on me in front of everybody with crazy questions like “Did you visit America before? Pasaport kontrolu icin kuyrukta beklerken Delta Havayollari’nin bir elemani daha once Amerika’ya ziyarette bulundun mu? gibi manyak sorularla herkesin onunde beni onur kirici sorgulama tacizine tabi tuttu.

When I complained her attitude of public interrogation to other people in the line they said this is very common practice! Gorevlinin herkesin icinde yaptigi onur kirici sorgulama tacizinden dolayi sirada bekleyenlere sikayet edince herkes bunun her zamanki uygulama oldugunu soyledi. Here: Burda: http://posta212.com/politika/abdde-havalimani-eziyeti

When I arrived at the Kennedy Airport in New York immigration officer kept me 4 hours in the waiting room for nothing. New York’taki Kenedi Havaalanina vardigim zaman Gocmen polisi beni 4 saat bosu bosuna bekleme odasinda bekletti. Immigration police tried every stupid trick to keep me longer. Gocmen polisi beni daha fazla alikoymak icin herturlu numarayi yapti. Here : Burda: http://www.nhregister.com/general-news/20120128/coming-to-america-mistreatment-of-immigrants-is-nothing-new

But then I heard every immigrant is complaining about this terrible treatment. Fakat yine her gocmenin ayni berbat muameleden sikayetci oldugunu duydum. In fact this mistreatment starts in the visa line at the American consulate. Aslinda bu berbat muamele Amerikan konsoloslugundaki vize kuyrugunda baslar. This is the norm in the capitalist empire. Bu kapitalist imparatorlukta gecerli bir yasam kuralidir.

You are always a second class citizen as an immigrant. Bir gocmen olarak daima ikinci sinif vatandas durumundasin. Immigrants have to deal with constant discrimination. Gocmenler surekli bu ayrimcilikla ugrasmak zorundadir. Immigrants have to deal with xenophobia. Gocmenler yabanci dusmanligi ile
ugrasmak zorundadir.

Immigrants are subjected to horrible conditions in the immigration and deportation
procedures!
Gocmenler gocmenlik ve sinirdisi islemlerinde korkunc islemlere maruz kalirlar!

On top of this oppression in the same time my father hassled me to rob my money to enrich my half brother Ozcan for ten years by calling me. Bu eziyetin ustune ayni zamanda babam da parami soyup uvey kardesim Ozcan’a yedirmek icin telefonla tam on
yil ugrasti durdu.

I suffered this because my father and military and civilian coup d’états burnt me from beginning and my family backstabbed me all the time. Bu aciyi cekmemin sebebi babamin ve askeri ve sivil cuntanin beni en basindan yakmasi ve ailemin de hep arkadan hancerlemesidir.

I worked extreme hours after I became a driver to earn freedom from slavery. Sofor olduktan kolelikten kurtulup ozgurlugumu haketmek icin korkunc uzun saatler calistim. I drove various vehicles professionally. Hayatimi kazanmak icin cesitli motorlu araclari kullandim.

When I started to live with ex wife who worked in night shift for many years, in Bay Shore Town, Long Island of New York State she just changed her night shift to day shift . New York Eyaletindeki Long Island bolgesindeki Bay Shore kasabasinda beraber yasamaya basladigim gun eski esim uzun yillar calistigi gece vardiyasini birakip gunduz vardiyasina gecti. She was away all day working which left me alone in adapting my new conditions. Esim gun boyunca iste oldugu icin cevre sartlarinda uyum saglama konusunda beni yalniz birakti.

My ex wife started to hassle me in the second week like “You have to get a job, you cannot hanging around unemployed any longer!” Eski esim geldigimin ikinci haftasinda “Bir ise girmen lazim, boyle bos duramazsin” diye beni sikistirmaya basladi. She took all my 6K from Turkey and did not even get me a bike to look for a job. Turkiyeden getirdigim 6 Bin dolarimi aldi ve is arayabilmem icin bana bir bisiklet bile almadi. She argued that my $6K money she took from me belonged to my ex turkish wife not to me therefore I did not deserve anything from it! Eski karim benden aldigi 6 Bin dolarin bana degil Turk esime ait oldugunu iddia ederek bu nedenle bu paradan benim hicbirsey hak etmedigimi iddia etti.

When I found a job in King Kullen supermarket with my own efforts in Bay Shore. Kendi gayretlerimle Bay Shore’daki King Kullen Supermarket zincirinde bir is buldum. My ex wife ridiculed me for my income and pressured me to work in a gas station for much longer hours. Eski esim kazandigim parayla alay etti ve bir benzin istasyonuna girip cok daha mesai yapmam icin bana baski yapti. Here: Burda : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_Kullen

My ex wife was very bitter about her previous Turkish fiancé who dumped her for her belligerence and foul mouth and was making up fake complaints about him to police in order to get him deported back to Turkey. Eski esim kendisini kavgaci ve kufurbaz oldugu icin kacip giden eski Turk nisanlisini sinirdisi ettirip Turkiye’ye geri yollamak icin polise gidip yalandan sikayetler uyduruyordu. She falsely alleged him to tamper with the basement lock and cut the phone and tv cable connections in the basement. Eski nisanlisini yalandan yere bodrum katinda giden kilite anahtar uydurup bodruma girip oradaki telefon ve televizyon kablolarini kesmekle sucladi.

My ex wife claimed she was debt-free until I moved in her house. Eski karim Ben evine girene kadar hicbir borcu olmadigini soyledi. In the first week she admitted $10K debt then $20K and which she gradually increased to $50K within a few months. Ilk hafta borcunun 10 bin dolar, sonra 20 bin dolar oldugunu ve yavasca artirarak bir kac ay icinde 50 bin dolara cikti.

This is consumerist system. Bu tuketimci sistem. My ex wife asked me to clean her garage. Eski karim garajini temizlememi istedi. While I clean her garage I found many unopened packages she bought long time ago but never opened! Garajini temizlerken cok onceden satin aldigi fakat hic acmadigi paketleri buldum. There was a huge set of garden furniture in its unopened package. Hic acilmamis paketin icinde buyuk bahce mobilyalari takimi vardi. Then there was big gas girl set. Sonra tuplu buyuk acik hava izgara seti vardi. There was running band. Kosu bandi vardi. There was professional tool box. Profesyonel alet kutusu vardi.

Like it was not enough she bought massive flowering, planting and gardening materials and brand new plastic fencing around the yard. Sanki bu yetmemis gibi cok buyuk ciceklik, fidelik ve bahcivanlik malzemeleri ve bahce icin yeni plastik cit aldi.

She bought expensive puppies from puppy mills that came with massive medical bills. Cok buyuk veteriner masraflarina yol acan pahali kopek yavrularini kar amaciyla calisan igrenc ureticilerden satin aldi. As she did not pay attention to care and training for her 3 dogs, they got massive fleas and shit and pissed everywhere on the house. Uc kopegin de bakim ve terbiyesi ile ilgilenmedigi icin ayni yatakta yattigi kopekler korkunc bitlendi ve her yere diski ve idrar yaptilar.

Then she started to take guitar lessons but refused to let me go to college, not even trucking school. Sonra gitar dersleri almaya basladi fakat benim universiteye veya agir vasita surucu okuluna gitmeme karsi cikti.

She refused to pick me up from a nearby office where I was for a job interview therefore got me soaking wet under cold torrential rain and later in winter time she obscenely cursed at me when I called her to pick me up from my workplace due to snow blizzard! Is basvurusu yaptigim yakindaki bir sirketten beni arabasiyla gelip almayi reddettigi icin soguk ve saganak yagan yagmur altinda eve gelene kadar sirimsiklam oldum ve daha sonra kisin kar firtina olunca beni calistigim isten gelip almasi icin telefon actigim zaman bana en agir sekilde kufurler etti.

When I told her to stop doing wrong stuff she always threatened me with deportation! Yanlis yapmaya son vermesini soyledigim zaman beni daima sinirdisi ettirmekle tehdit etti. She treated me like slave not like a equal life partner. Bana esit bir hayat arkadasi olarak degil bir kole olarak davrandi.

While I was with my ex wife I never had my own bank account and she took all of my checks and cash to her bank account. Eski esimle birlikte yasadigimiz surede benim kendime ait bir hesabim hic olmadi ve eski esim calisip kazandigim butun cekmediler ve nakit parayi kendi hesabina koydu.

Finally after 2 torturous years she evicted me and my stuff and left a lot of threats to my voice mail and got a protection order with false charges and sent letter to get deported as she always threatened me. Iskence gibi gecen iki yildan sonra beni ve esyalarimi evinden atti ve telefonuma tehditlerle dolu bir suru sesli mesaj birakti. Even though she had a boyfriend on the side but divorced me for not having sex with her! Gizli bir erkek arkadasi olmasina ragmen kendisiyle cinsel iliski kurmadigimi iddia ederek bosanma davasi acti.

Even though she refused to let me to go to trucking school for money shortage she spent thousands of dollars in her divorce and deportation efforts against me. Para yoklugunu one surerek agir vasita surucu okuluna gitmeme karsi cikmasina ragmen bana karsi bosanma ve sinirdisi cabalari icin binlerce dolar harcadi.

While she secretly subscribed to paid porn and adult dating sites she refused to let me go to trucking school for money shortage! Kendisi porno ve seks arkadasi arama sitelerine gizlice parali abone olurken benim agir vasita surucu okuluna gitmeme engel oldu!

As my ex wife did not let me go to trucking school I posted a note on the window of a Turkish store to look for a tractor-trailer driver to get free training. Eski karim agir vasita surucu okuluna gitmeme izin vermedigi icin bir Turk marketinin camina parasiz tir kullanmayi ogrenmek icin ilan yapistirdim. An anti-terror police group harassed and interrogated me why I got my license and posted it. Bir anti-teror polis ekibi neden ehIiyet aldigimi ve ilan astigimi sorarak beni sikistirip sorguya cekti. Turkish store owner who let me post my note was also harassed and interrogated by the same police group for my posting! Turk market sahibi de bana ilan asmak icin izin verdiginden dolayi ayni polis ekibi tarafindan sikistirilip sorgulandi. If my ex wife let me go to trucking school we would not live this terrible experience at all. Eger eski karim agir vasita surucu okuluna gitmeme izin verseydi biz bu korkunc tecrubeyi hic yasamayacaktik.

My ex wife posted a big American flag and a tiny Turkish flag underneath outside her house to prove her mindset that she was master and I was her slave. Eski esim kendini efendi beni de kole gibi goren zihniyetini sergilemek icin evinin onune cok buyuk bir Amerikan bayragi ve altina da kucucuk bir Turk bayragi asti.

She always mixed pork into food she cooked forcing me either to starve or eat pork as if I do not exist at all! Sanki ben hic yokmusum gibi beni acliga veya domuz eti yemege zorlamak icin her pisirdigi yemege domuz eti karistirdi!

As me ex wife evicted me I rented a room from my woman patient client who I drove from hospital to her house with ambulette in Hamptons of Long Island after her knee cap replacement surgery. Eski karim beni evden atinca hastaneden Long lsland’daki Hamptons’daki evine diz kapagi ameliyati gecirdikten sonra ambuletle goturdugum bir bayan musterimin evinde bir oda kiraladim.

My rooming lady in Hamptons got very upset about abuses of my ex wife and started to say scary things like that she will poison my ex wife’s 3 innocent dogs to punish her. Hamptons’daki evini paylastigim hanim eski esimin bana yaptigi kotu muamelelere cok sinirlendi ve onu cezalandirmak icin hicbir sucu olmayan uc kopegini zehirlemek gibi korkunc seyler konusmaya basladi.

While I was escaping from rain I was caught in hail squall. Yagmurdan kacarken doluya yakalandim. I escaped from my dangerous rooming lady by getting a job in a cross country trucking company. Bir uzun yol tir şirketinde sofor olarak is bulunca tehlikeli ev arkadasimdan kurtuldum.

But after a little while I got a phone call to learn that my rooming lady was found dead by overdosing herself with her painkiller drugs. Fakat fazla bir zaman gecmeden bir telefon aldim ve ev arkadasim bayanin agir kesici haplarini asiri dozda aldigi icin yataginda olu bulundugunu ogrendim.

If my ex wife was not so mean my rooming lady would probably still be alive! Eger eski karim bu kadar kotu olmasaydi ev arkadasim bayan belki hala yasiyor olacakti!

When I called taxi one day its driver happened a Turkish guy. Bir gun cagirdigim taksinin soforu Turk cikti. That Turkish driver recommended me to try driving taxi as soon as I get my license. O Taksi soforu Turk bana ehliyetimi alir almaz Taksi soforu olmami tavsiye etti. As soon as I got my driving license I applied at the Bay Shore taxi company to drive their cabs. Ehliyetimi alir almaz Bay Shore Taksi Sirketi’ne takside calismak icin basvurdum. They started me to work as soon as l got a taxi drivers license. Taksi Ehliyetimi alir almaz beni ise baslattilar.

I got one day training with a black taxi driver. Zenci bir Taksi soforu ile bir gun egitim yaptim. He said he used to work in a mental institution before. Bana daha once bir akil hastanesinde calistigini anlatti. He said they fired him because he let patients pick up cigarette butts and smoke them. Hastalarin yerden izmaritleri alip icmesine izin verdigi icin isten atildigini anlatti. He was harsh on me and tried to intimidate me about driving taxi with safety issues. Bana karsi tersti ve Taksi surmenin tehlikelerini anlatip beni korkutmaya calisti.

While driving Taksi I had a lot of discrimination experiences. Taksi surerken bircok yabanci dusmanligina maruz kaldim. One Pakistani taxi driver warned me that taxi company is pitting us each other as were both Muslims! Pakistanli bir Taksi soforu ikimiz de musluman oldugumuz icin bizi birbirimize karsi kiskirttiklarini anlatti.

One day when I was dispatched to make pickups from Fire Island Ferry in Bay Shore the site dispatcher questioned my nationality and cringed his face with rude comments and gave all nice jobs to other drivers while he kept me for a bad job. Bir gun Bay Shore’daki Fire Island Vapur Iskelesine is almak icin yollandim fakat isleri veren müdür benim milliyetimi ogrendikten sonra yuzunu burusturup kaba yorumlar yapti ve beni bekletirken butun guzel isleri sonradan gelen soforlere verdi ve kotu bir is cikinca onu da bana verdi.

A lot of clients made nasty comments about my nationality and religion. Bir cok musteri milliyetimi ve dinimle ilgili berbat yorumlar yaptilar. My ex wife used to say “I am American, my country is greatest country and you are just an alien and your country is shitty country and if you dispute with me I will get you deported immediately”. Eski karim bana “Ben Amerikaliyim, benim ulkenin dunyanin en buyuk ulkesi ve sen sadece bir yabancisin ve senin ulken boktan bir ulke ve bana karsi konusursan seni aninda sinirdisi ettiririm” derdi.

Taxi drivers used to a t-shirt with a Bay Shore Taxi sign on it. Taksi soforleri uzerinde Bay Shore Taksi yazili olan bir tisort giyerlerdi. One day after my work finished I sopped at a Bar before going home. Bir gun isim bittikten sonra eve gitmeden once yolumun ustundeki bir barda durdum. As I said hello to bartender he asked and learned my nationality and then started to curse me like “mother fucker get out of my bar!” Barmene selam verince bana milliyetimi sorup ogrenince bana “defol barimdan…” seklinde agza alinmayacak kufurler edip beni kovdu.

While working as taxi driver I took written test for for commercial driver license. Taksi soforu olarak calisirken agir vasita sofor ehliyeti almak icin yazili sinavlari gectim. I passed tests for triple trailers, tanker, hazmat, passenger bus at once. Uclu treyler, tanker, tehlikeli madde ve otobus yazilisini bir seferinde verdim.

When the 9/11 attacks occurred I was working for a school bus company and driving children to school in Long Island and my trainer who was a black man, learned my nationality and religion and stated that all muslims are terrorists and I must be terorist too. 11 Eylul saldirilari oldugu zaman Long Island’da bir ogrenci tasima servisinde calisiyordum ve cocuklari okula goturuyordum fakat bana egitim veren zenci sofor milliyetimi ve dinimi ogrenditen sonra butun muslumanlarin terorist oldugunu ve benim de musluman oldugum icin terorist olmam lazim geldigini ifade etti.

There was another driver from Iraq who complained to me that even though he is a Jew not Muslim, he suffered a lot of discrimination in the school bus company. Ogrenci servisinde calisan Irakli bir sofor musluman degil yahudi oldugunu ama buna ragmen cok ayrimcilik yasadigindan sikayet etti. My Iraqi Jew co-worker said he had to work there because he lost his car dealership business due to economic crises. Irakli yahudi isyeri arkadasim ekonomik kriz yuzunden araba satis isini kaybettigi icin orada calismaya mecbur kaldigini anlatti.

One day they replaced the matron who was a young black girl in my vehicle. Birgun cocuklara yardim eden muavini degistirip zenci bir genc kizi arabamda gorevlendirdiler. This matron distracted my driving all the time by playing loud music by constantly playing with the knob from all different stations and insulted me like “who are you to speak to me?!” as I asked her kindly to refrain from distracting me. Bu muavini kiz her turlu Radyo kanallarini dugmesiyle surekli karistirip cok yuksek sesle muzik caldirarak beni araba surerken rahatsiz etti ve rahatsiz etmemesini nazikce rica ettigim zaman da bana “Sen Kim oluyorsun da bana boyle konusuyorsun” diye hakaret etti. They fired me supposedly for this incident. Guya bu olaydan dolayi beni isten attilar. Real reason was anti-immigrant discrimination! Gercek neden gocmen dusmani ayrimcilikti!

Then I started to drive ambulette to transport disabled people on wheelchairs. Tekerlikli sandalyeye bagli engelli insanlari tasimak icin minibus kullandim. Mistreatment continued in the ambulette company. Kotu muamele sakat servisinde de surdu. I applied to the government anti-discrimination office to stop discrimination. Ayrimciliga karsi hukumetin ayrimcilikla mucadele Dairesi’ne basvurdum. But my application was rejected without explanation. Fakat basvurum aciklama yapilmadan reddoldu. Then they fired me for retaliation against my justice struggle. Sonra beni hakkimi aramama karsilik intikam icin isten attilar.

While I was seeking a serious driver job I started to work in moving company in Long Island. Ciddi bir agir vasita soforluk isi ararken Long lsland’da bir nakliyat sirketine girdim. My trainer was a black boxer. Egitmenim zenci bir boksordu. As soon as he realized I am Turkish he started to curse and call me Muslim terorist to pick a fight all day. Turk oldugumu anlar anlamaz kavga cikartmak icin butun gun bana kufur edip musluman terorist diye cagirdi.

I quit immediately and started an application to work as a fuel tank truck driver in a fuel delivery company. Derhal isi biraktim ve tanker soforu olarak calismak icin akaryakit sirketlerine mektupla basvuru kampanyasi baslattim. Eventually I started to work as tank truck driver in the Mendelhal, Fuel Company in East Quague of Long Island. Nihayet Long Island’daki East Quague’da bulunan Mendenhall Akaryakit Sirketi’nde tanker soforu olarak ise basladim.

During test driving supervisor John was on the phone fighting with her drug addict girl friend all day and ordering me to violate traffic rules and said I failed the test at the end of the day. Deneme surusunde Sef John (Can okunur) butun gun cep telefonunda uyusturucu muptelasi olan kiz arkadasi ile kavga etti ve trafik kurallarini cignemem icin bana emir verdi ve gun bitince de denemede basarisiz oldugumu soyledi.

Director Nick asked me what happened and told me he personally wanted to give me another test driving in the following day if I wanted. Müdür Nick bana olanlari sordu ve eger istersem sahsen kendisinin bana ertesi gun bir deneme surusu daha yaptirmak istedigini soyledi. After the test Director Nick put me on job as fuel tank truck driver with an experienced driver for a day. Mudur Nick, deneme surusunden sonra beni bir baska usta soforle beraber akaryakit tanker soforu olarak ise baslatti.

I drove fuel oil delivery tanker truck for almost a year. Yaklasik bir yil kadar Akaryakit dagitim tankeri kullandim. I delivered fuel oil to homes in Hamptons area. Hamptons bolgesinde evlere akaryakit verdim. I filled up my tank truck from the main terminal and then find the fillers in the client addresses and plug the hose on the filler and pump the fuel. Tankerimi ana depodan doldurduktan sonra musterinin adresine gidip deponun kapagini buluyordum ve hortumu kapaga taktikkan sonra akaryakiti pompaliyordum.

When I was with Mendenhall Fuel a Chinese American started to work as tank truck driver like me. Mendenhall Fuel Akaryakit sirketinde calisirken bir Cin asilli Amerikali benim gibi tanker soforu olarak calismaya basladi. Chinese American tank truck driver told me a lot of discrimination complaints which sounded like all same stuff I lived through. Cin asilli Amerikali tanker soforu benim yasadiklarima benzer bir suru ayrimcilik sikayetlerini bana anlatti.

He said he was a chef before this job. Bu ise baslamadan once bir ahci oldugunu anlatti. One day at the lunch time he kindly offered everybody from his food he cooked in his house. Bir gun ogle yemegi tatilinde evinde yaptigi yemekten herkese ikram etti. Nobody except me from tens of people in Mendenhall Fuel company accepted his kind offer of food. Benim haricimde onlarca kisiden hicbirisi onun nazik yemek ikramini kabul etmedi. This general refusal really saddened him. Bu genel reddedis onu uzdu. Later another Mendenhall driver warned me that I should not accept his Chinese food because he might cook dogs and cats! Daha sonra baska bir Mendenhall driver Cinli soforun kopek ve kedi eti pisirebilecegi icin bir daha ikramini yememem icin beni uyardi.

There was a mechanic in Mendenhall who was especially mean to me and forcing me to pump grease to joints under the tank truck which was his own job. Mendenhall’da bana karsi ozellikle kotu davranan bir tamir ustasi vardi ve kendi isi olmasina ragmen tankerin altindaki delillere yag pompalama isini zorla bana yaptiriyordu.

This mean mechanic told me get out of here as I attended to a party upon the invitation from the daughter of company owner. Bu kotu tamir ustasi sirketin patronu nun kizinin daveti uzerine katildigim bir partide defol git burdan diyerek beni kovdu.

While this mean mechanic abused me by pretending he is best driver ever another old driver told me that he was actually the worst driver who is trying to hide the fact that he killed an old person while driving. Bu kotu usta kendisi en iyi soformus gibi beni kotu muameleye tabi tutarken aslinda kendisinin tankerle yasli bir insani oldurdugu icin en kotu sofor oldugunu gislemeye calistigini baska bir sofor bana anlatinca ogrendim.

As summer arrived Director Nick told me it gets very slow in the summer and they have to lay me off temporarily for the summer. Yaz mevsimi gelince Müdür Nick bana yazin islerin yavasladigini ve yaz icin beni gecici olarak cikartmak zorunda olduklarini haber verdi. After layoff from Mendenhall I started to work as cross country tractor trailer driver and got highest certificate of safe driver training. Mendenhall’dan cikinca uzun yol tir soforlugune basladim ve emniyetli surucu egitiminde en yuksek dereceli sertifikalari aldim. I visited Mendenhall boss and showed my certificates and in the meantime I found out that they laid me off just to hire a fire truck driver. Mendenhall’un patronunu ziyaret ettim ve sertifikalarimi gosterdim ve bu arada bir itfaiye soforunu ise almak icin beni isten cikardiklarini ogrendim.

As I got the phone call from her sister that my rooming lady killed herself I quit trucking and started driving limo in Manhattan. Ev arkadasimin kendini oldurdugunu kiz kardesinin bana actigi telefonda ogrenince tirciligi biraktim ve Manhattan’da limo kullanmaya basladim. Director Nick started to call me many times to invite me back to work in Mendenhall. Müdür Nick beni bircok kez arayarak Mendenhall’da tekrar ise baslamam icin davet etti. I was so upset with discrimination in Mendenhall I refused to go back. Mendenhall’daki ayrimciliga o kadar kizgindim ki geri donmeyi kabul etmedim. Here: Burda: http://www.mendenhallfuel.com/default.asp

Instead of going back to Mendenhall I drove black car limousine and became owner operator. Mendenhall sirketine donmek yerine limuzin kullandim ve kendi limuzin arabami satin aldim. First I bought my own Lincoln Town Car. Here : Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lincoln_Motor_Company

After I paid off my auto loan for Town Car I bought Mercedes Benz S 430 from the same dealer. Town Car arabamin borcunu odedikten sonra ayni acentadan yine banka borcu ile Mersedes Benz S 430 model araba aldim. Here: Burda: http://www.autotrader.com/find/Mercedes_Benz-S430-cars-for-sale.jsp

After I paid off my Mercedes Benz I bought Cadillac Escalade full sized ESV SUV and worked with it as limo owner operator for years. Mersedesimin borcunu odedikten sonra yine banka borcu ile Amerikan arabasi Kadillak Escalade marka en buyuk boy arabayi alip limuzin isinde kullandim. The reason for my choice of Escalade was its professional protection for livery use. Escalade marka buyuk arabayi secmemin sebebi limo isinde kullanmak icin verilen 150 bin millik servis garantisiydi. Here: Burda : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cadillac_Escalade; http://www.gmfleet.com/overview/cadillac-professional-vehicles.html

Dealer gave me hard time because of my Turkishness and he literally picked a fight with my Pakistani insurance broker almost killed my deal. Satici Turklugumden dolayi bana cok buyuk zorluk cikardi ve arabalarimin sigortalarini yapan sirketin sahibi Pakistanli diye adamla kavga cikartarak isimi nerdeyse bozuyordu. I complained about this discrimination to which they retaliated by denying my professional protection. Bu ayrimciliga karsi yaptigim sikayete karsi beni cezalandirmak icin servis garantimi inkar ettiler. I had to call Cadillac Headquarters to correct the injustice. Haksizligi duzeltmek icin Kadillak Merkezini aramak zorunda kaldim.
Here: Burda: http://www.potamkincadillac.com

As I believe in justice to humans and nature I decided to quit luxury limo service to Wall Street criminals and serve to common people and nature with a motor coach. Insanlara ve dogaya karsi adaleti savundugum icin Wall Street suclularina yaptigim luks limo servisine son vermeyi ve bir otobusle ortalama halka ve dogaya hizmet etmeye karar verdim.

After I updated my driving license finally I bought luxury travel bus.
Ehliyetimi guncelledikten sonra nihayet luks bir turistik seyahat otobusu satin aldim. My bus was a ten-year old 58 passenger capacity C2045 touring model Van Hool. Otobusum 58 koltuklu 10 yasinda Van Hool marka uzun yol C2045 modeliydi. I wanted to take many vehicles off the road to protect nature instead of serving Wall Street criminals with my luxury Cadillac escalade. Luks Kadillak Escalade arabamla wall street cetelerine hizmet etmek yerine bircok arabayi gereksiz kilarak dogayi korumak istedim. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Van_Hool#Touring_coaches ; http://www.abc-companies.com/coachDetail.asp?bus=2009-VH-C2045-46149

I had business problems because of loan, insurance and maintenance payments. Banka kredisi, sigorta ve tamir-bakim odemeleri yuzunden sikintiya dustum. I should not start bus business without guaranteed low expenses. Dusuk odemeleri garanti etmeden otobus isine girmemem gerekirdi. As last hope to save my business I involuntarily entered into business of carrying passengers of Tropicana Casino.
Son care umuduyla isimi kurtarmak icin Tropikana gazinosunun musterilerini tasima isine mecburen girdim.

I lost my luxury motor coach while working for Tropicana Casino in Atlantic City . Atlantic City’deki Tropicana Gazinosu’nun musterilerini tasirken luks seyahat otobusumu kaybettim. I transported casino customers from New York Chinatown to Atlantic City everyday two times. Hergun iki sefer yaparak New York Chinatown’dan Atlantik City’ye gazino musterilerini tasidim.

Tropicana Casino encouraged its exclusive agent to gamble too much in Tropicana. Tropicana gazinosu, tek yetkili acentasini asiri kumar oynamaya tesvik etti. Tropicana kept its exclusive agent’s wages for his gambling debt. Tropikana gazinosu kumar borcuna karsilik tek yetkili acentasinin alacagina el koyup vermedi.

This way, Tropicana deliberately and willingly prevented its exclusive agent to pay my wages. Bu sekilde, Tropicana kendi tek yetkili acentasina benim alacaklarimi
odettirmedi. That action resulted in my bankruptcy first. Bu hareketle, Tropikana once benim iflasima bile bile isteyerek neden oldu.

Later on Tropicana pushed its own exclusive agent’s bankruptcy too. Daha sonra Tropikana tek yetkili acentasini da iflasa itti. Tropicana is biggest casino chain in the
world.
Tropicana dunyanin en buyuk gazino zinciridir. I tried to complain everywhere I could but I had nothing other than bitter experience from the American injustice system. Basvurabildigim heryere adalet icin basvurdum ancak Amerikan Adaletsizlik Sisteminde aci bir tecrubeden baska birsey gormedim. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tropicana_Casino_%26_Resort_Atlantic_City

$30K bad checks for my Tropicana service remains in the open. Tropikana’ya yaptigim hizmetin karsiligi olan 30 bin dolarlik karsiliksiz cekler hala ortada duruyor. American injustice system played same delaying tactics like the Turkish one. Turk Sistemi gibi Amerikan Adaletsizlik Sistemi de ayni oyalama taktiklerini uyguladi. Here: Burda: http://libertyblitzkrieg.com/2013/08/15/a-broken-corrupt-and-immoral-criminal-justice-system/

When you are blacklisted you are blacklisted everywhere globally. Bir kere
mimlendiysen kuresel olarak heryerde mimlendin demektir. In the United States I could never save any money for myself as l always had to use loan and work crazy long hours to pay to loan sharks like my brother Sezai! Amerika’da herzaman kredi kullanmak ve kardesim Sezai gibi tefecilere borc odemek icin manyakca uzun saatler calismak zorunda kaldigimdan kiyida hicbir para biriktiremedim.

I realized that justice is impossible as the whole system is crime itself and went to United Nations to continue my justice struggle. Tum sistemin bizzat kendisi suc oldugu icin adaletin imkansiz oldugunu farkettim ve hak arama mucadelemi surdurmek icin Birlesmis Milletler’in onune gittim. Personal Security Police officer of Consul General Mehmet Samsar came to me and harassed me with his questions. Baskonsolos Mehmet Samsar’in ozel koruma polisi yanima gelerek sorulariyla beni taciz etti. Mehmet Samsar started his his diplomatic career in the same diplomatic training programiyla with me in December 1986 and assigned ambassador to Kiev. Mehmet Samsar diplomatik meslek memurluguna 1986 Aralik ayinda benimle birlikte ayni diplomatik egitim programiyla basladi ve Kiev’e Buyukelci olarak gitti. Here: Burda: http://www.egitimataseliginy.org/etknlklermz.html ; http://unitedamericanmuslim.org/news.php?newsid=182 ; http://www.bugun.com.tr/pages/mnews.aspx?id=910826

While I got interrogation harassment from Turkish Consul General’s body guard I got very warm friendship from other UN protesters, mainly Chinese dissents. Turk Baskonsosun korunmasindan sorgu tacizi gormeme karsilik BM onunde esas olarak Cinliler olmak uzere oteki gostericilerden cok sicak arkadaslik gordum. As Chinese protester friends suggested I went with them to join the Occupy Wall Street protest in Liberty Zuccotti Park in downtown Manhattan from its beginning. Cinli protestocu arkadaslarin onerine uyarak Asagi Manhattan’da yeralan Liberty Zuccotti Park’taki Wall Street’i Isgal eylemlerine en basindan katildim.

I joined the Occupy Wall Street movement from the beginning to protest all the injustice I
experienced in my life.
Butun yasadigim adaletsizlikleri proteste etmek icin Wall Street’i Isgal Hareketi’ne en basindan katildim. I tasted same power of freedom as I was marching in Turkey. Turkiyedeki yuruyuslerimde duydugum ayni ozgurlugun gucunu tattim. I continued my protest everyday and never quit even now. Protestomu hergun surdurdum ve halen de asla vazgecmedim.

I did seven day hunger strike to protest all injustice. Tum adaletsizligi protesto etmek icin yedi gun kesintisiz aclik grevi yaptim. I never ate or drunk anything except plain water. Sade sudan baska hicbir sey yiyip icmedim. I was sleeping outside but as weather got colder I set up my small tent and stayed in it until NYPD brutalized and arrested me and destroyed my tent and stuff with so many other occupiers. Acikta uyuyordum fakat hava soguyunca kendime kucuk bir cadir kurdum ve New York Polisi tarafindan cok sayida diger diger eylemcilerle birlikte siddete maruz kalip tutuklandigim ve cadirim ve esyalarim mahvedilip alinincaya kadar cadirimda kaldim.

Greatest effect of OWS protest was that it became the voice of voiceless masses. OWS protestosunun en buyuk etkisi sessiz yiginlarin sesi olmasiydi. But unfortunately this voice did not include trillions of innocent animals who are tortured and slaughtered every year. Fakat maalesef bu ses her yil iskence edilen ve bogazlanan trilyonlarca masum hayvani kapsamiyordu.

However this great movement is died thanks to FBI/CIA programs but I never quit it and still continue my protest on daily basis. Ancak bu buyuk hareket FBI/CIA programlari yuzunden bitti fakat ben protestomu hicbir zaman kesmedim ve yine hergun olarak surduruyorum.

I was brutalized so badly in various ways with it. Hareketle birlikte
ben de bircok yonden cok feci darbelere maruz kaldim. Again I was blacklisted by FBI/CIA connected organizers in the movement. Hareketin icindeki FBI/CIA baglantili organizatorler tarafindan mimlendim.

I started livestreaming everyday with the occupy movement and l am still on it. Isgal hareketiyle birlikte ben Internet uzerinden hergun canli televizyon yayinina basladim ve halen devam ediyorum. I believe advanced Livestream will be totally free-independent and will free our world from this insane civilization and transform us into a humane space civilization. Ileri Livestream teknolojisinin ileride tumden ozgur-bagimsiz olacagini ve dunyamizi bu ilkel medeniyetten kurtaracagina ve bizi insancil uzay medeniyetine tasiyacagina inaniyorum.

In ten years computers will be wearable and match human intelligence and senses. On yil icinde bilgisayarlar gozluk boyutunda olacak ve insan zekasi ve algilarina erisecek. Our internet will be massively intelligent. Internetimiz muazzam derecede akilli olacak. From my personal experiences this is only thing to save our world from its cruel fall. Benim sahsi tecrubelerime gore bu akilli internet dunyamizi yuvarlandigi cukura an kurtaracak tek seydir. Here: Burda: http://www.zdnet.com/ces-2014-intel-stresses-need-for-natural-computing-with-realsense-7000024834/

Police state thinks my livestream camera on police brutality and on corruption as it is a machine gun hitting on target and wants to arrest me immediately for livestreaming. Polis devleti, canli yayin kamerami polis vahsetine ve yolsuzluga karsi hedefi vuran bir makineli tufek gibi goruyor ve canli yayin yaptigim icin beni aninda tutuklamak istiyor. I was arrested four times and assaulted so many times by police state in open and hidden ways. Polis devleti tarafindan Dort kere tutukladim, her keresinde dovuldum ve iskence gordum ve sayisiz kereler acik veya gizli sekilde saldirilara maruz kaldim.

So I carry my sign as blacklisted hitman. Bu yuzden mimli tetikci dovizi tasiyorum. I am still blacklisted hitman all my life! Butun hayatim boyunca oldugu gibi halen mimli tetikciyim! I shoot the film of the truth but only truth. Gercegin fakat sadece gercegin filmini cekiyorum. I shoot truth to the corrupt world. Bozuk duzene karsi gercegi atesliyorum.

I immortalize the life by livestream recording. Hayati canli yayinla kayda alip olumsuzlestiriyorum. I show that anybody can do livestream and quicken decline of old media like CNN. Herhangi birinin canli Yayin yapabilecegini ve CNN gibi eski medyanin I isini hizlandirabilecegini gosteriyorum.

Now I am fighting for total liberation for animals, humans and earth. Bugun hayvanlarin, insanlarin ve yeryuzunun topyekun kurtulusu icin mucadele ediyorum. I belive in that people should not follow their own favorite single issues but should love all the
liberation causes with equal degree.
Herkesin sadece kendi hosuna giden bir ozgurluk davasinin pesine dusmesi degil butun kurtulus davalarina ayni derecede gonul vermesi gerektigine
inaniyorum .

I believe defending a human liberation movement while we slave and eat animals and destroy earth is going only halfway . Hayvanlari kole gibi gorurken ve yemek olarak yerken ve yerkuremizi yokederken savunulan bir insan ozgurlugu hareketinin yarim kaldigina inaniyorum. I do not accept a movement which favors one dimension and does not
care about the other.
Bir boyuta takilip otekini bos veren bir hareketi kabul etmiyorum. This is total hypocrisy. Bu tamamen iki yuzluluk. I believe in total liberation. Topyekun kurtulusa inaniyorum. I am a raw vegan. Yemek pisirmeyen veganim. I eat only fresh vegetables, fruits and various nuts and seeds without cooking. Yemek pisirmeden sadece taze sebze, meyva ve cesitli kuruyemis yiyorum.

Heat kills the nutritional value of fresh food. Sicaklik taze gidalarin gida degerini oldurur. Cooking kills nutritions. Yemek pisirmek gidalari oldurur. It is well established fact that heat destroys natural chemical elements in the fresh produce. Isinin taze sebze ve meyvalardaki dogal kimyasal elemanlari bozdugu cok iyi ispatlanmis gercektir. Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raw_veganism

Using energy to cook also destroys our earth. Yemek pisirmek icin enerji kullanimi da dunyamizi yok ediyor. Extracting and using energy destroys our earth. Enerji cikartmak ve kullanmak dunyamizi yok ediyor.

Eating animals is bad in all means. Hayvanlari yemek her yonden zararlidir.
It is hurting animals very much. Hayvanlar cok acilar cekiyor. Animal products hurt our health. Hayvansal urunler saglimizi mahvediyor. Most diseases are result of animal food. Cogu hastalik hayvansal gidalardan geliyor.

And this whole process is destructive for our natural ecosystem. Ve butun bu surec doga sistemimiz icin cok zararlidir. I am blacklisted for this too by animal enemies.. Hayvan dusmanlari tarafindan bu nedenle de mimlendim. Now I know very well once you are blacklisted you are blacklisted forever. Simdi bir kere mimlenince bunun ebediyyen surecegini cok iyi biliyorum.

I accept grim reality. Aci gercegi kabul ediyorum. I know my enemy is global capitalist empire and its hitmen Gladio all over the world. Dusmanimin kuresel kapitalist imparatorluk ve kuresel tetikcisi Gladyo oldugunu biliyorum. This system produces racist fascists like my father. Bu sistem babam gibi irkci fasistler uretir.

Sides are clear now. Saflar net artik. Therefore now I am content. Bu nedenle artik huzurluyum. I am happy. Mutluyum. Because I stand with light of truth against darkness of oppression. Cunku gerçegin isigiyla
zulmun karanligina karsi dikiliyorum. Here is a link for info on blacklisted individuals. Mimlenen sahislarla ilgili bilgiler veren bir link burda: Here: Burda:

http://peacepink.ning.com/profiles/blogs/here-is-a-list-of-references-and-links-about-electronic-torture

Masses are drugged and very happy with their slavery. Kitleler uyusturulmus ve koleliklerinden cok mutlu durumdalar. The blacklisted will always be awake and be put on target. Mimliler hep uyanik olacak ve hedefe konulacak. This is sad but true. Bu aci ama gercek.

Aldous Huxley and George Orwell still compete! Aldous Huxley ve
George Orwell halen yarisiyorlar! Here: Burda:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2111440/Aldous-Huxley-letter-George-Orwell-1984-sheds-light-different-ideas.html

In fact, rulers never quit Huxley’s carrot or Orwell’s stick policy! Aslinda yöneticiler Huxley’nin havuc veya Orwell’in sopa politikasindan asla vazgecmezler. We better find ways to imagine another world without rulers. Yöneticilerin olmadigi bir dunyayi hayal etsek cok daha iyi olur.

I am trying to show such a world is possible with Blacklisted Gladio Hitman. Mimli Gladyo Tetikcisi ile boyle bir dunyanin mumkun oldugunu gostermeye calisiyorum. I made a new wearable sign/banner to replace the old one on me to protest cruelty in Turkey and in the world everywhere I go around the New York City. New York’ta gittigim heryerde Turkiye’de ve dunyadaki zulmu protesto etmek icin ustumdeki pankartin yerine tasinabilir yeni bir pankart yaptim. It is “Blacklisted Hitman”. “Mimli Tetikci” seklinde.

Tony the Baloney pretended as my friend during my livestreaming in the Occupy Wall Street events. Palavraci Tony Wall Street’i Isgal eylemlerinde yaptigim canli yayinlara yalandan arkadasim gibi hareket etti. As my livestream viewers and friends warned me about his efforts to get me arrested I tried to avoid Tony the Baloney. Canli yayin izleyicilerim ve arkadaslarim Palavraci Tony’nin beni tutuklatmak icin yaptigi gayretler konusunda beni uyarinca Palavraci Tony’den uzak durmaya calistim.

But Tony the Baloney forced his way to sabotage my livestream and constantly cursed to my viewers and friends on my livestream. Fakat Palavraci Tony zorla canli yayinima sabotaj yapti ve canli yayinim esnasinda izleyicilerime ve arkadaslarima surekli sovdu. Tony the Baloney organized other self-claimed Occupy Wall Street movement leaders to continuesly attack me both physically and verbally. Palavraci Tony Wall Street’i Isgal Hareketinin kendinden menkul liderlerini bana karsi surekli olarak hem fiziksel hem de sozlu saldirilari yapmak icin organize etti.

Tony the Baloney physically assaulted me many times to provoke and get me arrested in Union Square Park, in Liberty-Zuccotti Park and in Federal Hall Steps. Palavraci Tony, Union Square Park’ta, Liberty-Zuccotti Park’ta ve Federal Hall Steps merdivenlerinde beni provoke edip polise tutuklattirmak icin bana bircok kez fiziksel olarak saldirdi.

Tony the Baloney also organized other occupiers to assault me to provoke and to get me arrested at occupy sleeping action in front of Trinity Church under auspices of Fake Muslim Fatimah. Palavraci Tony, Sahte Musluman Fatimah desteginde Trinity Kilisesi onundeki isgal eyleminde beni provoke edip tutuklatmak icin oteki isgalcileri bana karsi fiziki saldiri icin organize etti. Fake Muslim Fatimah who led the Trinity Church occupation, was reported to be a catholic nun faking a devout Muslim in hijab and snitched many activists to cops and run away with donation moies. Trinity Church isgalini is are eden Sahte Musluman Fatimah’nin kapali musluman kadin rolu yapan bir rahibe oldugu ve bircok eylemciyi polise ispiyonladigi ve bagis paralarini calarak kactigi bildirildi.

Fatimah proudly defended her warm relationship with cops on camera like all other self claimed occupy leaders who assaulted me. Bana saldiran oteki sozde isgal liderlerinin hepsi gibi polislerle sicak arkadasligini kamera onunde savundu. Tony the Baloney, Fake Muslim Fatimah and Shorty Aaron Minter Black all showed their warm relationship with cops. Palavraci Tony, Sahte Musluman Fatimah ve Aaron Minter Black yani hepsi polislerle sicak iliskilerini gosterdiler.

Aaron Minter Black prevented me from livestreaming as he yelled at me that cops and wealthy Wall Street residents do not like livestreaming and he got a sergeant assaulted me for livestreaming in Wall Street and in Union Square Park and he enjoyed chatting long time with police captain who assaulted me on camera . Aaron Minter Black polislerin ve zengin Wall Street sakinlerinin canli yayin istemediklerini bana bagirarak soyledi ve canli yayin yaptigim icin Union Square Parkinin onunde polis komiserine beni ispiyonlayip dovdurdu ve beni kamera onunde doven polis yuzbasisi Brooks ile cok uzun dostca sohbetler yapti.

Another Occupy Wall Street wannabe leader Justin Stone Diaz assaulted me to provoke to get me arrested during a general assembly meeting in Liberty Zuccotti Park arguing that I should not livestream freely as a participant woman does not want to be filmed. Baska bir Occupy Wall Street lider heveslisi olan justin Stone Diaz Liberty Zuccotti Park’taki bir Genel Kurul toplantisinda bir katilimi kadinin filminin cekilmisine karsi oldugunu one surerek benim serbestce canli yayin yapamayacagimi one surerek bana herkesin icinde fiilen saldirdi. Like this assault on freedom of press is not enough he made all the general assembly participants repeat after him that I livestream for the cops. Sanki basin ozgurlugune yapilan bu fiziki saldiri yetmemis gibi Justin Stone Diaz genel kurulsun butun katilimcilarina benim polisler icin canli yayin yaptigimi bagirarak tekrar ettirdi. Here: Burda:http://www.brendanhunt.com/1/post/2013/08/seiu-network-infiltrating-manipulating-occupy-movement.html ; http://www.styleite.com/news/occupy-wall-street-fashion-week-protest/

All this violent and repressive culture targeted me because of my Turkishness. Tum bu siddet ve baskici kultur Turklugumden dolayi beni hedef aldi. Same xenophobic and anti-immigrant culture since airport continued in the Occupy Wall Street Movement. Havaalindan beri sure gelen yabanci dusmani ve gocmen karsiti ayni kultur Wall Street’i Isgal Hareketi’nde surdu.

From the time I joined Occupy Wall Street movement I started livestream journalism. Wall Street’i Isgal Hareketi’ne katildigim zamandan beri canli yayin gazeteciligimi baslattim.
You can watch my blacklisted hitman ustream channel everyday. Hergun Mimli Tetikci canli yayin gazeteciligimi ustream kanalimdan izleyebilirsiniz.

I focus on total liberation issues. Topyekun Kurtulus konularina yogunlasiyorum. I defend animals, humans and earth equally. Hayvanlara, insanlara ve yeryuzune esit derecede sahip cikiyorum. Humans destroy the earth deliberately but animals never do such a stupid action. Insanlar bile bile dunyayi yok ederler ama hayvanlar asla boyle bir budalalik yapmazlar.

Now we are in the middle of 6th total extinction phase! Su anda 6.ci topyekun yok olma surecinin tam ortasindayiz.If we are really intelligent we should stop this. Gercekten akilliysak bunu durdurmamiz lazim. Here: Burda:
http://6thextinctiondoc.com/ Here: Burda: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holocene_extinction

No animal will also practice sadism for fun. Hicbir hayvan zevk icin sadistlik te yapmaz. Human race is so stupid to destroy all planet but we still think that we are higher and more intelligent than animals. Insanoglu iste butun dunyayi yok edecek kadar aptaldir ama yine insanlarin hayvanlardan daha ustun ve daha akilli oldugunu zanneder.

If you want to join my fight for total liberation things are easy. Eger Topyekun Kurtulus mucadeleme katilmak istiyorsaniz isler kolay If you look up only recai iskender you can reach me on all social media. Sadece Recai Iskender yazip nette aratirsaniz herturlu sosyal medyadan bana ulasabilirsiniz.

Have a great day. Iyi gunler sizin olsun. I hope to meet you in my blacklisted channel. Umarim mimli kanalimda gorusuruz. I will try to write my life story as much as possible. Hayat hikayemi elimden geldigi kadar yazmaya calisacagim.

I welcome all your help Herturlu yardiminizi sevincle karsilarim. I keep writing first English in bold fonts and then Turkish in regular fonts consequently as it is much easier to keep the order of the subjects. Konularin sirasini takip etmek cok daha kolay oldugu icin lngilizceyi koyu puntolarla ve Turkceyi normal puntolarla pespese yaziyorum.

I prefer adding and improving my writing instead of worrying to separate English from Turkish pages. Ingilizceyi Turkceden ayirmakla ugrasmak yerine yazima yeni ekler yapmayi ve daha iyi yazmayi tercih ederim. Moreover, l think it is easier to find right matches of the words when I write English and Turkish in a consecutive order. Ayrica bu
sekilde Ingilizce ve Turkceyi pespese yazarak kelimelerin oteki dildeki dogru karsiliklarini bulmak daha kolay olur diye dusunuyorum.

I love writing everyday as it is self healing and doing my contribution to transform this insane world into a humane one. Kendi kendine terapi oldugu icin ve bu manyak dunyayi insancil bir sekle donusturmek icin kendi payima duseni yapmak icin hergun yaziyorum. I am adding new stuff here everyday. Hergun buraya yeni seyler ekliyorum.

As I was always targeted in every protest during my livestreams and never got solidarity from protest community now l only do my daily livestream show in Union Square Park in Manhattan. Canli yayinlarim sirasinda her gittigim protestoda hedef alindigim ve protestocu toplumdan dayanisma gormedigim icin simdi sadece Manhattan’daki Union Square Park’ta gunluk canli yayin programimi yapiyorum. This lack of solidarity also proves no interest from protest community to this Blacklisted Hitman autobiography. Bu dayanisma yoklugu protesto toplumunun bu Mimli Tetikci otobiyografime ilgisizligiyle de ispatlanmistir. Real reason of this cold attitude is the same xenophobic anti-immigrant culture. Bu soguk yaklasimin asil sebebi ayni yabanci dusmani gocmen karsiti kulturdur.

I am a victim of 12 September 1980 military coup d’états, 28 February 1997 post-modern coup d’états and “Monshers” of Foreign Ministry. Ben 12 Eylul 1980 askeri darbesinin, 28 Subat 1997 Post-modern darbenin ve Disisleri Bakanligi’ndaki Monserler’in magduruyum. I am a victim of Kemalist-Ataturkist oligarchs for exactly 34 years.Kemalist-Ataturkcu oligarklarin tam 34 yildir magduruyum.

I believe a saying that if you are no good to yourself you can not be good to anybody. Kendisine hayri olmayanin baskasina da hayri olmayacagi seklindeki soze inaniyorum. Therefore I want to go back and continue my justice struggle against Kemalist-Ataturkist oppressors. Bu nedenle ulkeme geri donup Kemalist-Ataturkcu zalimlere karsi hak arama mucadelemi surdurmek istiyorum.

I understood that zionist power centers has plans to take down Turkey by attacking Prime Minister Tayyip Erdogan. Siyonist guc merkezlerinin Basbakan Tayyip Erdogana saldirarak Turkiyeyi dusurme planlari oldugunu anladim.

I realized that Zionist forces organized to destroy Turkey by preventing Erdogan’s peace initiative to Kurdish people. Siyonist guclerin Erdoganin Kurtlere yonelik baris acilimini onleyerek Turkiyeyi mahvetmek istediklerini farkettim. Zionists and its local collaborators wanted to make coup d’états by organizing Gezi protests and by prosecuting Turkey’s Intelligence chief Hakan Fidan and Prime Minister for terror and corruption charges. Siyonistler ve yerli isbirlikcileri Gezi protestolarini duzenlediler ve Turkiye’nin istihbarat Sefi Hakan Fidan’i ve Basbakan’i teror ve yolsuzluktan yargilayip darbe yapmak istediler.

I believe defending Erdogan is defending Turkey against Zionist world state. Erdogani savunmanin Turkiye’yi Siyonist Dunya Devleti’ne karsi savunmak olduguna inaniyorum. Here: Burda: http://yenisafak.mobi/gundem-haber/moderator-rubin-tarih-12-subat-2013-23.03.2011-533719?ref=manset-14.1

Before 1980 coup d’états Kemalist CHP and MHP and AP served to NATO GLADIO to push young people into terrorism and a coup d’états. 1980 Askeri darbesinden once Kemalist CHP ve MHP ve AP genc halki terorizme ve darbeye itmek icin NATO GLADYO’ya hizmet ettiler. From right and left they brought the country to a military coup organized by NATO GLADIO. Onlar sagdan ve soldan ulkeyi NATO GLADYO tarafindan planlanan bir askeri darbeye getirdiler.

Same way today Kemalist CHP and MHP joined forces against people’s choice AKP and want to drag turkey into chaos and coup d’états to serve Zionist illimunati. Ayni sekilde bugun Kemalist CHP ve MHP halkin tercihi olan AKP’ye karsi guclerini birlestirip Turkiyeyi kaos ve darbeye surukleyip siyonist illimunatiye hizmet ediyorlar.

Advanced livestream for radical humane civilization…

8 Mar

I just read this article and wanted to say a few words on the very near future of our world. Here is the article: http://darrenjohnson42.blogspot.com/2013/03/the-future-of-radical-transparency.html?showComment=1362688341685

We will have very powerful computers built into eyeglasses. They will constantly share what they see around them. Almost everybody will have them. They will recognize and tag anybody they see and turn all the voices into text format instantly. All this video,voice and converted text will be online instantly. Almost all the world will be like this. You will see all the history of words and social relationships of any person in your eyeglass. There will be no secret and conspiracy. It will be advanced livestream for radical transparency.

I think as there is no secret and conspiracy there will be no crime and corruption. As everybody is radically connected there will be no abandoned persons. There will be no feeling of loneliness. There will be no oppressor or oppressed. As crime and brutality disappears there will be no need for government and its protection. It will be radical self-government.

We will be so connected and networked that there will be no need for silly competition. Radical social networking will turn all the world into one massive commune. There will be no corporations. There will be no haves and havenots.

Once we have such a peaceful radical livestream we will apply our cruelty free ways to all animals and earth. We will have total liberation in the world. Once we begin radical science with radical livestream we will know the secrets of cosmic quantum and transform emptiness of space into necessities for our world commune. We will build a humane space faring civilization.

As I wrote this stuff I cannot pass without a link to the origins of this destructive innovation of capitalist Google and its protective FBI. here is the link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Creative_destruction

Sure enough, I must also mention the global mind concept to show where we are going. Here is the link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Global_brain

Naturally there is a lot of people fighting against technology, but animals could survive only by using amazing technologies for millions of years. Here we go: http://www.cracked.com/article_17603_6-modern-technologies-animals-invented-millions-years-ago.html

If you are really against use of tool which is primitive technology then you are to be a laughing stock for most animals. Take a look how animals use tools here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tool_use_by_animals,

Total Revolution is to turn all public private space into available online networked data as free for masses!!! http://t.co/HSGERpTOeK http://techcrunch.com/2013/03/16/whos-afraid Continue reading

Livestream is the future and will eliminate top down social structures !

6 Mar

The other night, I participated in a meeting for stop mass incarceration by Bob Awaikian’s Revolutionary Communist Party. First of all, it was in Riverside Church which was funded by Rockefeller who was number enemy of the oppressed peoples! Rich offered another place named theater 80 at St. Marks Place but RCP did not even listen. RCP insists that youth does not show up at the meetings as they are so afraid.
Then I stressed that youth is full of explosive energy and never afraid of filling in the jails by killing each other everyday. Fear is with RCP not with the youth. Youth needs real leaders like Mummia Abu Jamal and Leonard Peltiere who are framed by the terrorist government for life in prison, not RCP hypocrites. Again, ignored by RCP as my suggestion to include prisoners of animal rights and earth rights movement. RCP does great disservice to liberation movement by imposing its shortsighted cult politics on good willing activists.

Of course, RCP is all about personal cult of Bob Awaikian and totally resisting use of live streaming its events. They cannot help excluding general public participating and steering events. Some of many reasons why movement is not growing.

When I can do Iball livestreaming there will be no chance for any cult ot central politics!!! http://www.thefinaledition.com/article/in-move-to-smash-googles-project-glass-apple-announces-the-iball.html

In case Apple wants to be another Nokia then we got other innovators here to destroy current central power structure and give it to the masses as Marx foresaw it.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/04/google-glass-alternatives_n_2735818.html#slide=2135419

Power to all species! Total revolution is here…

4 Feb

Signals will be bonded together. We will have guaranteed wireless data connection over all the wireless networks. Connection will be made over many available networks in the same time. So people will have true unlimited data connection.

We will have eyeglass with computers more powerful than today’s super computers. We will share everything we see and think instantly with everybody who are willing to see without any limit. We will be able to control our eyeglass sharing with eye and mind manipulation. We will hear with bone vibration in total privacy and speak with throat vibrations in the same secrecy.

We will be sharing all we see instantly with everybody and store these videos in many safe archives which cannot be deleted. We will not depend on corporations like google for search or store our archives. Storage will be so easy like we will be storing the universe into a single atom. Everybody will be safe from brutality behind the wall of secrecy. We will have total radical transparency protecting the truth forever.

People knowing the truth will be protected from any danger will join the protest against brutality. Many millions will come together everyday like global uprising and awakening forever. Cruelty will be eliminated and a humane civilization will be established by this awakening and nonstop uprising. Cruelty free life will be established for all species, humans, animals and ecosystem.

Perfect Occupation by the Oppressed

12 Jan

There is massive abuse in prisons and we should support any occupation by prisoners to improve their conditions. There is huge abuse in mental hospitals against patients and we should sport any occupation by mental patients to improve their conditions. Same thing is for homeless people like Sandy victims. We should support any occupation of the FEMA or of Congress building by homeless victims to improve their conditions. Same goes for drug addicts who are abused by the system. We should support any occupation of the Courts, prisons or of Congress building by dry addicts to improve their conditions.

If these same people come to Zuccotti park and start an occupation we should support them. We should encourage more mentally ills, more criminals, more addicts, more homeless join the occupation. This is their demonstration of their own reality. No need for a leader, no need for a list of demands, no need for a worry to make a good image on the media. Their reality is their demonstration. Their plain and simple life is all we need to show and encourage all the oppressed join in that occupation.

I am looking for this kind of occupation everyday. I hope that this time bourgeois control freaks do not come and destroy it by evicting those real oppressed people from the park. When they did not have enough force they collaborated with the 1% and their private armies nypd and the media to destroy real occupation. Real occupation belongs to real oppressed people. It has nothing to do with clean looking freaks of bourgeois.

Total Compassion Revolution

17 Nov

Last 50,000 years, total number of humans died is less than 110 billions. However, humans murder trillion animals every year just for food. More murders continue for fur, leather, testing and other cruel reasons. This cruelty destroys ecosystems and social morality in the same time. This is global suicide. Broken ecobalance will eventually strike back. Self-correcting concept of universe will work. A pandemic disease will kill all humans.

However, if we all go vegan then humanity can make a peaceful smooth transition to quantum computer revolution which turn all universe into massive heaven and resurrect all dead back to life, all young and healthy.

Origin of murder, violence and war is animal hunting. Origin of exploitation, deception and oppression is animal domestication. War on animals is the oldest and biggest one. If we all go vegan we can save all animals, our healths, our peace and justice, and our planet.

I stood up for human rights all my life. I took part in the Occupy Wall Street from the beginning. I livestream for more than one year. Last two months I am vegan activist in Times Square, NYC.

I would love to meet you on my social media or in my daily vegan livestream all-in-one action in Times Square. If you google my name you will get all of my social media contacts (FB, twitter, wordpress, youtube, all media coverage) under recai iskender. You can also get my ustream live stream channel and watch it live or from archive and chat on the show if you google my channel name recaiiskender3. Please make online donations to my wepay.com if you want to spend your money for the same cause.

Boycott the global suicide!

5 Oct

Boycott the global suicide!

We have war on animals, on earth, on humans. Animal products are bad for health. All diseases come from animal products. Health and medical treatment are biggest problems. Global warming also comes from animal products. We destroy earth to get animal products. We poison air, water and soil. This is global warming. We learn and perpetuate cruelty and violence from animal products from cradle to the grave. We repeat the same cruelty to each other and never get peace and security in our hearts and minds. We get massive crime and cruelty for this. That is why we have constant wars, crimes, corruption, massive insecurity and mental health issues. Animal products destroy our physical and mental health, our planet and our security and peace. We cannot even have a little chance to get back our health, our earth, peace and security even if we spend all the money in the world. This is how we become slaves for this destructive capitalist system. Solution is to boycott this cruel economy and its slave political systems. If everybody goes vegan and abstains from all elections we can save our health, our earth and our security and sanity.

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